This troper intends to have a bitchin' party at his funeral, including a New Orleans jazz band, tailgating at the graveyard, and culminating in being shot out of a canon into the casket in his grave while on fire.

This troper's grandma actually ends up having lots of fun at funerals, as all of her friends are way too old and tired to throw a party, but wouldn't miss a funeral unless they were confined to bed, and if they were they'd still try to get into a wheelchair.

This troper swears that he will deny inheritance rights to his relatives if they dont throw one bitchin' funeral for him.

The viewing for this troper's father had a number of downright hilarious things happen. One aunt brought a bunch of snacks for the family kids and had a cousin refer to it as tailgating. Another cousin was hit on by the funeral director. My brother made a point of asking if the funeral home chose its location because there was a retirement home and two hospitals a stones throw away from the property. A different aunt took a number of kids into the back room to show an ugly pink dress for a potential deceased that she loudly announced she wouldn't want to be caught dead in it, much to the ire of the funeral director; and a mourner ended up hitting on the widow! The actual funeral was a downer, but we swore my father was intentionally manipulating some events from beyond the grave.

This troper's father once amused himself all throughout his own father's funeral by whispering awful jokes to this troper, in the attempt to cause her to burst out laughing during the ceremony. The presence of this troper's grandmother on the other side (who would not have been pleased by this) did not help in the least.

This troper's family has an agreement that, upon the death of one of its members, he or she is to be sent off with a "traditional Irish funeral." This consisted, in the old days, of a wake and service at the home, after which the box was shut and the resulting flat service used as an impromptu bar - the entire assembly gets sloshed "in loving memory". The modern version is to go from the burial to the bar, still in mourning garb, and drink till you, er, drop. This is supposed to ensure the commission of various amusing sins and such during what would otherwise be a very dreary and depressing time.

What's difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.

My grandma wanted and got a wake. Bless her heart, she hated the idea of making us sad, even because she died. Me? I want the same. I"m fond of saying "don't cry over my death, celebrate my life instead."

This troper once attended a clown's funeral; all of his clown friends showed up and played "Amazing Grace"...on the kazoo. Very hard not to laugh.

I wonder if they were Harley Quinn fans...

It's hilariously sad.

This Troper's great aunt brought her ''cat'' to a funeral and a can of my deceased great-grandpa's favorite kind of Swedish meatballs. It was hard not to laugh when she gave a {{Narm}}-filled speech about them too.

This Troper went to his grandmother's funeral. This grandmother had disowned my father and generally ignored his existence for most of my life; heck before I was told she was dead I thought she was already dead but anyway. In the car to the funeral, me and my four brothers are all like, semi indifferent because we never knew the woman. So we put in a cassette (yes, it was the mixed tape era) and what songs play? Queen - Don't stop me now (Tonight I'm gonna have a good time..?), Stereophonics - Have a nice day, and several other songs in cheerful fashion.

Here's what I want my funeral to be like. First, the coffin is filled with heavy alkali metals, and the bolts are made of a material that will dissolve in water. If we can't get those, then some other kind of removable bolts will have to do. Once the coffin's set up, we launch it into a lake via a trebuchet. Once the coffin's in the water the coffin breaks up, exposing the alkali metals to the water. Thus, we get a big explosion. Once that's all said and done, we take the video and put it up on [=YouTube=].

That is awesome.

And like all awesome things, sounds blatantly illegal! Go for it!

My evil plan is to haunt my funeral, to ensure wacky hijinks that will be talked about for years to come. And I want "Another One Bites the Dust" to be played at my funeral.

This troper has often joked about wanting said song to be played at his funeral.

This troper's friend once claimed that when he dies, he wants to be cremated and absorbed into a Shamwow.

Will they use Slap Chops at the wake?

I did this at my grandpa's funeral; I usually use humor and comedy when I'm nervous, stressful or just plain sad...

This troper's family funerals are always like this. Last time, the priest actually told my aunt that he has so much fun doing our family's funerals, he can't wait for the next one.

This troper's high school friend had an odd desire for his own funeral. Through unknown means, he wanted to set it up like a normal, religious funeral...before everyone was seated, and then the lighting becomes like that you would find at a rave, rave/heavy techno music plays, and his coffin bursts open revealing his corpse, clad in Devo hat and sunglasses, raised up by strings or chains attached to his limbs which essentially turn him into a marionette that would dance to the music (or just get torn apart in front of the ones arrived to mourn him). He specifically mentioned that he wanted his mom to out-live him so she could shout "WHAT WAS HE INVOLVED IN?!" I'm not sure what that kind of funeral would imply the deceased was involved in myself...some sort of strange, rave/techno party cult, perhaps???

This troper (for now, at least) wants "Hare Hare Yukai" played at his funeral.

This troper is part-Irish, part-Italian, and can attest that the stories about Catholic wakes are pretty much one hundred percent accurate.

This troper DEMANDS that his funeral be utterly bitchin'. Including "SKILL" by JAM Project, with everybody screaming along with the "motto, motto!" bits, La Vie Boheme played (with somebody getting mad and correcting the female pronouns in the "Here she lies [etc]" parts... and he demands that Through the Fire and Flames be played on the kazoo. Of course, his IDEAL funeral involves having his corpse fired out of a cannon and wherever he lands be where he's buried...

This troper is half-Norwegian (on her father's side), and is seriously considering having a Viking Funeral.

This troper will ''make sure'' that her funeral will be hilarious and/or awesome. No specific plans yet but it will definitely involve the song 'Always Look on the Bright Side of Life' and plenty of drinking.

This troper, assuming he can't steal the "explosion" idea by JBridge, above, intends for his funeral to involve being ''thrown into a volcano''. Why stop at cremation?

Why stop there? Include a small thermonuclear device in your coffin and have it launched into the volcano. Instant Pompeii!

This troper has a friend whose grandfather's funeral was supposed to involve a plane flying over the ceremony and sprinkling the ashes on the guests, as a "surprise." However, they lost the body and found it a week after the funeral.

I've attended a funeral for an almost-but-not-quite three year old girl. It was decided that the funeral should be treated the same way as a birthday party for her - the bit I remember best is finger-painting her white coffin.

Was there a clown?

Nope. Clowns aren't that popular where I live.

...I'm sorry... But all I can think of now is that you live in Gotham... (^_^)'

Not technically a funeral, but there is no tropertales page for GraveHumor. This troper has a strong desire for her tombstone to either say something meaninful and profound about chivalry, or quote the Monty Python Dead Parrot Sketch. Preferably the latter.

This troper (@/DarkLadyCelebrian) spent her grandfather's funeral chasing her cousins through the funeral home and the ballrooms at the hotel. Being five at the time, I really didn't understand what a funeral was supposed to mean yet.

This troper plans on turning his coffin into a giant game of Don't Wake Daddy. So if my funeral gets too loud... SPROING!

Right. This Troper's funeral plans:

At the actual ceremony, Amazing Grace will be played.

At the wake, Amazing Grace will be played... with a kazoo ensemble. Then, they will all sing Always Look on The Bright Side of Life.

This troper's father demands that Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Freebird" be played at his funeral. And I will make sure it happens.

I want my brother to learn AmazingFreakingGrace on bass harmonics(yes, like Victor Wooten does) so he can play it at my funeral. Kazoos will be passed out for accompaniment. And if it isn't awesome enough, he's not getting jack. I probably won't give him any anyway, I don't like my brother all that much.

This troper recently went ot his great aunt's funeral. Throughout the whole reception, he couldn't stop laughing at how terrible the organ player was.

This troper and her best friend have an agreement about their funerals: Whichever of us outlives the other has to ensure that'Renegade' by Styx is played at the funeral. In case we die together and wind up having a joint funeral, we've entrusted the plan to outside parties. Either way, there must be good music to send us off into the afterlife.

A relative of mine went out to 'It's My Party and I'll Cry if I Want to'

This troper wants a bust of himself staring disapprovingly on the tombstone with the inscription "What are you looking at?"

When this troper was seven, her grandpa died. Being seven (and her grandpa scaring the crap out of her--unintentionally), she and her then four-year-old brother spent most of the funeral playing with their dolls and running around laughing. And being excited at the presence of cake and assuming that food = party. On the upside, it cheered up their cousin.

This troper wants to be embalmed, dressed in high medieval gear and laid out like a knight/member of the nobility. With his family crest painted on his laptop, and have that replacing the shield. In a similar manner, an acquaintance of my girlfriend wants to be mummified, with a Harley-Davidson, and entombed in the Valley of the Kings.

In addition to that, my step-half-uncle (we don't have a Family Tree, we have a Family Gorse Thicket) insisted that his mourning bands be tartan, the pallbearer's whistle ''Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life'', and that his (wicker) casket be lowered to Fucik's ''Entrance of the Gladiators''. While this troper unfortunately missed that funeral, he was assured it was awesome.

The idea of a ClusterFBomb song being played at a funeral morbidly amuses this troper.

This troper's aunt's funeral was a Buddhist one, with monks and nuns chanting. And in the middle of all that, a mobile phone went off nearby. It was the Mexican Hat Dance. On another note, the troper would like to have "Still Alive" by {{Jonathan Coulton}} played at her funeral.

This troper has told her family that if she dies suddenly, she wants the following music at her funeral: ''Goin' Underground'' by The Jam (as she wants to be buried), a couple of verses of ''Ding Dong the Witch is Dead'' for the benefit of all the people who will have turned up just to make sure she's really dead, and finish with an audio clip of Porky Pig saying "That's all folks!"

This troper just attended a StarTrek marathon/slumber party. We've decided that should any of us die, we will either learn how to play the bagpipes, or hire someone who can, and have them wear a red Star Trek uniform and play Amazing Grace. If this troper is able to give a speech at any of these funerals, she will add in a few jokes (such as referring to the afterlife as "The Sequel"), and end on, "Of all the souls I have encountered...Her's was the most...nerdy." Also, she is nicknamed "Khan" by this group, so should our Kirk die first, and be buried, she shall have to make an incredibly morbid "marooned in the center of a dead planet, buried alive" joke. This troper expects the same treatment should she die first.

I remember for my grandma's funeral, we all weant out to Bumblefuck, MN for the concessional. A rather sordid affair (complete with "why are they closing grandma in that box" cliche), it was the standard I dress up in my styling 70's attire...and all the North Dakotan hicks come in bright winter coats and business casual. Right, so we go off to do the Catholic holy water thing (Minnesotan, not Dakotan; raised Protestant, can't help it), and as I dip my fingers in ''the holy water shocked me''. Sure, it was just because I hadn't grounded myself on anything after walking on the carpet, but ''dammit'' if that ain't a bad omen.

And on a related note, all I need is a video proclaiming, "All right, I've got $10,000 saved up for my funeral. Buy me a modest box, toss me in a ditch for all I care and then take the rest and go get hammered. My treat."

This troper wants to be cremated - then I want a memorial service similar to the usual Irish wake (I'm Irish myself, after all, just not Catholic). Nobody is to wear black (or "navy blue" or "dark brown" or any other similar colours), and I basically want people to get sloshed - my non-Irish friends as well. I'd also prefer it if nobody cried - in my will I'll encourage them to tell jokes about me at the memorial service. After all of that, I want my ashes mixed with whiskey and poured into the sea (or if for some reason that's not allowed, just scattering them will be okay).

While the funeral of this troper's father was sad, there were are least two fun moments (not counting people having off-topic conversations - a heavy occasion requires them): the troper's mother pointing out how many mayors attended the thing (the current and two former from my city, and the current from a neighbor one) and his sister saying "I could expect him to sit down and shout 'Bazinga!'". (and before the coffin closed, the troper said "Pleased to meet you!" - like the father used to say goodbye with people, even the troper and close friends, something that's either funny or heartwarming)

A few comments on this game over screen state: "I want this song on my funeral!".

''Every'' funeral our family has somehow ends up as an insane, slightly-drunken party/family reunion. Oh, sure, the funeral ''starts'' out sad, but then the alcohol gets smuggled in, the card games start up, the relatives come pouring in...and of course, mayhem follows right after.

Well, my friend's brother died of an overdose. I was at the memorial service when the minister (who clearly didn't know him and who was clearly grasping at straws) waxed philosophical about how much the deceased had enjoyed the city. The people, the hustle and bustle, etc...''The drugs'' entered my head, unbidden, and I ended having to "cough" very, very hard for a solid minute. It ''really'' didn't help that one of my other friends and my sister started "coughing", too. I'm a bad person. Think I pulled it off, though.

Is it gruesome that this troper has her funeral already all planned out? Being a pagan, I intend to have 'Ding-Dong, the Witch is Dead' played as the assembly is forming, and then 'Yakety-Sax' as they send me into the crematorium. I have also officially dictated that people ARE NOT ALLOWED to be sad at my funeral, under pain of very severe hauntings.

My plans for when for when I am no longer making plans include donating my corpse to a joint artistic/sicentific venture in making me into a posthumous cybernetic monstrosity or, failing that, flying over Disneyland and throwing my rotting corpse into an on-board wood chipper...in a heat wave...in the busy season...during the parade.

I wasn't aware Disneyland had a non-busy season.

The first funeral I ever went to was for one of my mother's relatives, whom I had never met. My mom spent most of the funeral chatting with her uncle, who was blind and one of the few people on her side of the family with a sense of humor. There were men playing bagpipes at the cemetery, and because the deceased was a soldier, no one thought anything of it when men with rifles prepared to fire a volley. The gunshots went off right as the music stopped, and my mother's uncle immediately asked, "Did someone shoot the bagpipe player?"

From Fark.com, one Farker's (supposed) last wishes:

"Ok guys, here's the deal. You get to sit through a video of my last wishes, then the will. I want to be given a viking funeral. Cremated at sea. Use a strong, yet flammable wood. Not a damn one of you will wear black at my funeral. Come in what you're comfortable in. Except you, cousin with a nudism thing. Nobody needs to see that. There will be music, but no bagpipes, nothing somber. If I'm being buried, the music will be jazz, ska, and symphonic power metal. I want a bouncy castle and one of those inflatable joust things set up. All mourning shall be done between the time of my death and my funeral. Let this be a celebration of my life, rather than a remembrance of my death. This is going to be a fun occasion for all, so all your families can see that death isn't meant to be an end of all things. Everyone should prepare a few words to say for the gathered, but again, nothing sad. Bonus: Whoever beats the pastor on the bouncy joust gets to give the main eulogy. Once you finish with the funeral and my body is burning, call *insert number* here. It's a skydiving school, and I've put in a standing reservation for the whole party. Then call *insert number* This is one of my car dealerships, and they've been instructed to give every family a new car. Now, onto the will. My flying car will go to..."

This Tropette has decided that her funeral is going to be one hell of a fun party.

This troper's cousin (once removed by marriage, etc...my cousin)'s funeral was a rather sad church affair, but the wake was a big Irish thing with lots of alcohol, as well as the first time I got anything approaching drunk, hit on my second cousin to cheer him up, had an incident with an accidental vibrator (I was staying in the house and hadn't known it was in my bag...) and general shenanigans. My actual funeral will be a relatively subdued but optimistic and spiritual pagan funeral, and I demand a big party of a wake, possibly lasting multiple days. I also want to be burned on a funeral pyre, with some citronella thrown in with the wood so we're not dealing with insects (because this is florida, dudes).

This troper actually thought long and hard about what would be the most awesome way for my funeral to go. I decided it will be an upbeat ceremony with everyone being required to tell atleast one joke at my expense and at the end everyone will be poured a glass of a nice spirit and a toast will be made. Everyone will then pour the contents of their glass on my corpse and light me on fire. Best. Cremation. Ever.

This troper is constantly thinking of ways to improve his funeral, so this will be updated.

Starting it off is me being launched out of my coffin. Loud firecrackers will also be used, since people who know me could easily expect the spring trick.

As soon as I land, I will be covered in flammable materials. Then, chemicals to produce oddly-colored flames will be placed on different parts of my body, and I will be set on fire.

After that is done, kazoos will be passed out to everyone so that they can play Amazing Grace, then segue into Rock and Roll All Nite.

Once the song is done, he eulogies will start. They must be improvised rap, and if anyone pauses for too long, they must let everyone else take their turns before they may continue. Exceptions ''will'' be made for my parents if I die before either, for obvious reasons.

Once the delivery car is visible, everyone will be instructed to use their kazoos to start up a few rounds of the chorus of Ring of Fire as I'm doused in gasoline and set alight again.

This tropette has decided that her funeral must have her Humans vs. Zombies comrades give her a 21 gun salute... using their Nerf Raider CS-6's.

She also disinherit anyone who even thinks of playing "Amazing Grace" or anything by Sarah Mclachlan and/or Celine Dion at her service.

Instead, the playlist for her funeral will include: "Adagio in D Minor" from Sunshine, "Dies Irae" from Battle Royale, almost all of the 28 Days Later soundtrack, "Still Alive" from Portal, and "The Gonk" from Dawn of the Dead.

Following the service, her body shall be cremated and her ashes scattered at Kings Cross Station in London.

This troper wants ''DontFearTheReaper'' played at his funeral, and a firepot on his casket. he also wants to have an open-casket funeral, with his arm on a stick and his fingers aranged -\m/. And to lead his own funeral procession, from a r/c wheelchair. After all, when I Shuffle Off, my body will just be meat. But, since he's an organ donor, he'll settle for having his skull thrown into a regulation-sized grave by a tall, thin, pale man in a black robe. Then, blue-green fireworks set off, illuminating his face beneath the cowl momentarily, and a creepy laugh in the background. He's also to wear my life-mask and attend the wake afterwards. If I can think of a way to make them both work, I'll post it later.

This Glasgow-based troper's uncle was attending the wake of one of his close friends several years ago. My uncle is a die-hard Celtic F.C. supporter, and his friend was a rabid Rangers F.C. supporter, and was being buried with his Rangers strip. Eventually my uncle went to the casket to say his goodbyes, and sneakily took out a little Celtic badge and slipped it into the pocket of the burial suit as the ultimate last laugh.

This Troper's father and two of his uncles gathered for the funeral of a guy they didn't know. Turns out this troper's father is good with morbid jokes, and actually went on a stand up routine using a table as the stage. How two guys beyond their fifties managed to create a convincing stage using a table will be a secret for this troper's lifetime. -IAmNotCreativeEnough

This Troper plans to have Yakity Saxs playing in the background of his funeral, so no one is sad. It will be written into my will.

I plan to attend a former stepfather's funeral wearing only a speedo and flip-flops. I don't care if I weigh 15 stone, that'll only make things worse. I've been weighing out the pros and cons of quite loudly speaking ill of him during the eulogies (he deserved it--I won't say why) especially as I may or may not actually be going-- let's just say his actions got us off speaking terms with his entire family.