This Troper was in Summer Camp and the head counselor started singing a repeat after me song. Most of the songs were ho-hum but these verses made me crack up

ORIGINAL ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom Chicka Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Boom!" ''"Uh-Huh!"'' "''Alright!''"

BATMAN(overly gritty voice) ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom Chicka Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Boom!" ''"Uh-Huh!"'' "''WHERE IS SHE!?"''

JOKER (Heath Ledger voice) ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom Chicka Boom!"'' ''"I said a Boom-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Rocka-Chicka-Boom!" ''"Uh-Huh!"'' "''You wanna know how I got these scars?''"

This troper recently acquired a Dr. Who audiobook, and noticed the individual tracks were named by the first few words of said track. Cue nearly spitting my tea over my screen (and an undignified yelp of "Great A'Tuin up a POLE, did I download Dr. Who PORN?!") as I noticed a track named "Out Your Cum"! Turned out it was "Out You Come", but written as if with a heavy accent.

What could be best described as a "Prank Gone Wrong Gone Right As Hell" began as thus, the best friend of ThisTroper Will, noticed a girl leaving an ''open'' bottle of Coke on our table and walked away. Cue Will telling nobody to look under the table as he takes said bottle and wipes the mouth of the bottle with his '''NUTSACK''' and we wait for the girl to take the bottle back to her table and we patiently wait for her to drink. Brandon, a borderline JerkWithAHeartOfGold was at that table and about to drink, but we warn him that Will messed with it. More time goes by and Brandon forgets and walks towards us in a combination of "up yours" and auditioning for a Coke commercial as he takes a big swig. Cue BigNo turned into raving, fall-off-the-bench laughter when he throws up from either the taste and/or remembering and avoids us for about a month as we literally laughed all the way home.

At the dorm Christmas party, a bunch of us starting singing Christmas carols. However, we were emphasizing certain words to make them sound smutty. One guy finally snaps and yells, "Stop making Chistmas songs sexual! 'Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus'- ''DAMMIT!!!''" As the entire room collapsed in laughter, he just glared at us and said, "I hate you all."

This troper was at a very boring talk about SATs. When the speaker was having technical difficutlies, his mom said that the microphone seemed to be malfunctioning. His reply: "Good".

Typos can produce so many CMoFs, but the one that made this troper laugh herself insane was after she linked one of her friends a page on TV Tropes (ForeignFanservice, I belive), he said STERO'''TITS''' AHOY! He said he meant to say Sterotypes, but I just laughed myself to death instead.

I was either eight or nine when I was in a shoe store with my mother getting new shoes for school. One of the employees, having finished with his last customer said, "If anyone needs help just holler." Just as he said this a guy walked in and without a moment's hesitation went "AHHHHHGH!" The employee without missing a beat turned to face the guy and said, with a totally straight face "Yes sir, how can I help you?" My mother and I along with everyone else in the store (it wasn't a very big store) were laughing our asses off. To put this into perspective, this happened about 30 years ago, and has stuck with me all this time.

Another moment the above troper just remembered. I was walking with a friend of mine one night and we were talking about religion and how someone had tried to convince him that his religious beliefs were wrong because they weren't the same as theirs. I said, "Personally I don't give a shit what you believe in. We have this thing in America called Freedom Of Religion. I don't care if you believe in God, Bhudda, or ''Vorgo the Corruptor''..." My friend started laughing so hard he fell to his knees and we both laughed for a good two-three minutes. Good thing it was late at night and no one else was on the streets.

And yet two more that spring to mind. When the first ''Blade'' movie came out, during the climax, when Blade kills Deacon Frost by making him explode (and if you haven't seen the movie I'm not explaining it), I said "Now who's gonna clean all that up?" Cue the whole theater laughing, including the group of friends that I came with.

And for this last one to work I have to explain for those unfamiliar with LARP (Live Action Role Playing), specifically for Vampire: The Masquerade and Werewolf: The Apocalypse, when it comes to the use of powers instead of acting things out we use the old Rock, Paper, Scissors technique. So on with the [=CMoF=], a group of us were playing Werewolf, sitting around a fire, at a friends house, which was in a trailer park, and everyone was required to do a check for awareness (an enemy was sneaking up on us). So everyone does the rock paper scissors throw. Cue everyone throwing paper except this troper who threw rock. Note that this troper was the only black player surrounded by a bunch of white people standing with their hands thrown out in front of them, and me with my fist held high. At night. Around a fire. In a trailer park.

This troper had a friend who was renowned for keeping his pockets filled with anything he thought might ever come in handy, as well as a few completely random items. One day, someone jokingly asked this friend if he carried an elephant around too. Cue friend wordlessly fishing in his pocket and pulling out . . . a tiny plastic elephant. It was hilarious.

I am blessed with family and friends who have strong senses of humor and many [=CMoFs=]. My brother and I went with my sister and brother-in-law to an amusement park. One of the roller coasters had a knob in the crotchinal region to hold on to. I said "Grab on to what you hold most dear." Cue my brother-in-law reaching over to grab my sister's chest.

My best friend walked into trig one day and said he was going to turn on his graphing calculator and press enter, which would call up the last entry, and that that would be the meaning in his life. #QUOTE#'''Calculator:''' Hi! I'm your calculator and I hate you.

Unbeknownst to either of us, someone else had programmed it to say that by coincidence.

My brothers and I were watching JP: The Lost World with subtitles (don't know why). #QUOTE#''Helicopters are aproaching Good Guy Base Camp'' #QUOTE#'''Subtitles:''' Low rumbling #QUOTE#'''Kelly Malcolm:''' "What is that?" #QUOTE#'''middle brother:''' "It's low rumbling! Can't you read?"

Easily the funniest thing he has ever said.

When this troper was at a bank to deposit a check, he and the teller had the following exchange: #QUOTE# '''Me:''' I see you've had some security upgrades since the robbery. However, there is one more thing you can do. #QUOTE# '''Teller:''' What's that? #QUOTE# '''Me:''' Arm the employees. #QUOTE# '''Teller:''' What if I have a bad day?

Way back in fourth grade, a classmate of this troper brought the classroom down in an unintentional moment. The teacher had written: "Look at these numbers" and a list of numbers, plus some questions. Halfway through the exercise, the classmate goes: "Teacher, I'm watching the numbers, and nothing's happening to them...". Cue the class laughter.

This troper has had multiple examples of this over the years, but to save space, he'll narrow it down to the one he found the funniest. It happened when I was being forced to watch BarneyAndFriends buy his younger cousin one time. It was torture at first, but then I accidently turned on the closed captioning, which made it much more bearible with how horribly spelled everything was (One that was amusing was "Humpy Dumpt sat on a all, Humpty umpty had a great fa. All the King's hoes and all the King's men coulden't put Hump together again!")

I was telling a joke once, and my friend interrupted by bursting out into fake laughter at the very beginning. I calmly told him, "Fuck off." At which point the entire class started laughing their arses off. They laughed more at that than the joke itself when I finished it.

This troper's friend is fond of OhMyGods, usually with fictional characters she thinks are awesome enough. She's also recently read all of Bleach within a short amount of time and is obsessed with it. Normally when she uses OhMyGods she keeps the 'my' in, but earlier today while we were sitting on the bus she missed out the 'my'. It came out as "Oh Aizen!" An unknown girl sitting behind us continued with "Don't ''stop!''" Unknown girl, on the slight chance that you happen to be reading this, we love you and think you deserve this crown.

My friends and I do this often, obviously. One quote in particular sticks out: "Heat it with fruit power!" (Said by This Troper over the phone to friend while friend was making a veggie burger of all things.)

A while ago in English class, the subject was 'power'. My teacher was talking about how power could be abused, and then she asked for examples concerning herself and a friend of mine. People suggested that my teacher could give my friend extra marks, or not take off marks from work, for example, and then this conversation occurred. #QUOTE# '''Student''': Maybe (Teacher) could ask (friend) to come here, to this room, alone, after school, and- #QUOTE# '''Me''': ''(Student)!'' #QUOTE# '''Entire class''': *cracks up and laughs for ages* #QUOTE# '''Student''' *completely red and embarrassed* : NO! I ''meant'' that (Teacher) could ask her to come here for extra tutoring!

Back in high school, this troper went with a few classmates on a school-funded trip for SAT practice. We stayed at a house our teachers had rented that was right on the beach. During a break, we decided to go down to the shore, and we had found a Frisbee in the garage, so we were tossing that around. At one point, this troper tossed it for a classmate to catch, only to have one of his friends ''throw a rock at the thing and shatter it in mid-flight''.

Here's another one: this troper had some of his friends over for a video gaming session. Somehow, my younger brother is chasing one of my friends around the house. I chased after them to get them to stop, but then my friend runs back into the room everyone else was in and closes the door. My brother, however, was looking over his shoulder at me, so he ran right into the closed door at full speed, resulting in a very loud BANG. Everyone else nearly died of laughter.

Some set up required for this one. In London, where I live, a common slang word is bare (pronounced Bear), meaning a lot of. My friend and I were talking about P2P, and my friend mentioned that one of the upsides of BitTorrent is that you can "download bare shit at the same time." Hilarity ensued.

This is actually a somewhat mean and very juvenile example you'd have to be in high school to find truly funny, but when I was in Biology as a sophomore, we were watching a video on the digestive tract when a kid at the back ripped the loudest, longest fart I've ever heard in my life, and at the end of it muttered, very quietly "Oh no, it squirted." As this kid was the kind of arrogant JerkJock nobody actually liked, this resulted in the entire class cracking up--until the stench literally drove us out of the classroom, it was so horrible. It was one of the inner rooms and so had no windows, and when the teacher opened the door to let it air out, the stink literally ''wafted into the hallway''. For the rest of the year the guy was known as Fartzilla, and was followed everywhere he went by whispers of "Oh no, it squirted". All the kids he'd picked on tended to regard it as a kind of divine LaserGuidedKarma. In a non-mean example, my senior year our high school president's last name was Crowley, which prompted a lot of people to sing the Ozzy song 'Mister Crowley' when he went past (he was a big Ozzy fan, he didn't mind). When his name was called at our graduation ceremony, almost the ''entire class'' started belting it out in chorus. The teachers were pissed, but we loved it.

Said once this troper professor: "Once upon a time, teachers were used to enter in a class met only by mute terror, setting a reign of fear. Now we have to talk with the parents, with the psychologist, and we have to look at the student socioeconomic equilibrium and ''for fuck sake''."

This Italian troper, thanks to Highschool, had to study Leonardo da Vinci in History of Art. The lesson, anyway, was nothing less than classic thanks to a little talk about Leonardo's efforts in cooking. #QUOTE#Prof: "He wrote a book on manners, too. He said that you couldn't talk during dinner or lunch..." #QUOTE#Troper: "Having a personality is ''baaad''." #QUOTE#Prof: [...]"He invented an eolic slice-eggs" #QUOTE#Student: "Eolic slice-eggs?! What the... did he invent a stoning-beans too?!" #QUOTE#Prof: "Yeah, well, you try to invent something!" #QUOTE#Troper: "Can we use ''Hamsters''?" #QUOTE#Student: "My God... the truth is that Leonardo da Vinci works for Ebay!" #QUOTE#Troper: "He's alive and makes knives that slice and dice!" #QUOTE#Prof: *she throws a chalks against my head*

This troper lives near Venice and had once to go there to visit her cousin. She (the troper) hates Venice with passion, but surely the city left some nice memories... #QUOTE#Uncle: "How much will it take from here to the Accademia?" #QUOTE#Barman: "Half a hour, usually." #QUOTE#Uncle: "And if we take a shortcut?" #QUOTE#Barman: "Half an hour, 'cause you'll get lost."

Of course, we did. #QUOTE#Cousin: "Oh, mister? What is the way for the Accademia?" #QUOTE#Mister: "To the right." #QUOTE#Cousin: "Thank you." #QUOTE#Troper: "Yeah yeah. Lady? I'm sorry, what is the way for the Accademia?" #QUOTE#Lady: "To the left." #QUOTE#Troper: "It moves! The city, it moves when you turn your back! [...] Look at this! Look at this! Logic wants that the fastest way from point A to point C is by B, but here? Noooo! The fastest way is DEFGHIYWZ!"

Discussing the future of Venice. #QUOTE#Cousin: "I think I heard, once, a british man asking why we didn't just let the city crumble." #QUOTE#Troper: "The answer is 'because then where would you go on holiday?'"

And now, for something completely different, school! #QUOTE#Troper: "Let's go let's go let's go let's go let's go" #QUOTE#Friend: "Stop running! What's your problem?!" #QUOTE#Troper: "There wasn't a single moment in this morning where my brain wasn't in pure agony! It was a genocide! Innocent brain cells where killed by a psychotic man babbling about ''Cicero''!"

And the last one, this time not really about me but about our professor who had entered the classroom just when we were arguing: he calmed us down and gave us some ideas, ending with this fantastic statement. #QUOTE#"It really isn't that hard, you know, you just have to ask nicely... of course, you'll always make a fuss about everything but that's because you're ''females''."

This troper, two friends and a teacher trying to understand what the hell a monk is. #QUOTE#Friend1: "Yeah, well, monks, they're married to God." #QUOTE#Teacher: "...No." #QUOTE#Troper: "They're divorced!" #QUOTE#Friend2: "They're widowed!" #QUOTE#Troper: "They ended up with house and children thanks to a good lawyer!"

This troper and two of her friends... let's call them Rin and Len... were having a conversation about gay Muppets (don't ask) when this exchange happened: #QUOTE#Len: "What about Elmo?" #QUOTE#Rin: "Elmo's gay too, because he loves Mr. Noodle!... Or maybe he's just bi." #QUOTE#Len: "All bi people love Mr. Noodle!!!" #QUOTE#Me: *hysterical laughter* #QUOTE#Rin: "..." #QUOTE#Len: "Penis, Rin." #QUOTE#Rin: "Oh."

Okay, the fact that you're calling them Rin and Len makes it that much more hilarious.

This troper was watching Shutter with her father in the scene where a woman discovers her husband secretly participated in a rape just as he walks back into their apartment. #QUOTE#Husband: "I brought cheesecake!" #QUOTE#Dad: "Is it rape flavored?"

•This troper has a friend with a heart of gold, but he can be a bit on the slow side. While in the car, driving toward the store, the song "I lean like a Chollo" came on. The following conversation took place, names have been changed to protect the innocent. #QUOTE# Troper: This always bothered me, but wht's a Chollo? #QUOTE# Friend: It's those long pieces of Fried, Mexican bread they sell in the store, covered in sugar. #QUOTE# Troper: *Dead silent* ....That's a CHURRO. #QUOTE# Much laughter ensued.

This following exchange occured in history class, while two of my obnoxious guy friends were fighting over Julius Caesar and whether or not he was a good guy. #QUOTE# Friend One: You know what, he was not a cool dude! #QUOTE# Friend Two: Yes he was! #QUOTE# Teacher: Guys, be quiet. #QUOTE# (something that sounded like, Now those are good weasels. Something similar to that.) #QUOTE# This Troper: Wait, did you just say weasels? #QUOTE# Silence. Teacher begins to break out laughing.

In my defense, this troper was laughing her head off, and did not hear what Friend One really said. To this day it is still a mystery.

Plus this little gem between my friends. They were arguing about who knows what. #QUOTE# Friend 1: Don't blame the Mexican! #QUOTE# Friend 2: Don't blame the white girl!

This troper's uncle was run over by a goat. Run over. By a goat.

Also, this troper once threw her shoe at the floor in frustration, ''missed the floor'', and ''hit her brother in the '''kidney''' with the shoe''. Since he deserved it for making her late to work by stealing said shoe in the first place, this might have been a case of AccidentalAimingSkills.

This troper was filling out summer camp forms, when he and his dad came across this... #QUOTE# Me: "Are you immune to Hepatitis B?" What do they think I'll be doing there?! #QUOTE# Dad: What are you talking about? #QUOTE# Me: Hepatitis is an STD! #QUOTE# Dad: No it isn't. #QUOTE# Me: It's not? Oh.

My brother and sister who had been overhearing this cracked up

This troper was talking with his mother and said "Call me an old timer, but I can't make head or tail out of On Demand. That's a bad sign right there. Seventeen years old and already confused by technology."

This Troper is your average KillerGameMaster. Sometimes, I would give them easier dungeons but they would still take the most blatantly stupid routes they could. End result was me constantly mourning my lack of a Clue Bat. Come Christmastime, one of players gives me a very strangely shaped gift. I unwrap it- it's a baseball bat with a label from a label maker that reads, "Clue Bat". #QUOTE# Me: Aw, Gay Elf, you got me something to hit you with! #QUOTE# Gay Elf: I was rather hoping you would use it on someone that wasn't me.

Google anything you don't get. One day, my friend and I were trying out a text-based Pokemon game in MSN that let us make up Pokemon and Attacks. We played a few times, with me using a Snorunt, Mr. Stabbs, and a DeepCrow. He used a Rotom, a Leafeon, and a Sandslash. For our fourth battle, he decided to use a Pointy Stick while I chose the Blue Badger. This is the entire battle. #QUOTE#Blue Badger: Let's play! *pulls out a gun and uses Bullet To The Face* #QUOTE#Announcer: CRITICAL HIT! ''Blue Badger'' used '''BULLET TO THE FACE'''! ''Pointy Stick'' took '''897''' damage! #QUOTE#Pointy Stick: *One Hit KO'd!* #QUOTE#Quarma: ... #QUOTE#Mike: ...WHAT.

This Troper: Hey that MSN game sounds Interesting, Can i have your Email so I can Tag along? also do you mind if I bring Along two Robots

This Troper had a strange R.E teacher for the last 3 years. He had rather ... weird methods of keeping in control ie. The wig of Shame. It invovled the person who had done something shameful putting on this massive afro wig and the rest of the class pointing at them and saying "Shame!" Another favorite was to make a person go hug a tree. It was hilarious. We liked Mr D, he let us watch cartoons in class and showed us Breakfast Club when we were 12/13.

Same Troper from above. One day myself and a friend were completely hyper, it was a half day and we had left at lunch. This Troper and her friend ended up skipping past our local swimming pool, over a bridge and through a park singing "THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF PANTS!!!" while another friend was behind us facepalming herself and saying "I don't know them, I've never met them in my life before." while we stopped and started hugging her randomly. It was fun.

When I went out camping with my cousins, we somehow(I don't remember how) ended up talking about bad ways to chat up somebody. Since I have incredibly lame humour, I repeated one from a recent commercial("Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?"). Ever since then, the words 'nice shoes' have been a euphemism for wanting to sleep with someone between me and my cousins. Cue me, a few months later, working in my mum's practice(she's a doctor), sorting all the files alphabetically, close to the consulting room. Suddenly, the door of the consulting room opens and an old man walks out of it and says exactly to me... the famous two words, 'nice shoes'. I just... couldn't... stop... laughing...

So. This troper's family has two cars. And the other day one of them broke down. Won' start. won't even turn over. Just like. Dead. So we sigh, and use the other car. This morning. It died the exact same way. cue parents frustrated and somewhat angry. We call our Dad's cousin to tow us, and we reach the repair shop. we pile into the cousin's truck for the ride home. His car also refuses to start. We sit there for a half second. Then our cousin and the rest of us simultaneously start laughing our asses off. (just so nobody worries, his car did start after that. but the moment was damned funny)

This troper was getting involved in a fight between two of my brothers, and one of them yelled "You stay out of this!" Troper walked two feet to just outside the room. He then rejoined - "THAT'S NOT FUNEE-HEE-HEE..."! You probably had to be there.

This troper had a Humanities teacher who let us watch movies every Friday and was very lenient about the content of the films. One day we were watching Resident Evil: Extinction, and this usually meek troper surprised herself by making an entire room full of mostly minority students laugh by yelling, "No, don't go in there! the black guy always gets killed first!" when he African-American guy stupidly walks into a creepy dark room alone.

This troper was once an (outwardly) shy, naive 19-year-old shopgirl called, oh, "Elise." (Name changed to protect the snarky.) One very busy, hectic evening, a customer (flirty, God's-Gift-to-Shopgirls kind of guy), read my nametag, gave a big, cheesy grin, and asked loudly, "Oh, is your name pronounced ''ell-LEECE?''" I kept my "pleasant" expression on and said, "No, actually, it's spelled ''Elise,'' but it's pronounced ''throat-warbler-mangrove.''" (...I then discovered exactly what a "frozen smile" looks like...)

It was my very first successful "zing," ''ever''. And I had MontyPythonsFlyingCircus to thank for it! (I only steal from the best.) The really amazing thing to me at the time was that I both A) thought of using the line on the spot with no preparation, and B) managed to keep a straight face while doing it (at least until I ducked into another section...where my assistant manager was having quiet hysterics. Luckily, he was also a Python fan).

This troper's sister was doing a movie for a girl scouts project, and she needed to use a banana as a prop. She removed the ''Chiquita'' sticker from the banana, leading my mom to say, "I think ''Chiquita'' has better things to do than sue a pair of girl scouts." Then I interjected "Yeah, like overthrow the government of Guatemala"

This Troper was playing DungeonsAndDragons. We were in a dungeon fighting a stone golem, which was awoken (from being a statue) by the party's gnome throwing some blood on it. Somehow, we took this to mean it was a vampire stone golem. Our Cleric decided to cast the spell Daylight on it to see if it was affected. Being behind the golem, he reached out and made its ass glow. I quipped, "I guess you can't call it ''Where The Sun Don't Shine'' then." The battle was stopped for the next five minutes due to laughing...

Nice one, dude! You have my respect.

Why crowning moment is one time, I was sitting at a dinner table with my family, eating. My little brother said that his teacher taught him he couldn't subtract 5 frtom 3. I said "HOLD IT!" and said that that was incorrect. He said OBJECTION! And said that I was wrong, and while he did I looked up a problem like 5 minus 3 on Google. I said TAKE THAT! and showed him the problem, and we returned to eating. It was never spoken of again.

One time, our community theater group was doing ''JosephAndTheAmazingTechnicolorDreamcoat''. So, it's hell week, we're all getting a bit punchy. This troper played Potiphar, whose wife was fooling around with the title character. At one point, after catching the two of them together, I sang the line "Joseph, I'll see you rot in jail / The things you have done are beyond the pale!" My entrance comes, I pull my wife away and sing, "Joseph, I'll see you rot in jail / Get your stinkin' hands off my wife's tail!" The director made me do it over.

In Core Humanities 203, we got our midterm assignment, a monstrous 3600-word paper that we had a week to do. The professor, irritated that his students were notoriously poor at properly putting cover pages on their papers, devoted 15 minutes to explaining the format, saying on five separate occasions "and don't forget to put your class section and time on the cover page. What do I want on the cover page? The class time and section. I can't stress this enough. CLASS TIME AND SECTION." Finally, after explaining the rest of the assignment, he said "are there any questions?" Cue my hand going up and saying: "Just one minor technical question." "Yes?" "Did you want the class time and section on the cover page?" The reaction from the professor was epic. He just looked down at the floor, slowly shook his head...and the class just lost it.

For this troper, it was during archery class. We (Me and C) were having trouble deciding what my arrow scored (2 or 3) so we called in another person (G), who had been scoring a five spot. #QUOTE#G: It look's like a four to me. #QUOTE#C: Four? #QUOTE#G: Oh, sorry, I was just scoring a five spot... #QUOTE# Me: But I'll gladly accept it.

And then when I woke up late one morning after a strange dream: #QUOTE#Mom: So why'd you sleep in so late? #QUOTE#Me: I don't know, although my dream last night gave me an idea of just how screwed up my subconscious is. #QUOTE#Mom: How? #QUOTE#Me: I now feel guilty about eating Easter candy.

This troper's grandfather was a source of many of these. When he was a boy during the great depression, his family lacked plumbing and had to use an outhouse. His oldest brother improvised by cutting a hole into the wall next to his bed to use as a urinal. One night, my grandfather cut off the foot of a chickenhawk they had killed earlier and by yanking on a severed tendon, was able to make it clasp and release it's talons. He then waited outside the hole until his brother used it. He yanked on the tendon, causing the foot to grab his brother's "member". The brother apparently thought it was the family cat, and began talking to it. #QUOTE#Older Brother: * Eeyyiie! Shoo cat! #QUOTE#My grandfather yanked it tighter) #QUOTE#Older Brother: Kitty... #QUOTE#(Yanked again) #QUOTE#**&#^@^#@* &#@$ CAT! I'll **** ing choke you to death! My grandfather then let go of the severed foot and ran back inside.

On another occasion, he and a coworker rode tricycles through the Abestos plant they worked at wearing nothing but paper sacks on their heads.

Near the end of this lurker's cast party, the hostess, R, called us all together so we could watch M recieve a present, because she expected M's reaction to be hilarious. It wasn't as all she did was smile while abotu a dozen people stared at her, waiting for something to happen. R's present was a box of chocolate, which is a special occasion because we never let M have sugar, since it turns her into TheScrappy. Then M tried to open the box. #QUOTE#Four or five people, this lurker included: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

This troper was in Government class, where we had to do a project on landmark Supreme Court cases. The lights were dim and we were all getting sleepy. Someone went up for his project, and we weren't paying much attention until, at the same time, everyone looked at the top of the page. It said "WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!" in all caps, and ''everyone'' started laughing.

My sisters (Younger and older) were arguing, younger said something and then older walked over and, after a moment, gave this HUGE burp that shook the couch a bit that was directed directly at younger, blew it at her to drive the point home, and walked back to her sewing project. And then we get this gem: #QUOTE# Younger: I, I think I just died inside a little bit. #QUOTE# Older: (Pumps arm triumphantly) Score!

I had a talk with my mom a few months back and somewhere in the middle of the conversation I told her that "I'm too soft to enlist in the military". My mom then walks right behind me, grabs my stomach and starts ''jiggling'' my belly fat while saying "sooooooooffffft" in a really weird voice. I was literally rolling on the floor laughing after she let go.

This wheelchair-bound troper was waiting for the elevator in school with a friend who's arm had been hurting. This exchange took place. #QUOTE# Friend: Man, what's wrong with my arm? #QUOTE# Me: I don't know. What's wrong with my legs? #QUOTE# Nearby Teacher: *raucous laughter* #QUOTE# Friend: Shut up!

This troper wishes this was her story, but it unfortunately belongs to her brother (but he doesn't go on TV Tropes, so it's free game). One day, in her brother's class (this being a class of 8th graders), two of his friends (let's call them Ess and Tee) were arguing about something or another. Tee called Ess a dildo (or something to that effect). Ess, being notoriously naive and innocent, didn't understand what a dildo was. Jokingly, Tee told him to ask the class druggie, Jay (also an alias) what it was. Ess took the suggestion seriously and asked Jay. Nonchalantly, Jay replies "your mother's favourite toy". Ess still didn't get it. Everyone in the viscinity ''did'' and subsequently burst out laughing.

This troper once had a very good friend in Theater class who was an amazing actor. For the end of the class, we were all called upon to write our own versions of the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet in modern english, then two people would get different scripts and try to make them fit together. Well, this troper's friend came around. He took one look at his script, and promptly tossed it away, deciding to improv the entire balcony scene '''in ebonics.''' Everyone wanted him to stop, including the teacher but we were all to busy falling out of our seats laughing. Some highlights include: #QUOTE#'''Juliet:''' Hey Romeo, you had better watch out for my father's men! #QUOTE#'''Romeo:''' Ain't nothin', baby; I'm bulletproof, yo. #QUOTE#'''Juliet:''' Please, take me away from this place my dear, sweet Romeo! #QUOTE#'''Romeo:''' Yo, baby, what you say we hop in my 'Rida and cruise around my 'hood? You'd be da best lookin ho around dat place.

While not especially funny per say, it was one of those moments when I finally (after about eight or nine years of trying and failing) made someone laugh with the intention of doing so (my sense of humour is best summed up as crap). Me, my dad and my stepmother were sitting eating dinner (I wasn't particularly hungry, so I had two small salami sandwiches) when I realised how quiet it was, so I said "It's quiet...too quiet." I then shrugged and took a large bite out of my sandwich. The fact I normally start off a boring conversation about film lines with this comment made it particularly memorable, but the fact I showed no interest in the silence made it surprisingly epic (also, I had just finished watching the Doctor Who episode, "The Time of Angels", so silence felt bad: seriously, you try watching it without being unnerved). Also, earlier in said dinner, my dad (who was trying to half a very reluctant bun: he had decided to follow my lead for dinner for some reason) muttered that it wouldn't go, to which I said, in a rather deadpan voice, "It's a matter of loaf and death". What made it funny in hindsight was I was trying to refer to the Wallice and Gromit short of the same name rather than trying to tell a joke about bread!

This troper was talking with his Dad. Dad was talking about how the ash cloud was going to go over England. I chimed in with "not that they'll notice the difference"

This troper's friend was playing the song "London Underground" during an minor argument two members of my club were having. At the end of the argument, one of them pointed at himself. Unfortunately, he did so just as the final word, "arsehole", was audiable. Hilarity ensured (yes, we all have an odd sense of humour).

My friend takes a sign language class and is stressing about her exam. The other day she said 'AH! I'm going to fail. All I know is; DOG! *action* CAT! *action* FOX *action* ' The expression on her face (think someone eating something sour) and the fact that this LITERALLY came out of nowhere had me laughing for at least 5 minutes.

This troper has a couple, both are puns.

My friend and I were playing SuperSmashBros Brawl one day when I picked Link and he picked Toon Link. I got the final smash and when I caught him in it near the edge of the stage, I said "you are the weakest link, goodbye". and my friend cracked up.

this happened during History when we were learning 20's slang and it turned out one of the words was 'John' (which means both toilet and was my name) and every douche in the rome was making bad puns, such as "I'm going to go to the John now!" or "Hey the John won't flush!" when my friend made a joke. #QUOTE#'''friend:''' Ya know, I think I know why they're making these jokes about you #QUOTE#'''me''' (getting sick of the bastardized punnery) why? #QUOTE#'''friend''' Because for some reason you always take their shit. #QUOTE#'''me''' *bursts out laughing*

My brother and I recieved Wii Music as a gift, and we were about to go through the whole list of instruments in the game. We happened to have a Mii of our bald, sunglasses-wearing marching band director, so we used him as a guinea pig for showing off all the instruments. It started fairly innocently, but suddenly the instrument became "Cheerleader", which placed the band director in a cheerleader's outfit. About half an hour of raucus laughter ensued. The same thing occured for "Dog Suit" and "Rapper".

After running the mile, this troper was asked how he was doing. He replied "I feel like my heart is boxing with my adam's apple, but otherwise I'm fine"

This troper was participating in an online RP featuring an unbelievably annoying GodModeSue who refused to take the hint about keeping his powers (of which there were more every time) down. Comes the time of the epic final battle... And through some sort of divine intervention, he missed the whole thing, from FaceHeelTurn to GainaxEnding to massive fight sequence in between. What really took the cake is that he showed up ''after'' and declared he had killed every remaining {{Mook}} on the field with his latest power.

This troper has quite a few:

When watching a video for Tenacious D, she heard JB and said that it stood for Jack Black. This troper's sister, who had seen themovie TenaciousDAndThePickOfDestiny a week before, said "Oh! So that's what JB stands for!"

Then there was a horse show just a year before where one of this Tropers friends went berserk and ran around hitting people with a giant, inflatable hammer for no reason whatsoever.

And, finally, in this troper's Chamber Choir class, she and two of her friends were talking about differences in dialect ("water" and "woter" in this case). One of the friends started talking about how people in New Orlean's said "water" and not "Woter" and began saying it was in the southwest... and not south of Missouri where we live. Considering the fact that this friend is a senior, it was hilarious while this troper and her other friend tried to tell her Louisiana was south of Missouri. To make it even better, towards the end of the argument, the friend who was geographically challenged went and sat on the back of the other friend who was laying on the floor, just about dead (not really).

My Friend is an idiot, and one day me and him got into a conversation about computers. So he says right out of the blue, "Ya know, they got computers really well made since 1995, when the FIRST computer was made," I paused, stunned, horrified, I twitched hard, and I calmly told him my breif history on computers (I'm a fucking NERD to shit like that, so when my friends start talking about shit they THINK they know about when they don't) and he gave me that look that said "Jesus christ don't piss him off" his facial expression said EVERYTHING

Anime Expo 2007, this troper and a friend being idots didn't pre-reg and thus had to wait in that immensely long ass line that everyone who was there remembered. So during this we did nothing but sing songs to kill time when in a moment of brilliance he decided to mix Bleach and "A Pirates Life for Me". We finished the song there and had everyone dying but the true CMOF came while we were near I took his cane and busted out with my own rendition of "I Have a Dream" and I had the entire crowd going by the time I said "I have a dream that little white children, and black children, and asian children, and little Mexican children, and Narutards, and Uraharatards will one day go together into the con for glory..." at this point I slam down on the cane and it just breaks off at the handle. I just stare at it and just roll out with "And I have a dream...that there will be a place with some wood glue so I can fix this cane." For AX2008...I was the one who came up with what is now known as "The Cake Joke".

This tropers story happened while he was sitting in English. A classmate (who is my kind of friend: for the story to work, you need to know he has a deep, deadpan voice which makes it hard to hear him talk normally) was feeling pretty bad (I suspect he had got drunk the previous night) and, during the lesson, the class next door was playing a film very loudly, so the teacher told my classmate (who I shall call "James" to spare the innocent) to tell the class next door to turn the volume down. "James", probably due to not listening as well as a combination of the possiblity of being hungover, said something alone the lines of "I don't have notes on those, I'll get them out my bag." For about fifteen seconds, no one was able to point out his mistake due to laughter. Even the teacher, who has a rarely used sense of humour, was laughing.

Another one I just remembered. Back when we were studying Death of a Salesman, we were asked to draw a stage diagram of how we would lay out the stage for a production. One person (not "James") drew an actual apron on his stage diagram (he hadn't studied drama and, as such, didn't know that the apron of the stage was the front of the stage). Hilarity ensured.

This troper's AP calculus teacher had taken a classmate's phone away for using it in class, and offered to return it back to him if he came back to get it after school. However, he forgot to. The next time we had class, she had given his phone back to him in a small, neatly-wrapped box, complete with a bow. He tore off the paper to find the box also wrapped in a layer of duct tape, which took a while to remove. He then opened the box, took out a bunch of paper wads used for padding, and found his phone... covered in multiple layers of masking tape. Cue laughter and screams of agony that could be heard outside the classroom.

This troper was in geography class when the teacher put on video explaining the water cycle. The video had an incredibly annoying and childish song describing the cycle. The video ended and after 2 seconds of silence, this troper said, "Well, I'll never sleep again. Cue the entire class erupting in laughter.

This troper asked for autographs from a few teachers of her school. Results?

A History teacher stared at the pen, stared at the paper, stared at the troper, and asked "You're going to steal half my soul, aren't you?"

Another History teacher said "With that and 5 bucks, you can buy a lot of Coke and still have spare money."

Yet another History teacher asked "You'll sell it to the Devil, won't you?"

ThisTroper was playing SuperSmashBrothers (That game generates ''a lot'' of funny moments) with her [=MSTie=] family, with this troper playing as {{Sonic}} and her brother playing as Meta Knight. Meta Knight landed a perfect hit and sent Sonic flying off the stage. This Troper used Sonics' up special attack to get back up on to the stage (for those who don't know, it involves pulling a giant spring from nowhere to hurl yourself upwards). What did my brother say? #QUOTE#''Brother: NOOOOOOOOO SPRINGS!'' #QUOTE# Sonic gets slashed off stage into oblivion #QUOTE# I have never laughed so hard in my life, ''I nearly passed out''. The best part? HE'S SEVEN YEARS OLD!

This year in lit class, my teacher was asking us if we had any word examples for the prefix anthro-. Well, I spouted a word that made everyone, including the teacher, look at me like I was speaking Greek. Anthropophagus. It means man-eater.

Alpha}} This troper had one with a role-playing game session, where the GM was giving us an overview of the different civilizations he'd created for our setting. In one such culture, he mentioned an "embarrassing" religious conflict between two deities, a goddess of the harvest and a goddess of "cold and decay." One of the other players took the term "embarrassing" as a reference to the deities, rather than the conflict itself. And so this exchange took place: #QUOTE#'''Friend:''' No, I thought you meant embarrassing like one's the goddess of, like, the harvest and bowel irritation, and the other's the goddess of the cold and dudes taking it up the butt. #QUOTE#*''Everyone around the table laughs, and just when we're done, I add:''* #QUOTE#'''Me:''' "Hail [second goddess's name], Goddess of Winter and Sodomy!" #QUOTE#*''Cue fresh round of laughter''*

And since we were playing another RPG based off of ASongOfIceAndFire, the joke gave us a whole new meaning to the line, "''Winter Is Coming''."

This Troper had one when he was sitting through his 2D animation class. I, alongside my class, were listening to our tutor explain things we already knew, when she asked us : #QUOTE#"How many frames are there in 1 second?" Now, my entire class are a bunch of jokers, and soon we were spouting random numbers pulled from thin air. Then, I have an idea. I simply yell : #QUOTE#"OVER NINE THOUSAND" The only other gamer in my class and I share a high-five and lots of chuckles.

This troper and her siblings were playing "Scene it" one evening. When her six-year-old sister had to answer a trivia question, She made one up; "What disney movie stars five naked guys?" The little sister's guess? "Holes." No one could stop laughing for the next half hour. The best part was that the sister didn't understand why that was so funny.

This Troper was ina production of Peter Pan, complete with flying harnesses and the lot. So fastforward to the first show, at the moment when Peter and the children are flying around there room and he dramatically flys up and points offstage saying "This way to Neverland!" Well, he was spinning. No one could stay in character.

This Troper usually arrives at school really early. So, one day, because she had TOO MUCH STUFF with her, she had to pause for a moment to reorganize everything so that she could open doors... Well, she heard her friend (who is usually very sensible) singing Space Taxi. This Troper was trying not to burst out laughing, so she was shuddering, then got pissed off, because she dropped the bag dontaining a clay thing, which broke, so went in and yelled at the person singing Space Taxi, who looked extremely confused.

Some night when this troper where on a class trip we stayed in a holiday complex and it was a little late and I saw two girls going on the pavement a few steps away. Suddendly somebody sprang out of the bush right next to the pavement, just in time not to collide with the girls, and ran along. The exchange of the girls: Girl1: Did you see that? Girl2: NO!

In case you read the Crowning Moments of Awesome Troper Tales, this was the exact same guy who played real-life Metal Gear Solid with the teachers.

This troper has found in his half-century or so of so-called life that the funniest lines often come not from scriptwriters or gifted comedians, but in the spontaneous CMOF utterances of everyday individuals. Two come to mind:

In a small company I once worked for, there were two employees who consistently dragged the entire enterprise down -- ignorant, lazy, and worthless individuals. Our boss, who was a somewhat senile old codger (he was also the owner, so his word was gospel) one day let everyone know that he would soon be trimming the staff in the interest of cost and efficiency. We all assumed he would be pruning those two aforementioned dead branches, and that he did. BUT he ALSO simultaneously fired a woman who was clearly the smartest, most productive employee we had! That day at lunch, we were discussing this and trying to make sense of it, when our receptionist chimed in with, "Hell, that's like firing Moe, Larry, and Einstein!"

Not heard firsthand, but related to me by a friend...in a New York City deli, as the TV on the wall was droning on with wall-to-wall coverage of Ronald Reagan's marathon country-crossing multiple memorial services, one grizzled local, tired of the endless spectacle, loudly muttered, "Jesus, this fucker's been more places dead than I've been alive!" This very non-jewish troper met with a jewish friend in the halls at school, when she said "sup jew"! so, naturally, this black troper responded "sup ni** er". A friend who heard this started laughing, and said "ha! it's funny because SHE'S jewish and YOUR a nig- i mean bl-.... African American". to add some sight into this, i'm not even american

This troper is hanging out with some friends (two guys and a girl) in the auditorium rafters during play rehearsal. I go down for a little bit then go back up. I casually announce my return with 'All right, everyone, put your clothes back on.' At that exact time, the girl was about to toss her bra down into the seats.

This troper was waiting in the car outside Wal-Mart late one night, waiting for her mother to come out. There were two guys, store employees, outside, putting the carts away. And singing The Lion Sleeps Tonight at each other. At the top of their lungs. While running around with the carts. This troper had to unbuckle so she could turn around and watch them.

Doubles as CrowningMomentOfAwesome, but while playing a card game, one particularly obnoxious player kept talking shit at the same time, and focused on a guy, who had been knocked out, who had to leave. After some arguing, he bet the player that he would lose, and they put 5 pounds on it. One round later, he was knocked out (Before I was) and laughed out the room.

This troper's family just got a brand new refrigerator yesterday, and her mom was using the ice dispenser on the refrigerator door for the first time. After waiting for the ice to come out of the dispenser for about two minutes (the refrigerator was just making strange rumbling noises), mom got annoyed and opened the refrigerator door to see what was wrong. As soon as she opened the door, a ''ton'' of ice fell out of the refrigerator. She then started to close the door and ''that's'' when the ice started coming out of the dispensor.

About a week after my birthday party, my dad, brother, and I were sitting around the house waiting for my mom to get home so we could all have dinner. Quite randomly, we decided to pop the rubber/latex/whatever balloons and then we came upon the foil one. My dad pointed out that making helium voices was really, really fun back in the day and started to demonstrate as my brother and I stood around slack-jawed. It was awesome and, eventually, we all ended up laughing so hard we couldn't breathe.

Fairly minor, but, considering we were making (actually making, not reading the script for) a (reasonably serious) play best summed up as Cinderella meets Britains Got Talent, worthy of note. Just before the competition started, the herald said, after a drum roll, "I don't wanna be shot." This was so funny that the director kept it in the show. Unfortunately, we only had one performance...and he forgot the line (because the drummer forgot the drum roll). Sadly, it was the best line in the whole show, but we at least got a local rock band to play The Foo Fighters song "The Pretender", which was easily the Crowning Music of Awesome for the whole show (although Knights of Cydonia came close: also performed by the same band). Plus, we had to make the play in 24 hours, so it wasn't exactly expected to be fantastic. This troper has two that occurred during her College-Level English class back in 12th grade.

First one happened on the way back from a field trip. The bus is about to pull into the street and the driver jokingly says "Hold on to your dentures!" Bus pulls out over a bump, causing bus to rock and a student to yell out "My dentures!" Que laughter.

Second happened after a trip to the local sewage treatment plant (the class was a themed seminar, and the theme was environmentalism) and the class was trying to write a thank you note for ####, the sewage treatment worker that gave us the tour. One student makes a comment that "#### doesn't take crap from anyone." This resulted in much laughter and the teacher stating "Well, the bar has been set."

A short one, but this troper was playing Jedi Academy (Not the same troper as the ones who posted the earlier two [=CMoFs=] involving this game), and was walking out onto a ledge. A Dark Jedi mook lept up onto the platform, drew his lightsaber, said 'PrepareToDie, Jedi'...followed immediately by 'Aaaaaarrgghh...!' as he misstepped and fell to his death. Didn't even have to draw my saber.

This webcam picture. Just look here Be warned: that which can be seen cannot be unseen. Now proceed.

Latest [=CMoF=] is when my little sister, whom I am beginning despise a little, noted that the night sky is black (Duh. CaptainObvious is usually played by me, but I'm not that dumb!) I turned from the window, did quie an epic KubrickStare over my glasses and stated "LIKE YOUR SOUL." She started to whinge. *facepalm* DethroningMomentOfSuck minutes later when I tripped on my pajamas and went wheeling into a closed glass door and ended up crying, but hey...

This troper managed to red face one of his friend's brother. I was having dinner with my friend who goes to school out of town, and he brought his girlfriend with her. Because they're SickeninglySweethearts, they tend to do cutesy things all the time. This time, they were doing '''"hi!"''' ''"hi!"'' '''"hi!"''' ''"hi!"'' '''"hi!"''' ''"hi!"'' '''"hi!"''' ''"hi!"''... routine. After half a minute of this, this inspires me to quote ''{{Futurama}}'', "Oh my, it appears she's stuck in an infinite loop, and he's a moron!". While I found it funny (alright, hilarious), the others were almost falling off their chairs.

I ran a ''DresdenFiles'' RPG Christmas game. We worked in as many Christmas references as we could, had to save Christmas by rescuing Santa, and near the end all the attacks would be said along with rhymes. Stuff like "Your will is strong, but your spirit is unwilling, so surrender now lest I get with the killing", "You're fought with power, but all is not well, goodnight to you, I'll see you in Hell", and when one player confronted Santa about a bad Christmas he had, Santa's reply "I'm sorry my son, if this explanation seems lazy, for that was the year, that Santa Went Crazy.

I saw a youtube comment regarding the Watson Jeopardy game that amused me: "At least he didn't ask 'Where is Sarah Connor'".

Maybe it's just me, but five minutes ago I was on the page for Blatant lies, and at the top of the page was a big banner ad for Plenty Of Fish.Com, declaring that I can 'meet plenty of single men in my community online'....And of course right beneath it read 'Blatant Lies', so I wound up laughing pretty hard at that one.

In grade 9 Christian Studies we were learning about how Muslims and Jews believe in the same God as Christians. We had been learning about food webs in Biology 5 minutes previously. When the teacher drew up a diagram with an arrow pointing from 'God' to 'Muslims' and 'Jews' someone yelled "So does that mean that God eats the Muslims and the Jews?' The entire class cracked up, including out teacher. This is one of many Grade 9 Biology incidents.

Second CMOF of Grade 9 Bio: This kid was paying absolutely no attention, and when the teacher asked him a question he attempted (and failed) to BS his way through an answer. Our teacher proceeded to pick up his textbook and (lightly) whack him over the head with it. A few minutes later after we'd all calmed down, some other kid got in trouble for talking instead of working. And then he tried to argue with the teacher that he was working. Our teacher then said to the girl sitting next to him "I don't want to walk all the way over there, so could you hit him for me?" She responded rather enthusiastically, as did several others at that table, who helped her hold him down.

Third CMOF of Grade 9 Bio: #QUOTE# '''Mr. Hayes''' Robert, stop hitting on Megan and start working unless you want my foot up your rear. #QUOTE# '''Megan''' Eww! He is not hitting on me! Besides, I already have a boyfriend. #QUOTE# '''Mr. Hayes''' Fine then. Robert, stop muzzling in on Megan's boyfriend and start working. #QUOTE# This was amusing to everyone present because the thought of Megan and Robert as a couple seemed hilarious. About 3 weeks later they started going out and are still together 3 years later.

In my grade 8 SOSE class we were studying tectonic plates, the different layers of the Earth etc. The annoying kid in class asked if it were possible to tunnel directly through the centre of the Earth to the other side. The teachers said 'no, you would get incinerated.' The kid then said, 'What if you completely encased yourself in a giant ice cube and rolled it through?' Everyone started laughing. To make it even funnier, the teacher then said "Nathan, I offically limit you to three questions per lesson. That way, you can have two serious questions and one stupid question per lesson, or around the other way if you so wish. And no, you may not ask anyone else to voice your stupid questions for you."

Grade 11 Bio. We were canoeing across a dam taking light readings and depth measurements as we went. Someone dropped some equipment over the side. So they jumped in to get it back. After surfacing, he started to yell "Holy sh-", looked around to see teachers watching and changed it to: "Holy expletive, that's cold!"

At a sleepover we were playing Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Kiss, Love or Torture. A guy forgot/mixed up a couple and changed it to "Truth, Dare, Double Kiss, Love or... Sex. With a...tree."

The same guy at his speech applying for school captain: "I'm sure most of you know me as a clown, and expect me to be standing here today with a ready supply of jokes, and perhaps a funny hat. Well, this is the closest I could get. *picks up the school hat and puts it on* *later on in the speech* ...this is the face of a guy who was up til 1am searching for a funny hat." The deadpan monotone he delivered this in made it 10 times funnier.

One of my guy friends was being annoying and and one of my girl friends smacked him in the arm. He said 'violent woman!' but it sounded like he said 'why am I a woman?' It was funny if you were there, trust me.

Something funny happened (that was so overshadowed by the following moment that I can't even remember what it was) and everyone was laughing except one very serious guy. He then said in a perfect deadpan: "That was exceedingly funny." We all cracked up so hard we were almost on the floor and he was still standing there looking only mildly amused at everyone's reaction.

In my Home Ec clase, a cop car drove past the window. We began joking speculating about who it was there to arrest. Our teacher said with a completely straight face: "Well, they can't be here for me; the school doesn't know my real name."

In Modern History we were supposed to be acting out a short skit outlining immigration protocols of the early 20th Century in Australia, i.e. no non-white people allowed in. The first part of the demonstration went fine (keep in mind that this was almost completely unprepared) where the customs immigration guy lets a white guy in with no hassle. The second and third bits (where non-whites were supposed to be denied entry) went slightly less according to plan and a lot funnier. #QUOTE# '''Spencer:''' "Hi Jacky." #QUOTE# *beat as he realises he's not supposed to know his name yet* #QUOTE# '''Spencer''' Er, I mean... who are you? #QUOTE# *Jacky hits Spencer over the head with the piece of paper he's holding* #QUOTE# '''Spencer''' That's actually a federal offence, but anyway, moving on... #QUOTE# *next person walks up, introduction go fine, and then...* #QUOTE# '''Spencer''' I'll let you in if you can write 50 words of English. #QUOTE# '''Josh''' *writes* I don't like this class anymore. #QUOTE# '''Well, since you don't know your lines, I'm afraid I can't let you in. Then again, I don't know my lines either, so I'll just show myself out. * mimes jumping into the ocean and swimming away back to his desk. The fourth and fifth immigrants then (whilst humming Mission Impossible theme music) leapt over the the immigration desk and pretended to invade Australia.

A case of extreme 'you had to be there' but I shall relay it anyway. Two of my friends have constant 'yo momma' battles, which go to ridiculous heights, such as 'So's yo momma's face' 'so's yo face's momma' 'so's yo momma's face's cat' 'so's yo momma's cat's face' fridge's shirt!' and so on and so on adding things until the can't remember what they were saying anymore. On one such an occasion, the bell for the end of lunch rang, which prompted my friend to end this with: "Oh yeah? Well, I've got math next...with, yo momma!" Now, she only said this without thinking because she couldn't think of anything better and it was time to go to class. It took several seconds for any of us, including the person who said it to realise that this was actually a true statement. Her opponents' mother actually is her math teacher, which she did indeed have next. After a good 5 seconds of complete silence, we all started cracking up.

One of my friends tried to say "I've got Biology now" but it came out as I've got Bitrology now." One of my other friends immediately added: "So do I. Now, let us go forth and commence the study of the bisexual tripods."

*In the building called 'CG' standing right in front of the classroom labelled '6'* #QUOTE# '''Blonde''' "Which one is CG6?" #QUOTE# '''Teacher''' "Perhaps it's the one with the 6 over the door."

#QUOTE# '''Friend 1''' *looking at a list of microbes* Why isn't cancer there? #QUOTE# *beat* #QUOTE# '''Friend 2''' Maybe because cancer is not a microbe?

Randomly, in the middle of an awkward silence, my friend suddenly yells "I keep forgetting; is pregnancy 9, or 18 months?" *Several minutes of hysterical laughter later* "No, seriously, I don't know! Tell me!" She was 16. We've never let her forget it.

Second blonde moment for this friend. A few weeks later she randomly turns to me and says "Bill Clinton is the President, right?" I just stared at her for several seconds. "Oh, right! It's George Bush!" More incredulous staring. "What?... What?!... Oh. It's Barack Obama isn't it?" I nod slowly. "Shut. Up."

A guy walks in 20 minutes late to class with no explantion for why he is late. He just looks at the teacher, nods and says "Nice to see you" and walks over to his desk and sits down. Everyone is staring at him in silence. A few seconds later "Nice to see you. Realy, that's all I've got. I'm sorry, I really don't have anything else." He didn't get in trouble.

There's this teacher who is really strict about PDA on school grounds, and she'd just busted my friend and his girlfriend for kissing. So, my friend and his male friend decide to pretend to make out right in front of this teacher's office window. This escalated to the point of them being slammed right up against her window, practically dry humping each other, and moaning/screaming in a generally exaggerated and hilarious manner. The teacher yelling at them made it even funnier, because there was nothing she could do, as they hadn't really broken any school rules.

This troper went to a regional showing of AvenueQ at a theater that served food right to your table/seat. A waiter drops a tray and instead of swearing the guy simply yells out "Hamburgers!". That alone wouldn't be enough but the fact that this happened right before the song ''Schadenfreude'' which includes the lyrics: "Dya ever clap when a waitress falls and drops a tray of glasses?" made it funny as hell.

This one time, I woke up late and I couldn't find a pair of matching socks, so I picked two different ones and wore them for the ''whole day''.

Zat isht nat funny!!!

Note that this story was told to me by my mom about her friend's brothr (Lets call him A). A was driving on his way to a business meating and got into a minor accident with another car. The driver of the other car happened to be a midget, and went up to A's car and said "I'm not happy." A's response? "Then which one are you?". The midget ended up beating the crap out of him.

This Troper was playing upwords (a bit like scrabble, if you didn't know) and, at the end of every word placed, I had letter combinations that...well, lets put it this way: every letter that is hard to think of a word with, I managed to get at least once a draw. Clearly Douglas Adams runs my universe...

Whenever this troper swears, it is generally found to be funny due to his upper class accent (which he has a habit of dropping into quite a lot: he is not actually from an upper class family, just good with old fashioned accents).

This troper and her 11-year old brother are both very geeky, spending alot of time watching videos on {{That Guy With The Glasses}} and such. One movie we both like to make fun of or make reference to frequently is Tommy Wiseau's {{The Room}}. Everytime my brothers school does a play, I always say before "You should totally just randomly add in *Insert obscure geeky reference here* at some point" but he never does. The evening before his most recent school play I said "You should throw in some random Tommy Wiseau dialogue! I would PAY YOU to do that", He says okay, but I didn't expect him to do it. But at the end of one of his scenes he randomly yelled "YOU'RE TEARING ME APART!" And made his entrance to another scene by going "I AM THE GENIE OF THE LA--Oh hai Alladin!". It completely threw all the other children off. I doubt any other parents or siblings in the room got the joke, but it had me rolling.

One of my crowning moments (which was pretty damn embarrassing too) happened on a bus on my way to see Eclipse with some friends (I really did not want to do that). Some girls were sitting next to my friends, and they got up, leaving one of their Oyster Cards on the seat accidentally. Being the perfect gentleman I am, I thought I'd run down and give it back to her. Unfortunately, I didn't think how legging it towards someone and jumping down to the deck with a loud thump would turn out. The worse part? She was facing away from me and the loud noise my trainers made as they impacted with the floor combined with my sudden presence must've made her think I was going to 'get' her somehow. (This, by the way, was in broad daylight.) This made her scream. Even the other passengers were laughing as my friends and I slowly turned crimson, them with laughter, me with embarrassment.

One morning when this tropette was taking longer than usual in the shower, her mother left a passive-aggressive (well, more passive than aggressive) note for her on the computer: #QUOTE#''Even though you use up all the hot water, I still love everything about you''

Today at assembly our principal gave a long winded speech about how we should strive to be more polite by greeting other students and teachers when we walk by more often. Cue practically every person in the school, including a lot of teachers, mocking the ever-living shit out of this by offering ridiculously over-enthusiastic greetings, complete with maniacal grinning, nodding and sincere handshaking to every single person who came within 5 metres of them.

My grandpa's Crowning Moment occurred when my grandma kept harassing my cousin: #QUOTE#Grandma: Do you want some cookies? #QUOTE#Cousin: No thanks. #QUOTE#Grandma: Do you want anything to eat? #QUOTE#Cousin: No thanks, I'm full. #QUOTE#Grandma: Are you sure? #QUOTE#Grandpa: Didn't you hear the girl? She's full. F-U... L-L.

This Troper knows various [=CMOFs=] involving her friends, because my cricle of friends is... ''that'' kind of friendship, but one in particular stands out the most.My InsufferableGenius friend was looking at a pill, a kind of medication that is famous for its effervescence (Sonrisal, I'm Brazilian by the way).One of my other friends warned him of this, and dared him to grind it to dust and inhale it(note that it is ''not'' to be consumed that way,but it did not have any side effect).He didn't hear our warnings, picked a straw and......Cue the scream, ''in the middle of Art class''.

A few years ago, my scout troup's shirts were redesigned. One day, I brought a few friends home, and one of them happened to be wearing his shirt. I hadn't got mine yet, so my mum hadn't seen the new design. Therefore, I asked her to come look, and the following happened: #QUOTE#Me: *points at friend* "Look, it's our new shirt!" #QUOTE#Friend: *pompously* "Handsome lad not included." #QUOTE#Mum: "Good thing there aren't any of those around then, eh?" #QUOTE#Everyone: *laughs* #QUOTE#Friend: *looks flabbergasted*

One year, My mom, little brother and myself went down to the Outer Banks for a vacation. We had just gotten back from shopping when a big rainstorm hit. As we made our way back to the hotel room, a BIG flash of lightning and a powerful roar of thunder hit (we still think it hit the nearby pool). In our confusion, my mom and myself noticed my brother missing, the only thing that signified that he was around was a piece of paper from one of those big toys you put together floating to the ground like in a cartoon. A quick look around and we found my brother racing up the stairwell to our room: The lightning and thunder spooked him so much, he ran for his life! We keep teasing him every once in awhile over it.

The other day my English teacher forgot how to spell 'illegitimate' and, after a few attempts, crossed it out and wrote 'bastard.' The whole class was in hysterics. What was even funnier, was that she has spelled it correctly the first attempt. A couple of lessons later a similar incident occured, in which someone asked what 'dalliance' met and she responded with 'a lovely old-fashioned word for having it off.' More hysterics ensued.

This troper and a friend were out walking along a path that followed some powerlines to a trailer park. We had determined at the beginning of our trek that we would make it all the way there, when we came upon a rather large, rocky, difficult-to-climb hill. After about ten minutes of just climbing this one hill, we arrived at the top.....to find that the rest of the way consisted of nothing but hills like this. Cue this troper screaming "MOTHERFUCK!" and Troper and friend cracking up. It's now become something of a meme between us.

A paraphrased conversation between Candy Entrails and a Jewish friend: #QUOTE# '''CE''': That was a really tasteless joke you just made there. #QUOTE# '''Friend''': Well, my people were hated, so there's no way we can hate. #QUOTE# '''CE''': That's illogical! You're illogical! #QUOTE# Just then, my friend coughs. #QUOTE# '''CE''': See, see? God is killing you for spreading lies!

Either a CMOF or an example of jerkassery, but This Troper pulled the 'greatest prank ever' around Halloween of '09. He and a group of friends were planning to go to an abandoned mental institution in there home town, and explore the woods behind it. They also had a connection that could get them into some of the old buildings. Anyway, the main group got a call from the organizing member, who told them that he had met this girl and wanted some 'alone time' with her, and asked the rest of the group to show up roughly half an hour later than planned. Instead, the group showed up half an hour 'early.' They set up in the woods around the parking lot; This troper was wearing black jeans, a black T-shirt, black shoes, a black trenchcoat and, to top it all off, a Guy Fawkes mask. The other group was similarly attired in all black, and were placed strategically where they could watch and intercept any runners. The group waited for about fifteen minutes and, sure enough, their friend's car pulls up to the parking lot. This troper let them sit for a couple minutes, and then exits the woods with a lurching walk. Unnoticed, he jumps the last five feet to the car and slams against the driver's side door hard enough to get the car rocking pretty violently. The instant this happens, the driver yells "Who the f**k is that!" loud enough that 'everybody' could hear him, and they both start making really nervous sounds. The person stationed at the top of the hill then shrieks like a banshee, pulls his hood down, and charges down the hillside, giving this troper enough time to get over to the passenger side of the car. The vehicle's occupants didn't see this, however, so they thought there were two masked men. At this point, it was difficult to tell whether it was the guy or the girl screaming, but the girl leaps onto the center console and starts yelling "Lock the doors! Oh god, Lock the doors!" at the top of her lungs. The guy does so, and this troper pulls the door handle just after they lock for effect. The car's driver yells "let's get the f** k out of here!," puts the car in drive, and literally floors it. Their car leaves a rut five feet long in the gravel road as they speed away, and the rest of the pranksters charge out of the woods after them. About two minutes later, one of the pranksters gets out a phone and call the driver, to 'confirm' when the two groups are meeting up. The prankee tells them not to go there, that there's some crazy serial killer in the woods, and that they almost got killed. The pranksters tell them that they just got there and nothing bad happened, so the prankee heads back up. When he arrives, he sees all his friends, the pranksters, standing there in their outfits. The girl that was with him was so mad that she slapped the nearest person, who wasn't even the one in the mask, and starts screaming at the pranksters for being stupid and juvenile. Once the prankees calm down, however, they thought the whole thing was hilarious, and even helped with a later attempt at a similar gag.

This Troper and his friends usually make fun of this one guy. (He's a huge asshole) He's also the fat kid in school. So one day one of my friend goes "Hey how much do you think he weighs?". This Troper replies with "ITS OVER 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!". Cue Laughter throughout the table.

This Troper was in a play, playing an old man who uses a cane. During a break, my friend was trying to catch me after I had been snarking at him and his character for a while. At first, I decide to run away in character, pretending to use a cane. After a while, he starts gaining on me, so I tuck the cane under my arm and bolt. Friend: *still in character* Wait, I thought you needed a cane! Me: The cane is a lie! Friend: *still in character* I'll kill you! Me: Really? Cause I seem to be....Still Alive! *starts singing Still Alive* Yesterday, it was raining and I had to go outside for something, when I got back in I yelled "SHUT UP RAIN!" then shortly after I said "Did I just tell the rain to shut up?" I did get weird looks from family.

In a camp play similar to Pinocchio, the girl playing the lead came to the part where she transforms into a "Real boy" . she said "im alive and I'm...IM A REAL BOY!" and she proceeded to TAKE OFF HER COSTUME in the middle of the performance. the audience and the cast were cracking up laughing while she stood there in her little pink underclothes looking confused while she was being questioned by the director.

I was playing MassEffect 2 and had just finished Miranda's loyalty mission. Now, whenever I finish a mission, I almost immediately talk to someone, causing the alerts that tell me I have new research data to pause until I get out of the conversation. I talked to Miranda, who thanked me for helping her. She made a flirtatious motion to Shepard, but said that she didn't want personal feelings to get in the way of the mission. After the conversation was over, an alert popped up: "Research Unlocked: Hard Shields". This is especially funny, considering how Miranda looks.

The following took place on a Facebook status: #QUOTE#'''Friend 1:''' Making magic juice like daddy made when I was 5 :) #QUOTE#'''Friend 2:''' you don't want to know what makes it "magic" #QUOTE#(It's orange juice and crushed up ice.)

After the last night of a play she was in, this (sophomore at the time) troper was jokingly referred to as a freshman by one of her guy friends, as she is rather short and the youngest of the group. Later, while talking to one of her other guy friends, the following converstaion occurred: #QUOTE#'''Troper:''' I don't want to graduate, I like hanging out with you guys. #QUOTE#'''Ditz:''' Don't worry, you've got three years to go! #QUOTE#'''Troper:''' [Ditz], I'm a sophomore. #QUOTE#'''Ditz:''' ...oh. #QUOTE# Made even funnier when the first friend also forgot I was a sophomore (and that I'm graduating the same year he is) while talking about senior speeches.

This Troper was telling his friend about a Dane Cook routine, that made him laugh really hard, then all of a sudden he stopped, made some gasping noises, then said "think I swallowed my gum.", cue a brief silence, followed by about a minute of uncontrollable laughter.

On another occasion, I was playing Tekken with the same friend at a party at school, he was absolutely dominating me with Eddy Gordo, and I had already called him every cuss word and synonym for homosexual I could think of, and after being defeated by him yet again, I shouted "AGH you, fucking....... agh.. BUTT PIRATE!". Pretty much everyone in the room laughed at my inventive BuffySpeak (although of course I didn't tell them that I stole it from Oz).

This Troper recently had two crowning moments. You see, this Troper has a habit of riffing movies while seeing them with pals. He and a pal went to see Vampires Suck and during one scene when a vampire mentioned having the munchies while staring down a human, I joked he wanted a "bag o cheetos." Cue a couple of seconds later in the movie the vampire actually taking a bag of cheetos and snacking on them.

During the same viewing, when Edward's Dad gave the line that they were a normal American family, "who just happen to lack souls and walk the earth to quench our insatiable thirst for blood" I managed to yell out in the theater, "JUST LIKE REPUBLICANS!". Someone in the theater who I didn't even know laughed at the comment. It was great.

Holy s**t! I'm not sure, but I think that the person you made laugh was ME! Anyway, my crowing moment of funny happend durring one of the preveiws before the movie. Durring the preview Lady Gaga's song poker face was playing, unfortnately this troper and his friends are fans of Yu-Gi-Oh The Abrigded Series causing me to yell out "BROOKLIN RAGE!" making my all friends laugh.

This troper's family seems to bee a magnet for this trope. One of the more significant tales is the time that a pet dwarf hamster had died, and this troper's siblings had the genius idea to cremate said hamster. By wrapping it in toilet paper. and setting it on fire. On the ledge of the fireplace. Inside the house. Cue burnt fur, charred toilet paper, and the house rule that all cremations must take place outdoors.

This troper had one in her 18th Century Novel class, when our professor was explaining the concept of the romantic novel and saying that Twilight would be considered a modern example of one. One student suggested that the skin of Meyer's vampires further emphasizes the romantic novel's fantastical elements, explaining to the professor, who had never read the books and only knew the basic concepts of the series, that the vampires' skin sparkles in the sunlight. Cue the professor bursting out laughing.

These happen rather often with this troper's cosplay group, but the best has to be when we were all fooling around in the hotel room after a recent convention, and this troper grabbed her friend's [=DSi=] and was playing with the sound recording function. This troper had NO IDEA what to say after a while, so she's just sitting there making noise, and then... #QUOTE# ''Friend:'' DURHURR DE DERPA DERRR- *cut off by the time limit of the microphone*

It was pretty funny already, but then this troper started messing with the pitch/speed options...said friend is now affectionately known as "The Derp Monster"

Oh god, I have so many...

As a tenth-grader, our french teacher, a NietzcheWannabe with a strange fashion sense (among others, gothic dresses and Satanic T-Shirts) was talking about a ''very'' nihilistic play and told us exactly those words : "In that play, everything is false and meaningless...", ending her sentence with a melodramatic "...''just like your lives.''", pointing to the classroom. One year later, we still talk about it.

One year before, we had to do a "circus" performance with a specific theme during the Sports lesson. I - a melodramatical EvilOverlord - was with a friend, a silent and shy KnightInShiningArmor, and we chose as a theme the fight between Light and Darkness. The whole "choregraphy" was quite over-the-top, with flying scarves and fencing with wooden poles while juggling. However, the real [=CMoF=] awaits at the end... It was supposed to be the defeat of "Light" (my friend) which falls elegantly while Darkness (me) poses triumphally. Except that instead of falling in a noble way, "Light" ''tripped on his own feet'' and fell ridiculously on the floor for our great finale. Of course, I couldn't focus on a victory pose, because I was too busy face-palming and muttering : "I said ''elegantly'' !" Worst part is that we weren't allowed to laugh on scene. Surprisingly, this EpicFail was rewarded with quite a good mark.

Today, I received a DeathNote. No - not a DeathNote manga, the thing supposed to kill people. Why ? Just because I act a lot like Kira. Then, during chemistry lesson... Some annoying guy keeps interrupting the class saying stupid thinks. I stare at my friend (a few seats away from me) only to see him miming... something... what is he doing ? I take a closer look... He was miming the act of writing something on a blank sheet... and then dramatically slashing the air with his pencil. Thankfully I'm good at holding my laughter...

This troper's American Literature textbook in 11th grade had one. On one page someone had drawn a picture of the teacher in crayon, saying something about how much she loves Moby-Dick. I regret not getting a picture of it. It might not have been as funny if it had been a picture of a teacher I actually liked, though.

This troper recently saw a Youtube video where someone had made {{Sims}} of the Gaang. In one part of the video, the stove caught fire, and in typical Sim fashion, everyone in the house ran toward it and started freaking out. Including Zuko. You know, the guy who's supposed to ''control fire''. It's not exactly a ''personal'' anecdote, but for whatever reason, it struck me as hysterical.

This troper and his mother were grocery shopping. I was finishing a joke explanation of how I had failed to thwart a supposed plan of hers, and I decided to cap it off with an imitation of Darth Vader's BigNo. But we had just walked into the soup aisle, and... #QUOTE#'''This Troper's Mom:''' Do you want some chicken soup? #QUOTE#'''This Troper:''' NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! #QUOTE#*{{Beat}}* #QUOTE#'''This Troper:''' ''(explains what happened, then cracks up)''

In this troper's ecology class, a bunch of guys were talking about SouthPark. I asked them "aren't you guys a little old for cartoons?"...while reading the Comic Book Guy book from TheSimpsons Library of Wisdom.

Today, this troper and her sister were playing volleyball outisde in an effort to avoid our mother. We each chose a character from Invader Zim and somehow managed to play volleyball for at least half an hour while staying in character. She was Zim, I was Dib. Highlights include me turning around and missing the volleyball when my sister yelled "hey look! Bigfoot!" and her calling me a human worm baby and yelling "why must this be?" when she missed the volleyball. Also, my sister wanted to stop playing at one point. I said "you forfeit, you lose." She kept playing.

Also, apparently she's ''still'' in character. After tasting dental floss to see if I was right about it tasting horrible (I just got the floss today, so neither of us knew what this random brand of dentist floss tasted like) she reacted ''a lot'' like Zim, including yelling about human germs, flopping around on my bed, and ran into the bathroom to wash the taste out of her mouth, yelling "why must this be?!" The floss really does taste awful.

One time, I was playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl with one of my guy friends. He was playing some character I didn't remember, I was playing {{Kirby}}. Every time he knocked Kirby into the air, Kirby puffed himself up and floated back to the stage. ''"Curse you, Kirby!!"''

This Troper was at her school when the door to our class was locked. I had gotten a fork from this game at school (you put your hand in a box and try to guess what you were touching, and if you were right, you got it), and I wanted to see if I could pick the lock. Whilst doing this, I started to yell, "Come on you stupid ''fooooooooooork''! Why can't you pick the lock? Answer this question, fork! What walks on four legs in the morning, two legs in the evening, and three legs in the afternoon? A man! You couldn't answer the question of the Sphynxxxx!" the teacher walked up to me, and had her head tilted to the side and giving me a blank stare before unlocking the door.'

"24 YEAR OLD FURRIES FROM CHICAGO, DAVID. 24 YEAR OLD FURRIES FROM CHICAGO." -This troper on his previous experiences with online dating.

My Mum accidentally commented on my sister's Facebook status instead of a friend's status about a TV show, leading to this: #QUOTE# Troper's Sister is engaged. #QUOTE# Mum: Missed it - so thanks for the 'heads up'. Being repeated on Thursday night, if anyone's interested.

In this troper's Science class, we were learning about the Earth's functions. We got to one vocabulary word, which was cleavage. The definition of that is "a smooth flat surface". Everyone was holding in their laughter until the teacher said, "Doesn't sound like a smooth, flat, surface". Everyone cracked up so bad.

Same sort of thing happened to me when I was doing my research paper on Serpentine(asbestos). I was highly confused when one of the things I was supposed to research was it's "Cleavage."

This troper's friends were going on about her date when a (completely awesome) teacher walked by. They announced that I had a date to him and after expressing his happiness, he began to ask questions: #QUOTE# Teacher: Any college ambitions? (Note: This troper is a junior, albeit a very young one who made the dealine by five days. This is, in fact, quite important.) #QUOTE# Friend: He's a freshman. #QUOTE# Teacher: YOU CRADLE-ROBBER! (as friends are attempting to stifle their giggling) I ''like'' it! (everyone starts laughing hysterically)

And now I can't pass him without getting a thumbs-up and a very weird grin. And my friends keep calling me a cradle-robber, too.

This troper and her eight-year-old sister got into a discussion on the afterlife, and she asked me what you called the opposite of heaven. I responded "Hell, of course" and she was shocked that I had cursed before I explained that "hell" was completely clean when used in that sense. A few weeks later, she bought an black angel costume for Halloween, and when a couple of guests asked her what she was going to be for Halloween, she responded sweetly, "I'm going to be an angel from hell." Cue shocked expressions followed by side-splitting laughter that spread across the table.

The teenage years should be fun.

This troper's class is practically a living CMOF. One example: Arcade games are quite popular in our class, and the boys decided to do a Marvel-vs.-Capcom-themed battle, with Tekken characters joining in and fight moves styled after...krumpin'. One memorable moment was when one boy decided to go as Spider-Man. He shot paper webs, and pretended to swing around the room, by aiming his hands up, balancing on one leg with the other stuck up in front of him, and hopping around madly across the room, kicking "Jin Kazama" and "Dhalsim".

In this troper's English class, we're allowed to eat and drink. One day, one of the immature boys in the class brings a burrito with him to eat. Cue the following: #QUOTE#'''Boy in Class (Referring to the burrito):'''I wonder how big this is. #QUOTE#'''Me:'''That's what she said. Then, the teacher heard me and began laughing. Why? The teacher never expects me to hear it, since this troper is usually quiet during class, unlike her classmates.

Back when this troper was in high school she was in an Environmental Club run by a childhood freind and and supervised by one of the most awesome teachers in school. Here a a few moments: The first after school movie night we Watched a bear documentary: Whole group: are...are those bears mateing? Club President: We should take a picture! Teacher: Good idea! *goes to get camera* In the process of pausing the movie, we somehow stopped it, had to restart it, spent an INSANE amount of time getting it back to EXACTLY where we had stopped it the first time, and took a picture with the club members on both sides Making posters advertising said movie night: Random Club Girl: give me a bunch of papers, I can write fast! Club President: remember to spell environmental right! She does not look up at where environmental is spelled the whole time and actually DOES end up making the majority of the posters After we split up to hang them up around the school this occurs: Random Club Girl: I have one poster left. I couldn't find a spot to put it. Club President: Okay give it-you misspelled environmental... We had five minutes before class started and had to do a mad dash across campus to tear all her posters down Doing the school's recycling: I come back into the classroom to return the shopping cart we use to haul stuff

HUFF* *PUFF* "Sorry it took so long...I had to do it alone. Club President: WHY? At the end of the year, I got an award and everyone else got bitched out The year after that we had co-presidents, one of which was also a fairly good friend of the now former Club President Campus clean up day: I come running down to the club room with gloves, garbage bags, and a rake Where is everyone? Teacher: Oh, sorry about that {other club president} just left I had run down there less than a MINUTE after school had let out and was stuck waiting outside the front of the school in the freezing cold for half and hour for my ride Recycling Day: I'm pushing a friend in the shopping cart and go to open a door when a popular substitute teacher opens it for me and looks at my friend in the cart Sub: I don't want to know, do I? Except for that failed Campus clean up day, we did nothing all semester until the former club president came to visit me and asked about the club...needless to say, that changed real fast...

This Troper once went to Cedar Point with his band class. We walked past Witch's Wheel, it spins you around really fast, and we heard a kid screaming. Keep in mind that there's a really tall ride to the left of it, and looking at that ride while on the Wheel is really disoreanting. Me, being my nice self, yelled "Look to the left!" Cue the screams getting louder 10 fold.

This Troper remembers a German Class when the German Exchanges were over for the week. One person said to another to say something to them. Without checking the dictionary first, he told them he was gay. (In German.) Most people reached for their dictionaries, once what he said was known all around, hillarity ensued.

And in Drama, we're currently studying Blood Brothers, I forgot how we got there but somehow we were all, even the teacher, talking about vaginas. Nobody SAID vagina, we were using nicknames, until the same guy from above says it. He got a house point for it.

Since the beginning of the school year, this one boy has been annoying the crap out of everyone. He constantly disrupts class by making noises, makes jokes about homosexuality and rasism, and refuses to work because he believes he knows everything in the world. More than halfway through the year, my fed up teacher finally asked, "Who here thinks Noah is annoying?" Every single hand went up within a second.

This Troper has one that (apparently) also counts as a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. There are a couple of very messed up girls in my year at school, who never fail to annoy the shit out of ''somebody'', and on one particular day, I happened to just generally be pissed off due to the fact that... well, there wasn't really a reason. Off day. Anyway, I overheard one of the annoying girls say to someone I didn't even ''like'' that much, and was actually just as bad as the bitchy girls, "Go and get a life." I can be the most pedantic person ''in the world'' when I want to, so I just went straight over, and, with a completely deadpan expression, said, "Actually, I think you will find that she does have a life. She is breathing, and, unless I am very much mistaken, her heart is beating. Therefore, she is, indeed, alive." The bitchy girl then proceeded to inform me that "That's so gay." I replied, "I ''see!'' ''That's'' where I've been going wrong all this time. Being attracted to someone of your own gender doesn't mean you're gay, being ''alive'' does!" *Beat.* "By definition, that classes ''you'' as gay. At least think through your insults before throwing them at me." You know what teenage girls are like.

This trooper's friends were in a D&D campaign. I don't know the exact details, but somehow, they ended up in a monster encounter around a gazeebo. Cue standard epic D&D monster fight. However, halfway through the encounter, one of the players decides to start attacking the gazeebo itself. The DM tells him to knock it off. The player doesn't. After the third round of the dumbass attacking the gazeebo, the DM graces everyone with this line: #QUOTE# YOU HAVE ENCOURED THE WRATH OF THE GAZEEBO!!!

What follows is the gazeebo coming to life and slaughtering the entire party. Mainly because everyone was too busy pissing themselves with laughter.

This troper once had a dream about her Exeggutor evolving into a Jirachi.

A few days ago, this troper’s entire English class was talking at once. The teacher told everybody to be quiet, and they all shut up at the exact same time… except this troper, who blurted out a perfectly timed, " ...and then I said 'Oatmeal? Are you crazy?” The whole class stared at her in surprise and a few giggled, but no one seemed to get the joke…until the tough-guy quarterback leaned over and slapped this troper a high-five, loudly and proudly declaring, “All right! Pinkie Pie for the win!”

In this troper's art class, the teacher was explaining howe should write up our art history projects, and used Gaugin as an example, and this occurred: #QUOTE# Teacher: ...He liked to paint his wife. Probably because he was in his thirties and she was thirteen. #QUOTE# Class: Ewwww! #QUOTE# Teacher: Anyways, if you were doing Gaugin-- #QUOTE# *beat* #QUOTE# Girl: *snort*

We couldn't continue the lesson for at least 5 minutes.

This troper was listening to the radio when she heard a voice say something about a deceased donkey. Cue hysterical laughter.

I was in school one day, and it was lunch. I said I didn't like Pizza Hut. Then, a kid named Spencer shouted, "Me neither!"... from the bathroom.

A completely random but amazingly funny thing happened while playing forge mode in Halo 3. There where those gravity things (called Hand cannon [I think]) and my friend was in a scorpion tank. He drove towards one of them while I was shooting randomly and right as I was reloading (Be aware that we where invurnable and had infinite ammo) I turned around right as his scorpion tank went flying and it happened to hit me and I went flying across the map in the lazer zone (I went this far because we had gravity on 50% and player speed at 300%) We tried to recreate it but we only got that to happen that one time.

I was in a history lesson and someone made a comment "My shorts have gone brown".

I have one from my work experience. I had a call from a potential instructor who was blind and wanted to know if the system (It was a online school) was able to use screen readers and Braille keyboards. So I called our Level 2 agents for assistance since I didn't know the answer to the question. I asked the Level 2 agent that I got about this and said about the Braille keyboards. The answer I got to saying about it the first time "you mean the keyboard with big letters?" This quickly became a running joke for our team and we just about on the floor laughing so much the first time I told them about this.

An assistant manager at the bank where ThisTroper once worked got a hold of the branch's login at Staples' office-delivery website. He then proceeded to place a series of increasingly strange orders just to see what he could get away with. Finally, the branch manager returned from the break room and asked the entire teller line, "Does anyone know why there are six cases of Cinnamon Toast Crunch in the break room supply closet?" Dead silence, as we all knew who was responsible but were more loyal to the guilty party than to the boss. I served the next customer and said "I can tell you your balance but can you tell me why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?" Cue the complete breakdown of order and professionalism among the entire teller line and a whole bunch of confused customers. Thankfully the branch manager was stewing in his office behind a closed door.

This troper, several years ago, was discussing the VietnamWar draft in high school. When the teacher compared it to a kind of lottery, I piped up with 'What do I win?!'. His classmate, with an unerring comedic timing, immiediately replied with - delivered in a complete deadpan - "A million dollars! It's behind those trees; ''Guarded by a man called 'Charlie'''". I had trouble breathing.

This troper was in a philosophy class not long ago. The professor, usually very GenreSavvy, let his guard down and let slip the words "what is love." Without any planning, I and the guy next to me who I barely knew immediately and simultaneously broke out in song.

One day, this troper and her mother came home from running an errand to find that there was a message in our answering machine. We've gotten a lot of wrong numbers in our day, but they usually say what they're looking for and/or why they're calling. Not this time. The message only contained one sentence, screeched by an older woman: "I! NEED! A PLUMBER!!!"

One time, while I was playing D&D, one of the characters was hiding behind a couch (he didn't trust anyone), my character walks in and calls out that it's time to go. The other role player said "I slowly stand up from behind the couch and say-" He was cut off by my cellphone blasting "Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting!..." It took a good ten minutes for us to calm down.

I was doing math in class one day when a teacher was trying to help an immigrant student. She didn't have a pencil, and reaching over next to me, she grabbed my pencil out of my hand and erased real quick. This troper got the pencil back, but it took him about five minutes to calm down from funny attacks.

This troper had two times in a math class. The first was after New Years, and the teacher asked if we had a good new year. "I did, until I saw your face." The class was dead silent. The Teacher? "No comment!" The second time was the reaction from a joke, this troper laughing so hard that he couldn't breathe. "So, anyone wanna give him CPR? No? Okay!" The class loved that even more.

This one trope had one of the most embarrassing moments of his life with this scene: #QUOTE#(Friend of mine, in cafeteria) Hey, man, what do you think about Lance Armstrong's doping case? #QUOTE#(Me, eating a sandwich) Sorry, man, but I dunno ANYTHING about soccer. #QUOTE#(Friends on the same table) *WTF? expression*

This troper's class recently did a make-your-own society project. One of the students did a nudist colony. They said "Sex is accepted and totally okay with us". This troper said "And some-times accidental, too." Cue absolute derailment of classroom for five minutes due to so much laughter.

This troper had one in the cinema. One specific comercial for a newspaper had a narrator and, near the end of it, said narrator asks "Are you sitting comfortably?". This troper said "No", and the narrator said "good" as part of the comercial. This had both me, my friend and two guys behind us laughing until the movie was a few minutes in.

This troper once got annoyed at her classmate, picked up his pencil case and flung it at his face. He used a 'karate chop' motion to deflect it, and it came back to hit her straight in the face. The whole class were in stitches and all this troper could do was shake his hand and say, 'epic win, my friend.'

In this troper's social studies class, one of her classmates got interrupted by the PA system when he was trying to show the class his political cartoon. This is what went down: #QUOTE#'''PA system:''' ''[blah blah blah blah yadda yadda]'' #QUOTE#'''Teacher:''' Now, [classmate], go ahead and tell us about your cartoon. #QUOTE#'''Classmate:''' Well, I - #QUOTE#'''PA system:''' ''[blah blah blah blah yadda yadda blah]''

The same thing happened in this troper's class, only with a ''teacher'': #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' And the layer below the cornified layer is the granu- #QUOTE#'''PA system:''' *makes a tune to signify beginning of announcement* Boys basketball practices have been cancelled this Thursday due to bad weather. #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' (thinking it's over) As I was saying, the granu- #QUOTE# '''PA system:''' I repeat, boys basket ball practices have been cancelled this Thursday. #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' ({{Beat}}) Again, the granu- #QUOTE# '''PA system:''' Scrabble club meetings will be moved to the assembly hall until further notice. I repeat, scrabble club meetings will be moved to the assembly hall. #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' *stays quiet and stares at the PA system annoyedly* #QUOTE# '''PA system:''' ... *makes tune to signify the announcement is over* #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' ({{Beat}}) Finally. Now, as I was saying, the layer below is the granular layer, which- #QUOTE# '''PA system:''' *makes a tune to signify beginning of ''another'' announcement* #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' ... *puts head in her hands while the students burst out laughing*

A group of This Troper's friends snuck into our high school before the final day of class and attached a radio receiver to the public address system. The following morning, they made some funny announcements with a handheld radio from across the street before getting caught by the teachers. That's not the CMOF, which didn't come until later, when the electronics company hired to remove the receiver realized they couldn't do so without replacing quite a bit of equipment. The receiver is still there and periodically picks up trucker CB radio conversations from the nearby Interstate-10 Freeway, which it naturally broadcasts to the whole school. Anyone who's used a CB knows that truckers can have some rather gross conversations, and did I mention this high school is Catholic? Truly the gift that keeps on giving.

It seems like the first words to any message over a school PA system are "Please excuse the interruption." It subsequently became a minor meme in my high school for students fed up with being interrupted all day to shout "NO!" whenever this was said. This is not what's funny. The funny part is that it became semi-common to see ''teachers'' doing the same thing!

When this troper was in 7th grade, they had to do some construction on her junior high. When they went in to hook-up the PA system, but they accidentally hooked it up to the Principal's answering machiene. Causing the PA System to play his outgoing message to the entire school. The ''ENTIRE SCHOOL'' busted up laughing for a good five minutes.

This troper had one once in high school band. While the band director was addressing the band, he overheard one of the euphonium players (named Dale) having a conversation with another musician. When the director called Dale out to share his conversation with the rest of the band, Dale said he was talking about how the director's socks were of uneven length. The director politely smiled and said, "Dale ... go to Hell." The director had the decency to give the band five minutes to laugh the incident out of their systems, and Dale took it like a good sport, as if he knew he had it coming.

In yet another PA related system, our schools bells ring for about five seconds of a single continuous beep. The bell for a class change we weren't involved in started to ring at the exact moment our teacher shouted out stop for a reason I forgot... and the bell, for no reason, was cut down to a mere quarter second beep. We didn't stop laughing for a good two minutes.

One time, in geography class, the professor was using this board where anything written on it is displayed on another larger screen to make it easier for students sitting farther away. He started today's lecture by trying to write down mass movements, but for some reason the first letter didn't make it onto the larger screen, making it look like it was spelled ass movements. Lots of snickering occured before the teacher knew what was going on.

This troper also has a mother who once taught English to a group of students in Japan. Alot of the assignements she graded were often filled with many grammatical errors but the two that made me and my sister laugh until we cried was how two students ended their essay homework: "After the concert, everyone crapped" and "After the concert, everone gave them the clap (for those who don't know what the "clap" is, in happens to mean a sexually transmitted disease in English)

Earlier this year, this troper starred in a college production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, in which the very first scene took place on an Athenian yacht. Close to showtime, we were rehearsing that very scene when our stage manager decided to replace the opening track with The Lonely Island's "I'm On A Boat". We must have spent a good fifteen minutes laughing our asses off.

In this troper's social studies class, me and a couple of my friends were studying World War I propaganda posters. One of the British posters had a picture of an upside-down German soldier's helmet and said "Do you want a fern basket like this?" For some reason, there was an equal sign between "fern" and "basket". Now it's an inside joke for us to say things like "I want a fern equals basket!"

In this troper's math class, the teacher asked for the answer to a math problem that was being done as part of a lecture in front of the class. This troper immediately responded with "Over 9000!". The teacher's response caused a large amount of laughter from the class, mainly because the teacher had no idea what she had just referenced. #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' What do you mean 9000?

In this same troper's history class, the teacher asked why the Egyptians chose to attack the Nubians. This troper's answer? "Because they're n00bs." The teacher's response? #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' No, not because they are "n00bs" and they're easy to "pwn".

Similar instance happened in a Japanese lession: #QUOTE# '''Teacher:''' How many kanji do you think there are?

This troper's grandfather once told him of a prank he used to play as a child where he and his friends would hide a wind-up alarm clock ''somewhere'' in the school library, set it to go off at a random time of day, then watch the hilarity ensue as the librarian tried in vain to track down where that mysterious ringing noise was coming from.

I can top that. In my high school physics class, our teacher knew less about physics and math than any of the students. While screwing off one day, my buddies and I found an entire cabinet full of stop watches (and another one full of slinkies, but that's another story). Said stop watches had an alarm feature. Every day for the rest of the year all 20 or so stop watches would go off simultaneously. She never found them, which is sad because we didn't even hide them

Before going on study leave towards the end of Year 11, me and around 25-30 classmates each bought a small alarm clock, set them to random times, and hid them around the school. According to my sister (who is younger than me, so was still at school), they caused a satisfying amount of disruption

In high school, my IB Coordinator/History teacher was introducing the class on the very first day when he was interrupted by the PA. Casually, he reaches toward the clock on the wall/PA speaker setup, which is oddly bent, fishes out a partially stripped red wire, unplugs it (stopping the announcement in the room), and carries on. Cue jaw-drops and laughter from the class. He only ever plugs it back in on student request, when a sub comes, or if an administrator is scheduled to visit... And at the beginning of the year, so he can surprise all his new students again.

ThisTroper's high-school English-teacher decided to try a game during the last day of school: everyone got two flash cards, wrote a question on one, and the answer on another. Then, the cards were shuffled among the students. The combination that one student found: #QUOTE# Why do people go to jail? #QUOTE# To meet their one true love.

This troper was kind enough to spout out, "Using the soap!" once the initial laughter died down. The English teacher was doubled over in laughter.

During my Highschool days, during our annual Sports Day Dry Run, we were supposed to unveil our year's Battle Cheer (which we did not have because our year was notoriously filled with slackers). But, that day was one of our team captain's birthday. Therefore, after the "3, 2, 1..." that started all Battle Cheers, out came a rousing chorus of "Happy Birthday". {{Hilarity Ensues}}.

During math class in 8th grade, people were giving tours of our school. My teacher saw them coming and said "Everyone look smart! Butler, hide!"

My school has a tradition of producing a video short for every major holiday assembly in an effort to leave the entire student body in stitches. Two notable examples are the Faculty Musical and the 12 Days of BCA (the last one was performed live with the video as background, so you can hear the laughter that ensued; personally, I think that makes it even funnier).

Another cat-related story: One of our family's female felines had a litter of 4, and we kept them all. One, a fluffy orange one we named 'Elvis', was always a bit of a show off. One day, we were cleaning out a walk in closet that had a floor to ceiling mirror on the back wall. By this point, the kittens were at the age where they were little fuzzy terrors, stampeding about the house at all hours. We're cleaning the closet and here come Elvis, sprinting into the closet with his fur puffed, in full super-cute 'Look What I Can Do!' mode. He sprinted full tilt into the mirror, knocking himself silly for a moment before charging out of the closet. No cleaning got done for several minutes. To this day, we still can't figure out why he didn't at least swerve to avoid the "other cat".

During High School chemistry, this troper once asked (in full smart ass mode) of Sodium Fluoride, "Can you eat it?" The teacher's reply, "Once."

This troper has many of these. Some of the most memorable:

When my family bought a new German Shepherd puppy, my rabbit was less than pleased. After some weeks in which the dog grew rapidly, my rabbit got sick of this usurper. The German Shepherd bounded up to him, ready to chase him around the yard. The cute, fluffy bunny named Cuddles laid back his ears and jumped at her. She was so surprised that she pulled up short. Not satisfied, however, Cuddles proceeded to actually chase ''her'' around the yard.

Once, my friend fell asleep in class. No one noticed until he fell out of his desk. Amazingly, he didn't wake up when he hit the floor. The teacher thought he was dead.

In my pre-cal class, we somehow got onto the subject of how close it is socially acceptable to stand to other people. One boy, who is actually very nice but has no sense of when enough is enough and likes to mess with people, especially girls, said in all earnestness, "Yeah, some people just stand way too close to you!" Without even thinking, I turned around and said in a very loud voice, "Yeah, like ''you''." The whole class burst into laughter. The best part? I'm normally extremely quiet and this was the first time most of them had ever heard me speak. As one boy said, "First time I ever heard her say a word, and it was ''that.''" The teacher actually came over and gave me a hug because she was so amused. Power to the quiet ones.

One day during lunch in high school, my friend said something (can't remember what) to my other friend, who gave a confused stare and said, "Did you just say 'I want to fuck your pizza?'" We all laughed so hard we couldn't breathe.

At This Troper's old school, there was a Christmas Sing-a-long. When we were singing "The 12 Days of Christmas", they put up the Shrek version, even though we were supposed to sing the original. Hilarity Ensued.

In an English Lit class in college, the teacher had us reading passages from a story. One of the students, normally a vibrant girl started reading in a monotone voice made all the better in that the passages being read also had comedic lines. They were read in such a way that they came off as deadpan. What made this hilarious was that the normally stoic teacher snickered and tried to hide it. One by one the class started laughing as the teacher lost control. Just as things would get under control the teacher would still be laughing which would set off everybody else again. It got to the point that virtually all of us were crying tears and several had to physically leave the room to try and catch their breath. Needless to say, nothing productive was done the final 10 minutes of class.

This troper was talking to the Army recuiter about joining the 82nd and the Major walks out of his office to talk to me personally. After we got past the physical and mental taxs, he got into stories, and this troper's favorite was a jump he did in '76. An Air Force Combat Controller jumped wearing boots, a parachute, and a rifle. There is a picture of said jump at the Combat Control school in Hulbert Field, Florida.

I'm assuming you mean "and nothing else?" otherwise I don't get it.

This troper does not have the timing to pull off most 'That's what she said' jokes, but it doesn't stop me from trying. I saw Harry Potter at midnight with a group of friends and we'd been whispering 'thats what she said/your mom' jokes the hours before. At one point, Harry says something along the lines of "I didn't catch it in my hands. I nearly swallowed it." To which, I (accidentally, I meant to say it quietly to my friend) yelled in response, "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" The entire front /section/ of the theater burst out laughing.

A friend of this troper once ate three kiwi fruits (skin and all)... and then we told him they were poisonous. he proceeded to phone his mum about this, asking if we were lying or not. (sadly, she told him the truth. she did, however, call him a muppet on facebook later.)

Yet another PA antic. Our room got rung by the PA system to please send a student to the office for something. The teacher is known by the office to be a joker. #QUOTE#PA: Mr. [Last Name]? #QUOTE#Teacher: (holding down the button) WHAT! #QUOTE#PA: Could you please send [student] to the main office? #QUOTE#Teacher: NO! (releasing the response button, to the student) Go ahead. #QUOTE#PA: (laughing) Oh, come on! #QUOTE#Teacher: I don't wanna! #QUOTE#PA: Please? #QUOTE#Teacher: What'll you give me? #QUOTE#PA: (static) #QUOTE#Teacher: Hello? HELLO! Can you hear me? #QUOTE#Teacher from down the hallway: YES!

In a History class, we were taking a test, so it was silent when we heard the teacher next door, mumbling, with one line standing out in particular, "''Cyber'' sex." We were all lightly laughing, the normally stoic teacher smirked a little and told us to get back on with our test. It sounded like a question and answer section going on, after a while, and five minutes later, a student shouted "MASTURBATION!" on the top of his lungs. Our teacher's head went down into her folded arms and she was vibrating with laughter.

I guess this is more of a fail at CMOF than anything but....This Troper was in an east Asian history class while in college and thought he'd be silly when a teacher asked: "Does anyone know anything about Rōnin?" and this troper responded with: "Yeah...there were 47 of them, right?".......Cue silence from the class and a blank why-dont-you-be-serious look form the teacher.....also cue an embarrassed sliding into the chair when there was a lack of reaction from the class...{{facepalm}}

My Computer Programming teacher tends to be hilarious. He responds to any "What happens if ____" question asked regarding a test or program with "You fail." He also taped an {{Engrish}} fortune cookie messagepatient! The Great Wall didn't got built in one day! I had given to him to the classroom's closet's door. But my favorite is this: Several times, a sophomore girl comes into our class to work on something using one of the computers. She spends her time goofing off with her boyfriend (Who is in the class) or any other people who came in to work on their projects instead of doing the work she came in to do. One time, he logged onto the administrator computer and "overshadowed" her computer from it, typing stupid things onto her project or making her go on weird websites until she noticed that the mouse was moving of its own accord and looked around fearfully trying to find what was causing it.

One from yesterday, too. The bell hadn't rung yet. Now, when the classroom doors close, you can't open them from the outside without a key. Most of us were in the classroom early, but one arrived about a minute before the bell, and the door was currently closed. He gestured to us through the door's windows to let him in, but the teacher simply waved at him and continued talking about whatever we were discussing before class. Eventually the bell rang, ''then'' he opened the door and let in the student, and told him he was late.

The D&D campaign my friends and I just started had quite a few examples, from threatening to set the king's messenger on fire(repeatedly) to inventing the Aerial Strip club, but by far the crowning moment was this: #QUOTE#Wizard(Me): That's quite a shiny crown.(To Rogue)Ten gold pieces says you can't steal it. #QUOTE#Rogue: You're on. I can do that. #QUOTE#King(DM): I can hear you plotting to steal my crown, you know. #QUOTE#Wizard: (Bluff check)No, you can't... #QUOTE#DM: You can't do that... #QUOTE#Wizard: These aren't the droids you're looking for.

This trooper was watching our cat, hoping that she would go into the garage just before we would close it as we were leaving to do something in town, but of course as we were closing it, we urged her to go inside, but of course, she goes the other way, which actually prompted me to more or less yell out "You're going the wrong way!"

This troper got a stuffed rabbit from Build A Bear the other day. After spending a long time trying to come up with a name, my sister suggested "knee slapper" (and then whacked me in the knee with it). She then suggested "Pacific Ocean". This quickly evolved into "Sir Knee Slapper of the Pacific Ocean", which was shortened into SKNSPO (pronounced "Sneeze Poe"). She then started dancing around my room singing "SKNSPO! He danced without shame! SKNSPO! He has a funny name!SKNSPO! He does a bunny dance! SKNSPO! This rabbit has no paaaaaaaaaaaants!" I am scarred for life.

This Troper lives a life of these. XD First one comes from last year at Solo and Ensemble. This troper's friends were sent to get the bus so that we could go get dinner at McDonalds. The two managed to hitch a ride back up to the school on the bus without having to walk all the way back. However, once they got off of the bus to go get our teacher, the bus was pulling away to go back to the bus lot... which was not what we wanted. This troper asked her friend why the bus was pulling away and the friend literally swirled around and began screaming "HEY! WAIT! COME BACK!!!" She even ran after--- not jogged, full out RAN--- after the bus in her high-heeled boots. This troper and her other friend were dying because their friend is a short black girl and just seeing her run after a bus in high heels killed us.

Then there was another one that still sticks with this troper. She wore a t-shirt that said "Smart Cookie" on it to school. This troper has a friend who's a foreign exchange student from China and she's just so darned cute. She saw my shirt and she said "Oh, then if you're a smart cookie, I'm a... stupid cake." This troper almost fell to the floor laughing. You just had to be there and hear the way she said it.

One day, this troper was playing a Mad Libs game with her best friend. Because we have very dirty minds, the story came out like this: #QUOTE#Once upon a crap, there were three little pigs. The first pig was very screwy, and he built a house for himself out of shits. The second little pig was poopy, and he built a house out of fucks. But the third little pig was very bitchy, and he built his house out of genuine bitches. Well, one day, a mean old wolf came along and saw the houses. “Fuck this shit!” he said. “I'll poop and I'll bitch and I'll blow your house down.” And he blew down the first little pig's douche and the second little pig's douches. The two little pigs ran to the third pig's house. Thereupon, the wolf began blowing, but he couldn't blow down the third little pig's ass house. So he pooped off into the forest, and the three little son-of-a-bitchy pigs moved to Chicago and went into the sausage business. The end.

Me and my group of idiot friends. You might remember us from the fireworks Walmart accident. #QUOTE# Lexi: HEY GUYS I KNOW HOW TO PISS EVERYONE OFF AT WALMART. #QUOTE#Phillip: Begin? #QUOTE#Trang: HEY GUYS I JUST HEARD ABOUT THIS AWESOME SERIES CALL PAN- #QUOTE# Us: SHUT UP! #QUOTE#Lexi: We could grab one of Royce's fireworks- #QUOTE#Me: Oh oh, how about the streamer? #QUOTE#Lexi: Yeah yeah who cares. We had more hilarious times, such as the Alex/Phillip dicussion, How Trang blew off a cow's tail, us stealing Lexi's fireworks, etc. Good times.

I was playing SettlersOfCatan with my parents. I had a 2:1 Wood port, but I was way behind. My hand was 2 sheep and 2 wood. #QUOTE#Me: Well, I know I'm screwed... (trades wood for a sheep) ...so I'm going into sheep farming.

In the end, I had 10 sheep. #QUOTE#Me: Why am I ''doing'' this?!

This troper's mother is renowned for these, but easily the best one is when we were heading on holiday. We'd stopped at a set of traffic lights, and a bright red convertible had pulled up next to us with a middle aged man in the driver's seat. My mother made a show of studying him for several seconds, before turning to my Pa and stating 'midlife crisis and just come out of the closet'. Cue the laughter from my family. But it doesn't end there. Not a second later, and I shit you not this actually happened, the exact same red convertible pulls up next to the first convertible. The guy driving it is an exact clone of the first guy. They noticed each other, looked over each other's cars and then did that 'nice car you got there' respect nod. My family was in hysterics. It only ended when the lights turned green and the first guy did a little shampoo hair head toss and floored it. Needless to say, it's an ongoing joke in our family now.

This troper has an amazingly close knit and fun show choir. One day, while learning choreography, one move has to place both hands parallel to the right and left of our head. Our director screams, "If you don't do THIS move, I will KILL you." In deadpan, I say, "So will Madonna. VOGUE, LET YOUR BODY GROVE TO THE MUSIC." Complete with more poses. We laughed for a good ten minutes. I still get quoted on it. Eff yeah.

I tried to paint a creepy painting of a decomposing doll. It looked like a yawning T-rex in a skirt. %%%% %%%% %% This page is at breaking point. No more examples, please. Go to TroperTales/FunnyMoments2 instead. %%%% %%%%

Several years ago, at the middle of the New Years day, my brother and I were standing outside, and he decided to kick around a random plastic bucket he found on the ground. At that exact moment, someone decided to send up some fireworks... which went off just as his foot hit the bucket. Man, did we laugh! To this day, I can't help bringing this up from time to time.

Another time, he was in school, doing a word labyrinth puzzle in English class. At first, he didn't find any words, and said to himself: "This is hopeless... it's not like I can just put my finger down here *puts finger down on a random place* and get "window"!" ...Guess which word's first letter his finger landed on. The guy just has a natural talent for those moments, it seems.

In one of my classes in my sophomore year in high school, the (usually pretty cool) teacher had us role play as people at a job, while he played the angry customer. This was done infront of the whole class. At one point I said something alog the lines of "The boss isn't here. If you have a problem, you can explain it to me or leave.", so he replied "well you've got some balls, huh?" I couldn't resist saying with a completely straight face, "Big brass ones, sir." Everyone including the teacher laughed their asses off. To top it off, I got an A. That was the start of my class clown career.

I was reading back through a story I wrote when I was younger which was essentially what I didn't realise was SuperMario fanfiction at the time. Reading it, I came across this gem (names censored as they are the names of real people). I laughed so hard it actually hurt: #QUOTE#A blue glowing line zapped from the N64 and engulfed the DS. [NAME]’s hands followed. We stood in shock. [NAME]’s hands and the DS were gone! #QUOTE#[NAME] stood in shock. “M-My-H-Hands!” he stammered. #QUOTE#Phew. Well now it was over, I thought.

Four words: I Want That Chair. Based on a comment Aneel, a boy at my school, said, Steve, my teacher, remixed it and turned it into a hilarious song. Enjoy. Why does he want that chair? He likes that chair. Its his favorite.

This troper was in the car with his brother when the announcement came on that Irish mob kingpin James "Whitey" Bulger had been captured. #QUOTE#Brother: What's the Irish mob? #QUOTE#Me: It's like the Italian mob, but with worse food