This troper is a juggler, and words cannot begin to describe how tired he is of "You have a lot of/big balls" jokes.

ThisTroper's nickname is Trip, a rare but not unique name for a person who is a third as in father and grandfather have the same name (triple, trip, get it?) Puns now come as a BerserkButton, from "Don't trip!" to "Don't be triping" to "Have a nice trip!" Seriously, 10 % of the time someone makes a pun when I first meet them, and 30 % if I know them for a week... If the opportunity arises, they use it.

You get many ''Enterprise'' jokes?

Yes, I know, switching majors from Computer Science to English Literature is a big change. Why would I bother changing to, say, an engineering department if Computer Science wasn't working out?

This Troper's name is Nick, and has vowed never to date someone named Nikki... again.

Same here. We got sick of the Nic and Nick jokes.

I have a friend whose last name is Mann. Occasionally upon seeing him, I start singing "Suffragette City" by DavidBowie. "Hey, Mann, oh, leave me alone..." He still thinks it's funny.

I had a friend years ago named Richard, and his older brother was named Keith. Surprisingly, barely anybody made any references to this (partially because at the school I attended, the only music people knew about was from the last five years). On the other hand, I will either beat somebody like a crying child in a department store, or make them run like prune taste-testers with a stomach virus if I have to hear any more quotes from HomeAlone about my name. (Although actually, that hasn't occurred in nearly 14 years, so . . . I can let it go).

This Troper ''has'' one of the names listed in the main article, and refuses to answer to it anymore. People not only refuse to respect a polite request to ''not'' make the joke every time the name is mentioned, they become offended she doesn't find the joke amusing; even after explaining she's heard the joke since she was 12 years old and it wasn't even funny then. Until she came up with something else she'd prefer to be called, she had to react like joking about her name was a BerserkButton to get people to stop doing it.

This troper also has a younger sibling whose first name is Kristal. She had to throw a fit to prevent her mother giving her the middle name "Claire" to avoid this sort of thing.

...this troper's preferred name of address tends to get a certain sequence from ''ThePrincessBride'' quoted at her, but she doesn't mind that at all; it's one of her favourite movies.

Huh. Inigo Montoya is a weird name for a girl :P

One branch of relatives I have all share the last name "Beers". They're positively sick of all the jokes that are made from that.

Diamonds, right?

I once knew a fellow with the last name "Hyman". You can imagine the kind of jokes he had to suffer...

I'm Dutch and one of my former teachers French was called Hyman. Hij man roughly translates from Dutch to English as 'he man'. The irony? She's female.

Perhaps a Real-Life aversion isn't the most appropriate thing, but being as I am the only Willis I've ever met (aside from my father), I don't understand how I made it through life without ever being asked what I was talking about. It helps that from high school onward, I started going by "Will" instead.

This coming from someone who had to suffer the endless stream of "(Blank) the Dick" jokes. Rick, Mick, Vick, etc. For that matter, guys named Richard probably get similar treatment. Part of the IncrediblyLamePun trope.

Yes... ''dear sweet mercy'', do men named Richard have this problem. Most of us introduce ourselves with our preferred nicknames for that very reason.

I pity Richard Head.

Actually, this troper's father and a friend of her brother's/the neighbour kid don't mind it. We used to call them Big Dick and Little Dick to differentiate. "Little Dick" often has his friends say "Have you seen my Dick?" to other friends, and finds it amusing.

This troper's father only lets his parents and sister call him Dick and Dicky. He is scary enough that no one else tries.

This troper's mother knew a man named 'Harry Richard.'

My father worked with Dick Johnson. His nickname was "Redundant".

I've done lazier. This troper's friend is named Chris, and the only thing I can rhyme it with is Piss. Therefore, Chris the Piss.

ThisTroper knew someone by the name of Michael Hunt. Woe betide anyone who called him ''Mike''.

This Troper's last name is Rutch. A solemn vow never to name a child Michael has been taken.

ThisTroper is deadly serious when he mentions that he went to a school with a Michael Hawk. He also knows a Harold Schlang.

On the topic of Mikes, This Troper started getting very annoyed one semester when apparently the entire rest of the student body started thinking it was hilarious that one Mike's last name was "Litt." It was only (slightly) bearable because he didn't get it at the time, but ''no one'' would let it die. The fact that the poor guy was running for a high student government position didn't help.

I share my first name with the crab from ''TheLittleMermaid''. Because the first letter of my surname begins with an S, I always include my middle name when I give my initials, because you'd be amazed how many people invoke GodwinsLaw the moment they hear the phrase "SS".

Please, oh please tell me your middle name is Oscar.

It makes ''me'' think of souped-up Chevys...

TruthInTelevision for me. "Angel". I've heard both the sincere ones when I do good things and the ironic ones when I do morally gray to bad ones. Whatever I do, I get a HurricaneOfPuns.

I'll remember never to ask you about happy clauses or sunlight and wooden stakes.

This troper knows a guy named Angel too. Since no one where I live knows squat about Buffy, they just make cracks about the fact that it's a girl name (As he'd tell you, IT'S UNISEX!). And then he came out of the closet.

People have an odd tendency to start singing Scarborough Fair whenever they hear one troper's name, especially the chorus ''"Parsley, Sage, '''Rosemary''' and Thyme..."''

Looove grows where my Rosemary goes...-flees-

And just wait until you have a baby...

Yeah, NeverHeardThatOneBefore either. Including variations of "Just remember, protect your baby."

This troper has a name which prevents her from eating apples in peace. Her cousin, six days younger than her, is named Adam. It wasn't planned. She has found that wearing snake jewelry helps deflect the idiocy.

You could also point out that it probably wasn't an apple.

This troper's last name is "Daly", and jokes about newspapers have never, ever been funny. Or anything else done daily. Also, while my name is longish and Welsh, it is pronounced (like nearly all ancient languages) exactly phonetically, and nobody can ever, ever say it right the first time. But the thing that has truly become a BerserkButton for me is that I have dual citizenship -- British and American. My American friends have taken to saying some variation of, "It's because you're British" whenever I do ''absolutely anything'' remotely out of the ordinary, say something slightly strange, or even just whenever they feel like it. It's gotten to the point that, while I am proud of my heritage, anyone uttering the beginning of that phrase gets yelled at and/or hit peremptorily. Apologies can be tendered later if necessary.

This Troper is a first aider/EMT, and there are always a few comedians who stop outside her post and pretend to have heart attacks. It was funny the first time. Your impression is ''not'' the first time.

There are remote African tribesmen who will put to death any man found uttering "Jesus saves. ...Everyone else takes full damage."

Jesus saves on a 2+ .

Preemptive strike to avoid this: Michael Fox changed his middle initial from A to J to prevent jokes along the lines of "Michael's A Fox."

This troper had heard "Amelia Bedilia" one too many times back in elementary school. She thought it was over until her friends started a short conversation about it at lunch one time. She also plays the double bass, which invokes similar responses to the example at the top of the page (it varies between violin and flute, mostly) and she's also tired of people staring and pointing at her as she walks around the school hallways and asking her if it's heavy when she carries it around. DON'T ASK THAT IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA OFFER TO CARRY IT FOR ME! My sister's name is Stella. She has been called Stellaluna in elementary school. More recently: Stella Bella (for some reason) and STEEEELLLLAAAAAAAAAAAA!

My sister in law is named Stella, and became tired of A Streetcar Named Desire before ever seeing it.

This troper's name is Katie Holmes. Tom Cruise jokes have never been funny. I would spite my parents, but the actress...wasn't an actress when I was born, so they didn't know any better. My mother's name is also Lois, and to her, Clark Kent jokes have never been funny, either.

This troper's last name is [=McDonald=]. No, I don't have a farm, and no, you cannot have fries with that.

This Troper's last name is Howe. Many times has he been the recipient of the phrase, ", Howe are you doing?" Admittedly, this is mostly done by his friends to screw with him, so they are fully aware he HAS heard it one hundred times before.

An interesting cross-cultural example. My friend lives with some Polish people and a Spaniard named Alphonse Jesus. As "Alfons" is Polish for 'pimp', they call him Jezus (pronounced Jeh-zoos, as Polish for you know who). The funniest thing is, that he wouldn't object if not those nasty evil Poles.

The standard response to anyone seeing or meeting AliceCooper in real life is, apparently, "We are not worthy!" Alice himself has gone on the record saying that it's better than what people ''used'' to call out to him, based on one of his album titles... "Hey, Stoopid!"

This troper's last name is Goodall. There is a small mass grave building up in his backyard of people who have asked him whether he is ''good all the time.''

How're the gorillas? *Runs and hides*

You know...that's one that's barely used. You may live. ''For now.''

Chimps, she studied chimps!

This troper's last name is "Curley." Yes, I've noticed that my hair is straight, and if you ask about Larry and Moe, ''I WILL DESTROY YOU.''

How about Lennie and George? (from "Of Mice and Men").

This troper was on the Von Braun team at Space Camp. Whenever she mentions that to anybody, they quote Tom Lehrer. She has a sneaking suspicion that the councilors are fully aware of this and only name teams that because he originated the idea of Space Camp.

Wow, that many people are familiar with Tom Lehrer? Surprising.

This troper is going to cut the next bitch who calls her Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm. Or Becky, for that matter, but that's another trope. And the team she follows has a thing for this, too, of which the most egregious example is 'Whatchu talkin' about, Willis?' when this player scores.

This troper has a hit out on Scott Baio, and thinks George and William are perfectly good names for the Crown Prince of the UK.

This troper's first name is Robin, and was tormented with Batman and Robin Hood jokes as a child. Now pretty much anyone who makes the same joke gets a growled 'don't call me that' as a response. And that's one of the LESS annoyed responses.

JChance: Preach it. Usually more of a profound eyeroll than a growl for me, but, yes, that one got old in grade school. Also add (in business calls) "Is Robin there? Can I talk to her?" Also add that my last name, despite being longish and Scottish, is spelled phonetically and still no one can pronounce it on the first go.

This troper and his friend (both called a variation on the name Robin) have had ''very'' bitchy discussions about this. All those jokes stopped being funny very quickly, if they were ever funny at all. Our 'top' four are Batman, birds, Robin Hood and stealing (robbin'. HAHAHAHA). This troper has bemoaned the fact that no-one has ever made a Reliant Robin or Robben Island joke, because they'd at least be imaginative and fresh.

How's WinnieThePooh? *dashes off*. ** I knew someone from school whose name was Robin Marks. Guess what he got accused of doing a lot.

Leaving three-toed footprints in the snow?

A non-name example - anyone noticeably taller than their companions has already heard "How's the weather up there?" more times than they care to remember. This would probably bug us more if not for the fact that we're fairly sure that everyone else is just jealous.

I eventually just started spitting on them and said "It's raining"

This troper got tired quickly of being asked if he played basketball solely because of his height.

"No. Do you play miniature golf?"

This troper's new roommate has the last name of "Doodah." For serious. She is surprisingly good-natured about the constant stream of people whistling "Camptown Races" around her.

This troper's first name is Shane. Yes, I am aware of just about an entire rhyming dictionary's worth of words that rhyme with Shane. Yes, I have heard people ask me to "Come Back, Shane!". Yes I am aware it is easy to confuse with Sean. It doesn't help that my middle name lends itself to to many drunken Irish jokes and my last name sounds like a certain buzzing insect and/or a particular character on {{Transformers}}. Sigh. What were my parents on when they decided to name me, I ask you?

You all think you have problems? When this troper was in third grade the Prime Dog Food people started a new ad campaign raising a puppy on Prime Dog Food. They named it Margo - yes this troper's name is Margo and she was the Prime Puppy for THREE whole grades! Needless to say she has never used Prime Dog Food.

And then there's my friend Luke. Once Luke went to one of those restaurants where they take your order then announce when it's ready over an intercom. In Luke's case what he heard was 'Luuuuke - I am your father!'

InsectGenderBender always really bugs me.

Pun intended?

Real life aversion? Sure, the other guy did it. Somehow I rarely get any whatever Trevor jokes, and my brother rarely get jokes regarding his initials, which are B.S. by the way.

Lucky you. Back when trevor/ Magical Trevor first came out, I can't tell you how many people would start singing that song once they learned my name.

This troper is subject to something else (no one can ever spell her name right and friends love coming up with ridiculous nicknames), but she often teases her brother by comparing him to a certain pink starfish. She's the only one he really gets it from, but it annoys the hell out of him when she pats him on the head and says "Pats for Patrick!"

Variation averted: Same troper, but amazingly enough, despite the fact she and her brother are red-heads, they almost never get the usual red-head nicknames (including the confusing "carrot-top") except when people say "You must get called carrot-top a lot." Maybe people assume they hear it a lot, and figure it will end up with them as a bloody heap on the ground.

If you know someone afflicted with the name 'Tom Jones', please do ''not'' assure them that said name is "not unusual". It will not end well.

Averted/Inverted? This troper calls his friends by weird variations on their names, which they've just accepted because they've heard them a thousand times. His circle of friends includes such folks as Davidinov, Davidistan, Matthias/Mattibald/JazzBand, and the Jerms.

I'm Thomas, and I will pistolwhip the next guy who mentions tank engines.

Is it safe to mention robots?

How about doubting? (This troper is also a Thomas, and got that a few times...)

Yes my name is German, no that doesn't mean I am, your name is David that doesn't result in me asking if you're from the middle east now does it?

This Troper's last name means "German" in his native language. Godwin's Law gets invoked quite a lot, though usually as means to annoy him, rather than to joke about it.

This troper suffers from partial deafness and when meeting new people has to explain that he does so that they'll talk at him rather than to him. Invariably the words "I'm deaf" will be met with a quickly uttered "What?" and a self-satisfied 'how funny am I?' grin. Depending how drunk he is this troper usually replies with a loud "haha, do you dance in front of cripples too?" or a straight punch in the mouth.

In everyone's defense: I was once confronted with this situation (being told by a person "I'm deaf"). My immediate response was "What?" or some variation thereof ("Hmm?" "Huh?") to which she didn't respond, either because she didn't see me ask it or because of a similar attitude as the above poster. I didn't say it to be funny, but because she said it very quietly, and frankly it's not the sort of thing a person expects to hear: #QUOTE# Hi. #QUOTE# I'm deaf. :: I wasn't even really sure that what she said was "I'm deaf" but only through interactions with her and seeing her interactions with others did I realize that she was deaf and that was probably what she said. Doesn't help that I have tinnitus which - while not the same as deafness - sometimes makes it hard to hear people if they're LowTalkers. (Sorry about the lenghthy JustifyingEdit but I thought it needed to be said.)

This troper's last name is Keller. No, I am not related to Helen Keller, and it's not funny to ask or assume that I am. As a matter of fact, my whole family only came to the US from Ireland in the twentieth century, so it's pretty much impossible to be related to her.

Unless she's a distant relative.

This troper knows someone whose older sister's name is...''Alyssa Milano''. I wonder how much it gets joked about.

I bet she leads a Charmed life.

This troper's first name is Jedidiah. Jed for short if you wish to die. Make a Jed Clampett joke at your extreme peril. As in I'll gut you and strangle you with your small intestine.

What, no Jedi jokes either?

No. Those are saved for those among us, like me, named Luke. If ''one more person'' says "Use the Force" to me unprovoked, I will ''delete them from existence.'' Or maybe just punch them.

Will it be a ''Force'' punch? *flees*

I will say I've used that on both of my cousins who are named Luke. One hates it and the other enjoys it. The one who likes it is five and his eight-year-old brother is named Jack, and he ''likes'' calling himself Captain Jack Sparrow. I've called him "Captain Jack Harkness" a few times, and I thank God that his parents have no idea what ''{{Torchwood}}'' is, or they would ''kill'' me.

This troper has a friend named Leah, pronounced like "Leia". Making Star Wars jokes around her will result in your death.

This troper's name is George Lucas. My friends used to hum the Imperial March when I walked past.

What about TheWestWing jokes?

Thankfully after highschool I just stopped using Jedidiah instead going by Jay. No more idiotic jokes. Thankfully no one has yet asked about SilentBob.

The next person who makes a Murphy's Law joke around me will be dissected. And then reassembled. Without anesthesia. And all the parts might not end up where I found them.

In doing so, you would most likely invoke your namesake trope and rebuild the person, ''Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster''

This troper's last name is similar to the last name of a certain tractor company owner (though spelled differently, and actually Chinese), and pronounced like it too. So, we get "Hey, are you related to the John Deere tractor people?" ''a lot''.

On top of that, my initials are MD. I get "doctor" jokes all the time. Never mind I can't stand blood in RealLife... But I got off better than my brother, whose initials are ADD. And he happens to have issues similar to that particular disorder. My mother says she didn't mean to do it - I laugh at her lack of foresight.

What band geek hasn't heard the, "one time, at band camp?" joke? This troper heard that joke approximately a bajillion times the summer she went to band camp. No, you aren't creative, and no, it is not funny.

Also, in this Troper's experience, the only thing getting done at band camp is drill and memorization.

I took to replying to that line with, "One time, at band camp, I borrowed a flag from one of the guards and...''whoa''." Most people get far too shocked to formulate a reply.

This troper's brother had an English teacher named Mrs. Hoare. Pronounced "Whore".

This Troper has the last name of Pope. She heard all the jokes, so don't even start.

So. . . written any epic poems about minor social scandals lately?

This Troper has a few to share, involving myself and other people.

My name shares a word with a popular swimming pool game, which I refuse to learn the rules to.

I used to know someone named Adrian. I was allowed '''one''' "Yo, Adrian!" joke.

I used to know someone named Damian. I didn't make jokes, but we discussed the "you get one" phenomenon.

In January 2001 I met a young man named Chad. I didn't make any jokes, but I did say something to the effect of "boy, you must have gotten a lot of jokes at your expense recently," which in retrospect was probably about as bad.

This troper volunteers at an animal shelter. Once we had a cat named Stella. It seemed everyone who met her had to yell "Stella!" It wasn't funny, ever. When she got adopted, there was a collective sigh of relief for more reasons than one.

This troper is convinced his family adopted that cat. Strangely, the joke never came up in this case.

Was it a longhaired cat about ten years old?

With my name being Andrew and my brother being named Jackson, you can imagine which dead president's name I hear a lot. On top of that, I have to put up with the name 'Sherman-ator' from my last name. For that very reason I've avoided seeing the Terminator movies (though that may soon change).

One of my friends is named Sean, and his brother is named Connor. No prizes for guessing what they've had to deal with.

A guy in my Greek class is starting to come under fire for a last name of Lively.

This troper advises people never to refer to somebody named Peter as "Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater" or "Peter Pan." Not only have they heard that one before, it's a potential BerserkButton depending on how many times that particular Peter has heard it.

Are SpiderMan references okay?

My brother's name is Peter, and my mom used to call him "Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater" when he was little; she also used to call him "Handsome" (and still does), so it all evens out. He did not like it when a couple of classmates called him "Peter Pan," though since he has Asperger's Syndrome, he does have that quality about him (I've never actually told him, though). And then I started watching ''Series/{{Heroes}}'', which has Peter Petrelli, which makes things more confusing. Last night, I watched an episode and said, "Peter is a MORON!", and then I realized that my brother was right there, and I started apologizing: "Sorry, sorry, ''you're'' not the moron. (Points to TV.) ''He's'' the moron."

No, I'm not Jake the Peg, diddle-iddle-iddle-um, with an extra leg, diddle-iddle-iddle-um.

This troper's name is Adeel. He had heard the joke: let's make a deal, many, many times in school. The most creative example would have had to have been: 'What did Adeel's parents say before making love'. 'Lets make Adeel'. Harr Harr.

I guess you could call those jokes "Adeel-breakers"! *shot*

Do. No. Compare. This. Troper to the gutter-trash singer that shared the same first name, and had a complete public meltdown, it is an invitation to be spoon-fed your own intestines.

This troper's first name is apparently close enough (though, in fact, a derivative of) to that of a certain bull frog. Who I have had many sing of how said frog was "a good friend" of theirs, etc. etc. This troper's last name is Cox. Being from a town with no appreciable sophistication in the general populace, this troper has heard it all entirely too often.

Jeremy, right? At least you don't get Pearl Jam jokes...

Try having the last name Lavergne (silent G) and being born in 1978, during the height of the popularity of a certain sitcom. Seriously. The name Shirley is, by itself, borderline BerserkButton material.

This troper's last name is Hynes. With a "y." So no, ''not'' like the damn ketchup. Tim the Enchanter references, however, are acceptable.

Yes, my name is similar to that of Tyrus Cobb. No, my parents did not name me after him. And I fucking hate baseball.

How did it take this long to mention the name of Mary here? Long, center-parted brown hair. Blue eyes. Sad countenance. Catholic elementary school. There is a small plot out behind the school, under some lovely shady trees, where they buried the bodies. Do not jest at my expense- I have heard them ''ALL''. (And right now, someone's thinking 'haha, trees... dirt... How does your garden grow?' and is laughing their ass off. You, mister, are dead. I now go by 'Alice', which opens up doors for an entirely different category of jokes...)

Who the fuck are you?

ThisTroper learned the hard way that there are some people you don't go whistling "Danny Boy" at ''all the fucking time''. In retrospect, the guy was completely justified.

Total, ''total'' subversion here: My last name is Nankervis, which sounds kinda like wanker, if you put stress in an odd place. I've been waiting ''years'' for someone to make the pun, and now I'm dedicated to finding a place where I can use it on myself.

This troper's first name is Wayne. Wayne Newton, Wayne Gretzky, John Wayne, Wayne's World... interestingly enough, nobody's actually made a joke out of those in years, but when he was a kid adults (and some other kids) would make these jokes ''all the time''.

This troper's online handle is {{gs68}}. Now, say "[=GameSpot=]" again! SAY. "GAMESPOT." AGAIN. I dare you, I double dare you, muthafucka! Say "[=GameSpot=]" one more goddamned time! (Or [=GameShark=], for that matter.)

GAMESPOT AGAIN!

This troper's initials are MR. Yes, yes, Mr. MR. Yes I've heard it before, since I was four. No it wasn't funny then either.

This troper's last name is Johnson.

At least your first name isn't Harry. My poor, poor, cousin.

This troper gave up fighting his surname of "Makepeace" and just went with it. I now greet people with the peace fingers, allow people to call me "Peace" and have a poster of Lennon displayed prominently in my room saying "Give Peace a chance". That being said, "Makewar Makepeace"/"Dont make war, Makepeace" and other variations are tired and unfunny now. I let people off with one when they first meet me. That being said I did slip into a joke without realising it at a party recently. After breaking up a fight between two drunkards I moaned "Why do I always have to play peacemaker to you two?"... the looks I got...

You're not a colonel, are you?

Are Bartimaeus jokes okay?

This troper is always amazed that people need a real answer to the "Kate or Katie?" question. Seriously people, as long as you don't spell it with a "C" it's fine.

People need an answer because a surprising number of Caitlin/Kaytlin/Cat/Kathrine/Cathrine/Catie/Katie/Cate/Kate/Cat/Kat's flip out if you get their name wrong.

This troper's brother-in-law is a police officer, and she cringes every time someone makes a doughnut joke to him. He's a good-natured guy, but still. Come on, people. Do you really want to be tempting a Main/BerserkButton on someone who ''carries a gun''?

This troper got out one half of a "Victoria's Secret" joke before his best friend with said name dumped a Cookie Fudge Fantasy sundae in my lap. Her reason? "That joke is unoriginal. My responses, however, are quite clever."

The next person who compares this troper to a prominent billionaire with a reality show because we have the same first name is going to be fired. Literally, I vow to pull out a blowtorch and set them ablaze.

This troper's last name is Knox. No, I don't have access to the fort, I've never been to Knoxberry Farms, and I've have no idea what Knox gelatin is for. And as with an above commenter, joking about the "singer" who shares my first name and hair color will bring you pain.

Are mystery jokes okay?

Non-name example. Yes. I work for a pizza place. No, I do '''NOT HAVE A FUCKING PIZZA FOR YOU!''' Stop asking me that when I stop for gas!

This troper used to work the rides at a theme park, measuring children to make sure they were tall enough to ride. Every day, dozens of full grown adults would jokingly ask him to measure them. Every day, he got closer to chucking one of them onto the track.

This troper's initials are R U. Yes, that sounds like "Are you?", and no, pointing that out doesn't constitute a joke.

This troper went to college with a guy named David Crockett, and can only imagine ''his'' childhood.

This troper lived down the street from a David Crockett in Middle Tennessee. Whenever he ordered pizza, he'd have to make up a name or else the establishment would think he was a prank caller.

In a subversion of this, this gay ran-a-website-full-of-penises troper managed to make it nearly 24 years before realizing his last name was one easily typo'd letter away from "boner".

Averted with this troper. His last name is a girl's first name, but ''maybe one person every few years'' makes that joke when they learn about it. They never do it again (no, I didn't force them, the joke just never sticks for some reason)

This troper's first name is Olivia. You'd be surprised at how many people go "Newton-John?". (I'm actually named after de Havilland, but whatever.)

I actually know someone whose name is ''Olivia Newton''. I imagine she's at the end of her tether regarding that joke by now.

There's a girl in my class called Pandora. Poor girl.

I invert this trope all the time. I always say things people never heard before. I once made a huge explanation (complete with SesquipedalianLoquaciousness) about how spilling soup on a guy would cause him to fall from a blimp. I also once said something along the lines of "drill a hole in your head and sodomize you through it with a microwaved glow stick."

This troper's first name is Lamont. When meeting me, a few people bring up Lamont Cranston, the real name of comic book vigilante TheShadow. Most mention Lamont Sanford from ''SanfordAndSon''. After 2 1/2 months on the job, one of my co-workers ''still'' thinks it's funny to say "You big dummy!" every time he sees me...

This troper has the misfortune of being intelligent and being named "Albert". Cue the Einstein comments.

This troper has the initials 'E.T'. You can imagine how many 'Phone Hoooome' jokes she has gotten, and they all think they're SO witty.

Anyone who hears this troper's name for the first time (assuming that it's been pronounced correctly) will invariably break out into a chorus of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat". Said troper has recently been going by a nickname to help stave this off.

This troper's sister has the middle name 'Rose'. It's best not to mention Titanic around her.

What are your feelings about ''Series/DoctorWho''?

Shines}} This troper has been using this online handle for at least six years. She knows what it means in Japanese. Yes, Gundam. She knows. Oh god, she knows.

And then we have this one troper who could have taken this one in so many ways, but has so far only gotten Christopher Robin and Murray the Talking Skull references. There were a LOT more possiblities that he found out first by himself. Anyone using those two will be thrown into a lion's den.

This troper knows someone who's surname is "Roche." Pronounced the same as the insect which can survive without a head. Yes, he's heard it all before, but apparently not as much as his relative with the same surname but first name "Harry."

I knew someone with the same surname in pre-school, and his first name was Oakly. Since we were in pre-school and unable to hear or talk well, I though that his name was "Ugly" for quite a while and called him that (I guess he didn't notice for the same reasons), yet this never struck me as funny. The mix-up was finnaly sorted out when I was invited to his birthday party and my mom saw the invitation; I had told her that he was called "Ugly:.

This troper's first name is also the name of a popular song. Her surname is in the well-known theme song to a popular cartoon. It's gotten to the point where it's "I wonder which one they'll sing"?

This troper enjoys Park}} one particular television series. However, sometime during its early seasons, they decided to add a character whom shared the same name as me. This would normally be fine, except that particular character was a wheelchair bound boy who could only yell his one name repeatedly. It still follows me to this day

This troper knew a girl in high school with the last name of Blonder. She had brown hair.

...which would make her '''blonder''' than someone with black hair. *runs*

This troper has a co-worker who goes by his last name, Montoya. We don't mention that "Inigo" guy.

...because you're not prepared to die? [hides]

This troper's younger sister is named Josephine and has gone by "[=JoJo=]" her whole life. Once, when she was about four, my mom said her name while they were in a store, and a little boy said, "Hey, like Mojo Jojo!" She has also been asked if she has a circus (like in that Disney Channel show for little kids that's called ''[=JoJo=]'s Circus'' or something like that), and when that ditzy popstar [=JoJo=] Levesque showed up, I felt like screaming until I broke glass (my own sister is more talented than that chick). I have since found references to other [=JoJos=] in a Beatles' song, ''Across The Universe'', and ''Pepper Ann'' (Uncle Jojo). I'll add that when my sister was born, my Victorian, control freak grandma (on my dad's side) told my mother, "Well, you finally got your Jo," referring to Jo March in ''Little Women'' because my mother was a tomboy when she was younger and she's still athletic now.

... I don't suppose she has bizarre adventures?

Well, sometimes living with her feels like one big, bizarre adventure.

This troper has a double whammy. He has a first named that is spelled differently so people can't pronounce it correctly until he teel them how to. Then because of a certain Brady Bunch sister and a stupid movie about cheerleading, he had to suffer fron the stupid jokes. This is until he got fed up one day and "convinced" the last person to not make those jokes anymore.

This troper has the last name 'Little'. If I hear one more person asking if I have a little brother called Stuart I will hit them. Unfortunately, my name can also be anagramed into 'A Little Car'. It's not even a very creative anagram.

This troper is named Steven in real life. He is not named Stevie, Stevie Wonder, or Steeeeeve Mother-Truckin Polychronopolis. He is not a member of the Rare Hunters, he does not hunt crocodiles. You are not permitted to call him Steve unless you have seen him naked. That is all.

This troper's last name is Mooney. When she was little, lunar jokes abound, but they have stopped. Surprisingly, no one has made werewolf jokes about her. Or moonstruck ones.

Are we allowed to say that it's a gas?

Do you have a mad eye?

Quit making fun of her, guys, it's probably her time of the month. *shot*

Shooting's too good for you. For you, it's POW! Straight to the moon!

Another non-name example, this troper is a vegetarian. YES. I. CAN. EAT. ANIMAL. CRACKERS.

This Troper's name is Damian. Make an Omen joke, or misspell it without decent reason, and you'll find out just why people think gamers are so violent.

This troper was surprised that, while having the last name of Craze, he was actually only on the receiving end of one joke, which is as follows: "Hello Mr Crazy." Needless to say, I was more embarrassed for the insulter than for myself. Kids were apparently more creative in my father's day however, when he would walk past, they would comment: "There goes a passing Craze."

This troper got tired of people singing "Dammit Janet" at her long before she saw the movie.

This troper has become resigned to the fact that mentioning she's from Utah leads to the inevitable "Are you Mormon?" (answer: no) and has occasionally encouraged people who were obviously suppressing the question to go ahead and ask.

Can someone PLEASE tell me an original joke for Stefan so I can give people something other than just "Hey StefanIE. Hah! Get it?"

Sure, Urkel

This troper has a tendancey to be rather slow and methodical when he's doing things. Unfortunately, his last name happens to be Gonzalez. Hmm? What's that you say? Arriba, arriba, andale? What's Spanish for ''shut the hell up?''

You should totally use "''¡¿Por qué no te callés?!''". Su Majestad Juan Carlos references for the win. (It's pronounced kai-yez, and it's how King Juan Carlos told off Hugo Chavez once. Very funny real-life moment.)

You utter genius, you.

This tropers last name is Stone. No, I am not constantly stoned. No, calling me Stoner is not funny

It's gone this far and no one's mentioned Randy? Usually played straight though I recall one subversion; after reading aloud a romantic/erotic poem in an English Lit. class during the interpretation the Professor mentioned the poem might have been better served had I read it in a "randier" voice. I immediately assumed he was taking a jab at my name when in fact it hadn't occurred to him to connect the two.

Through whatever quirk of fate, this troper has worked with a ''lot'' of extremely kind introverts who take in foster animals; it is ''really'' not worth your time to point out to them that there's anything at all out of the ordinary about having six to eight Cairn Terriers in your house at any given time, or about ordering in Thai food and spending Christmas Day alone with them. They've heard it.

Not really name related, but this Troper is a bit of a nerd. And a dead ringer for Steve Urkel. Guess my Halloween Costume. Guess what everyone asked.

This troper's name is spelled C-A-Y-L-E-Y, pronounced "Kaylee". That's an unusual way to spell it you say? I hadn't realized. Well, ma'am, I didn't know my name was so pretty...It's not like the school secretary told me that when she wrote up my hall pass ten minute ago.

Is it too late to say "we're sorry?"

This troper's sixth-grade school picture features a DeathGlare because of this trope (my name is Ariel and it was three years after TheLittleMermaid came out). In the photographer's defense, it's actually a much better picture than some of the ones with the artificial smiles...

Be born on the 25th of December. I dare you. Not that you have any control over that. Yes, yes, Christmas baby. No, I don't get "stiffed", given that I celebrate neither. I share a birthday with Jesus? No, He probably wasn't born then. I should start giving my birth date as 25 Kislev, 5739...

You're right about one thing: The date for Christmas was chosen to Christian-ize a Pagan holiday that took place on the same day. Historians estimate that His actual birthdate, if it really did coincide perfectly with the star arrangement, would have been mid-April, 6 b.c. Also, flocks do not graze by night in the winter. No, actually my birthday is in March; people calling Christmas "Jesus's birthday" just zonking ticks me off.

This Troper has a friend born on Christmas Day... called Joe. After reading these troper tales I'm starting to regret always calling him Joesus around Christmas time.

This troper's name is Mary Grace. If you call me "Mary," I will snap. No, I haven't seen ''There's Something About Mary''. Yes, I realize how popular the name "Grace" is right now. You think my name is pretty? So does everyone else? You have a mother/sister/grandmother/aunt/cousin/neighbor/friend named Mary Grace? Wow, all my relatives, friends, and neighbors do, too.

Er, you snap if someone calls you by your first name? It's hardly an unreasonable mistake.

It's an identity thing--"Mary" just isn't me--it's kind of hard to explain. Also, "Mary+ Middle Name" was quite common for a long time, so you'd think some people would remember that, but it seems that they forgot about it when people started giving their kids exotic names and/or surnames, even though the name "Grace" has been pretty popular in this past decade.

Since being referred to by, or even complimented on your given names is somehow a berserk button, I'm not going to do either. I ''will'' remark that you're at least in good company with the 1,500 ''other'' Mary Graces in every city's phone book. Oh, and if it makes you feel any better, I think your name is positively revolting.

Double subverted for this troper, who considers it an honor to set up one-liners for his acquaintances. Unfortunately, the punniest thing about his name are that his two middle initials are TM (yep, I've heard it), so this is sometimes more complicated than it sounds.

This troper's hereosexual life partner's initials are SLT. She and I are the only ones allowed to joke about it. My wife's maiden initials were DMB; same rules. We married recently; now they're DMC. I'm not sure how long before 80s rap jokes are acceptable.

This troper is glad that she doesn't live in an English-speaking country, as her full initials are MRS, leaving the middle name out doesn't help, it's still MS.

This troper's last name is Farnik. You would not believe how many "Fart-niks" she has gotten over the years, it's not even funny. Her maternal great-grandmother's name was Gladys, so she was always called "Happy Bottom" (Gladys=Glad Ass). And her Grandmother was named Elsie, so she constantly got jokes about Elsie the Borden Cow. It could be worse, though- my mother had a classmate whose last name was ''Fluck''. Poor fella...

One of This Troper's names is 'Speed'. I have heard every single joke relating to either quickness or drugs possible twice at the least. It's made worse by the fact that everyone always seems to think they're being dreadfully original.

No ''SpeedRacer'' jokes?

Years ago, this troper was participating in a Monopoly tournament, when he learned that one of his opponents was actually named Maverick. Not being one to resist such an opportunity, I walked on over to him during a break in the action and quipped "Maverick. I'm curious. Who was covering Cougar while you were showboating with this [=MiG=]?" Much to Maverick's credit, he didn't try to hit me, but calmly responded with the correct quote: "Cougar was doing just fine." -This Maverick would like to thank you for your originality. Most people just say "Oh, like the movie" or ask if you've seen it. Which, incidentally, this troper had refused to do until recently.

I '''know''' smoking is going to kill me. At this point, that's the whole idea, dumbass. Personally, my favorite response to this is pretending to utterly freak the hell out and flick the cigarette away, then thank said dumbass profusely for saving my life, as though the fact that cigarettes are harmful was entirely foreign to me. It always gets rid of them.

I get sick of that too, you need a witty response. Here's what I say: "Whatever doesn't kill you, only postpones the inevitable."

Names that tend to provoke the jokes that lead to this StockPhrase being uttered in exasperation:

Adrian - ADRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Alexander - When you meet a guy called like this, make puns about AlexanderTheGreat. They will enjoy it thoroughly and have never heard it before. In Holland, it's even worse; the prince is called Alexander and his wife Maxima. So sure, make jokes about where Maxima is when someone introduces himself as Alexander, when they're Dutch. Hey, it's not like they've heard it a million times already!

Alice - "Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?"

Alvin - "Alvin. ''Alvin...'' '''''AL-VIIINNNN!'''''

Annabelle - there's a well-known and rather annoying song about a girl by that name in Dutch. This troper knows a girl who was actually named for the song.

Annie - "The sun'll come out -- tomorrow!"

"So, Annie, are you okay?"

Benjamin- Its all about us apparently. Also, Ben Franklin and Ben Stein.

Bert/Burt - Some variation on "Where's Ernie?".

Billy - "Billy don't be a hero, don't be a fool with your life..."

Bond - "Good evening, Mr. Bond"

Or "Bond. (Insert First Name Here) Bond."

I've been name James Bond, for obvious reasons I go by my Middle name Ryan. Yeah, I can relate to this trope.

One may feel sorry for the ornithologist James Bond, who was the source of the name for the JamesBond character.

This editor remembers reading somewhere that after the books came out the poor man was pestered ad nauseam by customs officers about where he was hiding his gun every time he crossed the border. Apparently, he took it in stride.

Celia - "...you're breakin' my heart! You're shakin' my confidence daily!"

Caroline - no, no, go ahead and sing that song. She's never heard it before.

Clark Kent - "Hey, where's Lois Lane?"

Douglas/Doug - "What do you call a man with a spade in his head?" An ambulance. You call them a '''''Fucking Ambulance!'''''

Doo do do dododo doo do do do do

*picks up gun*

Ed/Edward/Edwin: Any school child named "Ed" in the late '60s grew to hate TheMunsters. By the mid-'70s, this one was no longer current, but many Eds of that generation still refuse to answer to "Eddie".

Eileen/Aileen- Come on, Eileen. Or the ever popular "Hey, Eileen, you've got something white on your dress." (Think about that one for a second)

Ella - "Ella, Ella, Ella, eh? Eh? Eh?" Or, alternatively, ''EllaEnchanted''.

Emmanuelle - yes, some girls are actually called that.

Ernie - Some variation on "Where's Bert?".

Fletcher - Liar}} "Hows it hanging?"

Forrest - "Run, Forrest, run!"

Try being a runner. I am going to MAUL the next person who says it.

Fox/Foxx - Emilia, Laurence, Megan, Samantha, John E. Sanford, Michael, Matthew, and Jamie must all be sick of the line "I'm looking for a fox".

Georgia - "Georgia on my mind."

Grace - AmazingFreakingGrace

Or Grace Kelly

Jack - "ROOOOOOSE!"

Jake - "Where's the extra leg?"

Jane - "Hey, where's {{Literature/Tarzan}}?"

Janie - "Janie's got a gun! Better run!"

Jeanne or Jeannie: #QUOTE# "Hey, grant me a wish!" #QUOTE# Jokester sings the ThemeSong to ''IDreamOfJeannie'' #QUOTE# A long, anguished scream of ''Jeeeeeeaaaaaan''! #QUOTE# "The low life has lost its appeal..."

Jeremiah: "was a bullfrog"

Jenny: "Jenny, I got your number"

Jimmy - "Jimmy crack corn and I don't care!"

Jo: Jo March or Jo Harvelle

[=JoJo=]: Mojo Jojo, "[=JoJo=] was a man who thought he was a loner...", the popstar Joanne "[=JoJo=]" Levesque, or possibly a number of clowns.

Or ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORAAAAAAAA!

Jude - "Hey Jude, don't make it bad."

Katrina: If you know anyone by this name and are feeling suicidal, sing "Walking On Sunshine" at her.

And mention a certain hurricane, while you're at it.

This particular Katrina has actually never had "Walking On Sunshine" mentioned to her, and would probably find it amusing. Do not, however, mention the hurricane.

I know a Katrina. Once, completely forgetting about the hurricane, I told her that her looks completely blew me away. Cue awkward stares...

To that I add the continual confusion as to weather or not Kate and Katie are interchangeable monikers. They are.

Kenneth #QUOTE# "Oh my God, they killed Kenny!" #QUOTE# Or "What's the frequency, Kenneth?"

Girls named Lola tend hate anyone singing a particular Kinks song at them.

Or Barry Manilow: ''Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl..."

And don't forget that "Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets".

This Troper's LAST name sounds like "gets" and her first name is substituted quite a bit...

Lucy - ''ILoveLucy'' #QUOTE# "Lucy, you got some 'splaining to do!" #QUOTE#Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds

On the first episode of MTV's ''Rock the Cradle'', one of the judges told Lucy Walsh that "I love Lucy", and she responded with "Never heard ''that'' one before."

Luke - LukeIAmYourFather.

Marcia - "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia..."

Maria - "''Maria! I just met a girl named Maria!''"

"How do you solve a problem like Maria?"

Mario - "Where's Luigi?"

Mary - "There's Something About Mary."

Or "Mary, Mary, Why You Bugging?", or "Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary", or "Mary Had a Little Lamb".

Michelle - #QUOTE# ''Michelle, ma belle, Someday monkey won't play piano song''. #QUOTE# More correctly, ''Michelle, ma belle, sont les mots qui font tres bien ensemble'': ''Michelle, my beauty, these are words that go together very well.'' Yeah, it sounds better in French.

Myfanwy - "Rum and coke, please, Myfanwy."

Or a certain pterodactyl.

This British troper is called Myfanwy. ''Little Britain'' came out when she was in high school, and the ensuing humiliation was positively a relief given the previous ten years' worth of fanny jokes. (Americans, bear in mind that it's a lot ruder in the UK.) The pterodactyl, she can stand.

Noah - This troper is ashamed to admit he once met someone called Noah and on learning his name asked: "So how's the ark?"

Owen - "Hey, Owen, how's it goin'?"

Paul - Any Christian with this name will probably at least get looked at whenever the apostle by that name (probably his namesake) is mentioned.

Peter - usually associated with Peter Pan, but also Peter "SpiderMan" Parker, and now, possibly Peter Petrelli from ''Series/{{Heroes}}''. So either you'll never grow up, you can climb walls and sling webs, or you have prophetic dreams and throw yourself off buildings.

This Troper actually knows someone who's name is Peter Parker.

Phil - Dr. Phil. Dear God, Dr. Phil. Also anything involving the word "fill". Thank God "Phil of the Future" died out...

Pleasant. This troper's last name, and has been used as jokes about the weather, one's attitude, peasant, pheasant, present, and much, much more.

What about Skulduggery?

Ray/Raymond. EverybodyLovesRaymond, RainMan, Ray-Ban (sunglasses), Ray of Sunshine, "You can call me Ray, you can call me Jay" (And no, you can't call me Jay, dammit!)

Robby/Robbie - the robot. That damn robot.

Robin

"Hey, Robin, where's Batman?"

''Fly, Robin, Fly''!

Rose - 'By any other name'

And now the song "FANTASTIC Rose!"

"JAAAAACK!

Roxanne - "''You don't have to put on the red light''!" There were also several rap songs with this name, and those get quoted a bit less.

Shane- Geeze, I'm only going down the hall for a drink of water. I'll be back

Stella - STELLAAAAAAAAA!

Susanna - "Oh, Susanna, why don't you cry for me?"

Timothy - ''TIMMY!!''

Some call him... Tim?

I hate going to Christmas Parties... I always get asked to say ''that'' line...

Tony/Toney-- "Frosted Flakes are more than good, they're grreat!" I swear, next time I hear that one, I'm gonna gouge someone's eye out.

Or possibly Tony Soprano.

Valerie - "Why don't you come on over, Valerie?"

Wilma #QUOTE#''"WIIIIIILLLLMMMAAAAA!!"''

This Troper knows someone whose name is Victoria Bell, and must fight every time she hears the name to avoid making {{Pokemon}} jokes.

Speaking of which..This troper's name is Ashwin. Ha, you mean like Ash from Pokemon? ('cause he wins a lot? Haha!) Oh god no.

Would it be better if we yelled "This is my boomstick!" when we see you?

This troper has a friend (a ''male'' friend) called Ariel. When it's not ThundarrTheBarbarian, it's TheLittleMermaid.

My name is Simon. It gets old. If you meet someone named Simon, spare him. Please.

You didn't say "Simon says".

WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE???

Is it the "drawrings" thing?

This troper has extraordinarily long hair. Everybody she meets wants to know how long it took to grow it. ''Everyone'', regardless of language or culture.

Seconded. This troper worked in a tourist shop in a tourist-city, frequented by people from ''all over the world''. And still..."How long is your hair?" (Just long enough to reach the top of my head.) And, of course, the constant: "Wow. You have long hair." (What? When did that happen?!)

Oh my god, I'm so glad I'm not the only one. "Wooow, your hair is so long and beautiful!" Sure, it's a compliment, but one that gets tiring. Especially when you whisper about it as I walk past. I'm not deaf, people.

Did y'all know, there's this charity, and you can donate your hair to make wigs for cancer patients? Believe me, we are ALL aware of this fact, as we are told it every. single. day. Sure, it's a nice thing to do, but the charity doesn't actually use most of the hair you send in, and most people with long hair I know have already donated at least once (myself included). Plus, if you want to make wigs so bad, grow your own hair out. It's our hair. Sorry, rant over.

This Troper is a Nuclear Engineer. No, we do not glow in the dark.

In retrospect, this troper should have expected nicknaming oneself 'Zaratustra' on the internet would lead to endless 'Thus spake' jokes.

Honestly, with a name like that, you should have just put "Thus spake Zaratustra" in your sig. You were practically ''begging'' for it.

This troper used to use the screen name ''Mystress'' a few different forums. Frequent joking about this username standing for ''My Stress'' has prompted me to adopt it as a sort of pet name.

This troper's best friend is named Beavis. [=ProTip=]: Never, ever ask "Hey, where's Butt-Head?" or snicker "Uh, huh huh. Huh huh." to him, unless you want a gaping hole in your chest where your heart used to be.

This troper feels extremely sorry for two people: One is talented Australian actor JackThompson, and the other is Michael Phelps' dad. Why? His name's Fred.

After hearing jokes that creationism is like {{The Flintstones}} over and over, this troper agrees we should stop believing in creationism, if only to get rid of these monotonous jokes.

This troper is six feet seven inches tall, and I actually quite like it when I meet people and they comment on my height (incidentally, "You're too tall" is a surprisingly common one), because I know two thousand funny ways to respond to such a comment, and can thereby seem far more witty and spontaneous than I really am.

Both this tropers first and last names are subject to this, but we'll just stick with the last name of Howe. The variety of "Howe are you doing!" cracks was really annoying, though it has at least died off to use only by people who are intentially trying to rile me up.

This troper's middle name is "Singer." At about age four I got sick of people asking me what I wanted to be when I grew up. And then they got all offended when I got annoyed at them!

...a sewing machine?

Also, did they know your middle name was Singer? If they didn't, it was probably a legitimate question.

This troper's last name is "Sun." During his childhood years, he heard much singing of "Oh Mister Sun, Sun, Mister Golden Sun..." directed at him. (Thankfully, this stopped happening once he was old enough that his peers didn't want to be caught dead singing the song.)

My first name is Charlie. Stop saying "sorry, charlie." For that matter, don't talk about candy mountain to me. I'm just glad I havent heard a joke about a certain chocolate factory...

Guess the name of my friend who loathes ''Charlie The Unicorn''.

This troper has a friend named Sean. Sean has a brother named Connor. Sean assured me that yes, they've heard it all.

Hrm. This Troper's first assumption was "Sean is often mistaken for John." Which makes it even better.

This troper is a junior military officer who looks substantially younger than his rank would suggest. He is asked his age by virtually ever other soldier he meets. And yes, my parents know I'm here.

This troper's family has a pair of shetland sheepdogs, which look pretty similar to collies. He routinely hears TimmyInAWell variants when he takes them out for a walk.

Another non-name one: This troper (as noted on the SurvivalMantra page) is legally blind in one eye. Although the eye can still see a little, it's sometimes more comfortable to only use the one that doesn't have a big blank space in the central vision, so she occasionally wears an eyepatch at work. She does not know either Jack Sparrow nor Will Turner; she has never walked the plank; she is not a singing cucumber; quit making pirate jokes. (References to Big Boss are much fewer and farther between, but she never minds those because Big Boss is so much cooler than any pirate.)

This troper had a math teacher with the last name of Fontaine. When {{Bioshock}} came out, each student in his class was permitted exactly ONE joke related to said game (not that anyone adhered to that limit, though).

This troper's real name is Thomas Anderson. He was at school when ''TheMatrix'' came out in 1999. Do the maths.

This troper was in a grad-school computer science class with a classmate named Sam Fisher. Yes, he ''had'' heard the SplinterCell references many times.

Ever been in a televised spelling bee? You ''will'' be asked by random people to spell words like "{{antidisestablishmentarianism}}". ''Repeatedly''.

My name is Adam Smith. Yes, I realize there is an economist of the same name. I have for several years.

But do you hate our - ...sorry...

This troper's name is William. No, I don't have wish wellingtons. Also, I wear an Akubra (a broad-brimmed Australian hat). "Howdy pardner" is a '''very original''' greeting and '''nobody''' has '''ever''' thought of it before you.

I once went into a Wendy's that had a cashier named... Wendy! As the guy in front of me asked, "Are you ''the'' Wendy?", I cringed at wondering how many times that day the poor girl had heard that joke.

In all fairness, she probably should have considered that before she got a job there.

This Troper has dwarfism. He has lived in several different places. Without fail, everywhere he has worked has produced someone who thinks it's clever to call him "Big Guy." Yeah.

This page really, ''really'' needs to be longer. Since so many people are going to read the whole thing. But, anyway... My real first name happens to be the same a certain very recongizable advertising mascot. Most people don't put it together right away because I use diminutive form of my name, but I've practiced my rant for the occasions when it comes up. I realized I might've polished it a bit too much, though, when I almost brought embarrassed tears to someone's eyes. I apologized immediately afterward...

My dad has brown curly hair, and for the last ten years or so has had a single grey patch at the front. It's like his hair started to go grey but then forgot what it was trying to do. (Knowing my dad, this is probably exactly what happened.) There is one thing that absolutely everybody says when they first notice this grey patch: "You been painting?" He's very, very tired of it, but too stubborn to dye.

This troper's surname sounds very similar to 'Cool Whip'...a fact that nearly everyone feels the need to point out.

This troper's name is the same as that of a certain witch. Surprisingly, it died down by the time I became a teenager. Then I had to go and wear a witch costume for Halloween.

Sabrina? One of the Charmed ones?

Dr. Quinn jokes are no longer funny around this troper, who isn't a doctor and will ''not'' answer to Mike. And no, she can't fix cars, and she doesn't know anyone named Sam. And God help the person who brings up Hannah Montana. But she has it relatively easy in some respects: she's met a Thomas Moore (utterly sick of Utopia references, being called "Sir", and joking threats of decapitation) and an Annabel Lee (just don't quote Poe around her), and her brother knows a Westley (who just recently broke down and watched ThePrincessBride to see why people kept answering him with "As you wish.")

This Troper is an English Maddison. The jokes about her admittedly questionable sanity were made when she was a child. She will allow one 'Madeline' (which is far more common in England), and at any point after correction, will rip your arms off. Calling her Madeline deliberately is NOT amusing and god forbid you tell her that you prefer it to her own name.

This Troper's last name is pronounced 'oh-tay.' He's very tired of hearing it used in place of the word 'okay.' Fortunately, these jokes are becoming less common, but he recalls one swim instructor in summer school who was particularly fond of it.

For this troper: Yes, I work in a bookstore. Yes, I get to read. ''No,'' I haven't read everything in the store. ''Yes, you're not the first person to ask me that.''

Important message, people: if you know someone who plays a trombone, do not, under any circumstances use the word "tromboner" or any variant thereof. The word is ''trombonist''. Using the first word is not only unfunny and unoriginal, it may well lead to murder with a blunt instrument, to wit, a trombone.

This Troper's last name is Hunger. Yes, really. I've started telling people "All the possible jokes have already been made."

Same if you are coming from Hungary. I've heard it all, I've heard it before, thank you I'm not hungry.

This troper has big bushy red hair and is UNBELIEVABLY sick of the jokes that her friends seem to enjoy making about her so-called "80s hair."

This troper's friend had the misfortune to be named Jonathan Kennedy. Please do not ask him if his middle name begins with an F.

This troper's name is Madeleine. Not Madeline. Madeleine. Not like the books (this troper's name, by the way, is the accurate French spelling). Not like the books at all. No.

Did Madeleine Albright get these jokes too?

This troper's also a Madeleine. Having the Madeline theme song sung at her was her first Berserk Button.

This troper's name is the same as the british coin for two pence. Almost everyone she meets says, "Oh, like in Mary Poppins?". To their credit, no one has ever used it a second time.

If you ever meet an asexual, please give them a break and don't make a comment about amoebas. They've heard it before.

Or plants.

If your name is Sam, people ''will'' add "I Am" to the end of your name. And if you are a musician, after performing a piece (regardless of how serious or melancholy it may be), people will think it is ''hilarious'' to tell you to play it again.

This troper's surname is "Purdy". And he lives in the Southeastern US. His father actually advised him to get used to hearing the obvious joke, because he himself had to put up with it throughout his own life.

This Troper's middle name is Mercedes. And yes, she has heard all the car jokes. However, I actually don't mind, and gently inform them that actually my father chose it because it was Spanish for Mercy. However, only a Spanish person would know that, and even then, they'd probably jump to the car. And no, I don't like my middle name at all, Spanish or not. Moral of the story: NEVER give your child a middle name that is also a well-known brand of something...like a car.

The 10% or so of the general population that isn't a bunch of idiots should know that the car brand was named after the founder's daughter. You may want to point this out to them.

I actually thought of Mercédès (from Bizet's opera Carmen) before thinking about the car brand, but I'm probably the only one.

This Troper has punched out people he's met for the first time for making Star Wars jokes about his nickname.

If your nickname is also Luke, then we should definitely hang out.

My brother who has the first and middle names Boner Jones. People often refer to him as B.J, which really isn't any better...

This troper's parents own a pair of dogs...the official breed name is "Spinone Italiano". Spinone is pronounced "Spin-Own-Ey". Pretty much the first thing it seems that EVERBODY notices upon being introduced to this breed is how close that word is to the Italian icecream dessert Spumoni... For the record, this troper thought it was pretty funny herself until she realized just how often she'd be hearing it.

In this troper's country, there is (was?) a kid's show named "Bassie en Adriaan" (Bassie and Adrian). "Bassies" is a clown. A clown with red hair. He's also fat. This troper has heard the comparison many, many, MANY times.

At one point he grew so sick of it he stabbed the guy who told him the 'joke' in the hand with a screwdriver. No lie.

This troper's last name is Callaway. She's actually surprised that there aren't more jokes about golf made. On the other hand, if you spell it with an O one more time...

This Troper knew a guy with the last name Chipman. His middle name was Alvin. Think about it.

This troper knew a girl named Persephone, who tried to hide under her desk when our sixth-grade history teacher announced that our next unit would be Greek mythology.

This troper knew a girl named Juliet. Enough said. No. ''More'' than enough said.

This trooper ''is'' a girl named Juliet. And she agrees.

My name is Susannah. I will KILL you if you even THINK about it. Some people are even stupid enough to ''ask if I've heard the song''. And on top of that, nobody can ''spell'' it (Susanna, Suzanna, Susana, et cetera), nor can they pronounce it half the time (dammit, people, the A is not ''silent''!!) [/rant]

... I don't get it, what's so special about the name "Susannah"?

Non-name example: This Troper is a cashier. At work, the barcode scanner is a little unreliable. Many people jokingly say "You know, if it doesn't ring up, it's free." It's getting very close to provoking me into a rage resulting in an improvised blunt object sticking out of someone's overly-thick skull, but I need the job so I simply remain silent.

This troper should probably tell you first that she is...not normal. She talks to people nobody else sees, switches between to polar oposite personalities, and is the only person who ever sees the portal to another world called Karfoni at the end of her street. And before you make fun of her, she'd like you to know that she might actually have a mental problem, not that she really minds. Anyway, her two personalities have seperate names (yes, this troper is well aware of how weird that is). They're names are Kitty and Alice. Kitty gets cat-referenced way to often to keep track of, and Alice can't go a day without hearing about Wonderland. The funny part is that the fist time someone asked her if she was going back to Wonderland, she thought they were serious and corrected them. "No, it's called Karfoni...oh."

Actually, separate names for split personalities are fairly common.

This editor's initials are EA. Video game jokes get old after awhile...also, I knew a person whose last name was Potter.

This troper is sick of references to a certain rock opera by TheWho.

Also, references to Thomas the Tank Engine get old very quickly. Every single person who hears my name mentions it, smugly thinking "hur hur hur I'm so witty and original because I noticed you happen to share a given name with a fictional character in a children's book". No one ever seems to work out that everybody says that, and it wouldn't be funny even if they didn't.

And there I'd have gone with the black woman in the old ''Tom and Jerry''s. Thomas? THOMAS!?

This troper's family seems to have a massive problem with this. My name is Lily. Sorry to disappoint, but I wasn't born in a valley, I'm not a tiger, I don't wear pink and white together, water is not my residence, I don't feel lonely when not with my twin sister Pilly. I'm not a ex-junkie pop singer, nor have I had a miscarriage. I did not voice The Friz. I have not been rescued by Peter Pan and Wendy, nor did I give birth to the smegging Boy Who Lived. But I don't mind jokes about being the baby pawn in "Alice's Adventures Through the Looking-Glass." But that's rare. My sister is called Julia. Julia did not get a lot of shit for her name until she called her dog Romeo. Our other dog is William, and the dog before that was Charles. I really question my parents about matters like that.

When I tell someone my last name, I will get at least one of four responses most of the time: "That's a weird name," "What kind of name is that?," "Oh, like [rhyming word, always the same]," and/or "Are you related to...?" The odd thing about the last one is that it's usually ''not'' a famous person I'm being asked about (there is one that I know of, and I've only been asked about him once or twice in my life).

There was a teacher at my high school who had the same last name as I did. No, I was not related to him. Interestingly enough, my biology teacher began to ask this question, and I was preparing to say "no"... only for her to ask if I was related to a teacher at another school... who I actually AM related to. In these peoples' defense, it's not a very common last name and I was only asked by a few people.

The following are not funny to any barista:

"Do you have just plain coffee here?"

"I want the most expensive drink on your menu."

"Why's your small called a tall?" and similar digs at Starbucks terminology. Doubly so if it's jargon that was actually created by the Italians well before Schulz arrived on the scene.

Ordering a Starbucks drink in a non-Starbucks shop, on purpose.

A friend of mine had a classmate whose last name was "Penus". I can only imagine the jokes he had to put up with once everyone reached puberty.

"Subverted in the 2008 remake of Get Smart: Maxwell Smart: Oh gee, Maxi-pad, I haven't heard that one before! *short pause* I never have heard that before, actually."

Well aren't ''you'' lucky. I, on the other hand, have endured the "wit" of my peers for what feels like ages. This is a very common one. This trope was this troper's best friend in middle school.

This troper is, as his handle implies, named Joey. He is not Peter Parker, damn it. But every since the first Tobey Maguire SpiderMan movie came out (when this troper was a photographer for his high-school yearbook), it seems like half of his co-workers and classmates all think it's hilarious to point out the (supposed) resemblance.

This troper's first name is Kirk. Is it any wonder that I developed an irrational hatred for StarTrek and William Shatner before I even entered kindergarten? Making it worse is when people who are knowledgeable about Star Trek find out my middle name: James.

This troper has a last name that is the same as an historical character, which was also used for a fictional character on a popular TV show in the 80s. Just about every time I meet someone and they hear my name, they make a reference to one or both of these people. Every time they do, I act like it's the first time I've heard it (without sarcasm). When they say, "You must have heard that a million times before," I politely say that I have and let it go at that.

Where this troper worked, there was a guy whose last name was [=McKee=]. He was about my age, so I figured he would have also seen the 70s TV series of ''The Incredible Hulk''. I ran into [=McKee=] in the copy room one day. He asked me a question and instead of answering, I said, "Don't make me angry, Mr. [=McGee=]. You won't like me when I'm angry," which is a famous line from the show because Jack [=McGee=] was always chasing David Banner. [=McKee=]'s only answer was, "Okay, I won't," and he went about his work as if nothing had happened. I thought for sure he would have heard this line before, but he hadn't. It was only a few weeks later that I was able to explain to him that it was from a show.

This troper is from South Jersey. Don't even think about cracking wise about it. I have heard every joke you could possibly make before.

This troper's name is Simon. How do you do? What's that? But of course, you are the '''FIRST PERSON EVER''' to call me "Simple Simon." Or in a case of {{Did Not Do The Research}}, you could call me "Simon the Pieman." I've never heard THAT one ever. Like every day of his childhood from his mother.

No, it isn't Halloween.

For the love of fuck, if this troper hears another 'I'm hungry, so I want Emile' joke, he is going to rip somebody's head off, feast on their entrails, wear their skin as a disguise, and then TP their lawn.

Their entrails, you say? Wow, you must have been pretty hungry.

This editor has an example like the Tiffany Aching example on the page; last name is Price, first and middle are unimportant. Following my dad's joke, I half-believe that my last name's "P-R-I-C-E, just like inflation". I have never heard anybody respond to that with more than a chuckle or two, and never heard it from anybody else, nor any other jokes. More relevantly, my baby brother, first name Markham, almost got the middle name Down. Mark Down Price. My mother vetoed it, thankfully.

Are you a Captain?

I know I remind you of a certain fictional character. No, my friends don't have the same names as his friends. I like the show, don't get me wrong, but I like it a lot less when passing people start referencing it to me and calling me by his name. ''I'M NOT HIM''. Also, an acquintance of mine by the name of Stacy wishes that people would stop making comments about how her mom has got it going on.

This troper has the misfortune of sharing a last name with the ButtMonkey of a certain French movie series. I actually have an uncle who shares both the first and last names of this character. Then again, he lives in Norway, so he doesn't get called out on it.

Non-name example: Asking someone with a tattoo "did that hurt" only makes you look oblivious. Ask what it means, ask why they got it, sure, but please don't ask the equivalent of "did having a needle stuck in you hurt?" This troper had had hers for about two days before she was already tired of the "hey did that hurt".

Snappy response: "No, it tickled."

A series of unfortunate events led to all my work shirts being ruined, so I had to wear plain mono-color clothes. Every single customer chuckled as they asked me ''"Hey, do you really work here?".'' '''Every single one of them.'''

I once stopped in to see a teacher and was greeted with "Good Evans, it's you!" I gave the obligatory "har har" before stopping at the realisation that that ''actually was'' the first time anyone had made that joke, in what was then 18 years.

I am known primarily for my abnormally large forehead, but I've learned to live with the all the jokes about it that are made every day by many of my friends, and even to make a few really bad jokes of my own about it. However, when people meet me, they inevitably point out that I do, indeed, have a very large forehead, in a tone of voice that suggests that I may have never noticed before. It gets really, really tiring.

ThisTroper has the charming combination of good lung capacity and bad sinuses, which makes blowing my nose a loud event. Yes, I am aware that it is loud. Yes, I am aware of posible resemblance to noises made by the elephant, moose, and other large bellowing animals. No, I am in no danger of "blowing my brains out". Thanks for putting on a good show, I'll be sure to tip my waitress.

Also, please stop making fun of my knife wound, if for no other reason than the fact that I can still kill you with my good hand.

No ''iCarly'' yet? I can't possibly be the only Carly on TVtropes who's about ready to gouge some eyes over that. I do know a Sam, however I do not know a Freddy (or, for that matter, a Fred), I do not have a webshow, and yes, I have heard it a million times before. Thanks for playing.

You've met her. Though i've only gotten the iCarly joke a couple times.

This troper's name is Josh. In eighth grade, a classmate came to me and said "I'm just joshing with you", in an attempt to invoke this trope. In a subversion, I had ''never'' heard the slang use of my name before, and only after consulting a dictionary did I actually believe him. In addition, people say it to me so infrequently that to this day that I still chuckle hearing it.

Troper's last name is Ivey. Cue the "Poison" nickname, especially since she's female and occasionally dyes her hair red.

This troper had a teacher in highschool whose name was Paul Simon. I always had the incredible urge to ask him where Garfunkel was. I managed to hold back somehow, though.

This troper's parents are named Paul and Mary. When they were still together, they were surprisingly good-natured about being asked where Peter was.

This Troper had dreadlocks and is currently growing a new set. No, he is not religious, let alone a rastafari. Now how about shutting the fuck up?

This troper's last name is Van Horn. Yes, that is almost the same as horny, a euphemism for sexual arousal. Ha. Ha. Also, I drive a sedan, and while I know it's not a common name, I'm probably not related to that one guy you know.

Non-name example: Yes, my family is from Ozark, Missouri. No, I don't want to have sex with my cousin.

This Swedish troper is called Clara, and spent her early school years going by "klara färdiga gå", which means "ready, set, go" in Swedish, but it petered out when it had gotten old. The problem is people ''now'' calling her that, ten years later, and the reflex she has to inflict harm on whoever does it. Though the worst problem she has with her name is that it rhymes with her mother's. Try answering the phone, and everyone mistaking you for her. She's gone through too many conversations to count pretending to be her mother, because some people are really, really, ''really'' thick.

As an aspie who has had to explain his symptoms a lot to my friends, I've gotten used to hearing "Ass-Burgers" a great deal. I've taken spelling it out as a CatchPhrase.

Yes, being born on the 29th of Februrary means I only get a birthday once every four years. No, that does not mean I'm "technically" 4.

If you see someone who works in the toy department of a department store, DO NOT joke about them playing with the dolls.

Whenever I have to say my last name for anything, I am now automatically rewired to say "Sandham, like 'sand' and then 'ham', ''yes,'' I was called Sandwich as a child."

My name is Scott. Yes, I am aware that there is a song titled "Scotty Doesn't Know." At least the AustinPowers jokes fell out of style.

This troper similarly refuses to acknowledge beaming requests.

This troper's last name is "Osgood." Which means I am constantly called something that has to do with "bad" or "TheWizardOfOz." A common joke among me and my family is that these people are so mind-bogglingly uncreative.

My sister's friend is named Katiee Perry. Nobody cares that it's spelled differently.

Being named "Al" leads to many, many bad jokes whenever quantities of "L" are brought up in Physics or Maths.

I got two. One: People are conviced my last name is Flage (Making me Cammi Flage) and "Hey, Stilwell, are you Still Well?" FacePalm.

This troper is a Front Desk Attendant, and on behalf of all attendants, receptionists, drive through workers, etc - stop telling us it's nice/cold/windy/raining/snowing/etc outside. We know. The last 300 people said it as they passed by.

Every now and then, I watch one of the new ''{{Lost}}'' episodes with some friends who are really into the series. I myself am not into the show, having only seen about four episodes of it total. So every time I watch a new one, my friends assure me that I'm going to be totally... well, you know.

My roommate's surname is Freese. Gym teachers like using it as a command.

This troper's first name is Ashley. Woe betides anybody who ask for Mary-Kate, or cracks related jokes.

My surname is Palmer. I make the jokes myself--it'll often be other people who likely haven't made the correlation.

A non-name one, however, is that if you're asking to go to the toilet, someone at my workplace will at some point say "Don't fall in."

Yes, this troper's name is Zoe. Yes, like the Salinger book. No, she has not read it. And thanks to hearing that question constantly, she never will if she can help it.

This troper, also named Zoe, used to hear frequently about "that girl on that show- Oh, hey, did you hear she got pregnant?" (Somehow, it's also really funny to misspell/mispronounce my name on purpose after I've told you how it's written.)

I have a last name of Lott. Cue endless jokes about "a lot of us," parking, vacant, empty...

The jokes have stopped now, but for about 5 years, this troper heard WAY too many comparisons to a certain woman involved in a presidential scandal. ''{{Friends}}'' jokes will pop up occasionally as well, though since they're rare they're not as bad.

This troper's last name (Mott) has made me irrationally irritated by questions about apple products.

Also, as an animal rights advocate, I get very sick of the line "PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals!" A. I don't even support PETA, AND B. It's NOT. FREAKING. ORIGINAL!

No castle jokes? Bah!

Any Series/DoctorWho jokes?

This troper has been working at a candy store for 4 years, and sees that a ''lot'' of customers have the same tired lines.

"I feel like a kid in a candy store!"

"I'll have one of everything!"

"It's like I've died and gone to Heaven!" (Fun fact, apparentely all of these people are forgetting you have to ''pay'' for the candy. Heaven better not require payment.)

"If the candy doesn't scan, is it free?" I'm not even sure why this one was ever considered witty in the first place. What kind of assumption is that, anyway?

This troper is 4'11" and, when making new friends, will ALWAYS hear "Wow, you're short!" at some point, or a nickname regarding my height. I've heard 'em all.

This troper has the last name of "Byas". At this point it's not so much the frequent accusations of being biased that bother me, it's the fact that ''every single person who makes that joke thinks they're being so original.''

My name is Kimmy. '''''They''''' tended to call me {{Kim Possible}}. For your sake, you better not.

Yeah, so we've got another Troper named Luke here, required StarWars comment, let's move on.

I attended my first professional baseball game recently with, a Dodgers game. One of the players is named Casey Blake, and so this conversation ensued: #QUOTE#Me: Hey, his name is Casey! #QUOTE#Friend:...Yeah. #QUOTE#Me: So he's {{Casey At The Bat}}! #QUOTE#Friend: *facepalm* I bet he's {{never heard that one before}}.

This Troper's real name is Arnold. And yes, "I'll be back," and "Hasta la vista baby" references are so clever. Never heard them once in the last, oh, 20 years or so. The "Put the cookie down!" meme isn't quite there yet, but it will be.

Where's Helga?

Maybe you should have stayed home today.

This Troper and a couple of his friends ride unicycles. I can't tell you how sick we are of people asking where our other wheel is. Of course, whenever we hear that comment we are obligated to do that fake laugh thing. On a related note: No. We are not going to learn juggling next.

This troper is a nexus of such jokes. My name is Luke, and the first two letters of my last name are Sk. Consequently, I get the standard fare of Star Wars jokes (good thing I'm a fan). Next, I'm short. Four feet tall, no dwarfism or anything. This makes me a halfling/hobbit/munchkin/whatever. I am not Short tempered, rather the opposite. So again I adapted to the jokes by adopting the mantra that "Shortness is Superiority". I am ''also'' partially deaf, so I get the standard annoying people who pretend like they can't hear me. I have several disabilities stacked on top of each other, so for long distance I use a scooter. This means everyone asks how fast it can go "Can it really go 50 miles per hour?" No it can't, that's KILOMETERS per hour, and, no it doesn't even go that fast. "Don't run me over!" "You should put spinners on that thing!" "do you ever break the speed limit?" Uhg. Then there's the morons who try to steal my keys, or the people who ask for a ride... I rehearse the insults I'm going to hurl back, but I have always tried to be polite to everyone and just humor them. Even if I did have a little fun and retort something like "I find your lack of originality disturbing" or "It can go faster than you can run, so I suggest you go down the stairs.", it's not like it would stop the arbitrarily large number of people after them from making any of these jokes. And hey, at least there aren't any Redwall fans left.

This is summer in Texas. Of ''course'' it's bloody hot outside. And yes, I have no particular inclination to suffer at work, so it ''is'' rather nice and cool inside. Thank you, CaptainObvious.

This tropette's best friend's name is Majesta. Toilet paper jokes abound.

With the last name of Burn, I get two very common jokes. The first, and most annoying one, is any sort of references to Charles Montgomery. Not only am I in no way related to a fictional character, but my last name is not the same as his. The second one is a product of having grown up in the 90s. Yes, I am aware that you just "burned" a "Burn". It's not funny. Go away.

(Editor note: this was ported from the main page, and I'm not sure how to reconcile the initial comment with the fact that it's Troper Tales. If you have any ideas, go ahead.)

"Hey, you're left handed!"

This (left-handed) troper doesn't mind that one so much, especially when it's from another left-handed person.

This right-handed Troper likes lefties(as well as short people). It may be a compliment.

Years ago, this troper's library set up a DVD section right next to the VHS section. And ''every single one'' had a "Be Kind, Rewind" sticker on the case...

Likely enough the stickers contained an anti-theft device, and the librarians just didn't care how odd it looked.

This troper knew someone who just went ahead and had a shirt made that, on the front, said "I'm 6'9" ", and on the back said "and yes, I play basketball".

This troper's name isn't even Clarissa, but it's similar enough that people ask her on a fairly regular basis if she explains it all.

This troper is an avid cosplayer, and he occasionally has to get into full costume before making his way to the convention/picnic/whatever. As a result, he's had to walk through downtown Toronto among the normal folk many times... and ''YES, HE KNOWS IT ISN'T HALLOWE'EN.''

Every single time I go to United States, I have varying interations of this conversation: #QUOTE#Some American: So, where are you from? #QUOTE#Me: The Bahamas. #QUOTE#S.A: Really?! I've been to Jamaica. (this may or may not be preceeded or followed by a "Hey Mon!") #QUOTE#Me: [silently reminding self that she is a guest in this country] Really? I haven't. #QUOTE#S.A.: [confused look]

Sometimes, I even have to explain that not only is The Bahamas NOT Jamaica, but it is not a U.S. Territory, we don't live in huts, and hula dancers are in Hawaii.

This Troper's real name is "Ahmet". The moment I heard of "Achmed the Dead Terrorist", I knew I was in for it. I was right.

This troper will inevitably hear some sort of reference to BruceLee, Lee Harvey Oswald, and Robert E. Lee from most everyone he meets. History teachers don't even last a week before giving in to temptation.

This troper's name is Jimmy Theed. You have no many idea how many people snorted when my name was read surname first, but you can imagine how terrible unfunny it was the first time, let alone the following 500. Another common one was saying my name, and tacking "the Ducks" on the end, often used as a means of getting my attention. It eventually died down when people mentally aged beyond the mindset of a toddler, but the few that still use it get a glare and a low growl. I'm sorry to dissapoint, but i am also not a crippled child from Colorado, nor am i the star of a CGI cartoon with an underground lab and a robot dog named Goddard.

This troper's first name is Marcos, and his middle name is Alejandro. Needless to say, he's heard way more than his fair share of Marco Polo and LadyGaga jokes before. It doesn't help that his brother is named Roberto, either.

This troper is named after a character from a certain musical and gets the reference ALL. THE. TIME. Seriously, it's NOT FUNNY ANYMORE.

This troper is named Eden. People still think they're cute when they either call me "Eve" or make any reference to a garden. Those who've known me longer than a week know not to do that anymore, since it's gotten to a point that I flip out any time people get Biblical about my name.

As a John, I mostly avert this with my name. However, as a vegetarian who's fat and tall, I get dozens. No, I don't want a bite of your burger, the weather's fine, and I can tell that I'm fat. My come-back to the tall one is " Are you sure you're not getting a parallax?" My brother, Sam gets "Sam I am" a lot. I also have a friend, and she is quite tall and gets it a lot. They're not creative; get some goddamned new jokes

Hi. My initials are MNM. Yeah, like "M&M", the candy. Laugh it up. I was too young to appreciate the gesture of people "wanting to eat me" in elementary school. Don't think I've told my middle name to anyone in years. Doesn't help that ''some'' fucking scrawny kid wanted to use the phoenetics, as well.

"Hey! You're VERY pale!" "I realized" "Seriously, don't you know about beaches? You see: next time you go there you're going to lay down just under the sun and stay there the whole day" "I can't, I'll get red and blistered" "oh, well...then you might want to start using those tan creams..." "Yeah, sure. Whatever" "Pay me attention! You look like ghost or a vampire! It's creepy" "I'm happy by being creepy, I was born this way" "yeah, buy why can't you get a little darker?" "ok, I'll do it sometime" I never do it.

I met a person whose name was Bellatrix, "Bella" for short. Before, people used to blame her for the death of Sirius Black. After certain series of books and movies came out they're always wondering where's Edward.

This troper is a junior black belt in Tae Kwon Do. She has heard all the jokes there are to make along the lines of "better not make her angry".

This troper put up with countless fruit juice jokes all through high school (his surname is Robinson). Reportedly, a few idiotic people used to make ''jam'' jokes at his dad (that was Rob''ert''son).

This french troper was born in Ivory Coast, and he also happens to be Blind Without Them. The French name for an inhabitant of Ivory Coast is "Ivoirien", who sounds a lot like "see nothing". "That's why you wear glasses!" jokes are never far.

This troper's last name is Rumpel. He has never been called Rumpelstilskin before. He never knew a rump is a butt. He would consequently find being called Rump-Ass hilarious. Some kind soul should introduce him to quality music like the Black Eyed Peas song "My Rumps" because no one has ever done that before. This troper may have been lying when making some of those claims.

On a recent trip to Disneyland, the girl that scanned this troper's pass was a young Black woman...named Tiana. She couldn't help but wonder how often that girl got jokes on the subject...

This troper's surname is Bird. That, and the fact that he is pretty tall (6' 2", not huge but tall enough) and it's no wonder the first question I always get asked upon meeting someone is "Are you related to Larry Bird?" I've also got a few Birdman Attorney at Law}} Harvey Birdman jokes, but those tend to be rare.

Have I got a list for you. Now I will divide it into several catagories.

My oldest brother is name Angus. He has heard jokes about being eaten in a resteraunt, and another brother nicknamed him 'Moo' when he was younger. His favorite ad, incidentally, is "Angus; best quality meat!" which was put on his desk at work.

Another older brother (I have three) is named Alister Blossfeld. Don't call him Ally Cat or Alistare, don't call him Blossomfield.

My name is Patience. I am patient enough to put up with all of your lame jokes. Even worse? My intials are PCBD. Yes, there is another name for Angel Dust in there. Ironically, I was named after a grandmother who chose to use Patience instead of her first name, and she was a doctor.

Lastly; I am another girl from southern New Jersey. Please do not say 'Joisey' as only unintelligent hicks from out of town use that (as we view them). Jersey Shore has no people actually from New Jersey (they are all from Statton Island). New Jersey is not a polluted hellhole; we have a conservation zone of unique Pine Barrens habitat that was a model for many places. 'What exit are you from' is outdated and inaccurate. Please research the Garden State before making fun of it. The only jokes you can make are about our governers. That is all.

My net name is usually shortened into Poly... No, I don't want a cracker. Please stop asking.

My name is Silke, and I'm from Norway, where "Silke" is the word for silk. And I'm starting to get a little tired of jokes like "You're Silke? My name is Cotton!"(alternatively, another fabric, but it's usually cotton.) This joke in particular(I have heard it too many times), and any other joke related to the fabric, are not funny, and they never were.

Non-name example: Whenever someone hears I like Pokémon,(probably because I'm known as "the Pokemon fan", although nowadays "the Nintendo fan" would be more appropiate), or I tell them, especially after I say I only like the games, they start singing the Pokémon theme song. Just shut up.

I work at a company where the name of the company is the same as my first name with "Co" (as in company) on the end. Ie, Name Co. I'm answering phones. Most people's phone greeting is "Welcome to Name Co" or "This is Name Co" then "This is Name, how can I help you?". I don't use that because I'd be inducing this trope on myself. Instead, my phone greeting is "Good morning/afternoon, my name is Name how can I help you?" Every so often I'll get someone who then goes Hello Name from Name Co!" then laughs. At that point I do my usual fake laugh, they realise "this poor guy's probably heard that a million times, and it's lame" and then they make an akward laugh or inadvertantly lampshade it. Then I die a little inside. One saving grace is that the company is obviously named after a thing and not a person, so I am spared the "Are you ''the'' Name?" jokes like the Wendy example above.

This troper's first name is "Carlos." Yes, I've been called "Carlos Mencia" or "Santana." A slight aversion: I don't hear them often nor do they really bother me. (The Santana one I actually like.) This troper also wonders how much crap his friend will get since her name is Space}} Nicole. Maybe none considering when Dead Space 1 came out, no one made the reference.

This French-speaking troper named Sophie always used to hear about a very famous old French children's book called ''The Miseries of Sophie'' in which the stupid kid inadvertently killed animals, broke things, etc, and got whipped as punishment. Worse thing? She ''was'' named after that character. Subverted in later years as she started introducing herself with "like in ''The Miseries of Sophie'', yeah" only to have people actually not know about the book. A new one lately is mentioning it comes from the Greek word meaning ''wisdom'', which would be nice if it weren't coupled with "... one really couldn't tell by looking at you!". Also, this Troper has always been a Ancient Greek geek, so yes, she knows, thank you.

a teacher whose last name sounded exactly like a French equivalent of "pussy". And yes, it has both meanings in French too. While I imagine the jokes she used to get as a child must have been cute, it got more problematic when she started teaching immature high-schoolers. She immediately said in her introduction speech that she had "a delightful last name, yes, thank you" and allowed us to use her first name... though no one did.

This troper's last name is Campbell. Cue the oh-so-clever soup jokes throughout elementary school.

This German troper's first name is Kaspar. I got really tired of the {{Casper}}, DerStruwwelpeter (the Suppen-Kaspar story), Kaspar Hauser and Kasperle (a famous and traditional puppet in Austrian and German puppet theater) jokes throughout elementary school. Add to that the fact that "herumkaspern" in German means "to clown about" and you got one annoyed child.

Katrina Of the Hurricane right here. Even a guy I met 5 years after the fact brought it up. Subverted in the fact I don't really care and I do cause chaos and damage wherever I go.

"Zak Attack". Never funny.

This troper's name is Cesar. Hail to you too. I do like salads.

This troper had a friend who's name is Ben Long. Yes, it's been long since I've seen him too. He's also had a professor who's last name was Rogers. He got his PhD. so people would stop asking if he would be their neighbor.

This troper has been blessed with this.

My name is Ariel. Yes, like the mermaid. People also tend to ask how to pronounce it properly. I tell them that I don't care (the pronunciation differs even within my family, so I don't really notice a difference). They usually then ask how I pronounce it (which is AH-re-el), say it that way once, and never try to get it "right" after that.

I am aware that I am short. (4' 10'') This also gets me a lot of "You're soooooo cute," which I generally don't mind because I sometimes exploit this. However, if you are my peer and coo or talk down to me, you will not live to see tomorrow. Sadly, this has only been worse lately because this troper was cast as a munchkin in TheWizardOfOz at school. With elementary school students who are just as tall as her (I'm in 9th grade).

No, a French horn or mellophone is not "a big instrument for such a little girl." If I needed help carrying it, I would ask, but thanks for asking. No, I WILL NOT TAKE UP THE FLUTE BECAUSE IT IS SMALL! Why someone would pick an instrument because it is small/big like them is beyond me.

This troper is tired of people who make jokes about his big feet, the implications thereof, or ask for his shoe size. It's not so bad when his friends do it, because they're jokes are genuinely funny, but complete strangers will make comments about them. He also got so sick of the constant {{Norbit}} jokes after that movie came out that he had to cut his hair, ''even though it had been like that for over a year before the movie.'' That's why it's a personal rule of this troper to never make an obvious joke about someone if he's sure they've heard it before.

This troper's last name is "Wood," and everywhere I go, I get both the forest-related puns, and the PG-13 penis-related puns.

Although, there was one time where I met a guy named Hunter during a poker game. #QUOTE#'''Someone else''': Dude, stop with the Hunter puns. #QUOTE#'''Me''': My last name is Wood. Let me have this. Just once.

In my middle school class, there was a boy named Jonas. Cue JonasBrothers jokes.

This Troper's last name is Blank. As in there's nothing there. Yes, I've considered not filling in the last name portion on forms. Yes, my signature would be cooler to simply write a dash after my first name. I know you remember my name; you are not drawing a blank. Yes, I get bad grades, but my mind is not blank. When I introduce myself to people, I tell them I've heard all the jokes, and challenge them to prove me wrong. My middle name is also Richard, and someone I knew for a while refused to call me anything but Dick for months after she found out. Also, in high school, 2 of my best friends were a Mr. Campbell, and a Ms. Cheer. Good times.

This troper likes girl with... bigger than average buttocks. If you sing ''BabyGotBack'' to him, he ''will'' kill you. ''Fat Bottomed Girls'' is OK, however. Or any other of those StuffyOldSongsAboutTheButtocks. Just not ''Baby Got Back''. be more original, dammit.

This troper's last name is Merryweather, and she has lost count of the number of weather-related jokes she has heard over her lifetime in relation to it. As much as it is an AwesomeMcCoolname, they can get very annoying.

First off, my name is Luke. Yeah. And I also have a friend, named Mario. ''Yeah''.

At least your name isn't Luigi.

Averted in that people have never been able to find anything witty about my name (Tessa), not for lack of trying. Played straight in that people keep calling me Teresa, which is annoying.

This trope is all over the place for me. I'm an asexual. The first few times of being called inhuman, being asked if I would never get children or get married, if I fucked animals or was actually a closet homosexual as a response to explaining that there is such a thing as asexuality were offending enough. Then I realized no one seems to have even heard of asexuality, meaning that everyone reacts like this. I am also in the habit of avoiding anything addictive, which just makes things worse with the inhumanity jokes. You’d think they’d realize that life choice might be caused by some kind of psychological issue. They don’t. I’m tall as hell, with weight and shoe size that matches this. No, you are not the first to notice. My name is the focus of a song every child in my country knows. I am aware of this. I am also diagnosed with Asperger syndrome, meaning I both loathe repetition and am naturally open about myself.

This troper is named George and got "Curious George," "George of the Jungle" and "George Porgie" all the time. Oh yeah, that's ''really'' clever. Oh, and I'm also asexual, though I don't usually mention it except to people who are already friends or good acquaintances anyway. The rest, I don't care about. Though I have been accused of being gay before.

This troper has a fairly unusual surname that very few people pronounce right first time. When in a group with another person with the same first name, I know when they're referring to me because they pause hesitantly before attempting my surname. Also, said surname lends itself easily to the nickname 'Batty', which I actually adopted at uni to pre-empt the jokes.

Some day I will kill myself brutally for picking a nickname Sir Whinesalot in League of Legends. Damn it sounded like a nice pun at the time. Now, when I dare say anybody anything that's not praising them for their amazing, amazing performance and berating myself for everything they've done wrong, I always, absolutely, literally always get "You really live up to your name" (sic). I usually dismiss that with "Nice joke. I have {{never heard that one before}}!" - not helping much

This troper is named Joe and is just about sick of hearing the following: "Hey, Joe. Whattaya know?" "Hey, Joe. Where ya goin' with that gun in your hand?" "''GIJoe''!" "Where did you come from? Where did you go? Where did you come from, Cotton-Eyed Joe?" And lets not get started with the annual church Christmas Pageant.

In my life, I've known three people who have had the name "Joe King", and resolved never to make the obvious remark. I succumbed, on one occasion, when the individual set himself up by saying "You must be joking" to me.

I have always pitied the young girl I knew many years ago, whose name was "Jenna Taylor".

A friend of mine lives in the town of Sparta, WI. He stops you before you can even start to quote it.

This troper's name is Erik. Yes, I have heard all of the PhantomOfTheOpera jokes.

This troper's name is Erik too but luckily I never heard those jokes. There was this soap though with a Dr. Erik...I hated when they used that.

I happen to share a first and last name with Diana Barry from the Anne Of Green Gables. Yes, I am aware of this. Yes, I am also aware that the character is overweight and uptight. No, my parents did not intend that when they named me. A more original one: No, my round earrings are not "Diana berries".

Nothing like getting woken up at two in the morning just so you can hear quotes from Dumb and Dumber. My family name is Seebass, I'll let you figure the rest.

Inverted by a friend of this troper named Douglas. When meeting him for the first time, someone asked him if he would ever return to the Philippines (to which he has never been). He didn't get the War Two}} Douglas MacArthur joke, but I did.

About how many people got sick of the swine-flu jokes when there was an epidemic. You know, whenever you were getting over a cold, coughed or sneezed, and someone would yell "He/She's got Swine Flu!"

This troper knows a girl named Meeghan, who just happens to be vegan. She told me that whenever someone makes the obvious joke, she "just lets them think they're the first one to come up with it."

This troper has staffed at several small anime conventions, and one of his jobs was checking people's passes to make sure they're valid. The first time someone did the {{Star Wars}} Mind Trick}} "You don't need to see my pass" thing, it was funny. The fiftieth...not so much.

I used to know someone at school called Robin Marks. He used to get accused of cheating in tests all the time.

For a personal example, my last name is McManus. And yes, everyone at my school, I ''am'' aware that the last four letters of it are "anus". Thank you for pointing it out to me. About a million times.

Also, I am aware that my first name (Sam) rhymes with things such as ham, spam, jam, etc. '''''Now please stop doing it'''''. Thank you. And yes, I have also heard "Play it again, Sam" many times.

I also had a teacher called Miss Jackson. Around the time the {{Outkast}} song was popular. She actually quoted the song at the start of her first lesson (and I mean her first; she was a new teacher at the school) just to let the class get it out of their system.

This troper's name is Mary. I have had:

"So, where's the little lamb?"

"How does the garden grow?"

"Scary mary" (Thanks a ''lot'', phones4u.)

and best of all...let's just say I'm never dating anyone called Joseph EVER AGAIN.

I have a friend named Paul, whom everyone calls "Paulie." At one point, I felt like a smartass, squawked, and said "Paulie want a cracker?" He turned to me, SlasherSmile at full force, and said cheerfully "Congratulations! You're the 3,657th person to say that to me! Your prize is the strange feeling that someone is watching you!" Then he disappeared for the rest of the night, and, indeed, I had the feeling that someone was watching me. Paul is a ParanoiaFuel Station Attendant.

This troper's full name, of which the first name is John, apparently can be sung to the tune of John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. There are five unconnected cases of this happening.

This troper's last name has the Dutch word for Mussel in it(which is Mossel). There is also a song called translated: Do you know the Musselman? No I don't know him and yes it wasn't funny the first time I heard it either.

This troper's teacher is named Bill Collins. No, he does NOT feel it coming in the air tonight.

I averted this once when I ran into a guy named Luke, I ended making a TalesOfTheAbyss reference, of course, he had no idea what I was talking about.

This troper has a rather obscure last name, too obscure to safely be able to reveal in full, but she will say that the first part of it sounds exactly like "Bieber." It is not spelled like Bieber, but it sounds like it. I cannot count the number of times that I have been asked if I am related to Justin Bieber. My attempts to explain that it is spelled differently (and, regardless, is still a different last name altogether, despite how the first two syllables sound) don't help this at all.

This same troper's best friend's mom's name is Marcia. She despises her name because every time she meets somebody new, they all say the same thing: "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!" Even my mom, who is her best friend, said it once, and that didn't go over well.

And, lastly, this troper's choir class recently performed Elton John's "Your Song" for our spring concert. Whenever the director would say, "Now let's do ''Your Song''," one of the kids (it was always the same few kids, too) would reply, "What's our song?" She finally got fed up and told us that it "wasn't funny the first twenty times, either." It did nothing to shut us up.

This Troper's name is Angelina, not to be confused with a Jolie}} certain actress, or a Ballerina}} mouse who is a ballerina.

This troper's last name rhymes with "Roboto." Basically everyone he's met has eventually used the "Domo arigato" line.

If, like me, your name is Vicky, you'll probably have heard people sing 'Icky Vicky' from The Fairly Odd Parents at you a lot.

I used to know someone named Alejandro, who I never really got along with - Even though this was years after I'd last seen him, when a certain LadyGaga single came out, I got a minor bit of schadenfreude from knowing he was probably somewhere being annoyed by people singing it to him.

As a kid, adults would frequently sing "Michael row your boat ashore" when they heard my name - now I occasionally still get a "Mikey likes it" (especially because my sister and many of her friends ''do'' call me Mikey anyway).

This troper (who can safely reveal his name without fear of people finding him) is called William Brown. Surprisingly, next to no one mentions the Just William series when he says his name. Until he learnt there was a folk song called "William Brown", which was sang at the folk club he frequents. Fortunately, no one else knows it, so my sanity is saved.