I frequently tell my friends that they're better off not knowing about some of my writing. (It's really not all ''that'' disturbing, it's just GenderBender stories and most of my friends aren't the kind to like it. At least, I don't think they are.) I'm also fond of the phrase "I could tell you, but then you'd only know."

Me being a 12 year old internet addict/anime addict and the girl I now have a crush on were talking about yaoi/yuri (no detail, as we were kids) and my best friend's brother (aged 9) asked "what's yaoi?". I said that and now he will not shut up

I can say from personal experience that invoking this trope in order to shut someone up never, ever works. Ever.

It really doesn't. But you know what? Sometimes, you just have to put up with the pestering for the sake of your poor friend's sanity. This troper usually repeats 'you don't wanna know' a few times, then walks away if they haven't dropped it.

This troper would disagree. He told someone "You. Don't. Want. To. Know. Least you need brainbleach." and that made him stop inquiring.

This troper and some friends were wondering where they should go at lunchtime once. Someone said that we didn't want to go on the field because of "Ya Know... that". I asked what they meant, she told me I didn't want to know, I said something like "I do, that's why I'm asking". ... Turned out someone we know had sex on it.

I have such a reputation for outrageous and disturbing thoughts that when I say "You don't want to know," people believe me.

You too?

I have problems understanding jokes. Specially when they're inner jokes (even if I ''should'' understand) or pervy jokes. So, usually, before trying to figure it out, I realize ''I'' do NOT want to know. Half of the times, when I say it out loud, people tell me their "fascinating stories" anyways.

This troper, during a light-hearted RP session in which he was trying to {{Squick}} another character into leaving him alone, remarked, "YouDoNOTWantToKnow what turns me on." Cue {{Squick}} reaction from another guy at the table, who knew all too well what the answer was in real life.

This troper invokes this trope all the time to get people interested. The troper then tells a deliberately over the top and disgusting story (that is never true) that grosses people out. It's amazing how easily people fall for the do not want to know.

This troper always wants to know. Because whatever it is, it's not worse than what his imagination is coming up with.

This troper delights in relating tales that would normally fall under "You do not want to know", and for some reason people find me trustworthy despite every other thing I say (possibly even this entry) being a lie. So on the rare occasions that I do utter those words (generally because I'm not in the mood to make up an Aristocrats joke), people don't press further.

Over the years, this troper learned many disturbing facts from places such as Animal Planet (The Most Extreme in particular), as well as read a few gross horror novels and short stories. He usually keeps them to himself, but finds himself warning a person multiple times before telling them.

This troper has people say this often enough, and is genre saavy enough to know that it is generally true. However, this troper is too curious to care about that, and usually finds out anyway

Guys generally do NOT want to know about girly stuff (IfYouKnowWhatIMean), but one of my unfriends kept on asking. When I told him, he pretended not to understand, but... I think he got scarred for life.

This troper has gained much very interesting knowledge browsing TvTropes and its links. Brainbleach would be nice, now and then.

This trope, along with NoodleIncident, and the FlatWhat are a part of this troper's ''breakfast''.

How about that conspicuous link to the SCPFoundation (DON'T CLICK IT!) on the main page's index thingy? "SCP Foundation? What's that?" "Ooh, cool. A government conspiracy about various supernatural objects. Gotta check that out!" "Wow, an invincible reptile, a hat that makes you unnoticeable and floppy disks that store the entire internet! And what's this? Ticket to the neverending-" (clicks link and reads...) "Oh dear god! The SCP Foundation is a horror novel in disguise! NOOOOOOOOO!!!"

My best friend asked, while I was playing DragonAgeOrigins about the creature I was fighting against was. It was a Broodmother. I said, "YouDoNOTWantToKnow." He said, "I have an iron stomach." After an explanation of how a Broodmother is made and what it does, he threw up quite messily on the floor. The VomitDiscretionShot trope was not invoked.

I play with this. I never say "You don't wanna know." It's always "I don't wanna know," or "Do I ''even'' wanna know?"

I was reading a book while my sister and her friend were watching a {{Glee}} re-run. I overheard "this is the episode where so-and-so gets slushied." Knowing I'd either misheard or misunderstood, I glanced up and said, "wait, 'slushied?'" "Oh, yeah. It's where the popular kids dump slushies on others' heads." Seeing my bemused "I should have known" look, she added, "What were you thinking of?" "Something completely different.:[[ImMelting Reduction to the consistency of a slushie.]] Don't ask, you don't want to know. Besides, it didn't make sense in the context anyways."

Anybody who's enough of a schmuck to ask "Oh, is that true?" when I say "You don't wanna know" will now get an improvised speech, where I will invoke IncestIsRelative, HotSkittyOnWailordAction, EverythingsWorseWithBears, ScrewYourself, and make something worthy of an Aristocrats joke.

I brought up a dead friend that I had because I met her uncle at work to a close friend of mine. A third friend why it was so important (I never told him who said dead friend was), when my Close friend said YouDoNOTWantToKnow. Thankfully, Third friend did not bring it back up.

There was this little house where a kidless couple were living. One day, they got divorced and he sold the house with everything inside it at a very little price. Then my aunt moved in, and started to check her new things...there was, among other things, a whip. When I tried to ask what were the other things, she invoked this trope.

Something of a running gag in the flag party of my squadron involved the band major (female) and the Captain doing horrible, horrible things. She (the band major), upon hearing us discuss said thing, wanted to know what it was. She pressed further. I invoked this trope by name. She now takes me very, very seriously when I say this.

Specifically, the 'joke' was too horrible to repeat here.

I invokes this often enough due to a lot of strange experiences. The other day I was sitting around IMing my friend when the topic of why my parents won't let me go to Russia for the 2018 World Cup came up. Cue trope name followed by, "and don't ask. I prefer to leave it as a NoodleIncident."

This troper said the exact phrase when a female friend asked me how I knew what "Yaoi" was. (Damn you, TV Tropes!)

This is This Tropette and her best friend's catchphrase. #QUOTE# '''Other Friend:''' Uh, guys? Why do you two never like to talk about the field trip to the theater? What happened? #QUOTE# '''Tropette/BFF:''' You don't wanna know.

This troper was once in a VampireTheRequiem game in which his sire had sent him to talk to a Lancea Sanctum bishop with some...unusual habits. He asked one member of his coterie, who was able to Obfuscate, to come along as backup. He told the others that while they were invited, as it was ostensibly a social call, they really, really would not want to come. They insisted on tagging along anyway. The bishop was of a bloodline called the Feeders and they were asked to dinner.

This is more or less the standard answer i give for why my relationship ended with my last girlfriend. Suffice to say, it was a very negative situation and i'd have people hate me for admitting the exact reason. Hence "you dont want to know" because well, they don't.

This troper was once discussing a particularly steamy yaoi manga she had just read with a fellow fangirl in Anime Club, when a male member (who was a few years younger) comes in with "What's yaoi?" This troper said "You don't want to know." Fellow fangirl was apparently feeling sadistic that day told him to Google it with SafeSearch off. The poor kid trusted Fellow Fangirl more than this troper, so he did. In IT class the next day, apparently. If only he had trusted this troper when she quoted this trope.

This troper's friend invoked this trope when refusing to tell her what "gerbiling" was. She insisted. He told her. She laughed for about five minutes.

I overheard a conversation in class between my teacher and two teenage boys. The boys had been laughing about something, but had not explicitly said what. #QUOTE# '''Teacher''': What are you laughing about? #QUOTE# '''Boy 1''': You don't want to know. #QUOTE# '''Teacher''': Try me. #QUOTE# '''Boy 2''': *whispers it to her* #QUOTE# '''Teacher''': Wow, holy crap. You're right. I ''didn't'' want to know that. #QUOTE# '''Me''': I have a rule. I'm generally a curious person, but if teenage boys say I don't want to know, I ''trust them''.