This troper is so annoyingly shy... the best example is a school project I did. I didn't have any friends, so I was paired up with this lazy girl who didn't do any work. I stayed up past midnight for about a week and, because I'm also a bit of a doormat, she wanted to read my work and pass it off as her own. When we finally presented, she ended up reading it anyway because I knew if I said a single word I'd throw up.

You just should have gone to your teach and have told him/her that you had done everything. Would have distroyed her grade;).

This troper isn't a shrinking violet only when he's with people he knows. But whenever he's with a large crowd or at least a group of 8+ people, he always has his head down and is completely stoic most of the time.

@/RadioactiveZombie needs to stop adding crappy articles: Hoo, boy. His brother has said a total of sixty words to his Sea Cadet unit... and yet, they meet together two times a month, and he only says a total of three words, not including the necessary "yes" or "no" for the officers and [=NCOs=]. And yet, RZ's the ButtMonkey for talking too much. RZ could also count, preferring to hide with his laptop currently (and before, holing up in the library). He's also trying to stop making new friends (in real life, at least), since his attempts in the aforementioned Sea Cadet unit got most of the unit to hate him as a talkative, random idiot, and had another friend turn into a major jerkass. Oh, and the amount of gangbangers that don't like nerds. Prefers working alone, too.

So, then, we're in agreement that the "AlwaysFemale" designation on this trope is a load of bullshit?

Yes. Also, the only time my brother WILL speak to you in massive amounts is if you're a family member.

... You're not one of This Troper's sisters, are you?

Um, um, this.... might be me... but I don't really want to bother any of you so I won't go into much detail about it... *blushes, averts eyes shyly*

This troper's husband. He's extremely intelligent, personable, and articulate...''if'' he's comfortable talking to you. Otherwise he'd just as soon be invisible. It took this troper a long time to figure out how he got this way, coming as he does from an extremely boisterous and talkative family, and she finally decided that he simply never had the chance, growing up, to get a word in edgewise. Troper, for her part, can't get him to shut up, not that she's complaining.

He wouldn't happen to be a rocket scientist?

I ''wish''.

Wow. You married a boy version of ''me''.

Your husband might be naturally introverted. Introverts tend to be thinkers (i.e. self-aware), comfortable being by themselves, and prefer a small group of people to talk to over a larger group.

This troper has always been very quiet and polite. Until she was fourteen, she always covered her face with her long hair. It both irritated and worried most of her teachers. When she had her hair cut above her ears, she still managed to make herself more-or-less invisible, partly by an air she naturally put out, and partly because she knew tricks: sit in the back, read or write, don't say anything, if anyone talks to you, make yourself as bland as possible, if that doesn't work put the stuff people thought you didn't hear to good use by subtly bringing up topics that make the person uncomfortable, etc... I still haven't outgrown it, but since I plan to be a librarian, I don't think it'll be much of a problem. Of course, I'm mainly basing that on the fact I was a good library aide during my senior year.

This troper is in her late 20's, but after much bullying at school and LOTS of social awkwardness, she's still painfully shy and borderline of a doormat since she's THAT scared of people.

This troper used to be the more extreme version of this due to verbal bullying in early elementary school, preferring to be alone and off doing her own thing as she was incredibly shy. Now, she's still shy, but instead of being alone and obviously nervous, she just sits with her friends and only pops into the conversation if she wants to. If there's no one she knows in her class, she'll typically just stay quiet and awkward around other students.

...Are you my clone or something? That sounds very familiar.

No, no, no, clearly they are my clone. ...Or I'm theirs...damn my friend and his experiments.

Sounds like a female version of this troper.

Hey, what am I doing writing shit in Troper Tales in my sleep?

This male troper is like that too, including the bullying, except it was extended up to the end of middle school with some beatings and sexual harassment from the other students added into the mix, and to make things even worse, nobody gave him any help when all of this was happening. NOBODY.

This sounds awfully familiar. You went to one of those dog-eat-dog high schools, too?

No, my high school is alright, actually. Still stupid people everywhere, but no one picks on me. It was elementary and middle school that was Hell. Things were out of control, and it was basically the inmates running the asylum. And I just so happened to be one of the sane guys that got locked in with them. Goddamn public schools.

I have no idea why I'm like this, especially when my sister is so outspoken, loud, and easily angered. I'm even distant when I'm hanging around people I call friends. If somebody does something that really pisses me off, I usually stare at something, thinking dark thoughts, but keeping quiet. If nobody talks to me, then I don't talk to them. And if someone does talk to me, I'm usually uncomfortable and tend to look at my feet. (I also have really long, black hair and have taken to wearing a hat that tends to obscure my eyes.) However, I guess I'm kind of a subversion, since randomly, I start being more outgoing (plus there are people I talk to often at school. Just not a lot of them). One of these random instances involved me eventually saying, "No, begging sounds nothing like barfing! Begging is like...unnnh! Unnnh! And barfing is like, huuuurg, hurrrg!"

This troper is a weird one of these in which she was and still is sometimes with immediate family generally outspoken, loud, and easily angered, but it got her into so many bad situations that she eventually became one of these.

Loud, easily-angered sibling? Think I know where this problem lies - you don't want her to go off so you tiptoe around her and became afraid of ''all'' conflict. MeToo.

Look buddy, I get that all us Tropers probably have this to some degree, but that does ''not'' give you the excuse to plagiarize MY life story!

Oh, hello there, my long-lost brothers and sisters :O

From my experience (not personal, believe me, I'm the polar opposite of this trope) many self-conscious people are shy and reserved due to insecurities (there is no "cute" attribute as opposed to what's seen in fiction), and way more guys are shrinking violets in real life too.

This troper. But it's not the cute, endearing kind, it's weird and just plain irritating. It doesn't help that her face goes red at the drop of a hat if someone decides to speak to her.

Oh gosh, same here. I sometimes get poked fun at because my face goes red whenever a member of the opposite gender speaks to me, which causes people to think I ''like'' that person, when the truth of the matter is, I'm just amazed anyone of the opposite gender speaks to me ''at all''.

Ditto. Summer camp was a living hell thanks to this. It didn't help that the boy on my bus is a perverted lech. I dropped out.

This troper so much that I got voted most shy in my of my high school class, despite having a slow but nasty temper and going off on one of my teachers when we were rehearsing a play my freshmen year. Understandable he was boggled by this.

I don't know if this really counts, but this troper gets mildly nervous if anyone besides his friends or family speak to him. When he does speak to them, he's fairly animated and talkative, but still prefers to stay quiet. More than that, he seems to have some sort of issue with self-deprecation - I just feel like I'm being arrogant if I say anything good about myself - and, much like the troper a few entries up, I'll occasionally feel more sociable at random times. This never really turns out well. You know, I'm just looking back on this and wondering if it's too long and self-centered. TV Tropes, though, makes me feel very comfortable... looking at the Troper Tales sections, I get the feeling that I'm not alone in the various mental issues I might or might not have... that probably didn't make much sense. Whatever. I love you guys, seriously, and also girls, although I'm a bit nervous about declaring any non-neutral feelings about them. Thanks, tropers. *sniff*

This one is looking over this entry a few days later, and is surprised that he got that choked up about it. Normally I restrain my emotions more.

No need to restrain! I love you all, too! ManlyTears time! Brotherly (and sisterly) huggy time!

Awww! *hugs*

Hey, are you my genderswapped, better version of me? With a different writing style? I understand the whole feeling-arrogant-if-saying-anything-good-about-myself thing. I'm just more shy.

This troper was one through out elementary school but by 8th grade I had developed into an EmotionlessGirl. Then sometime in the middle of 10th grade I began to defrost. Now I'm just TheQuietOne.

This troper used to be this. Now, she only wishes she was. It just seems more attractive to her. She is more of a LargeHam now than anything, but fears that it puts people off, and thinks that if she was nice and quiet she'd be more alluring.

This Troper can not seem to talk to ''anybody'' unless they are close friends or family. Not once has he been able to start a conversation without feeling stupid or embarrassed right after. And it's just so hard to start any kind of conversation or other social activity...

You sure you're not me?

This troper is very much like this when going about on his own. However, if he's got friends relatively nearby, he is suddenly afraid of pretty much nothing.

This troper's ex. Now yes, I understand it's subjective but... this woman who looks like a magazine cover model actually said in total seriousness, "I'm nothing really special". Believe it or not, several guys who overheard her comment looked over their shoulders with "What the fuck...?" expressions. They tried to hide it, but a guy notices other guys staring at his girl.

Most people who know this troper ''think'' he is this, but he's really TheQuietOne. Except when it comes to the opposite sex. Then he really does become a ShrinkingViolet.

This troper tends to be this when she is calm and generally happy. Except when during the times when certain things tick her off...

This troper used to be a very hyperactive and somewhat noisy StrangeGirl until she hit her teens. Then she lost all her self confidence and has been a ShrinkingViolet ever since. It has become more much more extreme since she became too ill to leave the house much, and she now suffers from social anxiety. She has still kept the StrangeGirl side of her personality, which probably doesn't help her with making friends.

Damn, same here! Except for the illness part. And the self confidence disappeared right after high school. If it wasn't for the internet I'd never communicate with anyone.

This Troper is an odd variation, in collaborative projects or first meetings he is very talkative and outgoing, after that he clams up.

ThisTroper is almost totally incapable of talking to anyone he doesn't know already. Which creates a sort of vicious cycle, because the only way to get to know people is by talking to them.

This troper's best friend/boyfriend, is another male version of this. He's quiet, and when he speaks, it's in an adorable whispery voice. He's also nearly constantly blushing, but that's for a ''different'' reason, altogether.

This troper fits this to a T. She almost had a panic attack when someone from her college class started talking to her.

This troper is a perfect example of this... when around certain people. She's not sure why, but she feels completely uncomfortable talking to anyone in her class at school, and often mumbles, stares at the ground, and says, "Not that my opinion matters." (And did she mention how much she apologizes?) She's the youngest in her family, too. She doesn't really bother to get involved with others' conversations; she's practically an EmotionlessGirl. She freaks out whenever a boy other than her brother or her best male friend talk to her. In all honesty, she doesn't consider herself to be the least bit attractive, and she has an 87% average. And on top of all that? She's frequently bullied. Yet, when she's around her ''real'' friends, strangers that are her age, or her brother, she's silly and loud. She supposes that she is just nervous around people who previously shunned her, or she expects to do so. She wishes that she could be the GenkiGirl that she is around her friends in a school environment, but...

This troper thinks that description sounds awfully familiar. Do I know you?

Are you... me?

This troper was a school bully who picked on several of these back in the day. She regrets now that she was ever so cruel, but is still irritated by shy people.

Of course you realize that such cruelty produces these.

This troper used to be really shy at one point in his childhood and had trouble in many social interactions. Sometimes I could barely go through a conversation without either feeling dumb, awkward or manipulated (or worst, all of those). Rough experiences I've gone through have taught me to stand up for myself a little better, though. I may still have moments of slight anxiety, but I'm still more sociable.

Subverted in that everyone ''thinks'' this troper is one, but she's really just an introverted CloudCuckoolander.

This troper becomes a temporary one any time he has an embarrassing moment.

This troper, so so much. She has absolutely no idea how to approach people without seeming crazy stalkerish. She's so shocked if someone actually talks to her that she becomes completely unable to think of anything intelligent to say. She talks at Lorelai Gilmore speed, so much so that she often stumbles over her words as they try to leave her mouth before they've entirely formed. And she gets so ludicrously enthusiastic about people liking the same media as her that she jumps all over the person and wigs them out. So mostly she shuts up.

This Troper is like this the majority of the time at school. Amusing enough, she's only like this around her peers. She can talk to the teachers just fine, but she is very awkward around her classmates.

This troper switches between this, and a very vocal jerkass around his friends. He still gets embarrassed over things that happened years ago, and can barely talk to his e-girlfriend when they talk on the phone.

This troper is too shy to really talk to anybody besides his parents and his best friend. He stutters, loses his train of thought, and can't keep eye contact for more than a second or so. It doesn't help that he's not very attractive and lacks interesting, or indeed non-nerdy hobbies. Sometimes he acts like an ExtremeDoormat, and sometimes he acts terse and unnerving. He is, essentially, the ultimate Shrinking Violet, only without the cute. He has pretty much given up on ever getting another friend. Please love me, Internet.

This troper thinks she may be your DistaffCounterpart, being pretty much the personification of ShrinkingViolet, except minus the cute factor.

How could I not love you? You could be my brother!

This troper rarely talks to anyone, except on the Internet. She does try to speak to other occasionally, but due to being thought of as aloof very few people will attept to speak back. It's also rare for her to finish sentences as she stops and rephrases the sentence. (Just did that here, but you can't see it.)

This troper is your Spear Counterpart. Although I sometimes seem outgoing and extroverted, I'm really shy and very self-critical.

Oh. You must be my AlternateUniverse counterpart that somehow entered this one. Hi.

This troper. But she felt much better after reading this.

Oh, good. I was going to post that if nobody had.

This troper, at family reunions and such, especially when his aunts and uncles are going gaga over him. If none of his (English-fluent) cousins or nieces/nephews -- at least the ones that are old enough for him to easily interact with -- are there, he's usually off in a corner or sitting on a table with his parents, playing on whatever handheld systems he brought with him or listening to music. Don't let this side of him fool you.

This troper turns into one of these in any setting outside of the classroom (where she has the confidence to show off) that is made up mostly of people she doesn't know/doesn't relate well with. Being a bit of a Cloud Cuckoo Lander doesn't help her conversational skills with the average person either.

This Troper suspects he has Social Anxiety Disorder. I can't talk to anyone I don't know really well without having panic attacks, and sometimes even people I ''do'' know. I even have trouble walking down the street without feeling like someone is holding a knife to my throat. Which is why prefer to stay inside my house where I feel safe.

This Troper is a misanthropist, applying Sturgeon's Law to humanity. He doesn't seek out social interaction with any but those who somehow left a strong impression on him. Among situations where he knows no-one, he is reserved and defensive if he has to talk. Subverted in that he has plenty to say to good friends.

This Troper (completely unrelated to the other This Tropers) has an online relationship with a classic Avoidance Personality Disorder girl, although not to the point where it has a massive effect. Despite her having sent me 175 emails now, she still hasn't sent one that didn't begin with "Re:". 'Tis cute though!

More than three people I'm not already used to, and I say nothing. More than five, and I begin practicing my ''you don't exist'' body language. One on one? Yeah, too much talking, I know...

It takes ''a lot'' for me to evolve out of this with new people. A friend's sister apparently could describe me only as "the quiet one" because she couldn't even remember my name.

This troper was the male version. With so much bullying in school combined with one of my own friends betraying me to join the bullies, I got to where I hardly trusted anyone anymore.

Due to extensive paranoia and isolation during her early years (My mom was pretty much afraid I was going to get kidnapped at very turn AND my dad was overprotective to boot. The only kids I knew were the three or so neighbors that I had until I was 6, where my world expanded. This troper just naturally assumed that people thought she was annoying and wanted her to shut up. I remained a Shrinking Violet /Bullied Doormat until my Sophomore year of highschool,where I loosened up a bit. Now,I'm more of TheQuietOne at school, albeit this troper is aware many people see her as a {{CloudCuckoolander}}. Oddly enough,despite my change, the Shrinking Violet seems to come out whenever someone slightly attractive of the opposite sex talks to her, complete with stuttering and blushing.

Aside from the overprotective dad part, you are the opposite gender counterpart of me. Straight up...

This Troper, who just spent five minutes debating whether or not to link to her Contributor Page. New people terrify me, and even talking to friends and people I've known for years leave me second-guessing every word I say. Because of this, I rarely talk or speak up online (so hi, bye, this is the last you'll see of me for a while). Compounding the problem, now people I know IRL think I'm some sort of EmotionlessGirl, TheStoic who HatesBeingTouched.

Oh, don't get me started on this one. I'm horribly shy and have troubles talking in public and have troubles talking to new people (for example, there's this girl who I see every day in public traffic and I want to talk to her, but I just can't bring up the courage -.- Tips are most welcome). Despite being male, I fit the trope perfectly.

ItGetsEasier. Start with a subject that's common to everyone and that attracts strong opinions. If you're in school, it'd be that new teacher or your homework. If you're in work, layoffs, payraises, "what's ''in'' that coffee from the vending machine?", etc. Be creative. I'm still working on the 'talking to random strangers' bit.

I must be an aversion. I have no problem talking to friends, family, strangers, teachers, schoolmates, anyone if they come to chat. I just have no freaking idea how to start a conversation myself!

This troper was painfully shy in elementary, usually following what her friends did and ended up being bullied before she had actual friends. Then she went to a different middle school as them, and was pretty much an outcast. She still can't pinpoint what finally did it, but in early high school she shed her shell and is currently a very happy bubbly girl. Some situations still get to her though, and she resorts to her "silent and invisible" mode. This usually only happens with her parents though, so she's hoping college will snap her out of it.

This troper used to fit this trope, but now he has grown out of his shell. But, he has a hard time sustaining a conversation, and starting one. He also still has a hard time talking to people he doesn't know, which is especially frustrating, as he has a crush who he does not know how to approach.

This Avoidant troper (after all, the disorder in the "Real life" on the main-page part is there for a reason), unsurprisingly. What is surprising to most people is that he's a definite drama kid and loves being on a stage, and if he's comfortable (which is rare in public situations), he enjoys hamming it up even offstage... but still freaks the hell out and shrinks away if anyone outside of a select group of people (most of whom are online friends) tries to talk to him.

This troper is sort of a strange subversion. I used to be a Shrinking Violet, but I emerged from my shell and I'm now pretty outgoing. But for some reason, I'm much more shy over the Internet (but only when dealing with people I know in real life). I'm perfectly okay with making a comment to someone who sits near me that I don't know too terribly well, and if that leads to a conversation, well, fine. But me sending that person a Facebook friend request? Never gonna happen.

This troper used to be this to the extreme in high school, but it wasn't cute or endearing because she responded by being an unintentional {{Jerkass}} to anyone she had to speak to, and then regretting it immediately afterward. Also anytime she tried to talk to anyone, she would usually have her hand behind her head. Unlike in fiction, a single kind person or group of friends never stepped forward to socialize her, so she ended up having a disappointing high school experience. She got (mostly) better through sheer willpower just before college, where she could make a fresh start in a new environment, and improved throughout her college experience, but still has trouble with people outside her age group or gender, especially potential employers. She is usually hopeless at making phone calls as well.

I'm hopeless calling people too. Phones are for emergencies or important stuff; I don't want to bother them...

This Troper, definitely, and he only recently graduated 8th grade (but, tropes can begin at birth, or something like that. He doesn't know.). Among his close friends, for quite a long time, he commonly communicated through notes that he had written. He can, however be a biiiit of a DeadpanSnarker, which got one of the people he sat with to stop talking to him. Plus, he's very shy around girls, so it's a bit of a wonder how he survived two years of being the only guy at a lunch table (The second year, he had a reason: The girl he liked sat there.). But when he's alone, and he means ALONE alone, like home-alone, or even just home with nobody else; he is a CloudCukkooLander to no end. He has run around screaming about peanut butter-stick shift-DeathNote-Death Star-Rainbow-death-sticks (covered in space alien pastries). He also gets hyped up when talking to his best friend on the phone (They live in different parts of the US). In a school environment, he has only come out of his shell twice: Once when all five gym classes had dance as a unit, with each group choreographing a dance, his part being a breakdancing solo; The second time was at the Mandatory-Graduation-No-dates-allowed-School-Dance, he basically started breakdancing in a corner of the gym and everybody started going "Go Troper," but his slacks/dress shirt/slash broken dress shoe (don't ask) combo forced him to go back and be a Shrinking Violet again.

This troper is outgoing... when she's alone and in her home. And she's outgoing outside... when she's with her closely-knit square of friends. If guests are over in her home, she'll let her mother talk to them while she shrinks back to the living room with her computer (and will respond to conversation only with "yes" or "no" or "heh" or "mhm"), and if she's alone outside (even if it's in the school she's being going to for ''six years'' with roughly the same people), she'll do what she has to do for the day, not talking to anyone unless it's necessary, and when it's done, she'll shrink back to a corner of the room, not doing anything but watching into empty space and perhaps doodling. She can respond to insults, putting up (well, what she thinks is a) a cool, snarky exterior, but she usually hesitates before response, and they hurt her heart like bricks of fire. Even to this day, she doesn't let her mother or sister read her stories-in-progress or notes, and she feels inexplicably ashamed of anything she's ever done. On a bad day, she'll respond to any insult -- even from trolls in an online game -- with simple silence. And if she's in an entirely new environment with no one she knows... hoo, boy. She was once interning at a restaurant and picked plates away, and let the other intern do all the social bits (yes, she considers "are you done with your food" a social question) while she stood behind, doing her work and never saying a thing. (When the day was over, she just nodded and waved as she leaved.) When she finally said "okay" on the third day in response to her mentor showing her the right way to slice a lemon, he recoiled in shock -- apparently, he had thought she was mute.

I know what you mean. Pretending you don't care is sometimes best. But then, you run the risk of becoming the mask. If you don't take pride in yourself enough to be bothered about offense to it, what do you take pride in? Depression yay.

This Troper had this through high school, and was regarded (hopefully jokingly) as the most likely one to be a serial killer. He hasn't killed anyone. Yet.

This troper is one in spades. I've been told I can hold a conversation, but only by people over the Internet! In real life, he is too shy to meet new people, his body language is a mess, and has a hard time speaking up. However, this does not mean that he doesn't like making friends, but this makes it very hard for him to do so.

Her shy demeanor is probably this troper's most dominant personality trait. So she just admits it. For (a recent) example, when told that she was quiet by someone she didn't too know well, yet, she responded "yeah, well, that's because I'm sick..." - which was true - "...and I'm just quiet" *chuckles softly* . By admitting it, she finds she can fare relatively well with people.

You're a lucky one! ;) You have a 'cuter' variation of shyness.

Like many other examples here, This Troper is quiet and minds her own business unless surrounded by friends and family. She's proclaimed herself "the one that shuts up and does what she's told" when it comes to school, and being alone in public/a crowd of strangers makes her even more quiet. She's incredibly humble about herself, to boot.

On another note, she's joined the TGWTG forums and is following many of the contributors on Twitter, and although she's a giant fan who would love to get to know these people, but she's too shy to talk to any of them. She doesn't post on the forum that much in fear of "bumping" the threads and getting people mad at her. (She's new to forum posting and still doesn't quite get it.)

In my town there's an obviously, painfully shy shop assistant I've seen sometimes working in a kiosk near the middle of my town. The few times I've gone to that kiosk while she's been as a shopkeeper, I've felt like I'm somehow menacing and intimidating despite logically knowing I'm a pleasant almost-average guy. She stares, visibly scared and frightened, at a customer entering like he or she was some violent criminal. Whatever the reason for her shyness, it's unpleasant to walk around looking for snack when you're feeling a stare on your back.

ThisTroper is like this this... It's gotten to the point that once when I commented on someone's conversation at school the reply was "You can talk?" There's no real reason for it, except that I'm very socially awkward and prefer the company of animals/videogames to people. A funny thing about it is though that I am not like this on the internet at all. On the internet and when I'm talking to my family and close friends, I'm like a psycho GenkiGirl or something. I had a friend on Halo that I talked to a lot and once when I told him how I acted at school, he didn't believe me.

This Troper overcame the trope with the assistance of alcohol but... it introduced a whole new slew of problems. Boisterous drunk or uncomfortable wallflower, what's preferential?

I really don't want to get preachy. Turning to booze is one of the worst solutions. Enough said for now.

This troper has a thing for ShrinkingViolet girls, being one himself. Granted, IGotBetter, but I can still be a bit timid at times. I also act as an unpaid/unlicensed therapist for my fellow ShrinkingViolets. If you want someone to talk to, please hit me up on FaceBook. http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=100000114434794

This troper embodied this trope until her junior year of high school. By amassing a loyal crew who didn't mind her quiet tendencies and discovering ThePowerOfFriendship she managed to be more comfortable in social situations. In college now, this troper is still quiet (by general standards) and thoughtful but extremely adept in dealing with others (and even approaching crushes).

This editor showed all the classic signs (painfully shy, glasses wearing, scholastically adept, bullied, friendless nerd) until about her senior year of high school. My usual response to anyone asking a friendly "How are you?" was a painfully honest "Bad." to which their usual response was to toss me in therapy. Eventually I became a StepfordSmiler Type A/B just to get other people to shut up and go away. Fast forward to graduate school, where I still hate small talk, find it hard to make my voice heard in a crowd, and have a persistent inferiority complex, but I now enjoy socializing with various friends (who've told me I fit the "cute" in the trope description as well) and groups of acquaintances who share my interests. Mildly subverted in that I've ''never'' had a hard time talking to strangers in non-social situations, such as discussing a curriculum topic with a professor on the first day of class. I'm sorry to anyone reading this, it was probably a complete waste of your time...

And, as we know, that was practically an invitation for us to say "No, it wasn't." You knew that. But forgive me if I lash out at you, poor lass. I think I speak for many of us when I say that many a shrinking violet was not born but made that way. Not forged that way but beaten into, or out of, shape, and dumped to cool in the waters of indifference. You have my and our sympathies.

Our next focus: What's the cure?

Fast and risky: talk to someone and risk it (results are usually better than you think). Slow and careful: work on the inferiority so that you feel more secure.

Continuing, I am a LargeHam... to my cat, and a few close friends. I am a lot of things to them, everything that I really am, that I am to no-one else. I have five friends. Only two are as damaged as I am. They are also shy. One turned to gaming and eventually drink, the other turned to gaming and the internet. The former is on prozac. The latter should be. I just don't know what to say... I spent so much of my life, all of high school, responding - or not responding at all - to insults directed at my accent, my intelligence, my odd mannerisms - because of my accent and inferiority complex it was assumed I thought I was better than everyone. Also some scuffles which thankfully all went decisively my way, which I'm almost certain pre-empted other fights, and a few instances of basically sexual assault (abuse is okay when it's male on male - not that I could tell anyone). Because I 'won' those battles, but not the war, and because I eventually figured although staying silent and expressionless was more effective for avoiding abuse even though it was totally against my nature to just let people say and do shit to me, they called me a psycho. I never wished anyone harm. I watched everything I said, I ran over every mistake and gaffe a dozen times, I felt no pride in any accomplishment, only shame for every goal not met. I'm not shy by nature, I was made that way. Look at how many 'I's I've used... it feels unnatural. Selfish. Indulgent. 'Look at me', it says, 'look at me'. I don't want anyone to look at me unless their gaze is without contempt or egotistical scrutiny. I just want to be loved, by someone not related to me. But I just can't approach a girl and say something that isn't totally mundane or just so overboard I'm somehow able to blurt it out without my usual introspection. Hell, even after spending a year reinforcing my natural reactions instead of stoicism I'm still awkward, and I don't know what to say. Cue 'Dai Tokai ni Zetsubou Shita'. Don't bother to respond to my melodrama. You have better things to do, like sharing your own experiences with others just as if not more damaged - or just born, or grown, or nurtured that way.

This Troper is a real ShrinkingViolet. Probably not as much as other examples on this page but he is one. When he was in kindergarten, he was so shy that the teacher thought he didn't speak English because he wouldn't talk. He usually doesn't know how to reply to some actions like sudden hugs and gets nervous easily. During elementary school, he was just the quiet kid to everyone else. But he eventually opened up more and more but is still painfully shy around new people and still gets nervous about certain things. Now he isn't much of the quiet, shy kid and is more of outgoing then before.

This troper, while somewhat this now, was a lot more like this as a little girl. I seldom talked to anyone growing up, because I was afraid of being teased (Are Cruel}} and, unfortunately, these fears were often correct). Because as time went on, more of my classmates were meaner to me, I shied away a lot more preferring to bury myself in a book. But then, I got involved with the theater program in high school, and that helped me to come out of my shell a lot. Now, though I'm still a bit shy by nature, I'm much more outgoing than I once was.

This troper is 18 and still timid and shy around strangers and some aquaintences, but was a such a Shrinking Violet before her sophmore year in High school, she had so much difficulty trying to ask if she could so much as borrow a pencil from someone. She remembers one time that a guy had jokingly ordered her to get out of her seat and she immediately did, only for him to tell her he was merely joking. She wasn't really bullied much (very little actually, although she had strabismus/ a lazy eye for her left eye when she was younger), nor truly an outcast, but still had a fear of speaking to people outside of her family and close friends. She was always polite and kind,which is probably a mechanism that goes for the shyness. She ws told that she is really attractive but because of her painfully shy disposition,they would become friends but never ask her out. She's usually labeled ''TheQuietOne'' of the group of friends, whom were more outspoken by her and helped her to come out of her shell a little. She hopes that by college, she'll be able to finally break out of her shell, but also hopes she'll never run into people with a a nasty temper as well as stop apologizing so much, even for apologizing!

This Troper was one until her sophomore year of highschool where she finally showed her hidden 'CloudCuckoolander'' personality, but occasionally reverts back to her Shrinking Violet ways when she is completely alone as a result of an inferiority-complex and being bullied for . . . Well, she was an easy target and her classmates weren't always the nicest people She stood up to them near the end of her freshman year though.

Total ShrinkingViolet here, can hardly talk around people I don't know unless I have someone I already know to act as a buffer, my French teacher always says I'm going to kill everyone someday, etc etc. But I'm really here to ask a question: ''Why do guys like the ShrinkingViolet type so much?'' I see a lot of guys, especially nerdy guys, talking about how cute and MoeMoe they think shygirls are. I don't get the appeal -- maybe because I am one myself? Can someone answer this for me?

I'll take a shot or two. Perhaps they don't understand what real shyness(without the 'cute' attribute) feels like. Perhaps they don't like real life nearly as much as anime and thus enjoy talking about the latter. Or who knows, maybe the appeal is about being able to keep shyness at a managable(read: attractive, fondness-inducing)level or managing to conquer it. There might be other points of view on this one, but I hope this helps you.

This troper will take another jab at it. Some Nerd's are outgoing, and likeable people. Others themselves are the definition of ShrinkingViolet, and find other shrinking violet's attractive because they may be the few people who they can actually relate to. And for some people, it may be that they think that a shrinking violet is someone to covet and keep to themselves, and believe that if they have a shrinking violet as a girlfrined then they will have someone completely devoted to them, I like to think of this last group as manipulative assholes

A third. Perhaps the shyness evokes caring or paternal feelings. Somebody you just want to give a hug to.

This troper is a ShrinkingViolet, and it's been very obvious since entering college. I knew I had issues with meeting people, though that was more to do with being intimidating than shyness. I broke down crying 3 times during introductions and twice after trying to pipe up in class. It hasn't gone any better from the rest of the semester and going into this semester to the point where I can't even interact with my friends without having some sort of breakdown.

This trope was the reason I found someone who liked me. To explain, this one girl in my grade had a friend who was a CloudCuckoolander, and another friend who was not exactly normal herself. Everytime this troper saw her, however, the girl never really talked and was nervous. It also didn't help that she dropped the disguise once but then retreated by to it. Using some InsaneTrollLogic, I deduced that she wasn't like this when I wasn't around, and I concluded that she liked me.

This male troper is yet another textbook example. It's not that I don't ''want'' to socialize with other people; in fact, I ''crave'' it. But I can't get over this feeling that no one else wants anything to do with me, and when people ''do'' bother associating with me, it's either out of obligation or pity. It probably didn't help matters when, while I was in middle/high school, I would try talking to other people, only for them to get up with the most ''disgusted'' look on their faces and walk away. As a result, I've always had the feeling that, to other people, I'm the most repulsive person imaginable, and so I just choose to keep my mouth shut so other people don't have to deal with me.

If you think that way, it will only make you more miserable. In addition, even if that ''was'' true, wouldn't you like to do something about it? Beliefs are never actually entirely true. They're perceptions backed up by certain evidence to strengthen them. If instead of fading away you want to make yourself matter, little by little, perhaps you'd like to surf the Net for help in social difficulties. There are lots of it and I recommend to be persistent. Merely googling 'how to improve social skills' might get you to a good start(my suggestion, anyway). Hope you're at least the slightest bit better off after reading this.

Goodness, I think your the male version of me!

Due to excessive bullying from the second to fifth grade, I am extremely quiet around people I don't know, which my friend finds strange because I usually talk a lot (although very quietly). The only exception is if someone calls me a fag or hurts my sister. If that happens I instantly lose my quiet disposition and attack the person.

I've been a painfully shy person for quite some time, and I'm incredibly awkward in social situations where I'm not completely comfortable. I've actually suspected that I have I'm an avoidant for some time now, although I know it's stupid to self-diagnose. I'm seeing a therapist to try to work past my social issues and be able to function better in life, although I haven't brought up avoidant personality disorder. I've also considered the possibility that I have Asperger's, but the therapist specifically brought it up in order to dismiss it. In any case, I've started to reach the 'growing out of it' part of the trope.

Somehow I think I can't help but be a natural at this. I don't even ''want'' to be; I just am. I mean, I'm perfectly outgoing, snarky, and witty around people I'm close to but around aquaintances and even distant friends I feel so weird. It's like every comeback, thought, and witty dialogue I possess just goes out of my head and I can't stop it. My voice all the sudden is softer even though I feel like I'm screaming at the person next to me yet no one can hear me. I feel so very out of place so I just end up retreating into books and ipods to make myself feel less alone. Because of this kids at my high school think I have no personality; in gym class one guy called me a "walking vegetable" and it really, ''really'' hurt. Even when two jerkasses walking behind me were talking about "fucking me" or something like that I just couldn't find the voice to snap back at them. At the best I'm known as a quiet, innocent looking girl who will occasionally lash out and at worst I'm a snooty know-it-all who's too arrogant to interact with others. The weird thing is that when I'm around people younger or older than me, I can be perfectly conversational and bubbly; around cast members when I do plays I'm a completely different person. My dad can't see why I act so why around other people that I should be used to by now so he's constantly pushing me to be more social which makes me feel even lonelier on the inside. I almost feel paranoid that everyone I know at school only interacts with me because I vaguely know them and they wouldn't care if a bridge fell on me...

Little ol' me. ;-_- I have rather good conversation skills, am quite knowledgeable, a great sense of humor even for the dark stuff, and I'm an all around friendly, polite guy. You wouldn't know this unless you've bothered to talk to me or have met me on the internet.

This Troper is this when around people she doesn't know in RealLife. When with good friends/her brother, she get more talkative, and can show a surprisingly dirty sense of humor. And when with friends and hyper on sugar... she turns into a weird {{Cloudcuckoolander}} who is prone to hammy moments now and then.

This is meeee...except that I hide it fairly well. I can have a pretty animated conversation with close friends, or a slightly less fast-paced conversation with one or two, I'm a nerd in good standing and surrounded by my kind, I'm fairly funny, and I seem to talk an awful lot, but as for...starting a conversation, talking about myself, giving or receiving compliments, expressing feelings or otherwise talking about myself, talking to authority figures or anyone I don't know, generally doing anything that doesn't fall under "speak when spoken to" and its variants...yeah, not this chick. And I hate it.

Police Man}} This Troper is extremely shy, especially around girls. A combination of shyness, eccentricity and being a CuteShotaroBoy means I only recently became acquainted with some females (I attend an all-boys school, which I hate). I once met someone who was really nice to me around last September- FreakyFashionMildMind types -but I never saw them again. Now, I am attending youth club, and so far I've been lucky enough to meet some girls who happened to know my friends (I wouldn't have gotten to know them otherwise). They're nice too, but since I'm the quiet person of the group, I never say anything because I don't really know what to say and even if I did, I probably wouldn't say it. At one point, there was this disco all the clubs had organised and I was the only one who wouldn't join in the dancing and mingling (it was my first disco). People haved tried to encourage me, but they don't understand that I'm trying really hard. I even get scared when a girl tries to sit next to me! It's making me uncomfortable just thinking about it!(!)

This troper. I'm very quiet. It's n-n-not that I'm shy. I just don't want to say anything because I fear getting mocked at. One of the many reasons have very few close friends

I've been nicknamed Sakaki by a close friend for reasons that I will list: Huge, dark-haired, shy, blushes and squees at cute things (plushies and puppies namely), doesn't say much to anyone and everyone thinks I'm a hard-ass (wearing lots of black and almost never smiling doesn't help). I'm also a {{CloudCuckooLander}} and too out of it to realise when someone's trying to speak to me. :S

This troper, having gone through an entire school career bullied for being mute, quickly learned to be invisible. Coupled with troubles at home, at twenty-three, her formative years have left serious psychological and emotional scars that continue to negatively affect her social life.

This Troper... Is actually not a Shrinking Violet anymore. Yes, so sue me, but i used to be. If i remember, i spent my childhood as a bit of a hellraiser, my teenage years as a classic {{Shrinking Violet}}... But now, i'm simply a {{Stoic}}. Although, for some strange reason, i have aqquired some sort of... Attraction... To the {{ShrinkingViolet}}. I'm sure i'm not the only one here, and i'm not even sure why i have this borderline fetish.

This tropette is very socially shy due to being a high-functioning Aspie. I can be pretty wild when I want to be, and once you get to know me I might even be personable. It's in there, you just need to pull it out.

I've been compared to Violet from the Incredibles multiple times. I really like myself and find my thoughts highly entertaining, it's wheather anyone else finds me entertaining that's the problem, I'm a {{CloudCuckooLander}} and socially awkward. Whenever someone speaks to me I panic, feel like an idiot, and on occasion, turn bright red and I am physically unable to start a conversation unless it's absolutely nessecary. I've recently decided making new friends isn't worth all the anxiety, I have one best friend and that's enough for me. I can go an entire week without talking to anyone, including my college roomate.

This troper's shrinking violet tenancies is pretty bad among non-friends. If around friends, I'm perfectly fine...but can have problems ordering food or asking for a take-out bag. It's so bad that friends of mine make in a constant joke (for the last 10 years!) that my birthday present will be introducing me to and getting me a girlfriend.