This not-logged-in-at-the-moment troper once heard someone say something was "simplistically simple".

This troper used this to argue that a "female fronted metal" tag was pointless on last.fm - there are tags for metal and female vocalists, so having "female fronted metal" written alongside the two is pointless as a metal band with a female singer would play female fronted metal.

This Troper's mother once said "If You're going to eavesdrop, listen!"

You know...that's some nice advice. Presuming she meant that if one is going to listen in on a conversation they'd better make sure they don't misinterperet something.

At the time of her statement, no one was evesdropping per se, but we were in a van with very crappy acoustics and she was having a conversation my father that the rest of us wanted to be a part of. After saying the same exact phrase three times, she blurted out the line in frustration.

This troper has an uncle whose catchphrase when visiting pretty much anywhere (especially when cameras are rolling) is: ''"Well, here we are!"'' Think about it.

This Troper's family has a new meme, after my brother called his room "as clean as... something that's really clean!"

Candle scented candles.

They ''make'' these?

Wouldn't they just be candles?

They'd be candles which smell like artificial candle scent.

...Ugh...My head hurts now. Thanks.

This troper was watching ''{{Ratatouille}}'' with some friends. During a scene where the rats were stealing food, somebody called them "hood rats". Laughed. For. Days.

This troper recently described a top hat, in complete seriousness, as being 'all toppy and hatty'. That's a helpful description of ever there was one.

To quote one of my high school coaches, "The key to a winning season is to win more than you lose."

Would he, by chance, be Yogi Berra?

This troper has seen at Wal-Mart...beef flavored beef broth for sale.

Understandable; the beef is obviously of such poor quality that flavour needed to be reinforced.

My father has used the Japanese anime one before. When I explained to him that anime is considered animation from Japan, he said that there are western anime. I still don't know what made him think that.

Gee, I wonder why?

Honey B's cereal, made with real B's. I said that to a friend while she was eating them, and it put the wrong image in her head so she was unable to keep eating them. Poor little vegan.

This Troper went to purchase some Pokemon manga from Borders. She could not find it in the clearly-labeled 'manga' section, and was about to leave when she saw a computer to search. As it turns out, it was in the ''kids'' section instead. So a twelve-year-old girl who looks like she could be seventeen had to trudge into the children's section, pick up a Pokemon manga, and walk out again. (The cashier's face was priceless.) After that night, this Troper has used the term '(it's) like manga in the manga section!' for something that's not likely to happen. Add on 'it's' if it actually happened.

Potted Meat Food Product (essentially, very generic Spam). No, I've never eaten it...it scares me.

One of this troper's favorite jokes: #QUOTE#Q: What's big, red, and eats rocks? #QUOTE#A: big red rock eater.

We have that too: #QUOTE#Q: What's small, green and triangular? #QUOTE#A: small green triangle.

Probably the original: #QUOTE#Q: What's brown and sticky? #QUOTE#A: stick.

A favorite of this troper: #QUOTE#Q: What's red and shaped like a bucket? #QUOTE#A: red bucket. #QUOTE#Q: What's blue and shaped like a bucket? #QUOTE#A: red bucket in disguise. -#QUOTE# '''Red Bucket:''' [[TeamFortress2 Gentlemen.]]

Another Classic: #QUOTE#Q: What's green, nailed to a wall, and whistles? #QUOTE#A: herring. Srsly.

A favorite of this troper, in series, which will require some explaination: #QUOTE#Q1: What's pink and fluffy? #QUOTE#A1: Pink fluff. #QUOTE#Q2: What's brown and sticky? #QUOTE#A2: A stick. #QUOTE#Q3: What's white and sticky? #QUOTE#A3: Katie. Explaination: my friend Katie is tall, thin and pale. Now get your mind out of the gutter.

An extension to the original riddle in this sequence: #QUOTE#Q: What's big, red, and eats sand? #QUOTE#A: big red rock eater ''on a diet''.

This troper likes to respond to questions he doesn't know like this: #QUOTE#Q: What's the answer? #QUOTE#A: That which is the answer to this question.

Subverted by a gradeschool teacher, who insisted that her class went through everything (#2 pencils, construction paper, etc.) like "tissues in flu season". When February arrived, a horrible virus was passed around the school. Her response? "We need parents to bring in more boxes of tissues. We're going through them like... oh..."

I often say that someone is using this even if they aren't as a joke, for example "you know, putting RPG, girl, and half dressed in the same sentence makes it a tautology".

One of my friends is a teacher in Japan. She was grading papers and encountered this nugget of wisdom. "A convenience store is the most convenient of all the stores"

This Troper's physics teacher, after one particularly inane question answer. "Yes, it's a circular circle, but what else?"

When at university we had some alcohol we had purchased in the supermarket and needed somewhere to drink it. We realised the licensing restrictions (and general politeness)meant that we couldn't do this in the college bar, yet there were some tables outside the bar area which we assumed were fair game. We assumed wrong, as we discovered when the barman informed us that what we were doing was "illegal and against the law." We duly moved outside instead, which was quite frankly a better idea anyway.

This troper does this on purpose for comedic effect. One example: #QUOTE#'''Biology teacher:''' Does anyone have any guesses as to what happens during DNA replication? #QUOTE#'''This troper:''' ...DNA gets replicated?

This troper once had a guy enter his car. The first words? "This car has a scent, it smells like a car." My friends use this line to remind him who I am whenever he forgets my name.

Another friend came up with "That cloud is shaped like a cloud!" He was talking about how it looked like a generic cartoon cloud, but still...

Frustrating example from TA'ing introductory geology: Trying to explain what luster looks like. "Metallic luster: it looks like metal." And yet, I still get questions and obviously wrong answers.

This troper once saw in a restaurant menu "Ocha Tea"... ("ocha" means tea in japanese... so yeah)

This troper's textbook AbsentMindedProfessor once set this as a final essay: #QUOTE#Answer any one of the following questions at something like the expected length, or any other question -- check with me first -- arising out of the course. (Due whenever your other work is due.)

Thankfully, the questions themselves were rather more specific.

This troper's accounting teacher: "So as you can see the debits equal the credits because as we all know, the debits have to equal the credits. About 25% of you will still get this wrong on the final." (and sure enough, about a quarter of the students got it wrong on the final.)

This troper was bored during a maths lesson. Enough so that he's got a list of the ways to say 1=1.

I like to subvert this one: #QUOTE#Are you here? #QUOTE#No, I'm already gone.

Alternately: #QUOTE#Is it you? #QUOTE#No, it's somebody really similar to me.

Same for this troper, who likes to combine it with DeadpanSnarker and answer with every cue he can find ''but'' words. #QUOTE# '''Interphone:''' Who is this ? #QUOTE# '''Me:''' It's him. #QUOTE# '''Interphone:''' Who, "him" ? #QUOTE# '''Me:''' Who do you ''think'' this is ? (The joke here is that only I answer that way, so I'm answering without actually answering. I'm that kind of person.)

And here's when I don't know the answer: #QUOTE# '''X:''' Where is ? #QUOTE# '''Me:''' S/He's dead. I killed him.

This Troper's boyfriend says about the same thing: #QUOTE# '''A:''' Where's ? #QUOTE# '''Boyfriend:''' They imploded.

Whilst trying to find something to hold the door open in the lab with my labmate doing a rummage fail, This Troper had the following exchange when they found something they couldn't describe "Is it wedge-shaped ?" "Yes" " It is a wedge?"

In this troper's dreams, there is occasionally a really repetitive song in it. Thanks to this site, I had one recently where the song's only lyrics where "More dakka equals more dakka" ad nauseam.

This troper works at a cafe where one of her least favourite tasks is to squeeze the water out of canned tuna for tuna salad, with her hands. She has described it as "exactly as unpleasant as it sounds".

I teach English as a Second Language and at one point gave my students a worksheet where they had to read a short passage about Spiderman and answer some questions about it. Asked to describe Spiderman in three words, one student chose to respond "like a Spiderman."

I will kill you so hard, you are going to die to death!

I once had to say the following in all seriousness during an argument concerning how much I owed a colleague: #QUOTE#But during the course of you using it, it ''became'' used.

I'll be a while before I let him live that one down.

Similar to the above, this Troper was telling his dad that his (the dad's) VCR still worked. After being asked "What do you mean?" This Troper replied, "It doesn't ''not'' work!"

This troper has seen a sign on a bus that says "Please remain seated in your seats."

This troper, who does this all the time, is a troper who frequently does this. Also, during this troper's Media 1 class, we were looking for reviews of the movie Crossbar, and one called it "'Crossbar' AKA 'Crossbar'".

This troper once drank out of a Wendy's cup that said "If we had cut up today's tomatoes yesterday, they'd be yesterday's tomatoes."

I have had lines from ''TheSocialNetwork'' recited to me, and declared them Sorkin-like.

This biology-teaching troper came across this gem while making up notes on the urinary system, "[The] kidneys are reddish, kidney-bean-shaped organs..." That's right, kidneys are shaped just like the beans that resemble kidneys!

This troper, when asked "When are you finished? Are you finished yet? ... How about now? (etc.)" usually replies "I'm finished when I'm finished!" Also this troper's mother's reply to the inevitable "Are we there yet?": "We're there when we're there".

From 90% of the customer service people I deal with, whenever some nonsensical hoop to jump through comes up in whatever I'm trying to achieve. "Um, why do you require that?" "It's our policy." *bangs head against the wall*