This troper knows Krav Maga. Possibly the only martial art described as learning to use an M-16 with no bullets as a melee weapon on a solo mission to take out a building. She's also 5'3" and squishy, not too dangerous looking. Combine that with medical training and a detailed knowledge of how to cuss in 5 different languages, she's ready to be scary.

This Troper had a humorous inversion of this trope. My mother does aerobic kick boxing during lunch. When we rented a Wii, she managed to best both me and my brother in Wii Boxing.

This editor was once complimented on the hammerlock he put a guy in during a friendly squabble. When asked how he learned it, he answered: "I watch UFC a lot"

I did this once, too, with the exact same justification. You pwn, dude.

One day when I came home from Karate, my roommate was out smoking on the front landing. Being a smartass, he decides to be clever and say "You shall not pass" to which I paused a moment, looked at my bag, and said "I know Kung Fu". Needless to say, he let me by. :)

AWESOME !!

This editor has a classmate at law school who consistently performs examples of this trope: As he had multiple biology degrees (as well as a physics degree!), we all gave him a pass when he was easily able to explain why an expert witness was wrong in a case about the cause of the plaintiff's carcinoma and able to explain how stem cells are made, which was important to a different case. However, when there was a baking contest at school, we were a bit surprised to learn he was an expert baker. We were more surprised when he was easily able to fix another classmates iPod and hacked into another students e-mail account (in under a minute!). We didn't think we could be more surprised when, at the school's Barristers Ball, he was an excellent dancer. When he was able to help a Trial Advocacy professor with a case she was working by knowing and being able to explain an obscure detail of proper handgun cleaning, we all decided we would assume that he had whatever skills we could think of, unless he specifically told us he didn't have them. (So far, we have determined he doesn't speak Russian.)

You need to raid his house. He ''must'' be some sort of secret agent.

Don't bother. He probably knows how to rig up a fully functional PCR kit and equipment to read a DNA code from common household items. The eyelash you leave behind would condemn you.

The "retired secret agent" theory is gaining a lot of pull with my classmates and me. There was a guy at my school who was having an affair and we all wanted to know if the wife knew. Our one classmate had us all go out club hopping one weekend and have us bring spouses/significant others. He then spent the night chatting and telling stories to the guy having the affair and the wife, both together and separately as everyone got outrageously drunk. When the guy having the affair and the wife left, my classmate straightened up and completely sober, told us the wife knew. Apparently, my classmate was faking drunkenness despite slamming shots all night and had been pumping the guy having the affair and the wife for information without either of them knowing about it. If that is not something a spy could (and would!) do, I don't know what is.

....This guy seems like a total MartyStu, contact your government immediately.

This Troper was once involved in a D&D game where the GM's Professional Arena Football Player big brother came in and started messing with us. After enduring this for several minutes, I faced him and pulled out my "secret weapon," a 15-inch rubber padded cylinder. "What's that, your magic wand?" the jackass had asked. "Yeah," I snarked, shaking the cylinder, to reveal that it was in fact the handle for my US Marine-Issue Stainless Steel Extendable Baton. "Abracadabra, bitch." I then proceeded to perform acts of violence on the jerk that I will not repeat here on advice of my lawyer. Sadly, I was never invited back to that D&D group (the "victim" WAS the GM's brother, after all.)

So... you attacked someone with a ''baton'' for verbally "messing with you" for a few minutes. You sound psychotic. Unless, of course, this is just what your deranged fantasy.

Nothing to see here, just another InternetToughGuy with a vivid imagination.

I did the same thing.

This troper enters a DDR competition at school. I've never really been into phys-ed or any sports teams at school, wear glasses, play [=DnD=] (although most people don't care about that, honestly). I step onto the pad, get ready...and do a six-foot song. ''Easily''. Hey, practice makes perfect.

This troper seems to find new talents every time he tries. So far, he's found that he can beat almost anyone in any kind of fighting, from street fights to swordfights, is an excellent dancer who can learn a long sequence right when it's taught to him, and can sing quite well.

This troper purposely collects seemingly useless (in addition to useful) skills for situations such as these. It hasn't come up much yet except in Scholastic Bowl, a trivia contest, but she's waiting.

Hey, I also like to collect random skills!

This troper knows a lot of martial arts. He's the most feared member of his kung fu class. He also knows various other skills.

Which makes you an example of this trope... how?

Because he knows kung fu, ''duh''.

Which makes this an ''amusing'' and ''interesting'' example of this trope how?

Because he knows kung fu. And "various other skills". Use your imagination.

As a child, this troper spent the better part of six months unsuccessfully trying to learn how to properly shuffle a deck of cards, so as to impress his parents and grandparents in their regular poker game. Then he had a dream one random night in which he shuffled the cards perfectly over and over again for hours... and then woke up in the morning, grabbed the deck of cards, and flawlessly shuffled them on the first try.

I was once challenged by a brown belt Karate friend, who taunted me with the 'certainty' that his karate would be much better than my yellow belt Wing Tsun (which is actually a form of Kung Fu, for added badassery). He adopted his traditional stance and launched one of the 'mega-punch' type things. I side-stepped with a single kung-fu step and punched him in the side of the head. He was off-balance, and went crashing into a desk. In front of about half the year, some sixty people. He was also the one who got in trouble, because sixty people including teachers had seen him taunt me, adopt a fighting stance (the main wing tsun fighting stance I was tuaght doesn't actually look like a fighting stance) and strike the first blow.

Said karateka must have had a very bad teacher. The first thing this troper's sensei teaches is to not go around picking fights. Of course, that means he looks completely harmless outside of practice. Some years ago five thugs tried to mug him...

This troper knows Hoong Ka, Capoeira, Jujitsu and Yiquan. However, I tend to use more specific threats. Ex: "I will kill your children and burn your house down." This was meant as a joke as it was directed at my housemate. When informed that I had no children to kill, I replied without missing a beat, "I can wait."

When talking to boys, girls, and cool adults, this troper will frequently threaten "I know Kung Fu" at random intervals. I don't know Kung Fu. I do, however, know how to draw, paint, and ink humans, horses, dogs, wolves, and still life, write humour, tragedy, romance and adventure (usually at the same time), act, dance, play the piano and the clarinet, speak two languages fluently and somewhat carry a conversation in another, and deliver one heck of a flying Karate kick. I'm fourteen.

This troper does in fact know kung fu. Wushu, to be exact. #QUOTE# PS: This can be summarised by "draws, writes, annoys the hell out of people and can beat them up if they tell her".

This troper once got into an argument with a friend. The funny thing is that the "I know kung fu" wasn't what won the fight. (Yes, I really do know how to use a sword. And a bow and arrow, for that matter!) #QUOTE# Friend: I will hunt you down! I know kung fu! #QUOTE# Me: I know how to use a sword. #QUOTE# Friend: ... You win.

This troper once told this to some nasty boys on the playgroud in third grade, this troper really did not know kung fu because by that point she had only been to one karate class, but it make those boys leave her alone.

This troper knew Tae-kwan-do for a while before he quit and forgot all of it.

This Troper does ''not'' know Kung Fu. I know Taekwondo and happen to be a 1st-degree black belt. Unfortunately, I'm also a bit rusty. Still, it helps to know the technique in case I get into a jam. I also plan to get back into the martial arts one day. Maybe my grandfather (who's no slouch himself when it comes to Karate, kicked ass in Vietnam, and can bust up the feds) can give me a few pointer and teach me how to use the katana he gave me as a present.

I know kung fu....and 50 other dangerous words.

This troper grew up as possibly one of the most unathletic people ever, not even playing outside as a child most of the time. And now I study karate and am pretty decent at it. The result has been dazed moments quite similar to Neo's as I watch myself do a move perfectly. Also, now and then I find myself blocking without thinking if something gets in my face.

Once subverted by This Troper as I do, well martial arts (a bastardized mix of Kung Fu, Shotokan Karate and Tai Chi) and have been doing it for some years now in fact to such an extent that it is instinctively engraved into my everyday movements (E.G: walking down the street, need to move out of someone's path and so slip into a ''forward stance'' to dodge) in fact one time I was walking through town, completely nonchalant past two girls as they walked the other way and once they passed I overheard one of the them somehow stating without doubt to the other that I did martial arts telling this ''just'' by the way I walked, but most people don't have a clue.

I used to take Tae Kwon Do, and got up to Junior Purple (in my school, the green, blue, purple, red, and brown belts were divided into "Junior" and "Senior"). I would have kept going, but I just got tired of Tae Kwon Do. However, I still remember about 70% of what I learned.

This Troper has created his own devastating style of martial arts by fusing techniques from many arts into one. The only reason he isn't dominating martial arts competitions is his vow to only use his skills against those who deserve it rather than in competition.

I may not know Kung Fu, but I know Krav Maga, have extensive training with bow and arrow, and can survive on the streets or in the forest for a week. I also work as an actor, so I know how to imitate nearly any accent and language you care to mention to the point that native speakers are sometimes fooled by my wild and crazy antics.

This troper is learning (Northern) Shaolin Kung Fu, also known as firebending.

Okay, how many times have we all been able to answer a question because we learned apparently useless trivia about the exact same subject beforehand? Also, I don't know actual kung fu...''yet''.

This Troper is a Purple Belt in Jujitsu and everybody at his school knows it for some reason or another. He does not look like the type of guy who could punch his way out of a paper bag but if provoked, he could severely hurt someone. On many an occasion he has taken up a fighting stance as a threat but nothing has ever come of it. The reason being is that for some reason, he could never punch anyone. Every time he goes to throw a punch, something happens and he always pulls his punch. It's annoying.

Back when this troper was still in High School, I had decided I was going to go from one part of the school to another and two other students (same year, junior) stood in my path in the small alleyway and this exchange happened: #QUOTE#Jock: Well, looks like we can finally have some fun with this little smart ass fag. #QUOTE#Me: , you're a 17 y/o normal guy jock who plays football. I'm a 16 y/o anti-social freak with no friends. What do you want? #QUOTE#Jock: Oh we thought we'd give ya a black eye or two, then toss ya in the [gym] pool. #QUOTE#Me:... Let me repeat. You're a normal person. I'm not. You'll try to strike my face. I'll strike your throat and crush your windpipe then watch you slowly strangle over three to five minutes before heading to class. Having said this with a flat, emotionless face they nervously stepped aside and let me pass. Ruthlessness and knowledge of biology suffice where Kung Fu knowledge is lacking.

An ex-friend of mine once threatened to break into my house to take some stuff that I had "stolen" or "borrowed" from her (It was stuff that she openly GAVE me, or little things) and beat me up. I told her that not only did I sleep with a baseball bat in my room, but that I knew Karate and that my dog would attack her anyway. I didn't have a baseball bat (unless an orange plastic one counts), I knew very little Karate based off what my cousin had shown me, and my dog was old and deaf by this point.

This Troper, curious after reading this page as to just how many skills he'd picked up in what he would consider a fairly normal life, made a list. Allowing for a very subjective definition of what a 'skill' was (for example "Take care of a dog" is one, which I considered justified because of the amount of training and care that goes into raising a dog), and also grouping some skills together (the fighting and training skills, cooking skills, etc.) I came up with ''23'' - way more than I'd expected. I'd reccommend making the list - it's quite fun and great for self-esteem.

A friend and fellow student of mine is a 1,80m, 90 Kg (as in "overweight" and not "muscular") guy who likes to listen to classic music and prefers talking his way out of problems - which he is very good at. Then, one day, some racist shit-head decided to threaten his turkish girlfriend, after which said friend just tells him, in a complete matter-of-fact kind of voice, that he just made a big mistake. Cue an epic and completly unexpected asskicking, after which he explains to me that he has been training Ju-Jutsu (the german version, not the japanese original) for several years.

This troper is taking Tae-Kwon-Do, which to be honest, has a surprising amount of little kids in these classes. I'm looking into {{caeporia}} once I reach black belt, but I have a lot of catching up to do before that happens.

When this troper was dating his ex-girlfriend, she got this creepy guy to stop stalking her at her workplace by mentioning that I was an undefeated Muay Thai fighter to a regular customer and jokingly said that I would be able to beat him up, while the creeper was waiting for his drink. Little does he know that the only reason I'm undefeated is because I haven't actually fought in a sanctioned contest yet.