A friend of mine who had just come back from shaving his (quite abrasive) beard has the following exchange with me: #QUOTE#'''Him:''' There, smooth like a baby butt. #QUOTE#'''Me:''' I highly doubt that. #QUOTE#'''Him:''' Well, like the ass of a very hairy baby who just shaved his ass.

Trigonometry homework is like making macaroni and cheese. Except you make it twenty times. And you don't know how much cheese there is. You have to figure out the cheese from the milk. Then you have to show how you made the macaroni and cheese. Is anybody going to eat the macaroni and cheese? No. They just go right ahead and throw it into the recycling bin.

On the subject of ''{{Gankutsuou}}'' #QUOTE#'''Friend:''' It's exactly like ''{{The Count of Monte Cristo}}''. #QUOTE#'''Me:''' Except they're on the moon? #QUOTE#'''Friend:''' Well, yeah. #QUOTE#'''Me:''' And the count is a vampire? #QUOTE#'''Friend:''' Well besides those. #QUOTE#'''Me:''' And there are giant robots?

This troper once found this gem on a discussion forum, relating to sexual activities of a highly...exotic nature: #QUOTE#That sounds like something really naughty. And by "naughty", I mean "arousing", and by "arousing", I mean "fetishistic", and by "fetishistic", I mean "gross", and by 'gross', I mean "possibly illegal", and by "possibly illegal", I mean "''really'' naughty".

That's not that big a dissimile.

Still counts. It's just a subversion.

Fun with directions: #QUOTE#'''Boyfriend''': So at the next light, I make a right?\\ '''This troper''': Yes.\\ '''DramaticPause.'''\\ '''This troper''': Except it's not a light; it's a stop sign. And you don't turn right; you turn left. So I guess what I meant was no.

About This-guy's iPod Nano's landscape mode: #QUOTE#'''Classmate''': It's like an iPod touch.\\ '''Me''': Yeah, except without the touchscreen.

I don't know if this counts, but, as a subversion, or inversion, or something, this troper says "When it's a warm winter day in hell." This troper, always means Hell, Norway (It's real. Look it up. For the record, "Helvete" is the Norwegian word for "hell".)

This line from my U.S. History textbook is neither significant nor hilarious, but it's just one eye-glazing example from the fabulous writers: "Partisan and sectional pressures buffeted federal land policy like a kite in a March wind." Not like I didn't hate this textbook already.

You'll have to pardon this troper, but I missed something. Perhaps where you live March is calm, but where he lives we frequently get quite strong winds.

That would be Texas's fault. They've a sizeable deciding role in textbook content as major buyers, and the March weather there has stolen my hat a fair number of times.

Playing fast and loose with schoolwork: #QUOTE#'''Friend''': So what're you doing right now? #QUOTE#'''Me''': Reading ''{{Watchmen}}''. And by ''{{Watchmen}}'', I mean "this paper that's due in two hours." And by that I mean ''{{Watchmen}}''.

This troper's friends had the following conversation: #QUOTE#'''#1''': Every time you send an e-mail, it's like burning a piece of coal.\\ '''#2''': I don't think that's how the internet works...

I love using this to explaing my theory on women and men. #QUOTE# Me: "It's Vaginamancy!" #QUOTE# Friend: "What?" #QUOTE# Me: "Vaginamancy! It's like Necromancy, only instead of controling dead things you control men and instead of using magic you use your vagina."

And in the end, the analogy is still spot on. (Although the name should technically be "Mascumancy", since it refers to what you're controlling? Dunno...)

Rather, Necromancy is Latin for speaking to the dead, so I imagine that Vaginamancy would be speaking to Vaginas. Either way your wicked powers don't work on this troper!

Either way, your theory is flawed, as it is based on the wrong female organ.

Mammamancy?

A teacher at this troper's school: #QUOTE# "Imagine a sphere of glass, I mean, it doesn't have to be of glass. It doesn't have to be a sphere either..."

This troper's capsule description of ''TheWallflower'': #QUOTE# "It's like ''MyFairLady'', if Eliza was a depressed {{otaku}} {{goth}} chick. And Professor Higgins and Colonel Pickering were four hot bishonen guys. And they were all Japanese high school students. With no singing. Come to think of it, it's not much like ''MyFairLady'' at all."

This troper deliberately uses it when describing the ''TengenToppaGurrenLagann'' attitude to psychiatry. #QUOTE#Psychological hang-ups are solved by patient therapy, and by "patient" I mean "being punched", and by "therapy" I mean "in the face".

My mother, on the Minbari fighting pike: "It's like a lightsabre without the light."

"Sex is like freeze tag. Except it's played in a bed, usually, and it's not freeze tag, it's fucking."

HSZMV does this all the time. He once created a list called Life is Like a Song, which made a life metaphor using popular bands. His personal favorite was "Life is like a Nicleback song: Some people think it's highly overrated, and the rest believe it's the best thing to happen to Canada ever."

ThisTroper has described The Asylum movies as "Like a porn version without the porn."

Here's a pretty good one I read on a community blog: #QUOTE# "The Qur'an is repetitive. However, almost every time it says something that can be translated as "Allah is Great" or "All Mighty" or "All Knowing" or "Awesomecool", it says it in a different way, with different connotations: there's a lot of subtlety to it. However, yeah, unlike the Bible and the Torah which are apparently prose, meant to be studied, the Qur'an is very much poetry, kind of like a gigantic mantra that likes to repeat himself. Think of Main/FrankMiller (who once knew how to write awesomely), only with even more repetition and much less whores. Which isn't much like Main/FrankMiller now that I think of it."

I have a habit of referring to things/situations like: "This is as X as anything could possibly be without being X at all."

Anne Beeche remembers back when she was first introduced to handball. "So it's like soccer," I said. The friend who was introducing it to me said, "Yeah, it's like soccer except it's not like soccer at all."

This troper's friend Tyler is this personified. Not a day goes by without one extended {{Dissimile}} from him. Can't think of any though. My dad is partcularly good at them too, such as computers being like babies.

I've always used a line "It's just like playing Monopoly, but different."

This troper's friend on Blackberry phones: #QUOTE#"Why does no one want other people to touch their Blackberries? It's like they're like puppies. Except smaller. And with buttons.

About three years ago I didn`t know anything about DeathNote, I hadn`t even heard about it. But one of my friends was a ''huge'' fan, so she decided to fill me in... #QUOTE# Friend: "DeathNote is just like KamikazeKaitouJeanne, except Maron is evil." #QUOTE# Me: "Sounds cool, tell me more!" #QUOTE# Friend: "And Maron and Miyako are both super geniuses. And instead of sickenly cute chibi angels there are {{Shinigami}}. Also Maron doesn`t seal demons or steal stuff, but kills people." #QUOTE# Me: "Awesome!" (At this point I pictured DeathNote to be about a FallenAngel/ DarkMagicalGirl/ AntiHero Type IV with sound powers (because, you know: Death ''Note''), who has the hots for a dark Ichigo substitute in a dark UrbanFantasy setting) #QUOTE# Me: "So what`s the plot?" #QUOTE# Friend: (explains the basic plot of DeathNote) #QUOTE# Me: "Actually that doesn`t sound like KamikazeKaitouJeanne at all." #QUOTE# Friend: "Yeah, you`re probably right."

By the way comparing ''any'' book/ series to KamikazeKaitoJeanne soon became a meme among us.

When someone confuses two unrelated terms in my chemistry class, the teacher says that it is like confusing Friday with a watermelon.