I wasn't there.

...oh God.

For this troper, having given in to temptation from a 30-year old woman who wanted him, thus cheating on what was his girlfriend then. It is something for this troper as being a non-lethal but just as big a MyGreatestFailure as Kainan having lost his family at the hands of the Moorwen. Even if the girl he cheated on forgave him and tried to rebound, there was too much guilt for this troper to feel.

I won't say what it was, but I have my own such failure. And for years, everyone (including the victim) has told me that it wasn't my fault, and I wouldn't have been able to do anything. Rationally, I know they're all correct. But deep down, I can't believe it - maybe because I know that, no matter how impossible it may have been, I'll never be as good as I hoped I could be. The rational mind sees no chance for success. The heart sees its greatest failure.

While I know I'm a fairly good, rational person today, and I have no idea what I'd be like if I hadn't considering how irrational and bitchy I was, I still wish I hadn't overreacted.

I went into a situation that I knew I could not win, despite knowing that it would hurt others. I was too proud. They paid the cost, but at least my pride is intact.

Dropping out is the worst mistake i made. the classes in school aren't very useful per se, but the resources that were at my disposal if i had actually applied myself in school. Those are what I miss the most. everything else isn't currently biting me in the arse at the moment so i don't worry about it.