ThisTroper once... sigh... tried to put on a pair of trousers without realising that there was a clothes-hanger inside them in a fairly unfortunate position to say the least. It hit me in the nuts is what I'm saying. Fun times. At the very least, not many people can claim that's happened to them I'd guess, not that anyone would want to be able to claim that.

You may know that in Spanish, 'años' means 'years'. Note the little squiggly thing over the 'n' that makes it into "an-yos" rather than "an-os". It's an important distinction as I found out when I handed in a Spanish essay claiming that I was "16 anus old".

I personally think that in SpeedGrapher, Kagura should have hated her mom due to how abusice and dyspassonate she was. She shouldn't have tried to protect her from Suitengu's plot to marry her. And her death should have pleased her instead of shattering her. The way she reacted to her death is the total opposite of the way she should have reacted to it, and she should have been more than willing to leave her to the wolves.

In high school my class had a special test. Some dudes stole the answer sheet with all the correct answers to the test on it and passed to the rest of the class. The school authorities found out. We all had to redo exam.

'''You'd expect''': Them to replace the questions of the previous test with new ones.

'''Instead''': It was the same test,same questions. At this point, everyone already knew the answers to the questions so no one had a hard time doing it. For some things there's just no excuse.~Tropers/NTroper

ThisTroper attended school with a guy who believed that dogs and cats were the males and females of the same species. WhatAnIdiot.

Seen on a French newspaper: in the week leading to Christmas 2010, three guys attacked a shop, beat up its occupants and left with the cash. Two hours later, all three were easily caught by the police. What went wrong with their "perfect" plan? Guys, regardless of the crime you just committed, walking straight from the shop to your hideout is wrong. Especially if the ground is covered with a thick layer of snow in which you'll leave deep footprints.

Sometime way back when I was a kid and had those shoes with wheels in them, I was skating around in a gamestop when i rolled ''right into the glass door face first'' and knocked down and fell over a customer that was coming in. After I got up,''I did the exact same thing going back in'', only this time I fell on a small child. The sad part is, even today at 15 years old, he would probably end up somehow doing it again.

A couple of years ago, I went to see Jones}} the new Indiana Jones film in the cinema with my friends. On coming out after the film had finished and discussing the strange ending, one friend became confused. It turned out that she had had no idea throughout the film who Indiana Jones was and believed he was the female character. And I quote: 'I thought Indiana Jones was a woman.' Group facepalm

Not even a minute ago I went into my kitchen. The door we mainly use is there. It is 3:29 AM. My parents are asleep and being the brilliant people they are, they left the door open (there's two doors in that doorway, they left the one that isn't mainly window and unable to lock open) with THE FUCKING KEYS IN IT! Thank god I caught that idiocy or who knows what could have happened.

Same troper, just adding the fact that they've done this before. Many times, but not with the keys in the door normally.

My brother did this about a month ago, my parents noticed it and locked it

This normally very intelligent troper was seduced by his now ex-girlfriend (who was Caucasian, but with very vague Asian features) whom was after him who claimed to be Eurasian via a Chinese father. (she turned out to be quarter-Chinese in truth, the rest was white Australian.)\\ '''You'd expect''': He wouldn't believe her and would report her attempts at seduction to the staff at the halfway house she and him were living in at the time.\\ '''Instead''': He let his lusts and then-held belief in {{Sex As Rite Of Passage}} get ahead of him, leading to {{Smoking Hot Sex}} (the girl was the smoker, not the troper - this troper still does not smoke).\\ '''It Gets Worse''': The girl in question, may look like a cute 19-year old young woman, but is {{Older Than They Look}}, an ex-junkie and an ex-hooker, and a JohnnyCash fan, Disservice}} which all Jerker}} add up to one thing...for those who don't like the Comfort Fic}} past-hurt present-comfort thing, use the {{Brain Bleach}} provided with the door to your right.\\ '''Finally''': This troper would like to express his sincerest regrets in the above actions, especially considering it was two-timing on someone he actually came to care about later on - however, due to her Bible-bashing (or Bible-thumping) religious beliefs being very much in accordance with her actions, she blamed DemonicPossession (basically AliensMadeThemDoIt without the extraterrestrials). If there was a DethroningMomentOfSuck page for TroperTales, this troper would put this here as well. Perhaps Anakin Skywalker should have talked to me before going after Padme Amidala (except that the roles were slightly and inexplicably reversed in that case and said first-time experience may have looked the Padme but was more personality-wise the Palpatine)...\\ '''Besides''': The relationship (such as it was) was based primarily on FoeYay.

This Troper, while at school, had a reasonably bright friend who, in ONE WEEK, burned holes in his T-shirt with an induction coil in Physics, blew the lights in a whole block by putting a paperclip in two holes of a powerpoint in English, and decided to sit on a second-floor air conditioner outside a window in Maths. For additional stupidity, the rest of the Maths class (but not this Troper) decided that the best option was to hold the window shut, forcing him to go via an occupied classroom.

How do you stick a paperclip into a computer program?

Very carefully

It's the Australian term for an electrical socket, guys.

This troper's brother once decided to ''stick his nose in a bottle of vinegar''. Even though he'd been through high school science classes. He claims to not remember the event.

Of course, it eventually became an amusing case of hypocrisy, as the troper herself wound up doing the same thing... ''out of curiosity''. ''She had been in high school science classes herself''. My only words: NEVER AGAIN!

While reading a textbook and doing homework (AP homework no less) this troper misread the word "seesawed" as "Sees(rhymes with fleece)-a-wed." Also, one of her friends asked "what color's the reddish brown one?" and thought that woodchucks were mythical creatures...

Actually there's been something that thiss troper has meant to say but just couldn't. Well, here it is: Although not a self inflicted What An Idiot moment, this troper has been ASTOUNDED at the amount of times someone has misspelt a fictional character's name, when it is quite CLEARLY spelt on screen. Sure, you can get away with Shao Kahn/Khan thanks to RougeAnglesOfSatin, but jeez, who the heck can misspell Shermie as "Saermie"? Or Ocelot as "Ozelot"? Jeez, man.

Well they might be from a culture other than your own, that ozelot thing, for example, sounds german. This troper routinely doesn't know if a he should use an S or a Z in z-sounding places. (thank god for Spell-checker though)

No way, the German "z" is pronounced somewhat like a "ts". But yeah, it's be pretty likely for German people to use C instead of a K/S/Z/anything else because it looks foreign, so yeah.

This other troper wants to give a special shoutout to Pokemon fans who should ''really'' know better. Particular spelling offenders include Treecko as "Treeko," Gastly as "Ghastly," and Onix as "Onyx." Did they even play the game?

BigNameFan Dragonfree compiled a list of common Pokémon name misspellings, and a reference for all Pokémon names.

This troper fairly frequently gets people misspelling her name in email replies. To her email address. Which is her name. Some people apparently just can't read.

There is this GameFaqs user, she is a fans of this one game and ''absolutley'' hates the main heroine, simply because she thinks that the said heroine is ugly and there is another character that has a YamatoNadeshiko personality and a greater design, so she bashes the heroine everytime to the point she even said that "****** is sucks because she has a very ugly design! Me? I'll use XXXXXX because she is cuter!" yeah, she is that dumb, oh and by the way this happened before the game is ''still in development''.

Ironically after the game is released it turns out the heroine is a very good character both in story and gameplay, in the other hand the other girl XXXXXX turns out to be very suck either way and a Scrappy for most player, well ever since the release date of the game...she was never seen again on the board, nice way to save your ass.

This troper has managed to walk right into a door, thinking it was a push instead of a pull, not once, not twice, not even three times, but at least a ''dozen'' times. At ''least''.

Compare walking right into a door because you ''forgot that you had to open it before walking through''. Twice in the same day, and then a few times later on too.

Compare running to a door that is about to close soon, reaching for the handle to grab it... Then realizing you reached for the WRONG SIDE OF THE DOOR. YES MY FINGERS DID GET CAUGHT IN THE DOOR FRAME AND YES IT DID HURT LIKE HELL.

That's nothing, this troper ran into a ''swing door''. Yes, a door you can push and pull.

In eighth grade, a normal, boring algebra class for this troper took a turn for the 'what the f--?!' when one of this troper's classmates glued two of his ''fingers'' together! He had asked one of this troper's other classmates for the glue to do it.

'''You'd expect''': For the the other classmate to tell him no.

'''However''': She ''gave'' the glue to him.

A guy in my math class cut his arm with siccsors. He was trying to cut his arm hair off he was 13.

This troper's sister noticed one of those fake banner ads that disguise themselves as Windows banners and told me, because of ONE AD, that I'm automatically not allowed on any websites that have those. I'm sorry, but there are several things incredibly wrong with that statement. for one, they are so freaking common that it'd be next to impossible to not find a website that has one. Two, you'd have to be dumb as a brick to be tricked into clicking it due to how obvious the scam is to smart users, and it doesn't unload the viruses until you've actually clicked it. THREE, there have been several websites that had the banner ad that caused no ill effects on said computer, making her argument incredibly egregious. She's treating it like she found me chatting with terrorists!

Or just download AdBlock?

This troper face palmed several times in his level 300 English class at college when another student, who was a grown man by the way, assumed that our assignment, which was to take an editor's analysis of a piece of literature and put it in our own words, would be plagiarizing the editor's work. He was clearly confused and/or misinformed about what exactly plagiarism meant, but he believed that rewording someone's work and citing it was stealing the work just because we weren't asked by the professor to use our own ideas. Even after the professor and two other students tried to explain to the man what exactly we had to do and how it was NOT plagiarism, he still thought it was.

Did you cite your sources? If you didn't, then it IS plagiarism.

S/He DID cite it. Read through it more carefully.

This troper, at a mall, was confronted by a man who claimed to be a Christian (like said troper), who asked him to lend him $40 for a hotel room. The man persistently persuades him, telling him that "it's okay, I'm a Christian," and that he doesn't need to call his mom about it.\\ '''You'd expect:''' This troper to realize, "why am I lending money to a stranger?", see through his coercions, lie about being broke, and walk away.\\ '''Instead:''' He forks over the $40, which was half of the $80 his mom had given him that day to buy stuff. (The other half had already gone into buying ''Planet Puzzle League''.) He also gives the man his number...without asking for the man's. To this day, this moment remains a serious DethroningMomentOfSuck that makes this troper hate himself at times.

Today, this troper went to a section of his calculus class that preceded his section, so as to allocate time to study for a midterm later that day. He also had homework due. \\ '''You'd expect:''' Him to simply mark on his homework that he's from the succeeding section, turn in his homework, and go. \\ '''Instead:''' He asks the professor while she's in the middle of lecturing, and when class ends, she ''yells at him for his rudeness''. He tries to apologize, but is scolded some more and told to not come to class if he's "gonna behave like that." To this troper, he might as well have punched his professor in the face, as it would've yielded the same effect. \\ '''ItGetsWorse:''' He was unable to focus on studying for his midterm the whole time, feeling like complete shit. Now he doesn't want to go to the next class meeting. Or go to class ever again.

Some time ago, the ShootEmUp ''Border Down'' got released on the then-comatose Dreamcast. This troper wanted it, but didn't feel like it because he stopped using his Dreamcast. \\ '''You'd expect:''' For me to buy it at release anyway, since after all I'm a shmup fanatic and I could use it just in case I decided to revive my Dreamcast. \\ '''Instead:''' I didn't bother, and now it's down%22+ %2Bdreamcast at least $130 on online shops. FML

This Troper managed to waste the best part of an hour hunting high and low for her lost glasses, before a friend pointed out that she was already wearing them. Oh the shame...Fortunately the friend cannot mock her anymore as she herself caught the IdiotBall a week later by managing to drop a laptop on her face and give herself a black eye. Every cloud.

How the hell did she manage to do that?

Well, actually, you're just human. No, I mean, really. It's part of human psychology. We're bombarded with such huge amounts of raw data on a regular basis that sapient minds discard any data that doesn't seem strictly pertinent (see: Neural adaption). If you've worn glasses the majority of your life, this includes them. Happens to me all the time: #QUOTE# Father: "Hey, hand me that {{MacGuffin}}." #QUOTE# Troper: "Sure! Where is it?" #QUOTE# Father: "''...in your freakin' hand.''" #QUOTE# Troper: "Oh! Forgot I was holding it."

This Troper once ended up eating lunch whilst some members of his social circle decided it would be a 'brilliant' idea to snort pure citric acid, to see what would happen. I had to pretend that I had nothing to do with them as one full-on screamed and tried to remove the entirety of his inner nostril, another went blind in one eye for half an hour, and the third just sat there and stared at a wall for a while, crying...

When I was in my school library researching for a paper, someone tried to scan something from a newspaper or something (which you need to do for no obvious reason). The article was too big to get in one scan. Rather than scan it twice, he decided to slide it over the scanner because he thought it would get more that way. When the copy came out, it was a big grey blob on paper, ''and he could not figure out why.'' It kinda makes sense that he wouldn't want to scan twice, because the cheap school system makes us pay to use the copier, but that was just stupid.

This troper heard a story (confirmed by a teacher) about a high school couple that REALLY wanted to "do the dirty." At school. Instead of doing it in, say, a car or a closet, the couple did it outside. On a tennis court. Right before school when the coaches were outside.

Ha! This troper heard tell from her brother that a friend of her's, for some unfathomable reason, decided to screw her boyfriend ''in the girl's bathroom during school''. After said friend claimed to only think sex was used for reproduction and never for pleasure. The entire situation was extremely weird though, since this troper strongly suspects that the friend had been lying about stuff before and this troper wasn't attending the high school it happened in (so no firsthand accounts). All this troper knows is that the friend's boyfriend vanished for some time before the two were seen hanging around together. Neither of them (or this troper's boyfriend, who seems to know more than he's letting on) will tell her anything.

One kid at this troper's school asked a girl whether the bathroom was the boy's bathroom. As the girl was walking out of it. And another girl was walking into it. And the "Girl's bathroom" sign was visible on the door. In the eighth grade.

This troper has walked into the men's room by mistake ''twice''. To her credit, the first time it was very late at night and the second time it was during a horrible heat wave (so not really thinking clearly). The first time was worse really, since it was a Halloween party and this troper walked in ''wearing a wedding dress'' and came back out to see that a couple of chaperons saw the whole thing.

After an english test recently, a girl who turned in her test went over to the garbage can to throw away her cheat sheet. In front of the teacher.

This troper once thought that she had left her science binder at lunch and asked her teacher if she could go and get it. She hurried out of the classroom, went to the bench, and didn't find it. She knew she'd taken it out of her locker, and couldn't think of any other place, and so returned to class. There was her binder, on the desk, and the boys who sat around her were looking at her funny. Turned out they'd grabbed it when she wasn't looking as a joke. *facepalm*

I managed to do that with a freaking ''eraser'' (and no, I don't know why the concept of a missing art eraser bothered me so damn much). No one grabbed it, but I'd thought the thing had fallen out of my backpack. I even went back to my previous class to look for it (which got me odd looks from everyone and a very awkward interrogation from my brother). Turns out the damn thing was under a sheet of notebook paper in the classroom. On my desk. Cue FacePalm.

This supposedly-intelligent Troper did something similar with her lunchbox; looked in her bag at lunch, couldn't find it, so she went to her previous two classrooms, which were on practically opposite sides of the school AND she also had to find the teachers who had the keys. She got back to where she sits...and it's under her friend's bag. She tried hard not to brick herself in the head after that incident.

This troper once took a course on Greek Art and Archaeology, a graduate level course, the junior year of undergrad. The course was about six people who all knew each other and had taken many courses with the professor, who is highly respected in his field. With this course pushing me up to twenty-one credits for the quarter when the usual load is twelve or sixteen. That in itself was plenty idiotic, but the pressure to impress them all/hold my own in addition to all the work of carrying oh god-many courses led to some amazingly boneheaded questions on my part.

One weekend we decided to borrow a university van and take a class trip up to Cleveland to see their Greek art display. This university is in the southeastern corner of Ohio. Cleveland is in the northeastern corner of Ohio. One does not leave the state when driving between Cleveland and Athens. But since the last few long, long car trips I'd taken before this one all went out to the east coast, after a few hours I reflexively asked "So are we into West Virginia yet?"

A big project in the course was for each student to teach an hour lesson on some particularly notable piece of Classical art. Mine went off mostly hitch-free, but one of the students after me lectured on a masterwork sculpture that had been designed for people to view it from all sides, since it sat out in the middle of a temple way back when it was carved. It currently resides in a niche in the Vatican palace. My question: "but if it's in that little corner, how were people supposed to see the back?"

This troper, during her freshman year of college, took an English survey course taught by this fantastic older Englishman who had mentioned, during the first class, that he got his start in journalism (and also that barbed wire settled the American West). And then a month or so later journalism school came up during class, and one of her classmates informed everyone that it didn't exist, no really. (Professor: ... yes it does. We used to call it j-school. Classmate: No it doesn't! Seriously!)

This troper is in a Youtube community, that sadly composes mainly of whiny, spoiled, or misbehaved people. I'd said that one of the people was acting rather stupid, next thing I know, he's already off his little prepubescent butt telling everyone about how "mean" I am. Sadly, they all believe him, and think I'M the jackass, just for venting about stupid everyone was acting, after roughly 2 years of putting up with such nonsense. I'll probably be making a new Youtube identity by the end of the year. That's how BAD these people act.

This troper sympathizes and would like to add that she fell prey to the idiocy with arguing with a white supremacist on a video for a trailer of ''ThePrincessAndTheFrog'' (he kept insisting that Disney had "sold out", were wusses for not releasing ''SongOfTheSouth'', and that there was some kind of a black conspiracy going on). She also was enough of an idiot to suggest that there was something irresponsible about a guy in a video who paid his pre-teen son five bucks to wear a dog's collar and walk through the border of an invisible fence (she was called a liberal wuss for that).

It's ''YouTube''! What do you expect?

This Troper once grabbed a plate that I heated a marshmallow on (What? I wanted a smore ;.;) and burned himself

'''You would expect''' me to let it cool down

'''Instead''', I grabbed the plate AGAIN. Within FIVE seconds. Needless to say, the blisters hurt like hell in the following days.

This troper does the same thing with hot chocolate. And then she wondered why food tasted weird for a week after.

In my high school, which is supposedly the best public one in the state, a kid decides that it would be a good joke to steal ''copper sulfate'' from the labs and ''put it into the football team's Gatorade''. Do I need to say more? Thankfully, nobody died, but the members who drank it were sent to the hospital in critical condition and the team could not play that season. The idiot got expelled.

''Only expelled?'' Not arrested?

This. First result on Google.

This troper actually met two different people in chatrooms who truly believed that she was a boy on the basis of her screenname. The last time I checked, tomboys are generally ''female''. In one case, after another person in the chatroom informed the idiot that tomboys are girls who act like boys, the idiot asked me if that meant I was ''gay''.

People would have an excuse if they did that to me, but somehow, no-one ever has. Seeing as my username is my last name, which also happens to be a popular name for a boy...

When the venerable old crossing guard of the nearby intersection got hit by a car, it was met with fear and who they'll replace him with. The township had other ideas.

'''You'd expect''' them to replace the crossing guard and let it go by as usual.

'''Instead''' they completely scrapped any hopes for a new crossing guard, and pretty much expected us to take the bus, without considering the fact that the bus-stop is practically a MILE AWAY and most don't know where the bus stop is anyway and rather walk.

'''ItGetsWorse''' The backlash against this decision was quite large, with concerned parents bemoaning the lack of a proper crossing guard. What does the district do? NOTHING.

One time in class, I randomly thought to myself "I wonder if this staple will go into my finger if I press down on the stapler slowly" Needless to say, it did, there was blood, and the whole class pretty much gave me a What An Idiot look.

This troper had been complaining about a Youtube user who had been annoying me for two months straight. I'd try asking a few "friends" to help me with the ordeal. \\ '''You would expect''' They would either give me advise on how to deal with the situation, or give me a semi-productive way to get my mind off the spammer. \\ '''Instead''' They get mad at ME for being annoyed at someone they somehow magically decided to view as a good fellow user. Not fair.

This troper's son was playing {{Left4Dead}} on this troper's account when someone asked him (via voice chat) if he was a Jamaican girl named Ellen. This troper's son then explained that he was playing on his father's account using his father's screen name. Cue a beat, followed by a confused question: "So your dad's a Jamaican girl named Ellen?"

This troper remembers when he and his old friend got into the Yu-Gi-Oh card game. He had all fakes (like 8 stars, 400 attack, no really, ALL of them looked nothing like the real design). He refused to listen to me and kept yelling 'I read the damn manual you know stars win!'. Crosses over with didn't read the manual, but they were noticeable from a mile away. So yeah.

This one requires setup. At my high school, there was one math teacher for all four years. Said teacher required students to have a TI-83 series (later TI-84) graphing calculator, which they would use for all four years. In recognition that not all students would easily be able to afford the $140 plus calculator after spending a like amount on informs, metal fees, and the like, he offered loaner calculators with a parental signature. The first lesson of the class was securing your calculator, in which he showed how to find the unalterable serial number hidden in the BIOS, which he recommended you record. A student, having lost his and not wanting his parents to find out, forged his mothers signature on the loan form, then took the loaner the loaner to the shop, scratched off the teacher's name from the back, and covered it with a label. Apart from doing a very poor job of obliterating the name (he didn't use a file, but used an awl, which is essentially a metal pencil) leaving very obvious marks all over the back, but he did not replace the batteries, which were a special brand the teacher imported in bulk from a company in Colorado. He's the only one in the district to use that brand.

This Troper now knows that some people in her Chinese class can't count. We were playing a game where we were in a circle, saying numbers in Chinese in order going around the circle, and you had to clap your hands if you were up to a multiple of three or a number with three in it (she can't remember the name of the game). Every time we either said one of the forbidden numbers or clapped when you shouldn't have, you got a strike, and when you got three, you had to get up and try to draw a Chinese character with your butt. One of my classmates (and he's in Grade 8, for god's sake) managed to pull off an epic fail and had to get up three times. He also had a strike extra against him when we stopped. How stupid.

Kay wait. ''Draw a Chinese character with your butt?''

This Troper is appalled by the former Troper! Who on earth doesn't a good ol' game of ''Kanji-Butt?'' Madness I tell you! MADNESS!

Madness? [=~This! Is! SPARTA!~=] *Reiko-chan kicks the above troper into a conveniently placed pit*

One of this troper's high school classmates decided to bring a particularly nasty type of stink bomb to school one day, with full intention of using it.\\ '''You'd Expect:''' That he'd set it off in one of the hallways, so as to stink out as many people as possible and hopefully slip away unnoticed before anyone could realize what was happening.\\ '''Instead:''' He set it off in the middle of math class. From a table that was sat on the end of his particular row. And next to a wall. And about ten feet away from the teacher's desk. To absolutely no-one surprise he was instantly caught, and earned a week of after-school detention for his trouble.

One of this troper's primary school friends somehow ''poured powdered citric acid into his eye.'' '''You'd expect:''' He would get himself to the sick bay and get it cleaned up. '''Instead:''' He fell over, spent the next three hours trying to wipe it out with a towel.

This troper had a science injury teacher in the 9th grade who... well... Anybody remember that experiment where you heat a soda can over a candle, and then when you put it in water the can implodes and releases a puff of smoke? My usually rather smart and awesome teacher had placed the smoke-inducing water tub ''right under the smoke alarm.'' The fire alarms went off... ''throughout the entire high school of 2500 students.'' Everybody had to go outside and wait in the cold for the fire department to come.

This troper remembers a biology exam where the teacher gave a question about the primary source of sunlight for plants. All four multiple choice answers had the word "sun", obviously meant for free points. Apparently, the teacher wanted to see what the most popular letter chosen was.

'''You expect''': Pick an answer and get free points.

'''Instead''': Someone managed to get it wrong...because they never put down an answer. The teacher was understandably surprised...

Less "What An Idiot" and more "What An Asshole": this troper used to live with a war vet as live-in help, so his health and mental faculties weren't the best. However, it resulted in quite a few moments:

It's coming to the first of August during one of the most unbearable summers we've ever encountered. There's no central air, he's already missed several months worth of bill payments due to frivolous spending (bringing us dangerously close to the third eviction in a row we've had, as a result), and he's been promising me a brand new laptop during that time, to replace the one that was destroyed by his dog.\\ '''You'd expect''' him to use his monthly stipend first to ensure all the bills got paid, then buy air conditioners to help make the summer bearable (or look into fixing the central air), and then see about fulfilling his computer promise.\\ '''Instead''' he blatantly ignores all of the above, and goes directly from the bank to Wal-Mart to buy himself a snazzy new desktop for ''himself''. And when reminded of the more important things he needed to do with his money, he snaps and threatens to buy a computer ''twice as expensive'', if I didn't shut up.

The guy starts gorging himself on diet soda, spending upwards of ''$50'' on entire cases of the stuff, that he goes through in a matter of days. As a result, his medical visits to the VA start going up in frequency due to wildly fluctuating blood sugar, and he starts wearing adult diapers due to growing incontinence. Eventually, he's placed on a 2-liter-a-day liquid restriction, caused by the start of ''renal failure'' as a result of all of the soda he's been drinking.\\ '''You'd expect''' him to finally take this as a wake-up call, realize what he's doing to his body, and respect the doctor's wishes, cutting back on his soda intake to help steady his health.\\ '''Instead''' he ignores this, actually ''ups his soda intake'', and outright ''lies'' about the reason he was put on the restriction, in the first place, when confronted, saying it was due to "hypertension of the heart".

Finally, he's forced to move into an assisted living home, due to the above, but knows he still has outstanding bills, and he still needs to take care of me and my boyfriend, neither of whom have any other place to go, should he abandon us.\\ '''You'd expect''' him to leave enough money in his account for us to take care of the bills and continue to live on our own, until we're able to support ourselves (which he actually promised to do).\\ '''Instead''' he abandons us and vanishes from the face of the earth, refusing to acknowledge that we did anything to help him (which, for being live-in help and ''bailing him out of his missed bill payments'', would be obvious to anyone that we did), and demonizing us as hateful moochers.\\ Yeah, the guy's a prime example of how being a CompleteMonster goes hand-in-hand with this trope, and yes, I'm still bitter over it.

Look on the bright side, he suffered and is most likely dead.

When this troper was in high school, she and a sort-of friend were on their way to lunch when they saw some moron pulling the fire alarm down halfway. When she yelled at him to stop, he insisted that he only wanted to see how far he could take it before it went off and that no harm was done. We get two steps before the alarm goes off. Apparently the idiot was caught with a knife and cigarette lighter as well, so yeah.

When this troper was younger, she and her two friends decided to lift her up in the air on their hands (like cheerleaders do) so she could climb a tree and pick some fruit up there. The instant it was suggested, this troper ''knew'' she was going to fall off. But she let them lift her up anyway. Why? Because even at that young age, this troper had a love for slapstick-ish humor and thought the end results would be too hilarious to miss. They were.

This Troper, in one of her... less-than-brilliant moments, was trying to finish up a paper early in the morning in her dorm room while her roommate was asleep. Finished it and needed to print it, but was worried about waking up her roommate with the noise the printer made with class in about a half an hour. Her brilliant solution? Wake up roommate in order to ask permission to use printer on the off-chance it might wake up the roommate. Roommate... was not happy.

Are you by any chance blond? Change your delivery and you've got a perfect dumb blond joke.

Very brunette, actually, and not much of anything in the looks department. More along the lines of DitzyGenius than anything.

I'm fortunate the end results weren't a lot worse, but the following is the longest series of decisions I've held onto the idiot ball while making:

I'm out on my own, and a complete stranger says he needs change for two twenties, but actually has left the money back at his place the next train station over.

'''You'd think I'd:''' see right through this, politely decline and be on my way.

'''Instead I''': hand a complete stranger $40 and take the train over with him.

We get out of the train, end up walking much further than he claimed we would. He starts getting agitated that I opted to come with him instead of trusting him to get back with my money, but refuses to just give me the money back and call the deal off.

'''You'd think I'd''': Accept that money as being as good as gone at this point, rather than continuing to follow a stranger who is now angry at me through unfamiliar and increasingly sketchy territory.

'''Instead I''': Keep going.

At this point there's kind of a heated argument, and he insists on throwing the money back in my bag rather than hand it to me. I accept this, and of course after he's run off I find he just threw a single 10 dollar bill in. I'm not even going to frame that last one as an idiot moment though, because it honestly did seem like my options were either losing 40 bucks (or in this case actually 30) or getting beat up and/or killed in an alley somewhere, and the former is vastly preferable.

This troper's brother-in-law seems to have a problem budgeting his purchases and keeping priories straight, which often leads to almost textbook examples of this trope. For example, his check just came in, and his car was needing it's oil changed, it's timing belt changed, yet he wanted to take a trip out of town that weekend.\\ '''You'd expect''': He'd take care of the car first, and wait on the trip until his next check\\ '''Instead''': He leaves on the trip; knowing fully that his oil is in desperate need of a changing and that his timing belt is on the verge of breaking.

Also, during said trip (Which I came along on), he bought himself a new radio for his car, seeing as it's factory radio was pretty much dead.\\ '''You'd expect''': He'd wait until he got home to install it and take the time to set it up properly\\ '''Instead''': He begins trying to install it while we're in the parking lot, claiming it's going to be easy and only take a few minutes. It took him nearly an hour because of constant interruptions brought on by needing someone to go down to the nearby hardware store and fetch something he was needing (Yeah; he didn't even have all the tools he needed before he began).

This troper's dad applies. Because his dad doesn't seem to know how to knock like...''at all''. Without regards for privacy or manners, he just barges ''right on in'' to the room. This is especially annoying when I'm in the bathroom and he does this. So he got an idea to try teaching his dad how to knock. He camped out in his bedroom, then lock the door. Finally, his dad wanted to get into his room...but the door was locked. So after he turned the knob a few times and tried to pull, he should have realized that the door was locked.\\ '''You'd expect''': That Dad would knock on the door to get my attention to the locked door.\\ '''Instead''': He spent three minutes trying repeatedly (and failing) to open the locked door. not ''once'' did the concept of knocking on the door cross his mind.

While in high school, there was an upcoming math test. I got the answers from someone.\\ '''You'd expect''': For me to fill out the test sheet with the answers that I was given hidden away.\\ '''Instead''': I fill out the entire scantron sheet with all the answers before that class. While passing out the test, my teacher sees my scantron flipped over. He flips it over and sees all of the answers filled out. Needless to say, I got a zero.

I was a horny boy, getting into all sorts of trouble. I was in a park where two girls and a guy was sitting. The guy tells me that one of them wants to give me, a complete stanger, a kiss.\\ '''You'd expect''': For me to ignore them and move on.\\ '''Instead''': I stop, ask the girl if she's sure until she says yes. Then I move in to kiss her. The boy tackles me out of the way, and I try to cover up my embarassment by saying "I knew yall were joking!"

This troper has the joy of spending time with this one girl in her classes. She has had this girl in her classes every year since 7th grade, excluding 9th. I don't even have a clue how she got into the High School.

During math, which, lucky me, we've signed up for the same math class next year, we got our schedules for the next "trimester." Suddenly, every horrible thing she'd done to me, every terribly rude comment she'd said about me when she was standing right next to me, was okay, when she exclaimed: "Intermediate Ceramics?! I haven't even taken Ceramics 2!"

It became less funny when I realized I had Intermediate Ceramics as well. It became okay again when during Intermediate Ceramics, two other students were having a lengthy and quite hilarious conversation about summoning a bird named Charles. She proceeded to correct them, telling them it would be "Two eagles because Charles is plural."

This Trooper was in Intermediate Computer Graphics, working on our "money" project, where we were supposed to design money based on a pop culture figure, or a historical one. One girl in front of me chose Marilyn Monroe, and ended up stating that she wished she was Marilyn Monroe. This was a "What an Idiot" moment, since Marilyn Monroe had a mental illness and committed suicide...

Suuuuuuuurrrrrreeeeee she did...

Reminds me of the song 'Richard Corey'. In the last verse, the title character (man who has everything) kills himself, but the singer keeps singer "but I wish that I could be Richard Corey".

This Troper's Parental Unit One once went for new gas, at the gas station an absolute stranger he never saw before approached him and asked for 50€ (~$65), claiming to live on the same street without ever mentioning which. The reason was that the door closed behind them, leaving them without money or keys. The question is what did they do on the gas station very far away from the street?\\ '''You'd expect''': Parental Unit One to refuse suspiciously or at least get all the contact data of that person possible, driving them to the key aid, not going away from their side until they got their door back and PUO his money.\\ '''instead''' Parental Unit One just gave the man the money without even asking for his NAME. Therefore, even the later "looking for his house" was completely futile because one can't find the address of someone the name is not known of. This shows that this Troper obviously got her intelligence from Parental Unit One, as Parental Unit Two still has hers.

There's a girl at this troper's high school (one of his more close friends, as it's a very small school) that isn't the brightest bulb in the box, but hadn't ever said anything THIS dumb before. In the 2008-2009 year (we were Sophomores), a group was looking for members of the school to see if they wanted to go to Europe. She asked, "How will you get there?" The teacher in charge of the organization said, "Fly, of course. How else?" Her response: "Can't you just drive there?" Needless to say, the teacher never lets her live it down, and it's an OldShame for her when someone mentions it.

When I was in 5th grade, I answered a science question on a review wrong by putting "Relative Balance". While I now forget the actual answer, the teacher pointed out that I was close, but I wrote the wrong word (it wasn't "relative"). So when the actual test comes out: '''You'd Expect''': I put the correct answer down. '''Instead''': I put "Relative Balance" as the answer. The teacher facepalmed...

One week in class, we were going to watch M*A*S*H* (The film) and our lecturer commented on the irony of it all, as Robert Altman had died the previous day. One of my classmates chimed in with "Yeah, and the guy who directed it died as well."

I try to pull open a door to no avail, so the person behind me points to the sign that says, "push". I laugh a little, say, "Whoops, that was stupid of me", then ''try to pull the door open harder''. It took me a few seconds to realize this before pushing. The person behind me had a pretty big grin on his face.

I'm talking to my best friend on phone when she is on the public bus, and just for the lulz, I decide to push her buttons (it's really easy) and soon she's having a major spazz out. I then ask her if people were staring at her while we're having this conversation.

'''You'd expect''': That she immediately hang up on me to save herself from further embarrassment.

'''Instead''': She started wailing harder that yes, people are, and thus gaining more attention. This goes on for a few more minutes at her expense (and my amusement) before I finally decide to spare her and tell her to call back when we meet up. For further lulz, when we do meet up, she told me that three guys hit on her, insisting that she should dump her bastard boyfriend and go with them. I lol'd so hard at that. (In case I didn't make it obvious, I am a girl.) She then told me that she'd later call her actual boyfriend (whom she loves very much) to beat the crap out of me for getting her hit on. I'm not that worried. Both of them love me, much to their chagrin ^-^.

This troper can think of two examples:

First, when he was in college; he lent over a busen burner to see if it was on... It was, he had no eyebrow for several months

Second, He was once making caramel and so had melted sugar boiling on the hob. He wanted to see how hot it was... so he dipped his finger into it. The whole block heard may scream.

This tropette is normally very smart, but a bit off center. When she got her locker assignment for school, she tried opening it a few times.

'''You would expect''' her to practice a few times.

'''Instead''', she slid the paper with her combination inside through the slits in her locker, then promptly forgot the combination. It took about 5-10 minutes before she remembered the combination. By then, a crowd had formed.

This troper just bought her textbooks from the school bookstore. She then realized that there was no way she was going to be able to walk the half-mile to the subway with 30 extra pounds on her shoulder (the backpack she ordered hasn't come yet, so she's carrying everything around in her laptop bag, which is already damn heavy due to her laptop). She is currently sitting in the cafeteria writing this Troper Tale and wishing there were a TT page for Didn't Think This Through, where it probably fits better...

Hint: if you want to make a smoke bomb from sugar and potassium nitrate don't:

1) place a kilo of each in a frying pan and place it exposed on the oven's hot plate and

2) don't do in the kitchen.

Or if you choose to ignore the first two points at least remember the most essential point

3) don't do it while you parents are home.

This troper tripped up on points 1 and 2 but I always remember point 3. Just like when I accidentally set off a meter of fast burning fuse wire rolled up in a coil in the living room.

This troper has snorted sherbert....several times...And crushed lucozade tabs...and sugar....and slush puppy (shaved ice and syrup drink).

This troper has a 14-year-old roommate, who has a nasty temper, so much so that he used a door to put a hole in the wall once, so he can't bring himself to refuse any request to borrow his stuff. So, the roommate was playing BatmanArkhamAsylum and was going through the tutorial. Now, this wouldn't be so bad but, even after being told umpteen times, he kept asking me ''every time'' which shoulder button or control stick button was which, even if he had thought that that particular button was a different button altogether earlier! Eventually he gave up, stating that the game was "too complicated", and just decided to play Carbon instead. Yeah, it's too complicated since you have to actually ''learn the freaking controller''!

Just today, this troper's father tried to explain why there was now $1,300 dollars withdrawn in 100 dollar bills from the family's account...''when he had withdrawn the cash himself to pay for a warehouse''. And he got mad at Mom because he forgot!

Not a personal example, but this troper got in a flame war with a YouTube commenter who said that SamAndMax was a boring game because "all you do is click and take to fcking wierdos" (sic) and because there was "no action". Said commenter eventually resolved to making fun of the way this troper looks. Also doubles as my own personal CMOA.

A few days ago, Dreamer}} this troper's little sister was upset and frustrated for seemingly no reason. I asked her what was wrong and she said her cell phone charger was broken and her cell phone was dead, so she couldn't call her friend. When I asked her how it was broken, she said it wouldn't fit in the phone anymore and it should've because it wasn't damaged. So I told her to show me and she did so. Guess why the phone charger didn't fit? She had the wrong phone! She had our mother's phone instead of hers! And it's easy to tell whose phone is whose because they're all different colors (mine is pink, hers is blue and Mom's is white). And when I pointed it out, she said, "I thought mom's phone was orange." *Face palm* My response? "Girl, do you need your eyes checked?!" Ironically, she had an appointment with the eye doctor the next day, but her vision is fine, so it does qualify as a "What an Idiot" moment.

ON my way to work experience today, I noticed there was nobody going down the down escalator. Therefore, like any 17-year old who deep down doesn't want to grow up, I decided to go up the down escalator. Why am I telling you this here? Because said escalator was THE STEEPEST AND LONGEST ESCALATOR I'VE EVER SEEN. Seriously, I had to go up two steps at at a time and I could barely stand afterwards.

This troper knows someone who did not respond or checked emails for several days for an assignment because their internet was down. This person also lives a 5 minute walk away from the college we all attend that has hundreds of computers.

In acting class we were playing a game called 'news conference' where one person goes out of the room, everyone else chooses who that person will be(a certain person, object, animal, ect;), then they ask questions of that person that reveal important information so said person can guess who they are. Ex: Person is a dog, question would be 'why do you like chasing your tail?' One guy was going to be Abe Lincoln. We asked questions like 'Where'd you get that top hat?' 'How do you think of such inspirational speeches?' 'Are you proud of having your own statue?' 'Was that play you were watching any good?', things like that. One person asks 'What made you choose to free the slaves?' The guy's face gets this 'realization' look on it and he says, "Oh! I'm Santa Claus!?"

This troper recalls a girl in his highschool science class asking two questions: Is Europe a country? Is England a continent?

This troper spends a lot of time at her local park, which was recently redone so it has some decent equipment, including a fantastic flying fox. Said flying fox is two metal arches with a cable between them and the seat hanging from the cable. At one end is a platform which can be reached by either walking up the ramp at the front or climbing up the sides, at the other end is a spring which pushes the rider back. (This is all relevant). Anyway, this troper has seen countless small children (and older ones who should be smart enough to know better) do incredibly stupid things such as: stand on the ramp when someone has just sat on the seat and pushed off, climb up the ramp just as someone pushes off, run after the rider and, once they bounce back, try to run along with them ''even as the rider is close enough to accidentally kick them in the head'', stand on the platform in the rider's path, so someone being pushed back up to the platform would crash right into them... even with their parents/older siblings/older relatives/friends telling them not to, so many of them just keep doing it...

This troper's chemistry teacher had us use laptops at times in class. One of these times was a group project, and some people, herself included, started playing games once they were done, although they weren't supposed to. Most people had the sense to make sure the screens were turned ''away'' from the teacher's desk. However, one pair of boys had their laptops back-to-back, meaning that while one screen was hidden, one was ''in full sight'' of the teacher. They continued this way even after she yelled at them.

This troper had a teacher which had a very dim view of plagiarism, and would instantly fail anybody which did it. Why? A few years ago, another student decided it was a good idea to copy something '''straight from his lecture notes''' into an assignment. \\ '''You'd Expect ''' that most students would have learned the lesson, but no... \\ '''Instead''' some of them still try to plagiarize in his class assignments.

A lot of people I know who use facebook fit this troper. You have the internet...and you're using your real name, as well as your real identity. This is open Communications! \\ '''You'd Expect''' that they would realize that if they put up their personal thoughts on the internet, that people would know that others can see it. \\ '''Instead''': I see idiots who have twitters with their ''real names'', posting their geolocations, putting pictures of themselves drunk or stoned, announcing how they're taking a dump, and are somehow ''surprised'' that people they know can ''actually'' find this out.

An estate agency based in the city where This Troper lives came with with a brilliant idea a few years ago -- they would place the names and a digital photo of the current householders on the "For Sale" sign that would be pitched outside their house. Theoretically, this would add a personal touch to the proceedings, and make potential buyers somewhat familiar with the current owners before they'd even met them. This scheme proved a spectacular failure, for three reasons:

Firstly, for some bizarre reason they decided to make it a mandatory part of the selling process. Potential customers that didn't fancy their faces being shown to anyone passing were told that they could go find another company to sell their house -- and for the most part, that's exactly what they did.

Secondly, those personalised signs took far longer to print than the usual, generic ones. Whereas other estate agencies could have a "For Sale" sign outside a new customers' house within hours, the agency in question would generally take three to four days to have the sign there, which pissed off the sellers by costing them potential buyers that might be passing by. Moreover, because the signs were personalised, they couldn't be reused and had to be thrown away at the end of the process.

Thirdly, and most catastrophically, burglars soon worked out how to use the signs to their advantage. According to one crook who was subsequently caught and arrested, they'd bring phone directories out with them, look up the homeowners' name on the sign, and call the house phone. If no-one answered, the burglar knew it'd be safe to break in there and then. Over ten houses got broken into like this before the scheme was finally stopped, and the agency nearly got sued out of existence by customers that had been burgled. They eventually survived (probably because they settled most of the cases out of court), but their reputation took a real beating and has yet to really recover from that fiasco.

Searching for Little Otik. At 3AM. Alone at home.

This Troper got to do this to ''every single member of his MIS class''. Here's the lowdown: Professor gives us a take-home midterm and schedules an entire week for us to work on it, explicitly stating "'''Do not''' come to class on those days." That week rolls around, and what happens? ''Everybody'' (excluding this Troper, whose memory is apparently far superior to that of the rest of his class) shows up, then after several minutes past the time class usually starts begins to wonder where the hell the professor is. \\ '''You'd Expect:''' At least ''someone'' to finally remember that there was no class that day, after which point everyone leaves only having wasted several minutes of time. \\ '''Instead:''' Some genius gets the brilliant idea to ''hunt the professor down''. They finally find him and drag him (figuratively, of course) back to class. Now, I mentioned this same professor in the JerkWithAHeartOfGold entry, so you can probably guess that bad things are about to happen. And indeed they did. From what I gather, cue a half-hour long rant on how stupid everyone is. Needless to say, this Troper feels no shame in openly laughing at everyone who tells him this riveting tale.

In the wake of the 8.9 earthquake in Japan, warnings across the Pacific have indicated that a massive tsunami is about to really attack Japan, but also hit the other side of the Pacific to a minor degree. Meaning the Pacific United States: Oregon, Washing, and in particular, California. Among other places. \\ '''You'd Expect:''' Everyone in the Pacific States to heed the warning and steer clear of any beaches or shores. \\ '''Instead:''' One 25-year-old in Del Norte, California decides to stop and try to take pictures of the tsunami. He's the one dead American.

One summer, this troper was in the kitchen while his mom was boiling water for baths, as their oil ran out. This troper saw one burner on the stove that wasn't red, but the hot burner light was on, so this troper was somewhat in doubt. \\ '''You'd expect:''' This troper would have the judgment to ignore the problem and do something else. \\ '''Instead:''' He touches the burner. He was then berated for that lapse of logic and suffered for the rest of the night.

This Troper was playing TeamFortress2, and due to events irrelevant to the idiocy, my team's MacGuffin was in the enemy fort. I was playing an Engineer, who builds stuff to help the team. Through some miracle, one of my teammates managed to kill the guy holding the MacGuffin, but I was still all the way over in my fort. Not only did I make it there without the enemy recovering the MacGuffin, I started building a Sentry Gun. Almost immediately after it finished building, an enemy Scout decided he wanted the MacGuffin after all, and ran right into my sentry. I picked up his weapon, and used the metal to start upgrading it while more enemies ran into the sentry. I used the metal from their weapons to upgrade it all the way to Level 3, and they were still running right into it. I was killed in the crossfire, though, and the enemy managed to destroy my sentry before I respawned and returned. But they still hadn't claimed the MacGuffin. So I set up another sentry, and an enemy Scout comes from the other direction, grabbing the MacGuffin. He could easily run and claim the MacGuffin, scoring. But instead, he runs ''exactly the wrong direction'', straight into my sentry, ''again''. Moments later, my guys capture the enemy's MacGuffin for the third time, winning the round.

I had something like that happen. I joined a server full of nothing but spies, snipers, demomen, and one pyro. I play pyro because I don't know the other team and had joined a game in progress and...get yelled at for being a noob for playing Pyro and notice everyone's shouting Medic. I notice the team has no medic so I die and become the only medic on the team. This is what the other players do:\\ '''You'd Expect''': That they'd realize they now have a medic so they don't have to type "Medic" in morse code anymore, and that there's now someone healing him. \\ '''Instead''': Because I can only be in one place at once, I get yelled at for not healing a Demoman when ''he is on the other side of the map from me'', someone calls me a "noob" for playing a "noob" class and to pick up some skills playing an actual clas. So essentially...''you're insulting the person healing you''. Needless to say, my heals only went to ''one'' target...the soldier who didn't say a word and learned to only press the key once or twice, not hit the "Medic" key enough to type it in morse code.

I once picked up a dark red lion's mane jellyfish. My hands were burning for the rest of the day.

In a History lesson, a student who isn't the biggest prawn in the galaxy (chinese joke :3) asked "Sir, what did Joseph Lister discover, anyway?" Guess what the teacher said 3 seconds ago.

To ''all'' the players trying to mark crowd control in ''WorldOfWarcraft'': I won't waste my time and mana casting polymorph on a target unless you ''get the dots off'' and ''stop attacking it''.

This troper's former friend sent some nude photos of herself to her boyfriend. She was underage at the time.\\ '''You'd Expect''': She wouldn't check her email at school, or at least if she did, she wouldn't open the reply until she was at home.\\ '''Instead''': She opened it at school, where a teacher saw it, ending in her suspension from school, her stepmother finding out about everything she was up to, her computer access being cut off, the police beginning an investigation (it came to nothing) and all of her friends who knew, including this troper, declaring her to be a fucking idiot.

During the ''New Phyrexia'' prerelease, I and my opponent manage to get each other's life points down into the single digits. I amass a good group of creatures including Jor Kadeen, the Prevailer for the final blow. He has a Furnace Scamp on the other side and several other creatures I can't quite remember. He goes all-out. After counting the rest of the creatures I have and blocking all I can afford to block, I have around two or more open blockers opposing the Scamp.\\ '''You'd Expect''': I block the Scamp with Jor Kadeen (who can kill it without taking damage).\\ '''Instead''': I block everything else he throws at me ''except'' the Scamp because I feared that if I killed it, he'd use the 3 damage that it does on death to kill me. Of course, I didn't read the bit where it says the Scamp only blows up for the 3 damage ''when it deals combat damage to a player''. It explodes in my face and I go down to -1 life. I still kick myself for that mistake.

One time at bowling, Cat}} I met up with a girl who offered to buy me a lottery ticket. She then asked me how much I had for her to buy me a lottery ticket.\\ '''You'd Expect''': I just outright blow her off, telling her that I'm not giving her any of my money.\\ '''Instead''': I take out 30 dollars and give it to her as she just walks off with the money.\\ '''However''': I then realize that it wasn't right to just give her money if I didn't know her all that much. I felt both upset and angry with myself for trusting a Digger}} gambling vixen like her. This is one of those times that being an {{Adult Child}} sucks.

One of this troper's best friends ended up having to work on an essay with one of the most idiotic people in their class. The assignment itself was fairly independent, except for the fact that you had to send your part of the assignment to a group leader to take care of formatting. Said idiot decided to slack off (as usual), and ended up not sending his part at all the night before it was due. The next day, their teacher, gave them a one day grace period to get their stuff together, but:

He didn't contact this troper's friend until 9 pm, three hours after his ''self-imposed'' deadline - and when he did, it was to say that he was retyping his part. The reason? He had to retype it was because he had managed to corrupt the file by trying to embed a .gif animation into it.

And if that wasn't idiotic enough for you: the assignment was supposed to be ''printed out'' to hand in. In effect, he ''actually intended to print out a .gif''.

This troper had trouble Getting Known. They tried, for the better part of ''three hours'', to come up with an original handle. They know how crafty you lot are. My two usual online names? Taken. The name of an original character in a story? Taken. Farley McDoodicus? Crispin Snifflewich? Taken! Patty O'Ffensive? Already in use. Black Dandruff? I don't know how, but taken. But the one that hurt the most was ''Alveolus Heptathlon'', which was ''chosen randomly''. Imagine the shock, as after even trying Squirrel Seppuku Fan they were still without a handle. *sigh* And then, imagine the magnitude of the facepalm when they found out they had been clicking "Create Knowage" too many times.

This troper does not proclaim to be a genius, though considers himself ''reasonably'' smart. He does, however, know a few guys (and a few girls) in their school who have their moments. The first was once getting annoyed with his teachers and decided he was getting out of school early that day. \\ '''You'd Expect''': Him to have enough sense to reluctantly put up with the day. Or at the very least to wait until the lunch break when our year is allowed out and THEN run off. \\ '''Instead''': He tried DIGGING his way out of the school, a la TheGreatEscape. Naturally he was caught and laughed at by the teachers. Later in our year's leavers assembly he was laughed at by everyone there, though he was sadly spared the embarrassment as he was on early study leave (not for that). \\

A girl in the above school thought Buzz Lightyear was the first astronaut from the US on the moon. Everyone laughed when it was mentioned in the above assembly, naturally. Said girl also gets drunk repeatedly and several of our year comment her liver will stop working over the next few years.

Another moment. When on a trip to Northern Spain, near Bilbao, a VERY stupid student and his slightly brighter friend were asked by some local Spanish boys if they wanted to play football. They mistook this for a challenge to fight. It WAS our first year learning the language admittedly, and speaking with locals can feel a bit unnerving (they speak a lot faster than an English-speaker speaking Spanish would, naturally), but it was still very stupid.

This troper himself did have one moment. After the end of the said assembly his year all went to the park and had a good time. However, after a stormy argument with a guy who had just flipped him off, prank called him repeatedly and been a general dick for years, an alcoholic member of his year (who fits into this trope PERFECTLY) asked him whether he wanted any vodka, and produced a Pepsi bottle. \\ '''You'd Expect''': This troper to have had some sense and expect the vodka to be mixed in with the Pepsi, declining it and deciding to walk home. \\ '''Instead''': Annoyed by his recent argument, he declared it was vodka free, accepted it anyway and downed it in two big chugs. While still capable of rational thought and coherent walking, his head killed for the next couple of hours and his friend, who was going home anyway, dragged him along to prevent them giving me any more.

This troper recalls a review of the civil war in her American history class back in high school. The teacher asked one student who the sides fighting in the war were. Easy question right?\\ '''You'd Expect''': That my classmate would have answered that it was the North vs the South. \\ '''Instead''': She hesitantly replied "The...East...and the....West...?" for a war that took place during a time when the majority of the western part of the United States hadn't even been settled yet. The look on the teacher's face...priceless.

But...but how?! I'm a non American and even I know that!

This troper couldn't quite bring herself to listen to a word a former Sunday school teacher said anymore after the woman tried to tell her and her classmates that Catholics weren't Christians. She still thinks back on that day about five years on and thinks "You stupid bitch".

This troper was playing {{Diplomacy}} at a convention once and one of his opponents was SHOCKED, utterly shocked that I would lie and betray him. I was ''this'' close to screaming, "It's a game of Alliances, DECEPTION and Intrigue! How much clearer can it get? Do I need to call up the publisher and tell them they need to add a label saying: '''Warning: This game involves Betrayal!'''? Guy up and left in a rage over it, I ended up in third place after backstabbing the, at the time, first place winner.

This Troper's dad has broken up with this one woman six different times, the majority being because she lied to him (lying is one of his BerserkButtons). The lie that broke them up for the sixth time was very big and involved money.\\ '''You'd Expect''': For him to stay broken up with her and not trust her ever again.\\ '''Instead''': They are back together and planning to get married in October.\\ '''ItGetsWorse''': This basically leads to him and This Troper having the typical parent-to-teenager relationship arguments... but with the roles completely reversed.