This troper and his best friend managed to hold a forty minute-long conversation made of nothing double entendre on the back seat of our bus home. It basically involved me remarking on him "going to fast"; telling him that if he keeps doing that "he's gonna explode!"; and demanding he "must teach me that technique!". The source of the conversation? His attempts at the ipod game Vortex. Much laughter could be heard down the aisle.

This Tropette has been yelled at by her parents by being too "perverted" for her ability to discuss these at length, and whenever her male friends say "fuck you" to her, she says "your house or mine?"

Take a French song. Replace all instances of "aimer" (to love) with "baiser" (to fuck). Have fun.

In French, playing pool involves all kinds of vocabulary that sounds right out of a porno movie. I mean, pushing balls into holes with the French slang for penis? Sheesh.

This troper and his GF once had a very interesting conversation. ->Me:"What's your favorite pokemon?" ->Her:"I guess it would have to be Onix. I like rock types but he's also a snake so he really appeals to me. Plus he can use harden which makes it almost impossible to defeat him." ->ME:"Really?(said with a suppressed laugh) Considering what you said I'm gonna choose cloyster." ->Her: "What do you mean?" She eventually figured it out a few hours later while we were snuggling.

This other troper would like to point out that there is a trainer couple you can battle that have those same choices in Pokémon.

I'm a writer/artist for a little indie web-distributed not-quite-adult-not-quite-for-kids comic, and I am not above injecting a little double entendre into a script. Case in point: my latest story where a cute female superhero battles a cold-based jewel thief known as The Yellow Snowman. At one point he tell her, "They say diamonds are a girl's best friend." To which she retorts, "Personally, I'd rather have my boyfriend give me a nice pearl necklace!" To say nothing of homoerotic subtext in an earlier story set in a beauty shop, with Mr. Rotch, first name Mike, and his assistants Gaylord, Quincy and Fagala...and a boy who eats an entire bowl of face cream with a white color, a goopy texture, and a salty flavor.

When staying at a friend's house for the night (heh, heh), this is all this Troper and his friend could DO(heh heh). We laughed at EVERYTHING WE HEARD. Just try to go through (heh heh) the Winnie the Pooh special "Too Smart For Strangers" without cracking up. Since this Troper is normally a quiet, nerdy, and, um, "clean" kinda guy, said friend almost said "You're more fun at night." Cue laughter explosion.

My best friend complained once about me putting mu feet on her chair. I complained that the boy behind her did it too. She then said: "I don't mind it from the back, but I can't take it from the side." It took her three minutes of me trying to explain, but cracking every time, before she realized what she said.

In middle school, this troper's friend (and her...private habits) were the subject of a rumor going around the school, and it embarrassed her to no end. One day, someone came (hehe) up to her and asked very frankly if she masturbated. Troper's friend denied the rumors, barely avoiding a {{Rant Inducing Slight}}. This troper asked if she was alright, to which she responded, "I CAN HANDLE MYSELF!". {{Hilarity Ensued}}

Y'know, with all the news going around about President Obama's "Massive Stimulus Package", my dirty mind has been working overtime. Democrats wanting a larger Stimulus Package, Republicans saying the President's Stimulus Package is too large. Everybody wants a piece of the President's Stimulus Package, especially the elderly and the poor. The President's Stimulus Package will create millions of new jobs. "This is a huge package," says Senator Charles Schumer. OK I'll stop now.

It gets worse. Since the phrase "Stimulus Package" has entered the common lexicon, a local (Washington DC area) minor league baseball team has picked it up and (combining it with the name of their mascot (a blue Muppet-like think dressed as Uncle Sam) has come out with a discount ticket plan called "Uncle Slam's Stimulus Package"! I giggle every time I hear the ads.

In your head, replace any mention of the word sword, wand, pole, or staff in any media with the word [[spoiler:penis]]. It's fun, try it! (spoiler-tagged for those easily offended)

Changing the last letter of "wand" in quotes from ''HarryPotter'' has interesting results.

"Cauldron" jokes work pretty well, too, even better than "Chamber of secrets" jokes. F'rexample: Jokes about Hermione "stirring her cauldron," or even jokes about some poor schmuck renting a Harry Potter spinoff called ''Two Witches, One Cauldron'' thinking it was a family-friendly adventure film, and getting quite a surprise...

Many lines in Star wars become incredibly funny if you replace a word with pants.

"I am altering the pants. Pray I do not alter [them] any further." Both creepy and hilarious. Is it possible that this change to the line CrossesTheLineTwice ?

This troper has once seen a page along the same lines with mundane quotes from ''TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'' "pants"ed.

StaffChick. If I didn't do it, someone else would.

Which one? Might be enjoyable.

ScrewedByTheNetwork. Enough said. XD

After rereading this page, I realised it's gotten longer.

You all were being very sloppy before I joined in. That being said, I realized some of your foreign ways of doing things aren't necessarily wrong, just different.

At least it's not a dirty, sticky mess.

That was quite the release. I'm ready for another go at it.

We lengthened it with the power of our long, thorough entries!

A favourite game of this troper's friends is inserting either "in my pants" or "in your pants" at the end of any sentence or song title. It produces minutes of fun (and searching through song lists) before we get bored and move onto some other game. Favourites include "Foreplay/Longtime", "Everytime We Touch", and "Lips of an Angel".

This troper and her friends once played this for half an hour straight before running out of songs/ getting bored

This troper and her friends use "between my legs" or "between your legs".

Similarly try inserting ''...in bed'' at the end of fortune cookie fortunes.

Best fortune this troper ever got. "A pleasant suprise in in store for you tonight." Of course we threw in the obligatory "in bed." HilarityEnsues.

This troper now does this with every fortune cookie he recieves on Facebook. And another time me and my friends were reading our Fortune Cookies that we got from Panda Express some of the highlights were "You will be the King of the World(in bed)." and "You will soon be reunited with a beloved friend(in bed)."

"Excitement and intrigue follow you closely wherever you go." ...in bed.

"A surprise will await you at the end of the day"... in bed.

{{xkcd}} plays with a variation on that theme here.

Another xkcd comic features replacing the word "eye" in various songs with "thigh". Thigh of the Tiger, Close your Thighs, My Brown-Thighed Girl etc.

Bright thighs... burning like fi~ire...

Nobody knows what it's like to be the bad man, to be the sad man...behind blue thighs?

Dr. Manhattan! You should have just told us you were feeling down!

You all had me with "insert". Really.

Heh-heh. Insert.

I '''love''' being in the middle.

You're all nuts if you think I should just slide in a very hard, long stretch of innuendo, trying to force in a messy statement that is just hollow and slippery to grasp.

"Just in case my mom's going to be anal I'll see if I can shove my paintbrush in that crack." Yes, I actually said that while painting the fence.

Too tight for me! I'll cover your rear.

Did your teacher ever say to you, "It's the middle of June, David, take off that jacket! You're making me hot just looking at you!"?

No, but this troper had an elderly old man for a teacher who would just say "Jacket off! Heh heh heh."

I had a boss ask me if I was hot.

At first I had a hard time editing tropes, but it's not so bad, you just need to get a firm grasp on the material. Find an entry point, and work your way in from there. Or even approach it from a different angle, sometimes that makes it easier.

This troper remember reading a sports section (The Local High School mascot is the Jackrabbits, the Girls teams are Lady Jacks). "Lady Jacks off to a great finish"

This troper's college (Lumberjacks) had a similar "problem."

My high school had the beavers. Best. Team. Ever.

This troper read an excellent fanfic where one character exclaimed, after nearly being strangled to death by a plug ugly tentacle creature: "That was, without a doubt, the ''least'' attractive creature I ever hope to have sucking on my neck!" I wonder what the ''most'' attractive thing would be...?

ahem

I can keep this up all day.

This column's too long...

In-''your''-enndo.

SoBadItsHorrible... hopely for most, ''not'' what she said.

IT'S WONDERFUL TO BE THE TROPER IN THE IN THE MIDDLE!

I don't mind. Being on top is nice, but sometimes you have to be on the bottom.

Oh, it's all right- I changed my mind anyway. After being forced to be on the bottom for so long I started getting used to it, and now I think I've kind of started liking it... just don't let anyone else know, or I'm screwed!

That sounds pretty hard, I don't know if I can do it...

But I need you to! I need it so bad. Do it. DO IT NOW. Please... please...

After reading the term "Uke", does anyone else have any problems not giggling at "ukelele"?

No, but add a Yaoi Fangirl into a martial arts class that begins with the instructor explaining what it means to be a 'good uke' (the one receiving current throw or what have you) in a technique practice.

About that...this troper's local newspaper once ran an article about ukeleles. It was on the front page of a section. The title, in VERY large letters: "Uke Madness!" This troper was rendered unable to move for several minutes.

Similarly, while in Hawaii, this troper's mother was constantly talking about "ukes". One time, she wondered aloud if "professional ukes" were larger than normal ones. This troper had a difficult time keeping a straight face.

This Troper read an article on Youtube about ukeleles, and they called them "Uke Players". This happened.

From a classmate after confronting his stage fright: "I think I handled myself pretty well."

It's always good to get up and face any hardship head on.

This troper was once involved in his high school's theatre group, and was in charge of operating the spotlight. Unfortunately, he accidentally aimed the light too low, and as a result the actor's head was left unlit... and the student who was up there supervising exclaimed "No, you're cutting off his head! GIVE CONRAD MORE HEAD!" (the entendre was unintentional)

During a trip to an amusement park (which could be considered a [=~Double Entendre~=] in itself), This Troper said, (with dried sunscreen on his hands): #QUOTE#Troper: "I'm not a fan of having sticky stuff on my hands." (realizes his mistake) #QUOTE#Troper: "And if you say anything to that, I will punch you in the stomach!"

I REALLY want to go to a kids fourm just to post a bunch of posts like these, but I can't find any.

What about this one?

A couple of double-Ents in music:

Flute (or Clarinet or recorder) in A Minor

B flat is my favourite.

G strings.

Ever broke your G String while fingering a minor?

That's what she said.

This troper's Psychology 101 professor, during a lecture on sexuality, mentioned the practice, in some African cultures, of performing clitorectomies in order to control female sexuality. "It's a very primitve procedure in rural communities," she said. "It's done in the bush--" Immediately everyone burst out laughing and the professor's face went beet-red. A RealLife example of (unintentional) DeadBabyComedy if ever there was one.

Sophmore science classroom, quick, fun, pre-MEA lab involving playing with chemicals. Chemicals found in glow sticks, which required carefully dissecting them to reduce them to their component parts. At first the entendres were fairly innocuous (mostly in the vein of 'I want one of the long, sort of stiff ones... no, the little short one!') until after almost a half-hour of near silence someone stood up and exclaimed in horror, 'Aw, crap! The rubber broke, and now it's all over! I need another glove...' Um. (That was me. Honest to God, I wasn't thinking. And yes, my hands still glow.)

ThisTroper knows quite a few languages. It's nice to be a cunning linguist.

I would like to thank you for that joke, I use it myself often.

"I tried taking it out and it popped in my face!" He was talking about a k'nex bridge among a four-person group including myself. I was the only one who laughed. Later I said "missed connections are hard to see by eye, so I just kind of feel it up." Borderline in text, but very much double entendre when you consider my hands were all over the bridge.

Stage crew. Set building. You don't know how many double entendres can be made until you're stuck in a room full of horny high schoolers with drills and long shafts of wood... Once this troper was sitting inside a wooden box with no top. Two techies with drills were getting ready to put the top on, and one had to lean across the opening. She saw this troper and said "Get out from under me, I don't want to screw you."

You were sitting in a wooden box with no top? You must have been one of the hornier high schoolers.

I was just rubbing my grandmas wet pussy.. ...okay, so he was probably wording it that way on purpose. But the page has ''many''.

This conversation over a mountain pass race... "He's stuck to your butt like-" "Don't say it!" "Don't say what?" "Anything you say past this point is going to have a perverted meaning." "No it's not, I was going to say "Like white on rice."" "Exactly..."

One of my dorm-mates is a girl, cute girl even, with a boyfriend, I believe. I was eating dinner, and had palmed and pocketed a fork to take back to my hall with me. She and some of her friends had come over to join me, with her eating something Chinese, and failing with the chopsticks. After some discussion that she could do better if she had a fork to use, I told her that I "had a solution in my pants", got up, pulled the fork out, and handed it to her. It took a moment for everybody to hear it, but it brought the house down.

Then, of course, as we were leaving the cafeteria, one of our group was stopped by some dude who asked if they were getting together some time later, presumably to study. She answered in the enthusiastic affirmative, which led us to believe it wasn't just study, wink wink, nudge nudge. It didn't help matters that she explained that there would be a couple other people at this gathering. So, yeah. Me and mine have terribly dirty minds.

I was carrying a chocolate muffin (the baked goods kind) when a girl said "It's so ''big''!" Earlier, another girl had requested we return to the coffee room, because she desired a stirring utensil, but phrased the request as "I wanna spoon"...

This Troper once had a female classmate offer him the cherry from the shake she had for lunch. I ''couldn't'' let that one go.

...Everyone on this page has all these stories about doing it with their friends. I don't have any friends, and after a while, doing it by yourself just starts seeming kinda pathetic. Every night, it's just me and my computer, and eventually my wrists start hurting and I realize how sad and lonely I am.

It's okay, I'm sure all of us want to cheer you up now.

What, all at once? Won't that be awful crowded? I really don't think I can take more than two or three of you at once...

This troper's ex-girlfriend once joking said "F--- you." to him good-naturely mocking her driving skills. To which said troper replied "Oh, would you?"

This troper after being told I have a "rapier wit": #QUOTE#'''Me''': Rapier? Hardly knew her.

Once, in a class discussion on ''AuroraLeigh'' by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, This Troper's class had broken off into small groups. While describing the one woman who described her feelings for a male character in food terminology in a seductive manner, this Troper declared, "She wanted to verb his noun!" much in the tone of "That's what she said." It fits the trope because the book basically sets up a battle of the sexes both in marital/sexual relations and in the ability to create true art.

This Troper's math teacher once written this gem of a problem on the dry erase board: #QUOTE#'''Problem''': "If you flip a coin, what is the probability of getting head?" #QUOTE#'''Everyone''': *giggles* #QUOTE#'''Teacher''': *just realizing the typo* Slim to none.

Is it sad that that's actually a pick-up line?

More like inevitable, I'd say. It's also happened naturally more than once apparently.

Keep in mind that your chance of getting head is the same as your chance of getting tail.

This troper recently realized that, after a conversation about "someone liking or disliking wood", the word "woodworking" becomes very, very dirty...

Of the unintentional variety: this troper was once writing a story involving descendants of the heroes of ''JourneyToTheWest'' and other Asian classics, but had to redo a scene in which one character disciplined the granddaughter of Son Goku once he realized that said hero was ''the monkey.''

Triple entendre: in a tabletop RPG game once, a character in the party had had a bit of an... encounter with a naiad (essentially a water nymph), and when the rest of the party needed to cross her river, she was very helpful. When one of the characters mused about why she was so helpful, another character responded: "I guess he must be good in the water."

More of a VisualInnuendo, but this Troper was once cleaning a thermometer in a ''very'' suggestive way (involved said Troper vigorously rubbing a long, hard, thin shaft with a paper towel).

It works better with alcohol.

When I was getting a Christmas tree, I thought, "Maybe we should get that one, its top isn't bare" I wisely decided to not finish my sentence.

A wiki example: wall banger.

Another: EverythingIsBigInTexas.

A friend was having a conversation about bulletin boards or some kind of crafty project like that. One of the people he was talking to said "I only have ten inches to play with." Said friend was so excited to deliver a "THAT! IS! WHAT SHE SAID!!!"

This troper once got into a friend's car whose backseat stored a small pile of books, papers and other detritus. The friend said to just move the stuff aside "so you don't have to sit on my junk." Sadly, said friend is unaware of the euphemism.

I like to play with myself, because I always win. (Said by this troper's friend, regarding playing Monopoly solo. He quickly amended it with "GAH! I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!", but only after the troper snorted grape soda out his nose.)

Once in a restaurant famous for its biscuits and gravy (sausage gravy to be exact), this troper was asked by another diner if he wanted a box for his sausage and two biscuits. He replied, "Oh, is that like 'meat and two veg'?" Half a second of shocked silence followed by half a minute of brely controlled laughter. He only just realized that there were at least two double entendre in that sentence.

This troper and her friends have apparently clean minds...until about three seconds after someone says just about anything. Some examples:

This exchange after a commercial that said something was 'boneless': "You have no bones" "your face has no bones" "your mom has no bones" "I'll bone you!" *awkward silence* "I can't believe you just-" "never happened."

After someone said something about the pussycat dolls: "I have a black pussy!" stupid black cats....

"Don't touch me there daddy." I randomly tack on names for my friends at the end of sentences. She poked my eye...

"Why is he down there?" "I don't know." "he should be on top!" We were on some stairs.

A friend of this troper's brother apparently had this conversation happen in a class recently while discussing the upcoming exam: #QUOTE#'''Student 1:''' Is it long? #QUOTE#'''Teacher:''' Well, I don't really know... #QUOTE#'''Student 2:''' Is it hard? #QUOTE#'''Teacher:''' I don't really know that either... #QUOTE#'''Student 3:''' Is it fun? #QUOTE#'''Teacher:''' So, is it long, hard and fun...? #QUOTE#'''Student 4:''' That's what she said!

This troper can't look at the state of Florida on a map without bursting into laughter anymore. I mean, just LOOK at it!

Extra fun if you watch AxisPowersHetalia

Some friends of this troper were having an argument about cars in class one day. One friend expressed preference for a certain type of car, which caused the other friend to say "But it's long and hard to handle!" Cue hysterical laughter from both friends and this troper who was unashamedly eavesdropping.

I am astounded by the sheer number of tropers who came before me on this page. I'm not even sure I still want to try and squeeze in anymore. My contribution is so small, you see, that it will probably won't even be noticed. And if I try and make it longer, I'll just end up with very sore hands.

Your contribution might be small, but {{ThisTroper}}'s is HUGE.

The following conversation once occurred between this troper and her friend: #QUOTE#Friend: When are you going to finish?! #QUOTE#Troper: Soon; I want to end it at a climax... #QUOTE#Friend: ...(kinda forgot what she said) #QUOTE#Troper: Not ''that'' kind of climax, you idiot!

What makes it even weirder is that we were talking about ''fanfictions''!

Similarly: #QUOTE#Friend: Do not talk right now. I'm reading this AWESOME FANFICTION and I'm right in the middle of the CLIMAX!

She used that exact capitalization, too.

{{rutheni}} has a running gag along the lines of "I am a sick, sick, man..." "Also, I have a nasty cold/the flu/a twenty-four hour bug."

From ''GuiltyGear XX'': #QUOTE# '''Bridget:''' "Hey, what's wrong with you? You suddenly went limp right in the middle of the fight..."

It's Short, So It Sucks.

This is why I used to calibrate my joystick in private.

I once tried to play with my Wii, but it slipped out because I didn't use the strap.

High school bike tour. Large group, sleeping in tents. This troper slept in a tent with a male and a female friend of his. Threesome-jokes already circulated (of course, it was a high school tour if you missed the first sentence), when one evening the girl asked loudly for lubricant. Laughs, laughs and even more laughs. She was asking for some WD-40 for her bike's transmission system...

This troper is writing a story with, as its title, ''The Moon of (the male romantic interest who is part-werewolf)''.

This troper was at a LAN party where he and a buddy began comparing the length of our power cords. We determined that his power cord was longer, but mine was thicker. We also decided to plug them into the same hole in the wall- mine was on top, his was on the bottom. Subverted when he pretended to finally get the joke and claimed everyone in the room watching this had a dirty mind.

This troper's great at fishing. I'm a master baiter.

This Troper tend to use use them around her male friends, knowing very well that they would think of it in 'that way'. #QUOTE#Me: *stare* Can I have one? #QUOTE#Friend: No. #QUOTE#Me: Please? #QUOTE#Friend: No! You already have some! #QUOTE#Me: But your chips are longer than mine!

This troper's friend threatened to beat his other friend at ''{{Tetris}}'' by using an arcade stick: #QUOTE# "I will take [him] with my stick"

This Troper encounters these a lot in school. My friend was blowing on my head to annoy me. #QUOTE#Me: Casandra, stop blowing me!

There was another one, too, but I can't remember it right now.

Randy Johnson, AKA The Big Unit. Great pitcher, funny name if you think about it.

There's something just... ''wrong'' about soft carrots! I prefer my carrots raw, as they're hard!

"Rolling the dice" for this Troper's D&D group (long story short: it involved someone "cooking" the dice under the table, one-handed and in a very familiar manner).

This troper once had a discussion about female soccer that could apply to both the players' abilites and their appearances.

My male friends and I were having a competition to see who could come up with the best, absolutely true (in the innocent way), double entendre about our relationship with a lesbian friend. I believe I still hold the title with 'Her hot pussy on my penis kept me up all night' (Her evil feline decided that my groin would be a nice place to sleep. Said cat was so frightening it scared off a Norwegian Ridgeback, I wasn't moving it, or getting any sleep while it was there)

One time at a grocery store when I was shopping with a friend I was buying a bag of hamburger buns which my friend offered to hold then kept holding them a little too tightly. Worried that they were going to get squashed I shouted at him "Quit squeezing my buns!" Unfortunately a woman was walking by at the time and burst out laughing. Apparently it was sounding as if I was telling my friend Steve to "Stop squeezing my ass" which I did not mean at all.

Fixed.

After the release of the first PiratesOfTheCaribbean film, a class mate returned from a screening with a story about audience participation: At the end of the film, Anamaria, a black, female pirate, has aided her former cohort Jack Sparrow in regaining his ship, even warming him with a coat as a gesture she's put old wounds behind her. She then states... #QUOTE# '''Anamaria''': The Black Pearl be yours, captain.

At which point someone in the audience yelled out, "That means ''two'' things!"

Aww man, I was hoping they'd have said "And the ship too!"

This troper spent almost three hours of his life watching a prawn movie.

At a sleepover for this troper's birthday, one of her friends kept taking random phrases from the conversation and saying "I'd like to _____ ''your'' ____," to induce this trope. When we got pizza and were discerning which was which flavour, he said "I'd like to meat ''your'' lovers." Realising it sounded worse with the words switched around, this troper replied "I'd like to ''love'' your ''meat''," and grossed everyone out. She's proud of that moment.

Grossed? What are you, Puritans?

"It's better to have it happen quickly and have it bleed a little then have them sitting there for like, a whole minute trying to push through. It crushes the delicate tissue in that area, and it's prone to get infected." Um, we were talking about puncturing ''different'' tissue as a rite of passage-- ear piercing, needles vs. guns. But um.

ThisTroper was on a trip with a teacher and an number of classes for a Quiz Bowl competition, and we went looking up and down a Beaver Road to find a fast food joint for lunch. Eventually we had to stop and get directions. Between quite a bit of snickering all around, the following exchange occurred: #QUOTE#'''Student 1:''' Coach, were we supposed to stay on Beaver Road or go down the other road? #QUOTE#'''Student 2:''' I hear it's a ''dirt'' road... #QUOTE#'''Teacher:''' Oh, I saw ''that'' one coming. #QUOTE#'''Student 3:''' Yeah, that's what she said!

Today I learned an innocent, wholesome expression about how the friends that are always welcome in your life are better than the ones you treat with a certain formality. The expression? "Back door friends are best". Can't... stop... laughing...

This troper's ex-schoolmates are obsessed with pointing these out, especially where noe were actually intended.

Between last year's men's choir and this year in concert choir I have heard and made more "top" jokes and "Bottom" jokes than most people would think is possible. It all depends on who's on top.

This troper was stunned that nobody else picked up on this one. I was at school and everyone was waiting for the bus inside except the seniors, since it was raining. One of my friends had a microphone, which she was using to tell everyone what bus had arrived. Anyway, inside, a bunch of people were sitting on the chairs. What happened next went something like this: #QUOTE# Vice-Principal: Are they on the chairs? Tell them to get off. #QUOTE# Friend *through microphone*: Everyone, get off. (Vice-Principal) says get off. So, get off.

I was snickering so much.

Never take a snake as a familiar in D&D unless you ''like'' {{DoubleEntendre}}s. This Troper found that one out the hard way. Yes, that is a snake in my robes, no, I am not happy to see you.

This troper was reading his Journalism class's textbook (there's one right there) and looked up "Chinese names" in how to properly refer to people. One of the example names? Jack Wang.

This troper has had incidents like this; usually when describing something from a game to friends. Some of the notable things include "I wish my sword was a big as Cloud's", "Yoshi's Cucumber is amazing", "I stole Peach's booty!", and "Brock's Onix is hard".

What is this, YouTube comments? Try [=HARDer=], man!

This troper's friend is just full of these. About the mailman: "He does back-door deliveries and handles with care!" About the Wii: "Turn it on and enter a world of wonderful fantasy!" Etcetera.

This troper had the pleasure of seeing a friend freak out a waitress by complaining about his limp noodle. We were having chinese.

While watching my boyfriend playing {{Zelda}} Twilight Princess: #QUOTE#Me: So he's able to get wet? (watching Link emerge from water) #QUOTE#BF: Yup After a while Link was rolling to get around faster or something #QUOTE#Me: Is he able to get dirty too? My boyfriend promptly gave me a WTF look, and upon realizing that I was completely innocent in what I had just said he burst out laughing.

It's impossible for this troper and her friend to keep a straight face during guitar lessons, when our male, 50-years-old teacher talks about "G-strings".

I once surprised my friend (who's a guy) who was coming home from a job interview with the phrase, "Ya want a kiss?" It was the Hershey's candy. It doesn't seem that risque, but ItMakesSenseInContext: (a) the guy friend in question is very bashful, (b) there has been word that I have a crush on the guy (and it doesn't help my case against the accusations that I'm extremely nice to the guy), and (c) my tone of voice was set to "I want you so bad" instead of "Hi. Have a good day?". This also counts as AccidentalInnuendo.

Whenever this troper says "screw you" to her friend, he replies " when and where baby?"

Once, while playing the Penis Game (each player successively says penis louder than the person before them) with his roommate, this troper got to the point where he was bellowing the word "PEENIIIIIIIIIIS". His roommate then said "Dude, you didn't go louder, you just went longer and deeper." Cue the laughter (and blushing from the girls).

A (male) forum friend once said in a chat (talking about Poké balls) "I need more balls. I only have two, and both are special." After comments on how that sounded wrong, he replied that it was the point.

Never mind the fact that the development team has put into the game "Love Balls", "Ultra Balls", "Great Balls", "Heavy Balls", "Luxury Balls", even the almighty "Master Balls".

In Norwegian, the number six is "seks" ...pronounced like "sex". So when a friend once said she "bought six" of something, we all started laughing the next second.

Numerous towns in Pennsylvania features traffic signs on some of the side streets that warn drivers "Speed '''Hump''' Ahead". (boldface mine)

It isn't only Pennsylvania; this troper lives in Massachusetts and has also seen Speed Hump signs. (Most signs here do say Speed ''Bump'', though.)

This troper is in a {{Pokemon}} roleplay in which she roleplays as Cress. Cress happened to fall asleep on the job, and he had a dream in which his brother, Chili, had hair made out of ice cream. And his other brother, Cilan, happened to be around as Cress was saying, "Oh Chili~ You are so delicious~" in his sleep.

"I picked up the bible from the floor and put it in my bed. So tonight i sleep with Jesus!"

This troper was doing a roleplay with some friends, and one character needed to be taken to a hospital. Unfortunately no one felt like RPing some one-off medical characters so I got stuck with them. The injured character ended up being treated by Doctor Bo'Nar, two twin male nurses named Tess and Tikal, and a female anthro cat named Doctor Tabby. Did I mention the character receiving treatment happens to be a god of gay sex?

The full name is Dr. Tabby Pussy.

And said gay sex god has wings with feathers that turn into TENTACLES

Which Dr. Pussy played with XF

This troper used to have an awful habit, picked up from another friend, of giggling whenever the verb "come" was used in any context with potential double entendre, or indeed, sometimes without any context at all. For example, exploding with sudden laughter in a completely silent classroom when our Spanish teacher chose the verb "to come" to conjugate on the whiteboard. There was an awful, awful pause where everyone stared at me. The look my teacher gave me was absolutely priceless. I'm still friends with a few people who were there and they bring it up occasionally, much to my embarrassment.

I was also once with the friend I'd picked up that habit from, trying to cross an extremely crowded hallway at school. As we struggled against a wave of younger students from all sides, I shouted to my friend, completely unaware of any double entendre, "THEY'RE COMING AT US FROM ALL DIRECTIONS!" My friend laughed for about three minutes straight.

I was playing a game with my friend (heh heh) where the first person to laugh loses. I said "In America" and she said "In yo momma's pants." I cracked up. That was the only time she ever won a game.

This Troper once got a Fortune that said and I quote "YES,DO IT IN CONFINDENCE!".This Troper and her friends had a good laugh after reading it.

A friend: "It's not the size that counts, it's how you use it!" Used in a completely clean context, ubt it was clear she was being DoubleEntendre. Which, of course, made me slip in a "That's what she said!"