At the next lunchtime contest at This Troper's school, she plans on having the DJ play the {{Barenaked Ladies}} song "It's Only me (The Wizard of Magicland)". Sounds normal, right? Well, yes and no. No}} No, because Date With Rosie Palms}} the song is about masturbation. But, yes, because the refrences to masturbation aren't '''that''' obvious.

This troper and, specifically, his friends, seem to live off this. At school especially, it has become our one and only past-time to see how far we can stretch the limits. Some instances include:

Friend 1 has always been a ridiculously bad singer. However, he felt the need to enter the school's talent contest, for some ludicrous reason or other. Keeping in mind that said friend is one whom I commonly accompany in singing our favourite Disney tunes, said friend decided on performing a rendition of Mulan's 'Be a Man.' He won second place for sheer CMOF value. I'd also like to point out that said friend sung the same song at the Sydney Opera House during a school tour (we live on the other side of the country BTW).

Friend 2 has a thing with our free dress days. We only get one every semester, so he determines to make it last. In year 10 he got us to wrap him up in alfoil before school. First session we had a maths lest, and needless to say it was one of the more annoying ones any of us had had to attend. This year (year 12) he decided to one-up it, and attend with a shirt made from nothing but black body paint - with the cuffs and collar cut from a shirt he'd bought from an op shop - a red tie, and buttons stuck in place by the paint. There was quite a bit of Ho Yay between us that day as I had to constantly reapply paint to him bewteen classes.

Friend 3 and I had to do a presentation in English Lit (english focusing on old-school stuff) on The Great Gatsby, chosen from a number of topics. As our teacher was a full-blown Fema-Nazi, we chose the most anti-Feminism topic we could, and proceeded to inform the class on how insignificant a role women play as characters in the story. The presentation included a 'Pyramid of Whippape' that included much of the main cast. I dared not make eye contact with the teacher that lesson for fear of spontaneously combusting. Somehow, we got a solid 6.5-7.0/10.

I failed in my attempt at Refuge In Audacity when I failed an essay on the premise of Star Wars. The teacher simply refused to read it, and handed it back with a note claiming 'I don't understand.' I thought it was hilarious. She did not. On a brighter note, it is the longest essay I have ever written.

Pedobear is this to me. Same with troll fics.

One of my classmates managed to drop ten F bombs in a single sentence. This happened in front of a teacher who usually put students off for swearing. He found it amusing.

This Troper was taking a test in Freshman Biology when my teacher walked up to me and asked that I put away my Spanish notes that I left out because I might be cheating. I picked up my papers and put them on display to her while saying, "You caught me. I learned enough Spanish in the first three months of school to copy all of my Bio notes into Spanish so I could cheat." That's exactly what I did. My teacher, who frequently speaks Spanish to her students doesn't even bother to look at my papers before saying, "Sarcasm will you get you everywhere in life." And the point where I pushed it into crazy levels was when I said, "Sure got you far." She just left after that and I was the only one to pass. Might also count as a SarcasticConfession.

This Troper is writing a vampire story. At the end they have kids. How is it explained nobody finds out they're a family of vampires? Well, when you were a kid, you always pretended to be a wizard or whatever, right? Basically, children won't be believed when they say they're a vampire, and adults are smart enough to keep it a secret.

Okay, who let Stephenie Meyer on this page?

Good sir, that was an insult to me. I challenge you to pistols at sundown. Damn humans...

Isn't that a CassandraTruth?

The kids are doing CassandraTruth. The adults have figured out a RefugeInAudacity. I mean, really, ''all'' their kids say their vampires, and ''never'' change their minds...?

I'm more impressed by the fact that you took the idea of vampires not being able to have children and shooting it in the head.

In This Tropers class someone dropped a bag of marijuana in full view of the teacher picked up the bag and slowly put it away. Nothing bad happened to him; the teacher either didn't notice or thought that he was delusional.

Or maybe the teacher wanted the marijuana for himself?

This Troper has become something of a MemeticBadass / BadassBookworm at his school thanks to this. There is an infamous history teacher who nearly everyone in the school is afraid of. Someone in speech once compared him to an axe murderer. Seemingly the only person not afraid of him is yours truly. After making several thinly veiled dirty jokes during class presentations, MSTing some of the really cheesy movies we had to watch, and falling asleep in his class with no consequence, despite the teacher's reputation as a huge Umbridge. And he ''still'' gets some of the higher, if not highest grades in that class. Cue murderous glances when tests are given back.

You sound like someone I'd really dislike.

Quite the contray to me, you sound like someone I love. And to be honest a bit like me.

ThisTroper goes to a school that is straight-stickety-up-the-ass about students not having food or drink anywhere outside the cafeteria. So, naturally, a group of students once worked together to smuggle in table linens, hot tea, hot coffee, fine china, sugar, and an assortment of little biscuits and cakes and ''had a fucking tea party''. In the ''library''. Naturally, they got away with it.

That sounds like CrowningMomentOfAwesome material, personally.

''Total'' CrowningMomentOfAwesome. It's also CMoF if they were all perfectly polite and quiet (hopefully with the pinky bit when drinking tea), because, well, it's a library.

Basically, any time This Troper puts on his "not fucking kidding face" is going to be this. Examples include:

Going to retrieve a book left in the classroom of a teacher notorious for stopping her lessons to lecture kids for silly things such as leaving a book. Yours truly ''stomped'' in with his "not fucking kidding face" ''flipped the bird'' to the teacher, gave a death glare to the student sitting in the desk where Troper's book was, and then flipped the overhead projector off during his way out. Nobody spoke during the whole time and your truly didn't get punished for it.

Another time yours truly heard a commotion in an adjacent classroom that sounded suspiciously like a bird had flown in the window. Our teacher, fearing it was an actual intruder, told us to stay put, but judging from how bad the racket was no one was getting the bird out. Yours truly had his "not fucking kidding face" as he marched in, grabbed the bird in ''mid flight'', tossed it out the window, and slammed the window shut. Once he got back there was silence until the bell rang five minutes later.

That sounds more like a CrowningMomentOfAwesome than this trope

ROTC Combatives training. Yours truly was up against one of the better fighters in a king of the hill match. Cue "not fucking kidding face" and blatantly standing up, walking off the mat, getting a drink of water from the fountain outside the room, and then walking back in and onto the mat, immediately pinning his opponent. The referee allowed it, citing a line from some manual about being prepared for the unexpected.

Bullshit, he just didn't wanna fuck with the Face of Death.

I just had to stop and edit a page for the first time ever just to let you know how awesomely cool and hilarious I found your stories to be.

Another good (J)ROTC story comes out of this Troper's twin. When her shoelaces broke before inspection, she wired them shut by using bobby pins and bent paperclips. The Master chief inspecting looked her over before commenting "About the shoes, Cadet..." Twin quipped, "Future Navy Engineer, Master Chief!" Master Chief was visibly trying not to snicker through the rest.

For an advanced placement history class presentation, this troper stated to the class that I wrote a nice, long report on Malcom X, all carefully done...and then tore it up and threw it in the trash, saying that would be boring. (But that part was a convincing act to get the class' attention; I didn't actually write squat.) I then proceeded to do a four to five minute rant on the topic ''completely on the fly, with no real planning or any idea of where I was going with it''. When I asked the class to discuss the topic, there was only stunned silence, and instead of freaking out over the lack of response, I calmly declared them "Too shy", and went along with the presentation. There was also some totally-not-school-okay cussing when I got to mentioning my feelings about white supremacists. And when a (much more popular and attractive) girl tried to lay her head down to sleep, I went up and knocked on her desk and asked her to wake up in a "You're going to pay attention when I talk whether you like it or not" tone, and she never did it again the rest of the rant. When I found out got a B on a presentation which I did absolutely no real work for, didn't get in trouble for swearing in class, and never suffered any social repercussion as an unpopular social pariah for being rude to some of the most popular kids in school, I thought to herself "Why yes, my life IS awesome."

''You'' thought to ''her''self? Funny, I've never thought to anyone's self but mine.

Well she went beyond the impossible.

This troper has spent nearly 32 years refining this to an art form, starting more or less from the moment of birth:

It took 48 hours of labor for my mother to deliver my 8-pound, 14-ounce self, and there was no such thing as a "planned C-section" in 1977. My mother said to me when I was age ten or so, "After what I went through to give birth to you, you shouldn't be giving me lip" and I said "After what you went through to give birth to me, you should've known parenthood was gonna be hell."

In high school, I put a virus on the school's writing lab computer that gave me file-system root access from the terminal at my desk. I'd upload all manner of (PG-rated) craziness and set it to randomly display on the other terminals, interrupting the other students' work. When I finally got caught, the teacher said "You put a computer virus on my writing lab!" and I said "I also beat up your son. All you had to do was ask nicely and I wouldn't have done either. But the fun part is that you're stuck with me because Mr. Sullivan's so proud of this school's low dropout rate and he wouldn't take too kindly to you doing anything to raise it." (Mr. Sullivan was one of those micromanagers from hell but he had tenure---I love school board politics!) An agreement was reached whereby I'd fix the computers after school (and stop bullying the teacher's kid) and no further action was taken against me.

Math teacher: "Where's your homework?" Me: "My dog ate it." Teacher: "Your dog ate it? What kind of lame excuse is that?" Me: "Well, I ran out of paper so I had to write it on what I had available. Too bad all I had to write on were dog biscuits." Teacher: "OK, I've never heard that one before, but don't do it again." Me: "OK, next time I don't have any paper, I'll drag the vet to my house and write on him.f Dog won't go near it."

Does ScrewySquirrel have a TroperTales section? 'Cause I've got a million of these.

God I hope so! I'd love to hear every one, these are hilarious!

ThisTroper loves playing [=AssaultCube=] on the school computers on free days during BCIS. With the teacher right behind him. She is also looking over him typing this. Ha ha.

In elementary school this troper got a detention from a really mean teacher for no real reason. Her two closest friends did too. She convinced them to skip it. They did. She decided to take it a step further and walk all to slowly past that teachers room. Making sure the teacher saw her she walked out of the school and went home. The teacher never mentioned it again.

This troper's friend hadn't done his Latin assignment, which was rather important for his final mark, and the teacher had previously declared that anyone who didn't have at least a rough draft of his assignment ready for that class would get a 0. That friend happened to sit RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE TEACHER. He had not done anything at all, so during the whole class he started doing his assignment...Right in front of the teacher. The teacher then turned to him, about 10 minutes before he went to check the assignments and asked him "Mr. Mendonza, are you doing your assignment right now?". That person laughed, put on a really convincing smile and said "Sir, with all due respect, do you really think I would do that right in front of you? On that note, I would also like to confess that I was the one who stole the class plans that were supposed to be given to the supply teacher last week." The teacher laughed, and went on to check it only at the end of the period. What made the situation even funnier was that not only had he NOT done the assignment, he also had indeed stolen the class plans from the supply teacher.

During senior year of high school, This Troper and a group of her friends decided to play Holika. For those of you unfamiliar with Holika, it is the Hindu festival of colors, which is traditionally celebrated by throwing powdered dye on friends while wearing white. Unfortunately, the only time when all interested parties could play was during school lunch. The students went outside, played Holika, got entirely covered in blue, red, purple, orange, green, and yellow dye, and then paraded back into the school, laughing loudly and taking pictures. When questioned by the principal, who was understandably upset, we explained that we were carrying out a cultural observance as part of our school's tradition as a language magnet. No punishment was ever issued, and all parties involved went through the rest of the school day painted head to toe in radioactively bright dye.

This troper is definitely going to use that next time there's Holi. And I was wondering how to celebrate it at home before I read this...

This troper once had to explain to a literature teacher that, "I don't have the essay due today, but I've got a ''really'' good excuse. My house burned down last night". The teacher was notorious for not accepting any excuses ever, but this was evidently so audacious that the note from my parents confirming it wasn't necessary to get out of it.

This troper and a friend of hers engaged in some, em, immoral liaisons several times. Both of them confessed to the rest of the nakama, going into a nearly pornographic description of the details. The response? "You guys can say it all you like but I'm still not going to believe you". This is made even more amusing by everyone wanting the troper and friend to hook up.

Want her, I can't leave her, I won't live without her, she's my no tell lover…

This troper got by for four days walking around his private school out of uniform by being flagrantly out of uniform - as in, jeans and a Clap Your Hands Say Yeah t-shirt instead of a polo and khakis.

This troper did something similar after getting the charity non-uniform day mixed up in his diary, the kicker being as he was entering a physics class the student behind him - who was wearing more uniform - got pulled up for wearing non-uniform trousers.

This troper went to a similar high school that required a tie as part of the dress code. One of his friends forgot it and crafted a replacement out of notebook paper. He got through half the day before one of the teachers noticed that the tie was not really a tie. He further got off because, as he pointed out to the disipinarian, there was a rule requiring a tie, which he had, but did not specify any materials the tie could not be made out of, such as notebook paper.

This Troper's high school choir requires a red bow tie for the guys' formal uniform. Often, HilarityEnsues when people forget some piece of the uniform, but the most ridiculous moment would be the time when somebody stuck a ''red sock'' down his shirt, having the tip stick out where a bow tie would normally be. If anyone noticed, they didn't comment on it.

Emulators of the GameBoy are rather popular in this troper's school. Usually, teachers barely pay attention to this since they think they're just doing work, so most students who have an emulator and a few ROMs are often playing {{Pokemon}} instead of school work, getting off scott free in doing so.

This troper has a friend who crashed a rather well-known science-fiction convention for multiple days by using colored electrical tape to change his 1-Day Pass into a 3-Day Pass. When he finally got confronted by one of the security guard on his way out of the dealer's area, said friend smiled widely and whispered "Thank goodness you stopped me! You're the first person all day to look at the day, not just the badge color!" He then flashed his work ID, gave his company name as that of a private security firm that had been hired to test the volunteer security and then took the guard's name so that they would know who to report as actually doing their job. He then left the convention, deciding not to push his luck any further... but happy that he had conned his way out of being caught with style.

Of all the examples on this list, and a lot of them are gold, this is the Crowning Moment Of Ballsy.

This troper had a friend who, when asked to write an essay on John Cage's ''4' 33"'', turned in a blank sheet of paper with his name on it. (The net effect was that he converted an essay into an oral presentation...)

To anyone who didn't get the joke, ''4'33"'' is a three movement piece of "music" composed of four minutes and thirty-three seconds of... the incidental sounds of wherever it's performed. Originally written for piano, it's been re-orchestrated many times including one for a performance by the BBC Symphony Orchestra.

This troper once turned in a blank page with just my name on it for an oral communications assignment and proceeded to give a five-minute ''non sequitur'' for the speech portion. When asked about this later, I replied "Well even my computer couldn't keep up with me." A-

This troper and his friend were supposed to make a brief (5 minute limit) long video for our math class for a presentation. While we were filming, things got a little out of hand and we ended up with a 25 minute long spy movie spoof featuring a guy who wasn't even in the class with about 2 minutes of math about a third of the way in. Not wanting to waste the film or the storyline, we just improved the editing a little and submitted the entire video as the project. It was a good 10 minutes in before the teacher realized what we had done. Her expression was priceless as the only relevant math section ended, and the movie kept going on and on for another 15 minutes. She later admitted that we would have gotten points off for going one or two minutes over, but that going 20 minutes over was just so absurd that she didn't take anything off.

This troper and his lab group once did the same thing for a chemistry video project, except we made a Godzilla spoof, complete with badly dubbed dialogue, and a sequence over the end credits where this troper danced to an Eiffel 65 song. The actual chemistry part was barely 90 seconds long, and the rest was just shots of us running around with airsoft gns and shooting at things off camera. The video ended up being three times longer than it needed to be (and it had to be 10 minutes long), and the teacher ''loved it''. As a bonus, the dancing became a school Mutation}} meme, and this troper was constantly being stopped in the halls for weeks afterward.

I'm imagining that happening, but with thhe Star dance. My brain is exploding with the sheer awesomeness of that image.

This troper had to put up with every jerk in his high school classes (at a very conservative southern Baptist school) making constant blisteringly obvious sexual innuendo because, presumably getting away with it because the teachers assumed they couldn't ''possibly'' be talking about such ''lewd things.'' Of course, one of our teachers did get it and told them to stop (she was, by complete coincidence, made principal a few years later), and one, a ''female Bible teacher,'' got the jokes and ''didn't do anything,'' because, basically, boys will be boys. Yeah, I went to a weird school.

My old Bible teacher was not very well-liked and so the entire class got a lot of enjoyment out of confusing her. At one point during class, someone started a game of BS (the card game), and the teacher asked what that stood for. The resident PluckyComicRelief said "Bible Study" ''and the teacher believed him.''

This troper can think of two examples and both involve trying to get out of a spanking. The first involved this troper's uncle being told to get "the biggest switch he could find" to be whipped with. After being gone for five minutes the uncle's mother came out to find him dragging back a half-rotten and very LARGE log. The other involves this troper's brother, after being told to "drag your ass over here", plopping down to the floor and scooting over. In both cases the parent was laughing too hard to go through with the spanking.

My dad and all his brothers did the same thing when they were younger and told to get a switch, only they got the smallest ones they could find.

This troper once calmly walked into a church committee meeting and announced, "Sorry I'm late. I was playing Nintendo and lost track of time." Silence reigned for a moment, and then the pastor declared, "That's the best excuse ever. Have a seat."

This Troper's friend's excuse for not being at some fairly important church meeting was that he was busy cutting up a pineapple.

This troper had her house rolled during her senior year of highschool. I got revenge by putting nightcrawlers into the lockers at school. After admitting to being the one to do it, not only did I not get in trouble but teachers congratulated me. And people say being a teacher's pet is a bad thing.

This troper once had a final exam that consisted solely of the question "What is the meaning of life?" He picked up the exam paper, sat down, then brought it back to the teacher thirty seconds later, having written only "Life is very much like death, but with more breathing." He got 100%.

Similar to this, this troper heard through a friend of a philosophy final where the students were required to logically prove the existence of a chair the prof put in front of the class. One genius wrote, "What chair" got up and left. Said individual aces the final.

Sounds like an Urban Legend to this troper [[http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/oneword.asp]]

One more example: a guy this troper knows told a story told about a legendarily hard teacher who, for one midterm, decided that students would get ''negative'' points on any questions where they gave wrong answers. So, as soon as the exams were handed out, he wrote his name on the top, turned it in blank for zero points, and started walking out the door. "Hey, what are you doing?" asked the teacher. "Beating the average", he said. (Oh, and he beat the average.)

Philosophy classes are rife with this. This troper got a B on a written exam in a college philosophy test because I started off admitting that I had no idea what the question was about, then wrote three pages of the most pure, unadulterated bullshit I have ever come up with, full of compound complex sentences, parenthetical digressions, and obscure analogies. The Professor's note beside the grade was "When I read this fast enough, it sounded like it made sense." I later found out that he had very little respect for the philosopher the test was on.

Very minor, but This Troper, the other day, got away with, in brazen view of three waitresses, taking a York miniature peppermint pattie from the counter of the restaraunt without paying - they were US$0.25, but I thought they were free (as most restaraunts have after-dinner mints available freely), and simply didn't ask. So they watched me abscond with the mint and didn't say a word; I felt like a heel when I was told they weren't free. Inadvertant Refuge in Audacity?

That, or they thought (as I do) that paying a quarter for a freaking peppermint is just retarded. Why have it on the counter if it isn't free?

They're usually for charity. There's a card full of spots for quarters and when the card fills up they give it to a kid with cancer or something.

This troper remembers a girl who was constantly getting teased, mostly by being called 'mouse'. One day, dead mice showed up in the lockers of all the tormentors. They appealed to the teachers, but nothing was done about it, and they quickly stopped picking on her.

When BT were converting from hard-wire telephone to plug-in ones, the editor's father was charged with the task - as Time & Motions Manager - to oversee the conversion taking place at a hospital. Some high-ranking person from admin noted that the BT plug boxes were white and the office decor was mainly black and asked the T&M Manager to see to it that the plug boxes were painted to match. The T&M Manager assigned the task to a bod and when the assignment came back there was £1500 (early eighties, remeber) of ruined plug boxes. The bod painting them done such a thourough job, he painted the inside of the socket. The higher-ups wanted this bod sacked, he was four weeks away from retirement, if sacked now not only would he lose his job but also his pension. The T&M Manager fought to save the bod's pension say that he would keep him out of the way for the next four weeks. The admin were baying for blood, they where having none of it, they were quoting all sorts of code as to why 'instant dismissal' is the only course of action. The T&M Manager, who was also a union leader, knew how to negotiate. He calmly responded to the admins' argument "Well, that's not what it says on this bit of paper!" said as he waved it aloft, the admins backed-down. Of course the 'bit of paper' say anything that agreed with the admins because it was [[spoiler:blank!]]

ThisTroper's mother is a teacher. She once had a student walk into her room, talking at the top of his lungs, in almost-not-suitable-for-school language, on a subject definitely not suitable for school. She, gritting her teeth, says, "ANTONIO! Go back out that door and come in this classroom the ''right'' way." The young man does an abrupt about-face, heads out the door, and comes back in on his knees with his hands in a pleading position. It worked perfectly to defuse the situation.

On a homework, one of ThisTroper's friends took a RefugeInAudacity. The problem was: "Using Kirchoff's equations, derive x equation." For those uninitiated, Kirchoff's equations deal with electrical circuits, and the important thing was that he had a couple of equations to manipulate around to find a different one. He was a)being lazy, and b) sure that he would make an algebraic error somewhere and needlessly extend his work. So, he wrote down Kirchoff's equations, wrote "Math happens" below them, and then wrote the final equation. He got full points.

One of this troper's friends did something similar; he just wrote "I don't remember the formula because I didn't study hard enough." He got partial credit for honesty.

This troper remembers a Math teacher who managed a pre-emptive one. He was talking about Fermat's Last Theorem and mentioned the infamous "I have a truly marvellous proof of this proposition which this margin is too narrow to contain" line. He said that anyone who tried it on a test would get full marks on that question, but it would only work once. I never found out if anyone tried it.

Same for my sophomore year math teacher, just not for that specific thing. She'd accept that excuse for any graph, but only once.

The seniors of this troper's high school are masters of this trope, once dispersing stink bombs in every hallway of the school with nary a punishment involved.

ThisTroper was a bit of a Teacher's Pet in High School. It wasn't that she'd suck up to them, it was that she'd give good impressions at first, with occasional bits to reinforce those impressions. The end result was that she could get away with a lot more than her classmates could, simply because the teacher wouldn't believe she would actually do it. The iconic example was when she was feeling a tad punchy on an AP English Composition homework. The homework was from a grammar textbook, and the question was essentially, "write a sentence using semicolons." The teacher tended to check to see if you'd done the homework at the beginning of class, and then go over it by moving up and down the room one question/person at a time. Well, we start going over this homework, and I realize that the semicolon question will be landing on me. I just start grinning. The teacher finally calls on me, and he had definitely noticed my grin and was expecting something good. I simply said, "Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause... kids." The teacher had a look of shock on his face. It got even better. I was sitting in almost the very back corner. As soon as I finish, the half-ring of kids around me crack up, a beat later the ring around them cracks up, and so on and so forth. Just as the teacher is quieting the class down, I overhear someone explaining it to the girl in the opposite corner of the room from me.

With the same teacher, everyone was required to read Moby Dick (after the first 6 chapters, ThisTroper took refuge in BookRags). The final exam on it was simply to "Write an essay on Moby Dick." So what did ThisTroper write hers on? She wrote it on how Herman Mellville was an idiot who DidNotDoTheResearch on his Greek Mythology. While grading the essays in the next class, the teacher calls her up to his desk. He then pulls down ''every book on Greek mythology that he has'' and consults each and every one of them. He then turns to her and says, "Y'know what? You're right..." The best part was that she hadn't even ''read'' the part of Moby Dick that had had the messed up mythology, and it had only been mentioned in passing by the notes she had.

On the same note of good first impressions, this teacher would also do his time management based on how good your first couple of essays that he assigned you to do turned out. After that, he'd read the introduction and the conclusion and give you your grade based on them. This was on essays that usually spanned 5 to 8 pages. One of ThisTroper's friends actually tested this. He wrote an essay, and inserted a 1000-word paragraph in the middle that consisted entirely of "blah blah blah blabity blah blah." The teacher never noticed.

This troper's philosophy class final exam last semester consisted of the professor writing on the board: "Why?" The troper and several other students immediately launched into long papers, but one of her friends in the class got a 100% on the final. Only two words other than her name on the paper: "Why not?"

This troper is sorry, but he doesn't believe you. Too much like a famous Urban Legend [[http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/oneword.asp]]

It happens, actually. This Troper had to write a story made entirely out of cliche phrases. He walked into the classroom the day it was due and said ''his dog ate it''. He got a lot of laughter and an A grade.

A teacher in this troper's high school claims to have done this when he was in college, and earned an A. He also said that one of his classmates wrote down "Just because." He got a C.

This troper has witnessed a girl trying to pull down another girl's shirt ''in the school cafeteria.''

This troper's senior religion teacher positively adored her. The first semester I had her, I was in her last period. The second semester, I was in her fifth period and happened to have the last period free. My sixth period was AP English. I also happened to have second period free. One day I realised I had forgotten to write a 3-5 page essay for English... so, during second period, I emailed the aforementioned teacher, told her bluntly, "I forgot to do this assignment and it's due sixth period. Can I come to your last period class instead?" The teacher said yes, the essay got turned in, and I established a precedent for the rest of my last semester of high school. My teacher later told me that she didn't care when I came to class, as long as I attended a full class period. One day I needed the first half of fifth to talk to a friend who was having a really hard time. I went to the second half of class and showed up for the first half of eighth. It's now a RunningGag between us.

I was doing a research project for English class in the Library. Because I had read a certain amount of books from the library (5 per grading period; not much at all for me) I was eligible to get a free drink and nachos. The problem was I wasn't there that day and the reward took place four weeks ago. The bell is about to ring in five minutes. I grab a sticky note, write "I have taken the Sprite I was owed four weeks ago for reading; sincerely, Troper," walk straight past the librarians, past the line of computers, into the librarians office, grab the sprite, stick the note on the door, open the sprite with a loud fizz by the teacher, and leave.

Of course, this backfired a couple days later; I left a minute before the bell rang(after sleeping through class while the AxCrazy English teacher ranted about how dumb the class was and went over the test we took [I had a perfect score]) when I noticed that most everybody else in the class was gone. I figured the bell had already rang (since everybody else was crowded around the teacher's desk), and I leave. She notices I'm not there, and I find out that I barely avoided getting detention for skipping and that everybody else who had left (about 15 kids) had asked.

Once in primary school, ThisTroper was in this big thing called "Tournament of the Minds." We had to come up with a short play about a self-help group. She doesn't remember too much of it, just that she played an alcholic Postman Pat who literally ''wore'' the mail [and yes, we were in costume] instead of carrying it, and that the whole play was just as random and insane. Her group were runners-up, out of every school in the region.

Last year our English class had three debates about ''Equus''. For my team's debate, we were going against the message of the play and the other team were better English students, so we were definitely expecting to lose. During the debate, we were losing, but this troper came up with a new strategy. Normally while we'd been studying it, everyone would dance around the issue of the protagonist's ritual for formality's sake. That was how the book demonstrated it's message, and what this troper realised that bucking the trend and being quite blunt about the ritual would likely work in our favour this time, because it would invoke Squick reactions, and when it's put so directly, no-one in the class would want to endorse a horse. Again, only realised this during the debate itself, but I was last and centered my talk around it, and it pulled us back up to a draw.

This troper once found himself stuck in a meeting on his last day at a particular job. Without meaning to, he farted. It was silent, and utterly deadly. When the owner of the company asked, "Who farted?", this troper simply stood up, said, "That was me, sir. I was trying to give a shit, but that was the best I could manage," and walked out.

Do me a favor and cross-post this to Crowning Moment of Awesome.

This troper managed a veiled Refuge in Audacity. I really despised a principal in my school at one point (he had a tendency to be a real douchebag), and one day I lost it. I was known for sharing odd bits of trivia with the faculty because I really liked sharing my knowledge with the world, so when I offered to show my knowledge of Japanese to the guy, I said, "Ohayo, koucho-yaro". Loosely translated, I told him it meant "Hello, principal", which is technically true. What I didn't tell him was that the suffix -yaro made what I said "Hello, bastard principal."

Back in High School, we had an English assignment to complete, I did the assignment but my dog ate the homework...which is exactly what I told my teacher who let me off.

ThisTroper's high school prohibits carrying book bags from class to class, as well as having many other rules and regulations that seem arbitrary and drive students up the wall. In retaliation, a guy has taken to transporting his belongings in rather...unusual ways. At first he carried his books in a little red wagon, but he had trouble getting it up and down stairs, so he now ties a huge laundry basket to his back to carry his books with. He been doing this for months and has not gotten in trouble because he isn't using a book bag.

This troper's middle school graduation required formal dress. He complied, but his tie was six inches long.

This troper's class had something similar for class picture day. Half the guys deliberately got the stupidest looking ties we could find (mine had the colgate toothpaste logo on it). However, one guy one-upped everyone by showing up dressed like Pee Wee Herman. And got away with it, partially because technically it ''was'' formalwear, and partially because the teacher thought it was hilarious. (the teacher had a looney tunes tie)

This troper's sister gets points for telling an English teacher known for his explosions, "I never said that! YOU said that!" when he began that great English-teacher tradition of putting words into the mouth of anyone you disagree with to make what they're actually saying seem stupid.

This troper goes to a school where just about anybody--EXCEPT HER-- can get away with ''anything''. The most notorious example was this one student in her TV/Video Productions class who ditched his classes...37 TIMES! It took the ''thirty-seventh'' time for him to get into any real trouble for it, and by then he had dropped out for the year. When this troper found out about this, she yelled, "Oh, HE doesn't get in trouble for ditching class, but I get in trouble for 'throwing a fit'?! WHAT THE F--K?!" Apparently, the admins thought that ''no one'' was crazy/dumb enough to ditch school 37 times; judging by the kind of school this troper goes to, they should've known better.

This troper's friend one came to english class a minute befor the class ended. His exuse? "The planets alligned and I had a burst of creativity." He was wiriting fan-fiction.

I consider this a CrowningMomentOfAwesome as well: anyway, this college group I'm in has a system called Of The Months, where we can write a small essay about a person, group, or institution that we feel has been outstanding during a certain month. Well, I wrote one about ''myself''. In it, I intimated that Kamina was based on me and that Powerthirst was my sweat, among other awesome things. Get this - it was named the best in its category for the month.

This troper worked in a group to come up with some kind of project regarding boy and health. The time for it spanned over most of the semester. While most of the other kids focused on eating disorders, aclohol, drugs and what have you, her group made a kinda crappy video about... beards. And got a top grade for it.

This troper, back in seventh grade, kick another student in the balls so hard he fell to the ground in front of several teachers, us being the only ones left in the hallway. I got a funny stare from one of them, but just walked away and was never disciplined for it.

This troper ran for school captain in his last year of high school. I had never been the most popular kid in school--all the popular kids were forbidden to run--so the election for male school captain came down to me and another guy, a teacher's pet/stooge and an absolute douchebag. It was a pretty well-known fact that the teachers ignored the students' votes and just picked the guy and girl they liked the best, so I said as much. In my "Vote for me!" speech to the entire school. And as I'd correctly surmised, the teachers didn't do a damn thing to stop me once I'd started because shutting down the guy who claims the election is rigged against him can have a few PR repercussions. For the next week I got people I didn't know and people who'd previously declared their everlasting hatred of me (though less eloquently and with more swearing) coming up to me and saying they'd vote for me 'cause they liked my speech and better me than a stooge-douchebag. I didn't win. Does that count as a RefugeInAudacity for my school?

This troper spent a lovely afternoon in Union Square, NY, dressed as a crazy person (complete with inside-out bathrobe) with a seven-foot long fibreglass great white shark fitted with an old belt for a collar. I asked passersby for donations to buy shark food for Herman (the shark) because he was "doing poorly". About 80% got it. Oh, and I made thirty bucks.

This Troper once did not do the assignment for a class, which involved posting on Blackboard ( a college listserv type thing). The Professor began the class scolding her for not having posted, and asked if she'd read. She said yes. He asked her about what she'd 'read' and,because she'd taken a similar class the semester before, she got all the answers right. The Professor publicly apologized for having presumed she hadn't read.

This Troper once got out of a fight with two drunk guys by saying "Let's settle this like men" and then shouting "DANCE OFF!" The guys were too stunned to actually do anything and then too amused by the time I started moonwalking to actually fight.

In ThisTroper 's ELEMENTARY SCHOOL, there was a bully who got away with raping a fourth grade girl (incidentally his MoralEventHorizon moment) on this principle.

Wait, ''what?''

Wait, WHAAAAAAATTTTT.

Wait, WHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTT?

I don't want to know more, but the logical part of my mind wants to know how this ''worked''.

And this troper ''really'' wants to know if he eventually got his comeuppance.

Uh, he was kicked in the balls by a different girl, and was expelled three months later for a different incident involving blackmailing an injured person into attacking one of their own friends on threat of further injury.

This troper once tried to cop a feel on a pretty girl, but was caught. Not knowing what to do to mitigate her circumstances, she began ''twisting the girl's breasts'' while shouting '''"TUNE IN TO TOKYO! TUNE IN TO TOKYO!"''' at the top of her lungs. And making beeping noises. It worked.

Seriously? You probably got away with it because people thought you had a severe mental disorder and didn't know better, you JerkAss.

Yeah, if you tried that on me or my friends, I would knock the crap out of you, regardless of mental stability.

OP refers to herself as a female. It's much easier for ladies to get away with that kind of thing.

More minor example than some: In middle school, the number of rude comments about this troper's wool sweaters, which were (and are) drastically nerdy but nothing to write home about, was OverNineThousand. Walk into school wearing - I kid you not - a floor-length, grape-lollipop-colored, tiered skirt with five rows of quarter-sized silver disks on it, the kind ''never'' seen anywhere but on a gypsy fortuneteller? Not one nasty comment (on my attire; the rest of my behavior was fair game as usual) ''all day''. This happened every single time I wore that skirt. Only one possible explanation.

You are a girl, right? Because otherwise that's just taking it too far... or is it?

This Troper was once having a very dull French lesson, with a teacher who would stress over anything. His mate was in the same kind of mood during the lesson, so when the part came to practice vocab in pairs both of us just decided to spend that time talking about more interesting things. The teacher didn't like this, and realising we weren't bothering split us up, telling me to "go and sit over there" she said pointing at a table at the other side of the room. Naturally, this Troper happily obliged, and left his mate to go and sit ''on'' the table. It took the teacher a couple of minutes what I'd done. When she twigged, she yelled "Sit on a chair". Again, this Troper complied, and sat on the back of the chair, with the chair facing backwards. Once the teacher said "the right way" he then turned the chair around, still sat on the back, and with his feet where the ass normally goes. At this point the teacher was fuming, and threw him out of the class, saying "You can come back in once you do what you're told". So naturally, this Troper walks out of the class, only to walk back in moments later saying "I did everything you asked me to, what next?" The teacher was speechless, and gave up trying to punish me, due to there just being five minutes left of the lesson.

You childish wanker.

It's called RefugeInAudacity for a reason.

This Troper got rather good at Capture the Flag in summer camp by pushing this as far as it would go. Run to the other side, you'll get tagged. Walk to the other side, you'll get tagged. Walk to the other side while singing a song, you might get tagged. His team won, though, after the discovery of "Choreographed song and dance number to the other side and back." Nobody came near him, assuming him to be a distraction.

Not-so-awesome example; on occasion, my mother will lie to my face [don't know if she does it to my brother and dad, although it seems likely] ''even if she knows that I know the truth'', and then even if corrected, she'll still cling to her story. See, the trick is, it'll get to the point where it's either back off or outright accuse her of lying, and her being in a position of authority, the latter option just makes things worse.

Ahaha. This troper's friend is this and a bit. He wears a freaking Death Cloak to school and nobody says anything about it. He's basically evil incarnate. It turns out that Evil's a fun guy. :D

...Can I marry your friend?

This troper went to a school where cellullar phones were banned and confiscated (though later returned without theft, it was a good school) when he was younger. One of his classmates brought an 80s era phone the size of his arm complete with long antenna, knowing it would draw attention once taken.

This troper one day went hanging out with some friends mainly to watch a few movies and light a few fire crackers. Anyway I forgot to call my parents and since I don't a have cell phone there was no way for them to reach me. They called the cops to look for me. Once I found this out after remembering to call them at a quarter to midnight I got a ride from a friend. My friends brother was driving and clueless. So I told him "Hurry the cops are looking for me". He thought I was joking and we drove to my place. Knowing My parents would chew me out when I got home I asked them if they knew anything that would seem unbelievable enough I get away. I even mentioned this trope name and used what I just said of the cops are looking for me as a example. He thought I was joking. Anyway It seems my parents are cool and are just happy I'm alive. ----

During this troper's class, we were supposed to write a metaphor. One classmate submitted "Life is depraved shit " and got out of both actually making the metaphor and cursing in class. Oh, and the same school has a rule of not allowing students go to the moped shed. Every single break it's full of people and time to time someone drives around in the yard of the school. Teachers do nothing, and never have done, even though it used to be reminded often when the rule came to pass.

This Troper basically got a perfect grade his entire physics class. When it came time for the final, he answered every question with a Batman logo. He got full marks and the note "I know you know it."

What. What? WWWWWHHHHHHAAAAATTTTTT...!?! I mean... I just... how could... can we switch physics teachers?

This troper was once in class doing a project with two people he'd been forced to do a group project with. Neither of them would shut up. Neither of them would listen to me when I told them to word already, you lazy bums. Everyone in the class wouldn't shut up. The teacher wouldn't force my partners to do their work. It was a hot day. So, I did the oly logical thing I could think of--I ''purposely fell out of my chair and '''faked passing out''', falling onto the floor and keeping my eyes closed for a few seconds.'' The teacher got the nurse. It took me at least 20 minutes to convince her that I was fine, let me get to my next class already. ** On a similar note, this troper has also argued with that same nurse to let him stay in school after having upchucked due to acid reflux.

This Troper had friends at high school who seemed to run on this trope. One went so far as to hack the school network and leave porn on the vice-principal's desktop just to see how much detention he could get two days prior to graduation. The answer was literally ''three days''. And he served ''none'' of it before he graduated.

This troper's friend decided he wasn't going to take any more crap from his science teacher, and this one decided to help him out. His's friend left the room, causing the very anal teacher to follow him out and proced to give him a verbal curb stomp. He followed him out, and got the teacher to turn around, in which time the friend got away. Eventually, this troper said, "All that is very interesting, but I hope you know I was just a distraction." the teacher turns around, stunned, and goes on a murderous searching rampage for the friend. This troper leaves. we both got out a full half-an-hour early for that stunt, and were immortalized by half the school

This troper, while taking a ground aviation class, told her her hard-ass-showed-grisly-photos-of-what-happens-to-you-if-you-screw-around-in-the-first-week, extremely strict, veteran professor who didn't accept excuses for shit, that the reason she missed a test was because she had to catch a pig. She was allowed to take it and got a decent though not outstanding grade. Note: I truly did get pulled into catching a pig, I was furious because I knew what my teacher was like and was convinced I'd get a very big zero. I've also had a cat, who chased the deer away all the years we had him, eat my homework. Course there nobody believed me until I showed them all the papery remains.

My grandma, a now-retired Art Teacher, had a student bring in the corner of a homework assignment which had obviously been chewed up and she gave him a pass, too. It's far from uncommon for it to actually happen, all teachers need is proof, and they'll either give you a pass or an extension, it's practically policy.

I mentioned my 9th grade Algebra teacher over in the page for CloudCuckooLander with his ability to be distracted by mentions of barnyard animals. One kid in my class had the balls to simply write "The Cow Goes Moo." on a major test and got an A.

A failed moment happened in the same class. A kid named Nick was listening to music on headphones LOUDLY. The teacher tells him to bring them up. He does, but just the headphones. The kid then tries to claim that the headphones are magic so he doesn't have to hand over his CD player as well. It failed, but most of us were laughing our asses off that he had the balls to try it.

In junior and senior years I was a member of Jazz Band and we'd often be able to go play in the practice rooms. This resulted in a number of these tales. The best of which involved us roaming the halls at random, interrupting a choir concert practice by walking into the auditorium and chatting with friends onstage, then all of us randomly joined another kid's class and just hung out despite the teacher being an infamous hardass. He was just too shocked that we'd come in to have security remove us. We further derailed his lesson by starting a euchre tournament in the room. We never got even a slight scolding. We tried the same thing again, but despite never getting in trouble for our roaming of the halls, we'd get kicked out of any classroom we invaded after the first time. Still, those were fun times.

A friend got one from her sister. She offered her sister a cracker to eat and the sister's reason for not taking it: "I can't eat that, I have to sneeze." This was followed by her not sneezing. The friend was too shocked by the absurdity to respond.

I posted this in another page as well, but one time on campus I saw a guy talking to his girlfriend. The girlfriend was blabbing on and on and the guy kept trying to stop her and tell her that he was going to be late for his lecture. Eventually he pointed behind her and yelled, "Look! A distraction!" and while she was turned around, he RAN. From what my friend and I could see while I was doubled-over with laughter, she was too shocked to be pissed at him. This may not be a proper example, though, as I highly suspect that he caught hell for it later.

Back in high school, this one student would show up drnuk roughly 4 times a week. On a field trip, he was caught with a flak of whiskey that had his name on it! He was not punished.

This troper once told his science teacher that doing the assignment was against my belief that...My time was better spent watching buffy. While I didn't get a grade, I didn't get punished either.

In theater class, this troper's group included 7 people: six girls and one guy (your truly). Problem? our play had only six characters, of which two were males. What could we do? Well, the final play had Eunice turned into ''a pair of siamese'', Tom was played by a girl, and Leona became an ''over-the-top drag queen'' angel, complete with ''Dancing Queen'' playing as I was introduced.

This troper was once told he had to read about 100 pages of The Hobbit in one two hour class. Sitting in the front row in front of my teacher's desk I pulled out the book of lolcats and sat reading it quite a few times in two hours. At the end of the period he laughed and just let me go.

This troper is fully convinced that if you aren't trying at least something like this in high school, yur doin it wrong. A few of his personal highlights:

Too many people try the "fake name in the yearbook" trick with obvious names, like Michael Jordan or the current president. This troper got away with it by using the name Harmon Killebrew. What's even better is that his English teacher was in charge of putting together the yearbook - so she knew him personally.

Once, for a video report, he was in a group with someone born deaf. Not only that, English was his second language - he could speak it, but with unusual diction. It was obvious that the teacher expected him to handle all the technical duties. Our group was having none of that. He got to appear in one of our "commercials". Advertising audio books for the blind. And as a sample, he read one of the sex scenes from The Bridges Of Madison County. The teacher was so astounded when that part was played that she couldn't actually ''grade'' us until the next day. And eventually got the A!

His French teacher had a beloved cookie jar shaped like a cow that would moo when opened. He'd regularly take it by just grabbing it, putting it on his desk, and simply responding, "Oui, c'est votre vache," ("Yes, it's your cow,") when the teacher pointed it out. (You know, if she had only asked for it to be returned right then...) He managed, with some help, to get it in the yearbook as well. Also, got it a student ID.

There's also the fun discovery that ice skating rinks just dump out Zamboni shavings behind the rink after resurfacing, and they'll be completely confused if you start playing around in them. This is how he and his friends celebrated high school graduation - having a snowball fight. On the first day of summer. In South Florida.

Back in high school, this troper would often get hungry during classes, but bringing food into class was obviously forbidden. Her senior year, she finally figured out that Refuge In Audacity was the solution. Teachers get pissed when you bring candy or chips to class; teachers ''cannot react'' when you pull a baked potato or a cold pork chop out of your purse.

I did something similar once. I brought my little sister's easy bake oven and during the short time the teacher was out of the class I baked myself a pie

This troper has gotten away with a groin assault right in front of the principal and an office full of staff, and helped win a game of Capture The Flag by running onto enemy field screaming that she was a distraction. Also, a friend of hers walks around regularly in a cape and dog ears, and curses flagrantly at formal events.

This troper volunteered to be part of a demonstration in his Psychology class. He was told simply to stand inside an invisible box whose dimensions had been marked out on the floor. Finding just standing there inside the box boring, he started pacing back and forth in an exaggerated marching step. This got a laugh. He started moonwalking. This got a bigger laugh. He followed this up with doing the Worm on the floor, log rolls from side to side, and the Silly Walk, in that order. While all this was going on, the students were cracking up, the three other volunteers in the box with me were just standing there and staring, and the poor teacher couldn't keep her composure. I soon found out that what she had predicted would happen was that the volunteers would just stand there awkwardly and try not to stand out. She wasn't quite prepared for a CrazyAwesome improv performer with no sense of shame to volunteer, evidently.

This Troper fondly recalls his run as a student council member, with everything i did that related to student council being refuge in audacity. For starters, when people made their "Elect me!" speeches infront of the whole school, I merely set up a dance with 3 friends and won. When the school council discussed energy drinks in school being banned, I managed to get the motion overturned by leaving signed, empty cans all around the school ''including the staffroom''. And when the time came to choose a new headmaster (we didn't have much power, but at least they listened) I gave a TheReasonYouSuck speech to the former vice-head, complete with powerpoint presentation. I didn't even get reprimanded once, and the vice head didn't get chosen.

This troper's friend once flipped off a teacher to his face in high school. Not only did said friend avoid any punishment for his action, the teacher-who taught Civics and US Government-said that it was perfectly within friend's first amendment "Free Speech" rights to do so, and used him as an example in his lectures from then on.

This troper pulled this off several times as a kid. When he was in first grade, his class had to do a research project. He wanted to do one on dinosaurs, but that got an executive veto from his teacher. He then asked her if he could do one on time periods and got approval...and all of his time periods happened to be prehistoric ones(such as Jurassic, Cretaceous, etc.) You can see where this went. He got a 100% on the project, and no consequences for flagrantly violating the rules established by his teacher. In this case, teacher thought he meant historical time periods, as in, the Middle Ages and things like that.

Another great example, this time from one of his friend's experiences, occurred in 7th grade science. We had a quiz on the Periodic Table of the Elements. His friend did not study, and eventually just started making up his own elements to fit the chemical symbols, like writing that 'K'(Potassium) stood for Kingston(as in the capital of Jamaica). He went so far BeyondTheImpossible that the teacher just gave him partial cred for the humor value of his responses.

This Troper got away with some pretty crazy stuff in her science class, such as the time she did no work in the lesson, just wrote the date and title "Reproduction" then filled the page full of pictures of adorable rabbits. the teacher commented on it

Teacher: Stop drawing in your book and do the work

Troper: you not like my bunniez? you are so bunny-ist

Teacher: Maybe so, now do the work or I will move you to the front of the class

She actually did nothing after that and didnt respond to any more of my drawings

My high school math teacher got away with this if only because he'd been a teacher for so long he legally can't be fired. Damn teacher's union...

Having to buy an enema kit for an elderly relative is embarrassing. Throw a box of condoms, sleeping pills, a bottle of calamine lotion, and a squeaky steak into your basket too? The look on the clerk's face will be priceless.

This troper did this when he was really little, reading The ABC Book (A classic DrSeuss book). It started normal, but eventually got random and silly toward the end with stuff like "Q is for butt", which normally, I would get in trouble for saying that, but everybody was too busy cracking up to care.

I once went into a Home Depot to purchase a ceiling fan. My mind was on other things, so I grabbed the fan and walked out of the store, and I was halfway to my car before I realized I hadn't paid for it. I walked back in and explained what had happened to the nearest cashier. His only response was, "Yeah, I saw you take it but I figured they didn't pay me enough to chase after a 6-foot-tall man stealing a ceiling fan.

This troper has often taken refuge.

He once had to write a paper in a class on ancient Greek literature, specifically on an argument in one of the works. The maximum length for the argument was two pages. Lacking both experience and interest in literary analysis, the troper chose a 10 page argument for the 10 page paper. The opening paragraph of the paper was, essentially, "Yes, I know I was supposed to choose a two page argument, but I couldn't write that much on that little. So I chose this argument instead". The professor's response was, "You're supposed to follow the outlines given." And the troper got a B.

Likewise, the troper pulled several in his career as a middle school teacher.

The first day of class, he demonstrated that heat rises... by pouring ethanol on a student's desk and lighting it on fire. The desk was unharmed and only just uncomfortably warm when the fire went out. Middle school students love fire. (Yes, this was for a science class).

Later in the year, the intent was to just wow the kids, so the troper lit a window on fire. Again, with ethanol. The window cracked. He did not get into trouble.

And at the end of the year, when the alternative was to start a project (in a different class) with no time left to finish it, the troper took the kids outside to play kickball.

The best would have to come from earlier in the troper's educational career. He disliked a teacher so much that he turned his desk around and refused to have anything to do with her. This was in the third grade.

I always seem to invoke this trope anytime teachers give me an assignment. If I have even a slight bit of leeway into creativity, I just barge right into it, not caring how many points I lose. This trope fueled me passing creative writing with stories involving the NSA tapping a random call that happened to be Freya (for an assignment about driving) and a final Exam using two different stories (one poem, one short story) concerning both vomit and love. I ignored all factual basis in a Journalism class, and instead wrote things like a damning story about the Rubiks Cube creator being a Nazi and a news report about a shooting done in the style of every single cop trope I could think of. I started off my first year of college with a media literacy class where we had to create a two page advertisement for a fake business in Word. I coloured the page red, stuck in some images of bears and other Russian stereotypes, and wrote out how my business would teach you to speak perfect Russian. But that wasn't quite obtuse enough. So I wrote it in Russian. No other time has a teacher ever given me a good grade for something mostly unreadable, and whose very ''title'' was a dick joke.

In this troper's ICT class, we had to produce a music video for any song we wanted. One of this troper's classmates basically did nothing for the entire five-week period. Instead of rushing in the last week to make a mediocre video, they decided to make a video of themselves, sticking their heads out of the drama room's curtains and pretending to sing opera. Set to ''Nessun Dorma''. The teacher laughed so hard he couldn't grade it properly, and said, "If you're going to make something bad, make it '''really bad'''."

This Troper has a rather irritating friend who makes a habit of trying to steal her things, especially after gym class (since it's the only one we have together). Once, he grabbed her gym shorts and ran into the boy's bathroom, where this (female) troper couldn't follow. He came out a few seconds later, this troper wrestled the gym shorts away from him, and smacked him over the head none-too-gently (there was a pretty audible thump.) This all happened in full view of a teacher who, after the friend whined to her about it, laughed and said he deserved it. This troper saluted her for that.

This Troper's mother decided to put an end to bickering over the front seat between her brother and herself by insisting that "Shotgun" be called before every trip. Said brother immediately called shotgun. Said Troper sat down in the front seat. When her brother yelled "I called shotgun," this Troper replied "And I ignored you." Her mother laughed and warned her it would only work once.

This troper has gone most of his AP Government and Politics seminars completely quiet and bored. It being the end of the year and with nearly nothing to lose he's taken RefugeInAudacity and most recently called the US Military pansies (Bonus points because the teacher was in the Navy.) while holding up a picture of a predator drone, (comically subtitled "Bad Robot") then explained that if we really want to assassinate terrorists we should be hiring handsome gentlemen with guns and proceeded to hold up a picture of Pierce Brosnan in "The Matador." The only downside is that this was all planned days in advance was originally going to be a lot longer.

This troper's classmate wrote an English essay (English being a foreign language) about how fashion is actually a conspiracy by feminists and homosexuals to brainwash people and how the only solution would be a second Hitler. He also wrote it in fluent English and received maximum points for it.

This troper has narrowly avoided several well-deserved kicks to the balls by saying "I don't believe you can hit a target that small" when threatened.

This troper once had to write an essay for his Civics class based on the executive branch of government. However, he instead wrote a ten page sci-fi political epic remotely based on the 2004 presidential elections. It was set in a cyber-punk version of America rife with robots posing as candidates, manipulating ballots, and orchestrating a mass assassination conspiracy. Suffice to say it was awesome, albeit irrelevant to the actual topic. However he did receive a good grade.

This troper had a fantastic English teacher this year who thought she was amazing. (Switching to first person here.) As a result, I could get away with a lot of stuff that I couldn't do otherwise. Two examples include: A) Submitting a short story that was essentially three pages of Cluster F Bomb, and B) At the end of the year, submitting an ad for vodka and writing under it, "What I Need After This Year."

This troper has a friend who named his character in one of the {{Pokemon}} games "MichaelVick."

That can't be true. The names of Pokemon characters can only contain 7 letters/symbols(and 10 for Pokemon), so unless he used "M.Vick" or something, and had a non-hacked game, he couldn't have done that.

Although hats and all headwear are banned in This Troper's school, I got away with wearing a neon yellow book cover on my head all day for the last day of school, simply because it was so weird that nobody questioned it. It helps, of course, that I (proudly) had a reputation for being weird already. My response, when asked why I was wearing it, was, "Nobody told me I couldn't."

This troper accidentally skipped school when she thought class was over. The funny thing is, she went to the school library to pick up her bag beforehand, and just WALKED OUT OF SCHOOL. No one seemed to notice and after this troper realised she still has class (about 20 minutes later) she rushed back, burst in her french class, and flat-out told her teacher "I accidentally thought school was over" and sat down in her seat. The teacher did nothing about it.

This tropers life is full of them: a high school that lets us get away with alot of crazy antics like racing rolling chairs in the hall, the F-bomb carved into a sidewalk and no one filling it in,alot of times she likes to wear fashionable outfits that make her classmates clothing look generic in comparson, but its this tropers best friend takes the cake wearing a pair of paint splattred print skinny pants paired with a pair of patchworked pattern, knee-high converses.

It was the last year of high school for me (2003). I was assigned to write an essay on the movie, ''{{Casablanca}}'' for a Film Critiquing class. The problem was, back in high school, I was notorious in some classes for not having my work in on time, so I made a bet with the teacher: if I turn in my essay on time, he has to apologize to me in front of the class. If I didn't, then I owed him a dance at the senior prom (this happened around that time). When I realized that I would never get the paper to him on time, I came up to him and admitted defeat. The joke was on him, though; I sort of know how to dirty dance and was wearing a long, silk scarf with my prom dress, so any attempts at him leaving the dance floor were met with my roping him in in the same way the Bo Peep figurine yanks Woody back with her shepherd's crook in ''ToyStory''. I figured that if I was going to be humiliated at my prom, then I should return the favor. Besides, who was ever going to believe that a shy, quiet girl like me knew how to work it on the dance floor and act like a man-eater (even if it was for a few minutes)? Who, I ask you, who? Another dance floor escapade into audacity happened later when a girl kept begging me to dance. I didn't feel like it, so I tried to back out of it. She ended up dragging me to the dance floor; I ended up working her like a stripper pole and licking her face (I'm not gay, BTW). I guess the moral of these two stories is: "Bad things happen when people pressure me on the dance floor. If you have a brain in your head, either don't do it or just ask nicely and back off when I say, 'No.'"

To add to my repertoire of RefugeInAudacity, I pride myself in being the only person I know who uses unflappable kindness as a weapon. Sometimes, it works, and sometimes it doesn't, but it is a RefugeInAudacity solely for the fact that it's a far cry from using physical violence and verbal insults to "solve" problems.

This Troper was a class chew toy, and everybody knew it. After a while, I tell this five foot guy (I was 5'8") that I could kick him in the face if I wanted to. So I did. Well, I ''would'' have, had he not scrambled up the science table at the last second. This was enough to net me a high five from the teacher.

I was playing Hide-and-Seek Tag with my cousins, and after a while I got tired. So next time I have to hide, I just sit there in plain sight. The clincher? My cousin laughs at me, and proceeds to look for everyone else, leaving me untagged. She's not sure why she did this.

This troper's math teacher in high school was quite strict. He was known to snap at students for trivial things like swinging their legs under their desks. So if you forgot to bring your books you'd be in trouble, right? Well, when that happened to this troper (and it happened a few times) she'd just take out a sheet or two of paper and draw until the class is over. The teacher never said anything, even though this troper was seated in the front row!

In an English lesson, this troper's class was given a paragraph from a ''Famous Five'' book, then told to continue it with another paragraph. This troper's version had the titular group accidentally setting off a Blue Peacock. Other students' writing include one of the Five turning out to be a serial killer, Timmy (the dog) turning out to have superpowers, and Timmy peeing on the villain's corpse. The class average was 85%. The guy who wrote the last one got several points taken off for "being disrespectful to dead people".

This troper has also flipped off a former Vice President. In a military funeral. With the guy being surrounded by armed guards. From 20 feet away. From what he saw, the guy was too busy eating cookies to notice.

This troper once beat up several muscular gangsters with a chair in front of other gang members, and got away alive. %%This example was written by the above troper. If you actually believed it, then it's just this trope at work.

Where to begin for This Troper...

On the official {{Bionicle}} forums, in a thread about what I would do if {{BigBad Makuta}} came to my house, I said: I'd get his autograph, then invite him in for a cup of tea and a slice of cake.

I have also been GettingCrapPastTheRadar in my English assessments by making it so ridiculously overblown that the crap is mistaken for melted chocolate.

My old school had a 2 mile run for sport relief that was compulsory. He's the kicker; it was a fancy dress run, Which we could use anything we wanted so i turned up with my BIKE. I only got challenged once!

While in high school (like most others on this page), this male troper was put into a group with two girls and another guy. At the time I had a reputation for being friendly, occassionally witty, but mostly shy. The teacher wasn't the most effective task-master, so everyone started chatting rather than working. The two girls in the group began to talk about the quality of their bras. One of the girls, who the troper had known since grade school, complained that her bra wasn't supportive enough and thought it made her mammory appendages look funny. With a completely straight face I said, "Your breasts look fine." The girl laughed so hard she fell out of her chair.

For a college freshman "how to get through college" class, in which we had one of the most incompetent teachers I'd ever had in my educational career, the final exam essay was "What did you learn from this class?" This troper went on a 2-page written rant about how the class had taught him absolutely nothing, and was a waste of his tuition money and time that he could be using towards classes in his major. Not only did he get an A, but an admission from the teacher that that class was only in the curriculum because the state required it for accreditation. There was also one professor who I had for several sociology, psychology, and poly-sci classes with whom our back-and-forth could be considered this (we once spent half a class period trading insults, most seeming fairly personal and sometimes with not-school-appropriate-language, to general amazement from the rest of the class.)

Unrelated, but from the same troper: I took 3 years of high school French, due to an "advanced diploma" being awarded for 3 years of a foreign language in his school system. My entire stint in that class could be considered this trope. During the oral dialogue, once the technical requirements were out of the way, I would write up some truly insane things to say in French, in front of the class. These include:

An entire Celebrity Jeopardy skit, done SNL style, complete with foul-mouthed Sean Connery calling Alex Trebek's mother a whore and referencing "The Penis Mightier" (which, admittedly, didn't survive translation)

When the assignment was "Vacation destinations and what you want to do there" my answer was "I am going to the underwater city of Atlantis, where I will go fishing for squirrels and visit the whore houses"

Various skits ending with one character revealing himself to be "Bladvak, the Alien" and zapping the other partner with a ray gun.

References to getting hit by feces thrown by a monkey when describing a trip to the zoo.

And for all of these examples, I got full marks because I had perfect pronunciation and grammar in the language.

This troper knows a guy who actually hooked up with a Type 2 HollywoodNerd after this exchange: #QUOTE#'''Girl:''' I stopped watching ''PowerRangers'' when I was eight. Gotta love the ''Ninja Storm'' Megazord, though, they're so strong, and humongous, and... #QUOTE#'''Guy:''' I can show you something really strong and humongous.

This troper's father found refuge here one day responding to a hold up at a Chinese Food Restaurant in Australia. He walked in nonchalantly, clearly in uniform and asked the gunman if he wanted anything from the drinks refrigerator while they waited for the negotiator. Stunned at the sheer audacity of it, asked for a can of coke. My father then started gently shaking the can of coke before handing it to the gunman. The resulting eruption of agitated fizzy-drink was distraction enough for my father and the owner of the restaurant to disarm the gunman and take him into custody.

When I was eight and walking home alone from school, several middle-schoolers stopped me and asked for my green card. Not knowing the douches were simply being racist pricks (I didn't know what green cards were back then), I sort of blanked out and elbowed the leader as hard as I could in the gut. Though I was freaking out considerably, I managed to remain outwardly calm and simply walk away despite the fact I was sure they'd all jump me. They let me go, though the guy I hit howled at me that I was a "fucking Chinese bitch". And I couldn't help but to scream back that I was Korean. And they still didn't jump me.

This troppette stood on a desk to prove a point that she was the teacher's favourite back in year 8. Didn't get in trouble for it at all, and now it's like a reference point for all my friends. (like the tropers above, I come off as a cute little innocent would-never-do-anything-wrong girl in the majority of school, I give good first impressions and my face is innocent looking and attractive.)

This troper likes playing DukeNukem3D during class, with no attempt to hide it. And for the hell of it, he plays Red Light District a lot.

This troper pulled this in computer science class. Being the nerd I am, it was rather boring, so I was chatting. Due to a bug in the client, I had to close the window before a new message arrived, or else it would crash. Some time, the teacher walked up to me, checking for what I did. Just in that moment the chat window popped up again, showing a rather long history and the newest message telling me that Illusion of Time was an SNES game. My reaction? I answered and the window closed again. The teacher's reaction? *nod* Mhm.

To be fair, aforesaid troper pretty much had a RefugeInAudacity pass with this teacher, being one of two people in the class who actually managed to program stuff.

This troper can get away with alot in his school because he's a quiet kid who most of the time finishes his work. Some examples include saying f-ck in front of my 6th grade assistant teacher, righting "I have no idea how to do this question but hey atleast I'm honest" on a math test and surfing tv tropes in the middle of social class

Back in the mists of time, when this troper was in 7th grade, he completely forgot to do a report that was to be presented in front of the class--so when he was called up, he BS'd for a few minutes, then sat down again. Though every other student could tell that this troper had not done the assignment, the teacher praised him for "not even using notes."

In this troper's 8th grade, our math teacher had a pretty big ego, soon came the math test, and the last question was a Pythagoras theorem one. Which teacher, the aforementioned math teacher, or his arch-nemesis, the science teacher, would win in a race; if the math teacher went at something-Km/h, through the hypotenuse, and the science teacher went through the legs at something-else-km/h . I ended up getting it wrong by messing up the square-rooting, but several other students just put "I have no clue about how, but there is now way that *math teacher* is letting *science teacher* win in a question he designed". They all got half a mark.

While at a get together at her home, I was discussing Thanksgiving plans with some other students and one of our professors. I mentioned that I would not be returning "home" 12 hours and another state away that time, and would probably be spending the holiday alone in the dorm, unless she wanted to invite me to spend it with her. Despite my protests that I was kidding about the last part, she invited me to go with her family on the spot, and on her day off, took me about a good 2+ hours away to do so. I got to spend Thanksgiving in a real home, with a family far larger and more peaceful than mine had been in a long time. RefugeInAudacity indeed.

The school I used to go when I was in elementary age, had sections of kindergarden, elementary, middle and high school. Anyways, my sister was in kindergarden age at that time and once she saw one kid teasing me, so she went over and spat on his face. He went to the principal to tell on her, but she refused to believe a kinder-aged little girl would do such a thing.

I was at one of my last Debate tournaments before I quit and my opponent was being really stupid, trying to twist words I never said, not doing her research, etc. So I'm so fed up with her that during one of her speeches I slam my hands down on the desk I was at stand up and Yell "OBJECTION" before sitting back down, my opponent was so stunned she stopped talking, and I got blank stares from the judges till one said "Objection noted". I ended up winning 2 to 1.

One of my old teachers is known for cussing quite frequently in her classes...classes of 8 year olds.

This troper had a Spanish teacher in high school who decided to start giving daily vocabulary quizzes on three or four words to make sure we were keeping up with our studying. Of course, nobody was, and cheating ensued. Notecards with the words on them got stuck in the backs of chairs, in the front of notebooks on the floor, and in people's laps. The teacher eventually caught on, and told the class that if she caught someone else cheating, she was going to stop giving us the quizzes. So one guy got out a pencil, and started writing the words for that day's quiz on his desk. When the teacher came over and asked what he was doing, he calmly said, "I'm cheating." Not only did he not get in trouble, but we didn't have to take those quizzes anymore.

I (@/WanderlustWarrior) regularly pick people with jobs that are treated as being incredibly serious, just to get them to crack up laughing in public places. This includes: getting the police (that ''can'' move) at Buckingham Palace to pose and say "cheese" while I take a video, while he was eating. Alternatively, getting through customs, when asked if my bag has any sharp objects in it, by replying "just my sense of style".

Our teacher told us that some years ago, one of the students in a class had to write an essay about something that's brave, and he/she just wrote "This is brave". Another student wrote an erotic story. They both got 6's(our equilvalent of A).

Also, the teachers have a rule that you can't go on non-schoolwork webpages in class, and they watch over our screens. However, they don't seem to care much(well, unless you're on ({Facebook}}.)

Once when playing the card game BS, I claimed to have six aces when I had none (we had two decks in play). I figured my lie was so big no reasonable person would call me out, especially because the pile of cards was getting high. Unfortunately for me, not everyone playing was reasonable.

My life has been filled with these wonderful moments. It all started in elementary school...

In the 3rd grade some older kids were picking on my friends on the playground. So I go Hulk on them, in front of almost every teacher in the school and I fully expected serious repercussions...that never came. Apparently if your situation was understandable or appealed to the teachers, then you could do almost anything... Twas quite the revelation for me.

That same year I did this on two more noteworthy occasions: Someone had scored higher than me on a test (I had a reputation for getting 100% on every assignment, so the day I get a 99%...) the kid starts dancing around rubbing it in while the class sat on the floor by him. The substitute teacher I had loved me (platonic) so, with her standing right by us, I just stick my leg out and waited. Cue him moonwalking straight over my leg and falling flat on his face. "Oh, Mrs. H, there was no way I could've known he'd dance on to me". The kid was pissed, but everybody else got a verrrry nice laugh out of it. Next one was when I was running for student council. Initially we had to give a speech to the class that said why we deserved to be elected, followed by questions. Well, one person was in a prime position to beat me. Fortunately it was a minor running gag that this kids pants were always falling. So, in the questioning afterwards (he being very confident and cool) decided to accept my question... "Why should we elect you if you can't even keep your pants up?" (In a room of third graders this was high-class wit). In short I got elected to student council (then treasurer) by screwing the notecards halfway through and just winging it.

Throughout middle and highschool now I've been keeping things kosher. I don't need the attention. It's nothing too flashy usually... Wrote/Turned in an entire essay the class it was due by screwing facts and turning it into an Assassin's Creed II review. Win a debate by shouting "giant beaver" about ten times a minute. When I don't know an answer I write "Jesus", because our nice Christian teachers won't mark that one wrong ;-). "L, why didn't you do your homework?" "Would you believe that my sister ate it?" "No, you only have one sibling. E, your older brother." "I know". Or actually doing all of the assignment while making all of your answers relate back to how much this wont help you, then having the teachers be ethically forced to give you 100% for bashing their workload/ course.

This entry is incredibly long, and I thank those for reading it. Make no mistake though, there are doznes more where those came from. It's safe to say, this is one of my favorite tropes to incur. I hope I've inspired a fairly intelligent successor.

And yes, that last bit is supposed to sound blatantly arrogant...

This troper knows a friend that housesat for another buddy of his in the mountains of Virginia over last year's (2010) Thanksgiving break. At one point in the week, a fully-grown bear happened upon the property. At midnight. What does this troper's friend do? Charges the bear with a flashlight and a ''sword.'' He re-enacts Civil War and Medieval battles as a hobby, but don't ask me where he got the sword. In any case, the bear ran off.

I used to know someone who, when faced with an essay question they didn't know the answer to, responded by briefly summarizing the plot of the original StarWars trilogy, then using the remaining space to draw some of the characters.

In high school (and college) I had some of the most anti-cell-phone teachers in the entire world. Naturally, I was able to use my phone without consequences by sitting in the front row, taking out my cell phone, and texting like I would anywhere else. The kids who got caught were the ones who tried to do it all sneaky-like in the back of the class, under their desks.

Personally, despite my attempts, I usually fail at taking RefugeInAudacity. While many others that I know are able to make insults so hilariously offensive, I always manage to be offensive enough to actually be offensive. It must be my normally "flat" way of speaking.

Even though this may not nearly be as awesome as most of the other examples, in my history homework, I have decided to hide a random easter egg about how the Enlightenment allowed elephants to become friends with dragons, to see if my teacher actually reads what I write in my work, since I find that I get higher marks than I deserve for some of my homework. Being constantly swamped with homework in that class, I started to get tired with answering each question oh-so-boringly. I'll try to remember to let you know how it works out when I get it back.

Update: He doesn't appear to have noticed. Perhaps I'll take that into consideration.

This Troper usually fails, but has gotten away with making bizarre statements in the middle of class. This is due to her friends, being one year ahead, already paved the way for crazy people. I call my Biology teacher Coach Banana King, I claim goblins and other mythical creatures *usually ninjas* steal people, and I once did a speech on how I would be stupid enough to stand in the way of a tornado. Sad thing is, people are used to it. I need to get new material before I'm completely ignored...

Keet This troper does this for laughs.

One time this guy I hate kept annoying me non stop during my grade 9 Science class. Normally I don't act like this but after a while I just snapped, so I grabbed his ruler and hit him over the head with it so hard the ruler broke. I was sitting ''directly'' in front of our teacher. He simply said "knowing both of you as I do, I am going to assume he deserved that," and I didn't get in any trouble at all. This actually seems to happen quite a lot in my school. Whilst I have never (or rarely) done it myself, there are a large number of people who get away with frequently being out of uniform, swearing in class, swearing ''at teachers'', casually wandering in to class very late with excuses along the lines of "I had better things to do that get here on time," walking out of class early with excuses along the lines of "I'm bored so I'm leaving," never attending detentions and not getting anything more than a lecture, not doing homework and admitting "I didn't do it because I didn't want to/it was stupid/I had better things to do, like get drunk," handing in assignments ''weeks'' overdue admitting that there was no good excuse for them being late and still not getting marked down or punished, when called upon to answer a question- admitting that they were ignoring a teacher and hadn't heard the question/had no intention of working, ''sleeping during class'', '''INFORMING a teacher that their subject was stupid and that they would be sleeping for the rest of the lesson''', blatantly eating/texting/even ''talking on the phone'' in class, using computers for anything other than work with teachers right behind them, convincing teachers to give up and let us screw around rather than work. And that's just the stuff that happens on a regular basis. With little or no repercussions. This may be because our teachers sometimes do the same things e.g. telling us that they haven't planned a lesson/marked an assignment because they couldn't be bothered, showed up late or let us leave early "just because," used computers for non-school related things, texted/ate/slept in class, given us ''way'' more help with assignments that is really allowed, sometimes to the point of ''practially spelling out answers DURING EXAMS'' and letting us hand things in late or not do some of the work at all if the teacher decided it was too stupid/hard. The best example of this was an incident with my grade 11 Drama teacher. She hadn't marked our drafts because she didn't want to waste her weekend doing school work. So she gave us an extension and asked us not to let the other class find out, because their teacher is her boss and she wasn't actually allowed to give us extra time when the other class didn't get it. Needless to say, the other class found out immediately, still had to hand in their assignments on the official due date when we didn't, but nothing happened anyway. She also agreed with us the assignment was "fucking retarded and pointless," told us exactly how to do it and actually ''wrote some of it for us.'' Needless to say, she was everyone's favourite teacher.

Another Drama related one was our final performance where one guy made no secret of the fact that he wasn't going to be putting much effort into learning his lines, despite constantly being told off by the teacher and the rest of the class. He ad-libbed quite a bit during the real performance, and was still learning his lines backstage while the play was going on. In one scene he needed to say his lines from offstage, so he just blatantly stood there, reading off his script where all of us and the teacher could see him. He still got an A+. I get the impression that if he'd been any less blatantly honest about not learning his lines, he wouldn't have gotten such a high mark.

This troper teaches English in China, and the penalty for speaking Chinese in class is to sing a song. The older and more jaded students don't want to do this. On one occasion I stood there saying "sing a song" over and over again for more than ten minutes, bringing the entire class to a standstill. When she finally did sing, it was the ABC's, except in China they can't say LMNOP all very quickly, so they just say LMN, OPQ, RST, UVW, XYZ.

Also, Chinese people hit each other (in my experience) than Americans, but when Americans hit each other, they're ''trying to leave a mark'', as it were. When the Chinese students slap each other I say, "What's wrong?" And they reply with "she hit-uh me!" And I say, "Hit her back." or "Hey stop fighting. If you want to fight, ''do it in the front of the room''."

I was once asked to organise the local Brownie pack's contribution to the Christmas Carol Concert at our local church. I turned up on the night, to conduct them through 'Always Look on the Bright Side of Life' from MontyPython. In a ''church''. We got a standing ovation from everyone but the vicar.

In this troper's school, using a cellphone during school hours is not allowed. I have a classmate who sits behind me, who happens to be class president and one of the smartest students in class, actively texts during class. He does this more times than everybody else. He sits in the second row and doesn't even try to hide it whenever the teacher is in front, and he got away with this all the freaking time.

In Year Nine, this troper's year all had to write a speech for English from a list of prescribed topics. They had to present them to their class, and the best would be presented in front of the year, after which a prize would be given to the best from each class. This troper, finding the topics boring, did 'Ten Things I Hate About My Best Friend'. Everyone loved it (I did give the friend a copy of the speech before I presented it, I was aiming for entertainment, not cruelty) and I presented it to the year. I got the prize for my class.

In Year Twelve, this troper had to do an English speech (it's complicated, but I was doing Year Twelve twice so I had to do the speech twice) and both times, I got pissed off and took the negative view to the question, something nobody else did. Upon deciding to take the negative view, I promptly threw formal speech to the wind and kicked arse. I didn't get a perfect score for either speech, but I'm still happy with what I did get.

This troper knows someone who insured some cigars for $2000. Then smoked them. Then tried to collect the insurance money. When the company refused to pay he sued them - and won! Subverted in that they arrested him for felony arson the moment he stepped outside.

This troper discovered that he could wear his costume to school on the day of trick-or-treating. The "no masks" rule remains in place, though - fortunately, the rule only mentions masks, leaving open the possibility of wearing a gigantic L-Block...

One from This troper and one from his mother:

This troper's mother was doing some course or other (this troper was a toddler at the time). One time, for one of the assignments she had, she told the tutor that she couldn't hand the work in as (and here I quote) "My son's drawn on it." Yes, I apparently actually did that.

It's a tradition for the upper sixth in my school to play pranks on the last day. This troper needs to find a teacher who wouldn't mind if one of their drawers is filled with, say, pasta or dried peas.

This Troper takes a Japanese class in which students spend a great deal of time crafting sentences using various sentence structures. To make things more interesting, this Troper writes things like "I have no money, so I will not buy a katana" and "Sasuke likes revenge more than candy".

This Brazilian Troper had already passed English one year at the time of the final test. So he saw fit to say the answers OUT LOUD in the final test for everyone else to hear. The teacher just laughed and asked him to stop, rather than, you know, sending him out.

When forced to go to what the school called the Junior Olympics back in 4th grade, where they force everyone to go to a track and run and sit around on a hot as hell day for seven hours, This Troper got out of it by punching some random kid in the face so I would get suspended and be sent home. It worked.

The final assembly at the end of the year for this tropers school was made of this. One of the boys dressed in drag, impersonating different teachers- and then dragged one on stage and did what could only be described as a pole dance around her. Two other boys were dancing, and one got so excited that he ripped his shirt off, making buttons explode across the room. Another boy (seeing a pattern?) pretended to act out a wrestling match with the smallest boy in the year- ''dressed in nothing but the neon green swimming costume from Borat''. All of this occurred in two hours of absolute insanity- this troper could barely breathe she was laughing so much throughout the entire thing.

The class test had as the essay question "Do you think advertisers have too much control over consumers?". Of course I based everything on how they opress people with their fashions while quoting Emperor Charles who, well, opresses people. I also think the teacher didn´t even know who I was quoting there.

I once did a report on a subject. Shortly before this we got some new pupils and one of them asked if I had copied it all from the internet because of my eloquent speech. Of course several passages were copied directly with little changes and I boldly stated "I am just so good".

I was with some friends near a few benches. Most of them stood but I sat on a bench and a female friend too. After some conversation she just put her hand on my knee as a joke while making puns. I took the cake when I pointed at my crotch and said "It´s that way". And nobody brought it up since then.

This troper has did this on several occasions:

He attented once in a church camp. There he was asked what church meant to him. He replied: "I see my future in church. When I grow up, I want to be a priest, like Frollo, so I can lock some ugly kid into the bell tower of our church. Unfortunately I haven't found proper ugly kid on eBay yet."

He once complained to his english teacher about the amount of essays where you can choose your subject freely, since he's having hard time coming up with ducent subjects. During the very next class the teacher announced another one of those essays. The solution? The troper wrote an speculative essay about whether or not cannibalism could cure both world hunger and overpopulation. The text basically ''engouraged'' to cannibalism, and was very offensive, for example it proposed 'eating the ugly, fat, annoying and unpopular people first as it would rise the life quality of others'. The best part? ''The troper got 100% Score.''

In 8th grade, we got a sheet with a bunch of tasks, where one was "insert this verb/adjective in the right form". With sentences like "When the whale exploded, blood and guts flew everywhere".